All Comments on 'A Fantastic Summer Ch. 01'

Very nice build up, not some quick to attack the young pool boy story. Looking forward to continued stories.

Good storytelling, written with a nice flow where we jump straight into the story while various details are communicated implicitly along the way, rather than stating them all up front as so many aurhors do here.

Some disturbing errors, though, like e.g. the classic 'ridged' dick.

Let the finnished text rest for a few days, and then read it aloud to yourself. You will then more easily catch trivial errors.

Looking forward to the continuation.

wow, good story. Dylan try hold, while Mrs. Napolitano being innocently hold.

Nice little story, well put together, but it is sprinkled with errors that any good word processing program would catch, which seems a little disrespectful to your readers. Here’s a few to start you off: Buongiorno, chaise longue, a vein is a blood vessel, you breathe when you take a breath, breasts jiggle, not giggle, you sunbathe, pH not PH, and a ‘dress’ not a ‘dressed’. The little discussion about ‘ass’ being an animal is not really an error, but the result of your Puritan ancestors wanting to use another word for ‘arse’ which they considered vulgar. Otherwise a very enjoyable read, and I agree with the other comments about how it nicely takes its time.

As long as we're at it, shear is as in torn or cutting. Sheer is see-through. But, very nice start - next, please.

Submissive males are such a huge turn off.