All Comments on 'A Couple of Bars: The Lieutenant'

Yes there was a cheating wife. And a new wife. And an asshole ex-friend. But maybe because it's such an old story and it's been told so many times this just felt flat. He goes to Vietnam, he comes home to a cheating wife, he divorces her and moves on with his life. Kinda like reading a shopping list. The only thing missing was his PTSD.

Thanks for the effort, but no.

3 stars

Damned good story Chasten. I felt that one all the way to my heart.

Loved it. Well done; full marks from me. Thanks for posting.

short and efficient, like a good sergeant

but outside of the willing cucks and pathetic raac soi boys most of us want to know the bitch suffered for her transgressions, not that she is happily married and getting the closure SHE needs despite him being quite clear he wants nothing to do with her

Superb. Definitely a complete story, but I'd love to hear more from this cast of characters. Thanks much.

Fantastic story! Hope you write more about this character. Thanks for the glossary. I was familiar with most of the terms already.

5

Good story, Mr. Chasten.

Not much of a story by not much of a writer.

Good short story!

I'm glad he was brutally honest with the cheating ex-wife. Jackie only wanted to ease her guilty conscience for her appalling betrayal, so I'm glad she realised that he now sees their entire relationship as a horrible mistake. She'll carry that guilt to the grave.

Leslie was a real piece of work. It's a shame he didn't tell that self-righteous bitch to go fuck herself.

Simple and clean.

i enjoyed reading this, but it doesn't seem finished

10 stars.

Many readers do not know of all this shit... Old boots do... Normally I would say thanks for the flashback,,, but those of us do not need the flashback Thanks a 5

What an excellent blast from the past! When I saw didi mau I knew.

Jody in the form of Brad should have suffered a fate worse than death, but the protagonist stayed out of jail.

Well written, well executed.

Like the story. brought back, some good and some bad, memories. I came home, in late 67, to a wife who had been faithful. Thank you.

"I want you to know it wasn't something you did or that you weren't a good husband." - Of course not. He wasn't even there.

"I didn't think you were faithful either." - She didn't THINK he was faithful, but didn't KNOW that he wasn't, so she cheats, just in case he was? In any case, if she KNEW he was cheating, either divorce him, or confront him and try to "find a way past it."

If she "understood" why he would have gone to the "hoochie girls." why get so mad as to cheat herself?

She couldn't wait for "some last minute thing" to "snatch [him] away forever" to cheat again?

I remember a lot of the slang. Bought back old memories, some good some bad. Good read

That was pretty awesome. Thank you!

Good story, probably happened, and happens, too often. I’d like to have heard what retribution was served on good friend Brad. Love to read more, good writing.

Something tells me the story isn't over and I don't mean that you are mentioning the next title. I read some of the other comments but Jacky didn't get closure, she just got wounds reopened.

Really enjoyed this! Thanks for sharing it with us. 5 stars.

Left me feeling archaic!😁 I remember my parents reminding me to keep some extra quarters "just in case!" Good story, it did a great job of standing on its own.

When the glossary is longer than the story, there's nothing much that needs to be said.

Excellent short story but it certainly left me wanting much more. Jackie's situation is left somewhat unresolved. Of course that's pretty much real life! Would love to see a sequel addressing why Jackie tracked him down just to apologise. Since she's already married, was it just to clear her conscience? So many possibilities! LOL

Thanks for the great read!

Killian

Very good read. I enjoy the guy being smart enough to be introspective but not an asshole with his sense of honor and willingness to burn the world. (Of course he did get some unspecified vengeance.) I wondered about the glossary but I guess most of the readers are young or weren't in the service. Looking forward to your future writing.

gamblnluck

Good. 4*. But lots (as in way too many) loose ends.

In the beginning, you said this a complete story. I hate being lied to. There is absolutely no story here. This was very boring.

With lots of threads to follow, a sequel or two would be appropriate. New wife's story, are they both going to stay in and become lifers, etc.

Six years in, Glenn should be wearing Captain's bars now, yes?

Thanks for this one, I look forward to your next offering (whatever the theme).

I'm looking forward to more. There is some serious depth here and a lot to tell.

Real good.....but too many old memories too.

He didn’t give her the closing she wanted. She deserved to live with that.

Excellent tale. Thanks for sharing!

So, you got to wonder what's the point of her stalking him all these years to "talk" to him. She's married and she's out in the bars hunting down the husband she cheated on. Woman cheat and then all they want to do is "talk" about their cheating to the guy they cheated on. Do they honestly think guys want to hear all the gory details about them fucking someone else? Do think think the guy will suddenly forgive then just to get them to shut up? When all's said and done its just about a bunch flimsy excuses to rationalize their bad decisions and behavior. No matter how much they claim to love the guy they cheated on the simple fact is their love wasn't enough to keep them from cheating in the first place.

...Make it much longer and fleshed out. This is really good, but it's actually an incident on the road to a story.

More with this character would be welcome.

Heh, payphones are 99% gone and cash is following them out the door.

Wonder if any of the young'uns would understand "Sylvia's Mother". Actual true story written by Shel Silverstein, a man of many talents.

☆☆☆☆☆

Wonderful as always!

In US Army a 2d Lt gets 1 gold bar. A promotion to 1st Lt means a single silver bar. Capt is 2 silver bars.

Why two gold bars?

I agree with LH_07, your obviously very talented & its difficult to understand why you are messing about with this titbit?

Looking forward to your next posting hopefully there be a bit more meat on it.

Seems like you must have been in ‘Nam, based on the realistic manner this story is told. It certainly brings back bittersweet memories of my time “in country” as you describe it. And more importantly, I remember coming back to “the world”. I think my fiancé at the time had been faithful...but don’t know for sure. Anyway, we’re still married 51 years later. Thanks for sending me on a trip down memory lane. Definitely five stars ⭐️ for this one!!

Two Gold Bars... one on each shoulder. 2LT, for everyone except the Navy and Coast Guard, where it's a LTjg. Also known as an O2.

Before I get to the second paragraph ...

Yes, the US Army, Navy & Air Force give a new lieutenant two gold bars, but it is ONE bar for each side of the uniform (collar or shoulder-board.) Much later (for very few) there are six silver stars for a Lieutenant General ... three per side. BUT nobody would refer to those ranks with anything but what is showing on one side.

Back to the story, now with considerable trepidation.

Now this is complicated, so please pay attention.

Yes, there is one gold bar on One of his shoulders.

But, how many Total shoulders does he have?

Therefore, how many gold bars does his Body present.

Not too fast now. Take your time to count from one to two.

Well done!

Samson

Good Start

(despite the ‘couple of bars.) I immediately thought it was a set of railroad tracks (Captain) until I hit ‘gold’. maybe a Jr. Captain.

Good story

5Stars for this short, tight well-written tale. Thanks for not dragging it out.

To anon: Why two gold bars?

One bar worn on each side.

One for each epaulet on the Class A greens?

I'm not entirely a fan of the protagonist - as written, he is mostly full of himself. In later work, perhaps something of what motivates the Elizabeth character to stay with him?

However, also from a society outside my experience (military of most kinds), and so my opinion of anything more would be misplaced.

Good luck, and I'd read any continuation.

Green-something

1. 2 Gold bars, one for each collar tab (for anony who questioned it)

Good start, I could see it as the beginning, but it was a good incident in a life story, not an endall story.. hope to see more.

Definitely needs a follow-up. Accurate enough to bring back my own bad memories of Jody.

"she's married" ... the subsequent interaction made me think "Jackie and Leslie are married?"

Green-something

Anon, I believe he is indicating that there is a good bar for each shoulder, this two gold bars.

A master craftsman practising his trade. 5*

But would have liked for Leslie to have finished the explanation of why Jackie was stalking him in a bar after all these years and after she’d remarried. Guess I’m slow - what was her reason?

Thank you for that slice of literary excellence. Well written quality short tale that I'm sure we will see a lot more of...hopefully😁

the story about wifes cheating back home is very pass. TK U MLJ LV NV

I liked it.

Not the war part,

but everything else.

4 out of 5 from me.

At best it leaves a lot in curious and interesting questions unanswered. At worst it looks like a copout from an author who lacks the wit and imagination to construct what would be a logical and believable sequence of conversations and actions following the suspicion that your wife had become a cheating slut.

It could have been just making out. He might have blackmailed, raped, drugged, or somehow induced her, we'll never know. And neither does he. He just comes off as impetuous, short-sighted, and maybe not very intelligent. What does it hurt to let a liar and a cheat confirm that she is a liar and a cheat? That should make getting over the failed marriage that much faster and easier.

The ex wife, now remarried, tracking him down to . . . what? She is still the same selfish self-serving bitch she was when she cheated. She wants what she wants, and she doesn't care what pain her wants cause him. Hope her current husband is OK with being a prop and facilitator for whatever next she thinks she needs, or deserves, to make her feel better. Its all about her.

So, a good plot idea but a clumsy execution. Anyway, thanks for the effort.

So if she was married and he moved on why did she feel the need to track him down for a talk? Just to clear her mind?

Two Gold Bars are one for each shoulder.

I had heard about guys like Jody before I enlisted and went to Nam so I made it a point not to leave anyone home. And yes I enjoyed the boom-boom girls, but also I wasn't attached. FIVE*****

Not bad so far thanks.

2 gold bars is 1 for each collar, LHS and RHS.

See title

This was very good but would have been better with more development. How long had they been married? Why marry before going to war? Did he have a clue before going home? Why did his ex track him down years later even though she was married? She didn't add anything to the story but she thought he was cheating too.

I gave you a 4 and appreciate your work.

reasonable man

One incredibly minor thing that has nothing to do with the story, but rather the glossary. I'm an old DLI-trained VietNam 98G. In northern dialect Vietnamese, the imperative of most verbs is formed by repeating the verb. "Di di" is not a corruption; it's the properly formed imperative of the word "go".

Great writing, great story!

Anon...

correct about the bar, But it's one on each shoulder.

or a Cap is a RR track(or sometimes a RR wreck)

No, he has it right. Two gold bars, one for each shoulder.

. . . he came back, in 1967, to a wife who had been faithful. Really? How does he know? Not to be an asshole, but while he obviously believes that, he has no way to absolutely know that, unless he had her locked up in a chastity belt. Ignorance is bliss.

Going to Vietnam as a 2nd Lieutenant should have meant coming back as a 1st Lieutenant unless you really screwed up.

Well constructed and nicely written. Waiting for what follows.

Nixon didn't stop the killing of farmers, Congress did. Could have been avoided had Truman told the French to knock it off in Indochina like Ho Chi Min asked in 1946, but Truman was a dumb shit.

Otherwise, meh. Jody did his thing.

He knows about which he speaks. This was not really a story. The MC came home, decided his wife was a tramp and left. Years went by and things got better. This needed more angst and misery, as well as emotion of any kind, to be a really good story. Thanks for posting.

I loved it.

Simply loved it - and want more.

And who said there were no new concepts out there.

Laughed my socks off at the 'Call Collect' in the glossary.

Don't ya hate it when you go into a museum and see something you saw introduced?

Keep em coming, Chas.

Having been in that guy's shoes... just a bit, I think the story was dead on. I didn't have to deal with a woman or wife dumping me when I returned, but I saw plenty of men who did.

Here is the catch-22 of the ex-wife coming back to apologize. She had moved on and remarried. She had been seeking him out for 5 years, not to get back with him, not wanting something from him, but to apologize and to try to make things right with him and try to alleviate his hurt and second guessing himself (that he had done something wrong, etc).

Being the cheated upon, you make yourself believe that the cheater is someone who doesn't care about you enough, who is willing to backstab you, who is devoid of decency and morality. But here the ex-wife seems like she truly cared about him, without wanting anything from him, which is the highest form of love. Which brings me to the idea that often when people cheat it's not personal at all. But if you're the cheated upon, it's very much personal. Interestingly, she probably loved him more than he loved her. Even if she hadn't had cheated she probably would have accepted him back knowing he fucked some prostitutes in-country.

I really enjoyed it and gave it 5 stars. I thought for what you wanted to do the length of the story was perfect, because you laid out exactly what you wanted concisely and precisely. Could it have been a richer, more fleshed out, longer story, for sure? But it was a snapshot to make your point about the betrayal destroying your perspective on the whole relationship. Also, that one of the shitty things about betrayal from someone you leave yourself completely vulnerable to is that you start second guessing your ability to judge people. And, for me at least, the third moral of the story is what I wrote above.

Punchy, direct, and to the point. I hope this didn't happen to the author but it sounds like it did and it left lasting wounds. Top notch writing.

“... in North Carolina and found a postcard with a cheesy picture of a cable car. ‘Glad you're not here. Mayor Alioto gave a speech about the street violence problem in Haight-Ashbury. Good that victims usually recover. Eventually.’

“Funny how buddies would think I cared about crime waves happening in a specific neighborhood twenty-eight hundred miles away. Almost like it happened to someone I knew. I smiled.”

Does this signify something important in the story? Something with Brad or Jackie?

Also, I too need an explanation of why Jackie was so driven to talk to Glenn. It’s been 5 years. She’s married now. You’d think she moved on. Something else (or something deeper) must be going on.

Also, missing reference to P-38 from C-rats. I know a P-38 is a WWII U.S. fighter plane. And also a German army pistol. Is fhat the reference? Or was there something specific to do with C-rats?

Otherwise, great story. Thank you.

5-stars

Right after Vietnam, with so many officers and senior enlisted in a shrinking army, increases in rank slowed way down. An E-7 could be an E-7 for several years, unless they were just plain outstanding or played the political games. An O-3 might stay an O-3 for 5-6 years.

Enjoyed your memory invoking tale. Fucking humidity and elephant grass. Room temp orange crush and blessed wump wump of the Hueys. Bars and under the table games. Constantly feeling so alive and scared shitless. Faces. The Stone's "Good Times, Bad Times" blaring in my head now. Appreciate the ride.

Did you read the glossary? A P38 in this case is a can opener. I have one in my camping gear. The line in the story was that Glenn knew he wasn't someone who could demolish a squad with just a can opener.

As for the passage you didn't understand: it's a wonderfully subtle description telling the reader that Glenn's friends beat the shit out of Brad.

You're right about promotions in that era. Of course, all the people commenting that he should have come back a first lieutenant and then been a captain and then whatever are ignoring the fact that the story only tells you his rank when he WENT to Vietnam. It doesn't mention it anywhere else. So all those 'shouldas' might actually be the case.

Chasten mentions this will be the first of a serial. I'm thinking there's more to this story than we know so far.

A p38 is a foldable can opener to be used on c-rations. I still have mine from 68, and still works. It was nice his friends let him know Brad had probably had an accident. Really look forward to another chapter. Have enjoyed all your stories.

While the story doesn't explicitly explain this, I took it as some of the MC's friends beat up Brad and they sent him a general postcard about SF (where Brad lived), with the message of "too bad about crime type of thing." Obviously, he was beat up pretty badly, but not too badly that he won't recover, "eventually."

The way Chasen did it is the way it would have been expressed to the MC, without detail, but if you're in the know you'd understand. Sort of like how Mafia bosses would talk where if you're part of the group it's obvious what they're talking about, but also gives them deniability if the cops intercepted the message. Sort of like Trump/Ukraine Biden investigation thing too. It's obvious what they're talking about if one knows the context, but gives the player(s) deniability that, at least, some people will buy.

I know this story is fiction but why do cheating wives absolutely feel they have to explain what they did and why to the cheated on husband?? From real life I've found this to be true in 90% of the cases. While I'm generally a BTB guy totally ignoring the wife and not letting her tell her story seems to be just as bad as any burning.

I enjoyed the story and most of the trip down memory lane. Obviously a lot of readers are Nam survivors. I have too many memories but fortunately I was a Wing Nut at Rocket City so I was better off than most of men who served over there. My favorite memory was leaving Hawaii as an E-4 and landing at DaNang AB as an E-5 by crossing the date line on April 1st. True story! To all of you who shared some of those fun times: Welcome Home.

You know what really pisses me off most is that she cheats , has love bite signs , and later on knowingly admits the guy she was fucking while he was at war hated him . That’s really insult to injury. He was a mans man walked away from a lying cheating pig . She feels bad and hopefully will have to carry that the rest of her life .

@lujon2019, are you saying Sergeants are short?

@sbrooks, are you changing pov? "She couldn't wait for "some last minute thing" to "snatch [him] away forever" to cheat again?" You don't know, you are not her.

Short, sweet, and simple. He did what was necessary, walked away from a cheating bitch.

Her rationale held no water especially screwing someone she knew hated her husband. A total waste of resources.

And all too common for military marriages where separation for many is the norm. I retired from the Army after 20, and still see this shit happening, especially with the back to back deployments the young troops are having to endure. Sad.

Good brief tale.

1 loose end bugging me... what was leslie going to say? She just wanted... to what? It felt like more than just wanted to say sorry. And if she's really her best friend, why did she leave her alone when she was in the ladies crying her eyes out. Sorry just felt like a lot of build up for nothing.

Thank you for the glossary, some of us weren't born when Vietnam started and were refused service on medical grounds before you ask. Shame some people couldn't be arsed to read it.

Oh yes...

Ass, okay

Asshole and asshat, I suppose.

But smart-assery? No, that can only be smart-arsery. 😁

Okay written, but jumped at times with no intro to new scene.

Eg. Why ex wife got snooty with her friend at the bar.

Why did she even track him down if she was already remarried the discussion was like she wanted them back together. Clearly impossible if she was married.

Where did Elizabeth come from? She just appeared, as though from under the table.

Not sure what value the war scene parts gave.

Some decisions don't require a lot of words.

@sbrooks: I had a friend who retired as Lt Col. He considered himself to be a man of integrity and honor, who always did the right thing. But he admitted to me that he was unfaithful while he was deployed overseas, and he assumes his wife was, too, but they will never ever admit it to each other. He doesn't want to know. His wife literally was his "reason to survive"; everything else, including hoochie girls, was a means to that end. So long as both partners follow--or don't violate--the same unspoken code, there's no issues.

It's illogical, yes, but that's how some families dealt with the separation. That friend served from '71-'94 so maybe it's a generational thing.

And— I guess I missed the P38 in the glossary. I know I used one in the Boy Scouts, but we just called it a can opener. We used that, or the one on our Boy Scout or Swiss Army knives. We’d ask to “use your can opener” for the P38, else we’d ask for to “borrow your pocket knife” for the knife.

As far as rank progression — during the war rank went up pretty fast. At least as enlisted you’d get a stripe about every year. But I heard after the war, things slowed way down, at least among the senior NCOs. You could be an E-6 or E-7 a looong time (and an E-8 even longer). I knew a SF NCO, who at the time I met him in ‘82, had been an E-7 for about 4 years. And I know in the late ‘70s rank progression was pretty slow within the Navy officers (though that doesn’t necessarily mean it was the same in the Army, Air Force, or Marines), ESPECIALLY if you weren’t an Academy graduate.

I can understand cutting and deleting parts that don't work. I'm grateful you kept this part. It's very powerful. The primary character is too good to put down. Sadly, so is the ex. Americans don't seem to understand the power of a skilled seducer, over a naturally submissive woman.

You nailed the story,and as someone who got a Dear John letter over there it brought back some memories. I'd like to see some more about these characters.Thanks

You nailed the story,and as someone who got a Dear John letter over there it brought back some memories. I'd like to see some more about these characters.Thanks

Good story. I smiled at the glossary at the end. I hated the class A uniform. That shade of green was horrible. I'm glad to hear that they're going back to the WW2 style color scheme, always thought they should have kept it. The Marines kept their uniform without changes, I think. The other thing I hated about that era's uniform was the ball cap we wore with our fatigues, (At least in Germany.) Damn thing was a perfect hemisphere unless you crushed it down. Never should have got rid of the old patrol cap - except for what the old timers called the Ridgeway cap. apparently that was an abortion. Anyway. thanks for writing it, I'll keep my eyes peeled for any continuation.

Give us more from these characters. I’m hooked, so more please!

sbrooks, always there to comment on the obvious

This is my story, except I wasn’t married, and didn’t get an apology either. Never spoke to her again for eight years, and I asked her for 40.00 on pump four. Great story.

I still have my last p-38 on my key chain

I thoroughly enjoy this author's stories. But on this one I cannot decide what to score.

I am confused by the bar scene where Jackie meets Glenn after 5 years. He's aware that she has been stalking him trying to make contact. But has made it crystal clear to all his friends that he wants absolutely no contact with her.

What is her motivation? To apologize? Why would she think that he would care about her apology after all this time. No, her motivation was to alleviate her guilt. It was strictly selfish. But didn't she risk Glenn saying that he still hates her? Yes, but that would mean that he still has feelings for her. They may be negative, but she is still affecting his life. Could she be hoping that she could leverage his "feelings" into something positive? Or maybe she was hoping that his continued emotional attachment to her, negative though it may be, was some sort of revenge? After all, she's married now. She's moved on. But he would be wallowing in the past.

Based on her "crying her eyes out in the Ladies room", revenge doesn't appear to be the motive.

My thoughts also turned to Jackie's current husband. Does he know that she's been attempting to contact Glenn for five years? How would I feel if my bride had this compulsion to meet with her ex five years after their break up?

If the husband knew wouldn't it be likely that she must have explained why she wanted the meeting? He would then know that she cheated on her ex while he was in Nam under enemy fire, risking death or permanent disability everyday while she committed adultery. Would you or I want to marry that type of woman?

I'm just befuddled by the whole scenario. I can't make head or tail of the author's goal.

Conversely, I fell in love with Elizabeth. The dialogue between her and Glenn is one of the best on the site. In a few paragraphs she demonstrates her love, loyalty, compassion, and absolute trust in his love for her. She's his friend and confidant as well as his lover. encouraging him to unburden his pent up emotions and deep seated sense of betrayal by his ex. A brilliant ending.

Don't we all wish we had a spouse like that?

Interesting start, wish there were more.