The Cold Front

Riveting,
got me limiting
what I feel inside.

Why did it turn out this way?
It was like words unspoken,
not meant to be heard.
Still, they all gather round to hear your story,
which is a puzzle.
I am stuck as a piece of it,
have me feeling like a piece of shit.

----

It’s morning.
I don’t want to get out of bed,
again.
You are not even up yet, but I am already leaving.
Slam the door.
No idea how you are going to be.
No clue who you are going to be.
Which mask are you going to don?
Today.

It’s noon,
the sky is grey.
Just like you.
The sun’s not shining.
Just like you.
You know I am there.
Do you really not care?

The day is ending,
I see you again.
You turn your back, just like you did before.
Why me? Why you? Why us?
When they see me, you, us.
They start talking.
Their words hurt like pounding hail.
Is this how you feel?

It’s evening,
and you are still awake.
You are on the phone with me.
We talk for hours until we have to go to bed.
I am the one who ends up saying goodbye instead.

The next day, you see me,
and look away…

----

It’s snowing outside,
but the sun is shining in my heart.
Melt away the cold, melt away the fear.
Thaw me out cause I’m barely breathing.
I’ll always be here,
frozen.
Never really knew how I felt towards you.
It is still there.
The only thing that’s keeping me alive is you.
It is cold outside and I’m not sure how much longer I will last.
Sure, we can hope this front passes.
It is the cold I’m going through,
you never even knew.

When you said sorry,
I wanted to believe the excuses.
Then I remembered what you did.
Thought you were different, thought you had changed.
Never thought this would happen now,
but it did. Things have just stayed the same.
Not sure what to say, not sure what to do.
Will you keep trying? When will I stop crying?
Never know, never knew
you could be so cruel.
You know me,
I knew you.