All Comments on 'A Hotwife Monologue'

Just another cuck wimp cum-eating story like so, so many before it. Meh!

sorry sucks Juan the wimp lover

Dang, that is one crazy/sexy woman... And while I think her "Gift" is really too much to swallow, if it works for them, have at it and ENJOY!! The monologue format kinda worked good for this story! Nicely done!!

Quite well done. Covers all the triggers of a cuck/hotwife tale for erotic husband humiliation and wife empowerment. Inevitably this couple will begin in-person observation/participation of the sex by the husband--and the "cleaning". Keep writing.

Would have ended much better if after it got the rubber from her he had the devorice papers to give to her in return and had a prenuptial agreement, which notably has an adultery clause in it. All he need was to have a DNA TEST ran on the sample. Lover cum and soon to be ex-wifes but not his. But has this shit storm stands hell no no real man would put up with this bullshit. On a ture sissy cuck would put up with this.

"Ever hear of punctuation?"

I can't get over how terrible todays first-time writers are.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I could have done without the husband eating the other guy’s cum, but as a whole, the story was pretty good.

The wife having the only perspective conveyed with no others input whatsoever seems to me a risky venture . I would think the story would feel incomplete and so one-sided the reader would be left without any indication of her husband’s feelings in the aftermath , but you wrote a solid story from start to finish and didn’t leave me feeling short changed and wanting . ( I guess you did leave me wanting - wanting to read more stories from you soon ) great first story

The problem with these types of "monologues" sans context/stage-direction is that they start fading quickly. The properly functioning theater of the mind is critical to the reader "seeing" what the writer is showing us. Without any other references, such as would exist in conventional dialogue (i.e. action beats, partner feedback, and dialogue tags) the reader's vision suffers badly. Soon, the words are all we see, and now the become a sound inside our head. Your writing became monotonous, and the interminable declarative sentences of "I-plus-verb" started to grate like nails on a chalkboard. For all we know, the second person in this scene is imaginary.

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You can obviously write, and I think you can tell us a story. This vehicle wasn't the best showcase of your talent. At best, this was a fetish piece aimed at a tiny sliver of readers. Kudos for using tags, which also says something about you as a writer. Now, show us what you can do.... fu' real. 2/5.

The theme fits the category - like a glove so carefully slipped into by the wife; a nicely scripted story. It needed some separation between dialogues that ran together, although not bad overall. Some setting of the scene at home when she returned would be welcomed as well. It is a bit drab and rather lacking in emotionalism.

I know you set this as a monologue, however, even so, a few descriptive words about how the husband reacts to her retelling of the events would have been nice.

"Honey, please, wipe that frown off your face, dear. Get some wine and glasses, then come back. Sit here on the couch beside me and I'll fill you in on what I did for you ... for us. My story will ease that troubled look. It's what you wanted."

"Now take his cum in your mouth. You like it, don't you? Yes, baby, swallow it all up! That's it, baby. I like that smile better than the frown you had earlier."

Something along those lines would give us some insight into the other character's feelings, even without dialogue.

Thanks for your contribution. The LW area is not one I usually read. So take my words with a few grains of salt.

No the cunt is not his anymore and it never will be. The cunt will continue fucking around and the cuck will enjoy every second of it. Like all pathetic cucks he will always be second in the cunts life

Loved it, more adventures please.

"Hello, cum dumpster. Have you met my attorney yet? He's got some papers for you. The movers already removed all of your shit to a run down, rat-infested storage unit on the bad side of town. Now, gtfo, skank."

A whore comes home to a willing cuck.

Well done. It might have been useful to have heard from the cuck husband, just a couple of lines near the end.

I enjoyed it. Good work!