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Checkmate Ch. 01

by2be2sexy4u©
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Comments (5)
by Anonymous

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by LordSlamdawgg01/07/13

Decent but Misplaced Story with Some Intrigue

First off, it must be admitted the author has a good ear for dialog. . Yet this encounter was consensual, why is it here instead of EC ? The offense, however, was nebulous since main couple weren't current lovers. In addition, any man who doesn't wash, splash on cologne with breath mints after taboo oral to disguise traces of a tryst is a mouth breather.

The story seems like one and done. I wouldnt mind if there's an extension to characters' antics, but please raise the dastardly and diabolical factor a bit.

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by 2be2sexy4u01/07/13

First time

Thanks for the feedback LordSlamdawgg. This is my first attempt writing anything like this.

I take your comment about the category, I was really unsure where to put it, but I thought the coercion made it best suited for the reluctance section, though I know those stories are often more violent. When I am reading stories I like to have each chapter of story somewhat self-encapsulated so I took that approach here but there is quite a bit more to come to this revenge fantasy.

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by penthesword01/10/13

Nice little tale of seduction you had there. Really liked the main character and would ne interested in seeing more of her.

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by phil221301/15/13

Great story subtle but vicious

The story very well written. The author is quite talented in detailing scenes so that the reader could almost hear the voices in that last scene with the cunning if a female scorned. That seduction was the optimal sucker mover on poor Ken who she lured in with defined planned moves the grooming the clothes no bra the placement of her parked car this babe was a bitch with a purpose and she planted the seed allowing Roxanne the insecurity of knowing she was there. Then observing Ken running outside pursing this temptress. Poor Roxanne must've been busting and Ken being sex starved was eye to eye with a banquet of sex.poor Ken!!!

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by 2be2sexy4u01/17/13

Thanks!

Thanks to both penthesword and phil2213. I really appreciate the feedback. There is a lot more to come of Bev and her evil scheming. This is a revenge fantasy taken to the extreme, so the deviousness will be a key feature.

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