All Comments on 'My Secret Sin'

to see a new voice here, ifrom a human I adore. The rhyming couplet is generally not my fav, but I think you pulled it off with no forced rhymes, which is always tough. Thank you for sharing this, Noira, I think I understand.

I think it would have worked better if each line had had the same metrical length, I found myself stopping and starting as I tripped over the different metres. Good try though and hope to see you submit more

not seen your poems before, noira, but thanks to espie consider us introduced :)

i didn't find any trouble with the 4,4/2,2/4,4/2,2/4,4 rhythm, and the rhyme scheme came easily enough, enhanced by your nifty use of assonance and consonance.

i'd take a good look at the punctuation you've employed in places - i was left feeling something was missing in some instances and, in others, the punctuation was unnecessary.

fave lines?

The crimson cheeks of her chagrin

The wicked quirk of my dark grin

Five.

Another one that made me squirm in my seat....but in a good way ;)

Well done!

Well done! Thank you for sharing your secret! I felt a little like a voyeur and I enjoy that feeling! Good writing!