All Comments on 'Pastoral'

Demure ....!! Excellent as usual !

moving the focal points changes the pictures shown, TK U MLJ LV NV

is yet again exhibited here, making form-writing appear almost effortless and using it as the bones on which to drape something akin to a foil-picture in this case, where light is the main focus, its presence and its withdrawal.

so prettily put:

the sun, that all the drowsy daytime wooed

this very garden changes its bright mood

dance past the pool of moonlight to the wood

and find the open places that withstood

shy sadness' shadows

except i found '"shy sadness' shadows" to feel slightly out of step in comparison, a bit tongue-twistery, and wondered if "shy sorrow's shadows" wouldn't work as well for this? of course it may be your intention to miss-step us with that line, but i found that a distraction from an otherwise measured piece.

" can't I incite

you to be glad of this enchanted night

and stay until it's broken by the dawn?"

A wonderful line after a wonderfully descriptive poem - could see it, want to go there.