I'm Sorry

I’m Sorry

Never a day passes when you don’t invade my thoughts,
Your beauty and kindness surpass the extreme.
I beg for forgiveness, for the pain I’ve brought,
Though you still consume my dreams.

Forever ago, our moment in time,
But in some ways, just yesterday.
In myself, you helped me find,
Acceptance why you couldn’t stay.

Wounded and wandering, searching for the cure,
Feels like I’m stuck on a shelf.
You were the only one with motives so pure,
Who knew me better than I knew myself.

I miss your humour and everyday mind,
I miss your beauty and everyday kind.
I miss your intelligence and razor sharp wit,
I miss your sex, I shall admit.
I miss your love, so genuine and true,
I simply miss, totally you!

Your light shone on a life that’s dark,
My secret was suppressed.
In my heart, you left your mark,
Even when I regressed.

When the waves were crashing all around,
Thank you for calming the sea.
Now that my ship has run aground,
What becomes of me?

We love our own Pink with many a quote,
And I believe for us, in what Roger wrote.
Hey you, don’t tell me there’s no hope at all,
Together we stand, divided we fall.
I’m trying to live by Alecia’s pen,
Reiterated by you, again and again.
When the storm’s out, you run in the rain,
Put your sword down, dive right into the pain.

You taught me forgiveness for everyone has a story,
So I ask the same of you,
You have found your life’s glory,
Your happiness shall ensue.

The blame rest solely in my hands,
Struggling to break this emotional curse.
Manipulate to keep up with demands,
Forced you to give another your firsts.

I’m sorry for controlling with unearned jealousy.
So closed off during your transparency.
Holding you hostage, our armor to anxiety.
Emotionally coerced, waiting on yours truly,
For a date impossible for anyone to see.
Promises unkept, unintended hyperbole.
My attempt at a sincere apology.
I cheer for your future tranquility.
This broken girl from the OC,
Kept us running in circles, perpetually,
Who melted by your Canadian hospitality.
A step past idealization will set me free.
No more fear and dissolve all the ugly.
Soar high, my perfect anomaly!

I will always love you and remain smitten,
But in some form, every day, I cry,
Either our last chapter has not been written,
Or this is forever, goodbye.