All Comments on 'A Concubine's Tale Ch. 01'

excited to see whats to come!

Barely one page..

:(

Switching between tense is a little frustrating and distracting. Best to choose one and stick with it.

I liked this story very much. You have conveyed the arrogance and command of real power as well as the emotions of the slaves.

Some minor niggles; I agree about the tenses, best to stick to one (at a time anyway), and "letting out a hand" seems a little infelicitous, (how many hands has he got?), how about "he held out his hand".

I do hope you continue. I would love to read about Miranda's first night, and the intrigues of the concubines.