All Comments on 'Lying on Quantum Foam'

This is remarkable. It evokes so many important things to think about. I might have reversed the order of line 6 and line 7.

Outstanding poem. I look forward to reading more of what you write.

abyss, clinging, holding. Can you say cliche?

I love this poem. Your are getting a recommend. However, it needs an edit as there are some cliches and redundancies. It's easier to show them than tell. This just my opinion:

I hold you tightly,

clinging by moonlight,

but you are only

a shadow ,

my antiself,

a virtual abyss

from the false quantum vacuum,

waiting

reabsorb me,

reunite me

with the perfection

of empty blackness.

i'm of the opinion that i like what's being said, though i'm not enthusiastic about the way it's being said. that's the overall feeling i get from this. however, your title, and 'my antiself' alone are phrases that make this worthwhile reading, for the imagery they conjure and the thoughts they send rippling outwards....

Suggest rewrite first two lines using only one verb, you don't need both "hold" and "clinging"

"silvery moonlight"...Ugggh

last two lines maybe lose "with, the, of, 'tion and 'ness, and reorder perhaps.

But I still like it a lot.