Chronicles of Joy - Hope

I look and I feel, and I wonder.
As your words stretch out over the screen
How is it possible to feel such away?
About someone I haven’t yet seen.

Affection and real depth of feeling
They greet me with every new day
A message from you puts a smile on my face
Means more than I’m able to say.

As we talk, I feel myself falling
Over and over again
You tell me you love me, a kiss on the cheek
and emotional thoughts flood my brain.

What can I say to make you understand?
How can I make you see?
As unlikely a love between two such as us
It is there, unmistakably

Oh, how I dream about kissing those lips
Running fingers through dark silken hair
What I would give to have you with me now
Or for me to be with you there.

There is longing and boundless affection
There is kindness and love and support
There is everything needed for us to work out
And yet a push is what’s needed for more.

I remember the first that time I saw you
A name on a screen, black on white
Yet after a few interactions
I knew you’d be part of my life.

We talked and we laughed and confided
We cried and hugged through the stress
You picked me up when I felt alone
You loved me at my worst and best

Of course, there were others, on your part and mine
We both have experienced pain
If only we’d take that one final step
I know it wont be the same

I look at the romance around us
Ive seen it work and pull through
If others can do it, in a place such as this
Then maybe we can too.

Just picture the moment we say it.
We confess that real love conquers all
That what we have is amazing and true
And we risk what we have for much more

The hitch in the breath, the fast heartbeat
The choked off words on our lips
The swelling of love in each pounding breast
The meeting of our first real kiss.

It is that moment that I live and breathe for.
The bringing that dream into life
When I get to tell you how I really feel
and our love for each other can thrive.

What we have at the moment is special
A closeness, a love that runs deep
Indescribably bonds of affection
But with limits that we both must keep

Yet deep down I know it can’t happen
At least, it can’t happen yet.
Such things can be said of divine tragedy
When the one thing we want, we cant get.

There is much to be said about timing
It sucks, it’s a simple as that
There is simply too much going on in the world
Too much to be solved in one chat

What it needs is real conversation
To lay it all out on the line
For us to say how we really feel
Test if lives can turn on a dime

Then decide if it’s all really worth it
Do we risk what we have for much more
Is it mistimed emotion and floundering hearts
That fill me with love to the core.

All of this could be delusion
I know what I feel in my head
But I have no idea what swirls through your mind
When you lay alone in your bed

Do you feel it? I find myself asking.
Is it hubris, or maybe its pride?
Is it all in my head, when I read those words
And feel hope build anew deep inside.

There may be a time when you love me
When our lips and our hearts join as one
When I say with conviction you have me
With the rising and setting of each sun

Yet equally likely is nothing
A love Id be wise to forget
But I don’t want to look back, in ten years from now
And see this as my one regret

And this brings us back to the timing
And the problems with saying it now
Its wiser to leave things as they are today
and wait until life settles down

For now I will wait and I’ll wonder
As those words stretch out over my screen
I will tell you I love you and kiss your soft cheek
And hope for that wonderful dream.