A Perfect Christmas

"I wish I still could. Treasure them while you have them."

"I do. When did you last see yours?"

"Four years ago. Cancer took my mom, then my dad had a stroke two months later. I honestly think he died of grief. I miss them so much. Joey does too. I wished every day of my life I could have a marriage like theirs. They were best friends. They had disagreements all the time, but they never screamed at each other over stupid shit like my husband did, and dad would never in a million years try to hurt my mom. They treasured each other and built each other up every day. I tried to do that, too, at first, but all I got in return was criticism and threats. I thought something was wrong with me for the longest time. I would strive for perfection, but nothing made him happy. He would laugh when I cried. He always seemed disappointed in me. That broke me for a while."

Cody's pity face returned as he listened to me, and I decided to change the subject to avoid depressing him.

"Anyway, what's your favorite thing to do on Christmas?" I asked with a smile.

He blinked at me in confusion for an instant.

"Gwen, I want to hear what you went through. Why are you changing the subject?"

"I... didn't want to depress you or make you think I'm whiny."

He gave me a sad smile and shook his head.

"Right now, I think you're an amazing woman, and I want to know everything about you. You don't have to talk if you don't want to, but you're allowed to complain. Sharing pain is good for you. What happened over Thanksgiving that made you and your son run away from home? Can you talk about it?"

That question instantly made my stomach turn sick. I had been having nightmares about it for weeks.

"I'll try," I nodded and took a deep breath. "Um, it was Thanksgiving day, and I thought everything was going well. The house was spotless. I had been planning the menu for two weeks with Don's approval. That's my soon-to-be ex-husband. I got up at 5 am to start cooking the feast. His side of the family would be arriving at eleven. Joey's girlfriend, Gabby, was joining us as well. Everything was festive as people began arriving at the house. Don seemed happy as he laughed with his brother and sister-in-law. His mom and dad were there, too, enjoying their grandchildren. I was bringing out little appetizers and champagne for everybody while they waited for the main course. I was enjoying myself. Joey and Gabby were helping me in the kitchen. Everyone was happy. I thought it was going to be a peaceful Thanksgiving, but then Don came into the kitchen, wanting to speak to me alone. My stomach dropped. I knew I did something to piss him off, and I had no clue what it was. He backed me against the kitchen sink and held his champagne glass in front of my face.

He said, 'Why the fuck are there water spots on our most expensive crystal? Did you put them in the dishwasher like a dumb shit?'

I flinched as he yelled at me. I feared he would reach up and pull my hair again. That wouldn't leave any marks for his family to see. Joey had cleaned the champagne glasses for me the day before. I was busy preparing for the feast and didn't explain to him how to wash them. He probably did put them in the dishwasher, but I wasn't about to tell Don that and watch him go after our son for something so stupid.

'I'm so sorry, Don. I was busy. I didn't have time to wash them by hand,' I gulped.

'God, you are so fucking stupid. You probably chipped half of them. Why didn't Joey help you?' he demanded and grabbed a paring knife off the counter.

I gasped and leaned away from him as he pointed it at my throat.

'Joey was helping me. He's been helping me all week. It wasn't his fault,' I stammered.

'Sure it wasn't. God only knows what else you two have been destroying behind my back. You're both in deep shit now. Nobody ruins my Thanksgiving without consequences. If I discover damage on anything else, you better be out of this fucking house before I find it, or God help me.'

He practically spat in my face before he stormed out of the kitchen, and I was utterly terrified. He would hurt Joey and me as soon as his family left. I still have scars on my back from the last time he flipped out on a holiday. I went ahead and served the feast, pretending like nothing was wrong. I was able to get Joey and Gabby alone in the kitchen before dessert so I could tell them what had happened. We would have to escape while everyone was distracted. Gabby sneaked upstairs to pack two small bags for us while Joey and I served dessert. Then, while everybody gathered in the living room to relax and talk, we escaped with Gabby out the back door. We went to Gabby's grandmother's house to hide for a few nights and plan our next move. We've been running ever since. I miss Joey so much it hurts, but I know he's safe with Gabby's family. Joey was always an afterthought to his father, but he would draw his ire when he tried to defend me. Don enjoys hurting me. As long as I stay away from Joey, he's safe."

Tears dripped down my cheeks and into my coffee as I thought about Joey. Cody was staring at me with his brow furrowed and his fist clenched.

"God, Gwen... I'm sorry," he sighed.

"I'm not. Joey and I are safe for Christmas. I'm sure he misses me as much as I miss him, but Gabby will keep him distracted."

I quickly wiped my face and took a deep breath. I felt better after getting that horrible weight off my chest. Cody's brow hadn't relaxed yet. I knew my story upset him, but he asked for it.

"Gwen, when we finally get off this mountain, I'll help you and Joey take steps to keep yourselves safe. I've dealt with men like Don before. They think they're above the law. I like to remind them that they're not."

"Thank you, Cody, but I'm fine. I don't want you sticking your neck out for us. Joey and I have a plan and a good lawyer. I think we'll be much better off by next Christmas."

Cody frowned at me. He wasn't convinced. I'm sure I didn't sound convinced either. He let out a tired sigh and looked out the window, wearing a scowl. I could tell he was holding something back.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I wish you hadn't said that," he gulped.

He was suddenly fighting back a wave of emotion. I could see it on his face.

"What did I say?"

"You said, 'we'll be much better off by next Christmas.' The last time someone said that to me, they ended up dead before they saw another Christmas."

I sucked in a breath and put my hand over my mouth. My breakfast suddenly wanted to come back up.

"Shit, Gwen, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

I shook my head as tears came pouring from my eyes. Cody had seen my worst fear happen to someone else. I had been having nightmares about Don killing me for months. I knew he would do it if he got the chance. Nausea suddenly overwhelmed me. I was going to vomit. I ran to the sink and lost my delicious breakfast. It wasn't delicious on its way back up. Cody cursed and rushed over to hold my hair back. Once I finished retching, I washed the mess down the sink and drank some water. Then I leaned my head on the counter to rest. I was shaking like a leaf. It was cold in the kitchen, and my anxiety made my extremities feel like ice. Cody rubbed my back and asked me if I was okay. Then he coaxed me out of the kitchen and over to the couch in front of the fire. He sat me down and wrapped me in my blanket. Then he sat next to me and put his arm around my shoulder. He pulled me close and held me until the trembling stopped.

"Gwen, I know you're upset right now, but I have to ask, are you absolutely sure Joey is safe?"

I took a deep breath and nodded.

"Gabby's dad is a police officer. He knows what Don is like, and Don is smart enough to avoid their house. Joey isn't helpless either. He's six foot tall and plays college basketball. He'll be okay without me for a week."

"Thank God," Cody sighed and squeezed me a little tighter.

I sighed and snuggled into his warmth, feeling ten times better. Vomiting was worth the cuddling I received afterward, but I couldn't relax after what Cody told me. He knew someone in my situation that had died. I needed to know what had happened before my imagination ran away with me.

"Cody... were you friends with the person that died?" I whispered.

"I was. She was a good friend from high school. Megan Harp. Her daughter, Lucy, is still friends with Becky. We don't see Lucy much anymore. She moved to South Carolina to live with her aunt after her mom was killed. I begged Megan to leave that abusive drunk for her and Lucy's sake. But she didn't listen until he chased her out of the house with a baseball bat on Christmas night. She showed up at our house at one in the morning, bruised, bleeding, and sobbing. I called for backup and went to their house to check on Lucy and arrest her sorry excuse for a dad. Jason surrendered himself without a fight. It took everything I had not to bloody his nose as I put him in the back of the van. He only got six months for assault since he promised to go to therapy and rehab. Megan finally filed for divorce after that, but she stayed in contact with Jason despite my warnings. She wanted him to be a part of Lucy's life as long as he stayed sober. I have no clue why. She could have found anyone better than that piece of shit.

The week before Jason got out of jail, I had lunch with Megan to see how she was doing. I wanted to make sure she was still going through with the divorce and planning to keep her distance from him. She and Lucy were struggling financially after the arrest. I knew how tempting two incomes could be. Megan assured me they were fine and were in the process of moving into an apartment across town to be closer to her new job. I begged her to stay in a hotel until they could move. I even offered to pay for it, but she refused. She said I was overprotective. Before we left the deli, she smiled at me and said, 'don't worry, Cody, we'll be much better off by next Christmas.' She seemed so sure of it. She almost had me convinced. That was the last time I saw her alive.

As soon as Jason got out of jail, he went straight home, and she let him in. I don't know if he threatened her or if she had planned to let him in all along. She didn't answer my calls, and I couldn't do anything if no one was breaking the law. A week later, Jason cracked Megan's skull open with a hammer. Lucy showed up on our doorstep in tears that night, and I knew what had happened. I called for backup and rushed to Megan's house. The front door was standing wide open. I could see her body in the hallway. I ran in to see if I could help her, but she was dead. A second later, Jason rushed out of the bedroom and swung a hammer at my head. I ducked and shoved him backward. He fell into the wall and regained his balance, then he lunged at me again, so I shot him. He didn't get up after that. I stood there in shock for a moment, feeling utterly numb. Then I sat on the floor between the bodies until backup arrived. There was nothing else I could do."

Cody was silent after that. I could feel his heart pounding as he recounted the horrible memories. Mine was racing too as I pictured myself in Megan's shoes and Cody finding me on the floor with my head cracked open. I gulped and looked at Cody's handsome face. Tears were threatening to drip from his eyes. I quickly raised up and wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him. He let out a shaky breath, wrapped his arms around me, hoisted me into his lap, legs and all, and encased me in his warmth. I had never had a hug that good before. I had also never felt safer in my life. It was wonderful. Despite the terrifying story and my own trauma, my focus was purely on Cody at that moment. He was a kind and gentle giant, and he smelled wonderful. I could feel him shaking as his tears dripped on my shoulder. Knowing he was crying triggered my sympathy tears. I let go of his neck, wrapped my arms around his thick chest, and indulged in his comfort. It was heavenly. He took a deep breath and kissed my hair as I listened to his heartbeat. It was calmer than it was before.

We held each other for more than an hour. I could have easily fallen asleep on his lap, but I needed to pee after two cups of coffee that morning. I gave his chest another squeeze before I climbed off his lap and excused myself to the bathroom. He was eager to use the facilities after me. I was in the kitchen when Cody returned, eating another biscuit since I lost my first one.

"Feeling better now?" he asked.

"Much better. You?"

He smiled and nodded as he searched my eyes. It suddenly felt like we were best friends, and if anyone asked, I would say we were.

"Well," he began, "going back to your earlier question, what's your favorite thing to do on Christmas?"

"Hmm, I would have to say making shortbread cookies."

"I'm definitely up for that. What do we need?"

I smiled and ordered Cody to retrieve flour and sugar from the pantry while I retrieved the butter from the snow box.

"That was easy. What else do we need?" he announced as he set the ingredients on the counter.

"Um, salt and vanilla extract. Do you think you can find the vanilla for me?" I grinned and pointed at the spice shelf.

"Of course, I can. I have a secret weapon now."

He gave me a big smile as he stepped forward and stood in front of me. I raised an eyebrow at him. Then he bent down, wrapped his arms around my hips, and hoisted me off the floor. I gasped and leaned on his shoulder to keep from bumping my head on the rafters. I burst out laughing as he began stepping backward toward the spice shelf while saying, "beep, beep, beep, beep." The beeping grew faster as we approached the shelf.

"Whoa! Stop! I'm almost on the shelf!" I laughed.

"That would be cute. A realistic elf on a shelf. I should leave you up there for Christmas."

"Don't you dare," I warned, making him chuckle.

I shuffled through the spices and found the vanilla. I also found a jar of unopened cordial cherries.

"Ooh, cherries. I'm keeping these for holiday martinis. Lower me down, please."

Cody stepped away from the shelf and let me slide down his body until my feet hit the floor. I landed with his arms still around me. We looked at each other in embarrassment for a moment. It felt a little too good to be so close to him. I blushed and wiggled out of his arms so I could get to work on the cookies.

"Hey, Gwen, please tell me if I'm making you uncomfortable or if I'm touching you too much."

"I will," I grinned and waved him over.

He smiled and stepped over to the counter to see what I was doing.

"Alright, Cody, it's time for you to learn how to make your favorite cookies. This is everything we need. I'm going to stand back and give you step-by-step instructions on how to measure the ingredients and blend them together. Are you ready?"

"Ready," he nodded and pushed up his sleeves.

Cody was an excellent student. He had steady hands despite their large size. The trouble started when he got the ingredients mixed together and couldn't stop state-testing the dough.

"Cody, we won't have any cookies if you keep eating the dough," I scolded.

"Sorry," he chuckled.

He loaded what was left of the dough into the cookie press and picked out a heart disk. Then he punched out a line of heart-shaped cookies. Then he changed the disk and punched out a line of snowflake-shaped cookies. He was grinning the entire time.

"Are you having fun?" I asked.

"I am. Now I know the secret to all these amazing shapes. The cookie gun does all the work!"

"Yep. It's technically a cookie press and only works with shortbread cookies."

"That's fine with me. This batch is ready."

"Wonderful. I'll chill it a little before I put it in the oven. That helps the cookies keep their shape."

Half an hour later, we had a beautiful assortment of shortbread cookies to enjoy with coffee. We ate cookies and leftover biscuits for lunch. Then we relaxed on the couch in front of the fire. I snuggled against Cody's side, prompting him to put his arm around me.

"I've never had a snowy Christmas like this before, and I only live two hours south of here. The mountains make all the difference. Do you have heavy snow like this every year?" I asked.

"Maybe once every four years, and it's usually not this much," he said and looked out the window. "Damn, I think it's snowing again. I can see it falling through the gap between the drift and the porch roof."

"Yikes, we'll never get out of here at this rate. People are going to be worried sick about you, Cody."

"Nah, I radioed the station to let them know I had food and shelter before I left my truck last night. CB radios are the best method of communication up here. I honestly need to check in with the station today if I can get to my truck. Do you feel up for digging through a mountain of snow?"

I laughed and shook my head.

"We can try. It sounds fun, but I doubt I'll be much help."

"It will be an experience you'll never forget."

We relaxed and chatted for another hour before we decided to bundle up and tackle the snow. There were plenty of shovels and scraping tools in the utility closet for us to use. Cody opened the front door and led the way into the mountain of snow with the biggest shovel. I stood back and watched him for a moment. He was the sexiest snowplow I had ever seen. He formed an impressive canyon in a matter of minutes, allowing us to move forward off the porch. I did my best to pat down the walls of the canyon with my shovel to keep the snow from falling in on us. We were moving forward and up, creating a rough stairway to the surface. It was exhausting, cold work, but it didn't seem to bother Cody. Sixty pounds of extra muscle made all the difference for him. More snow was steadily falling around us as we climbed high enough to look around the yard. The air was silent, cold, and crisp and smelled of hardwood smoke. It was a winter wonderland in every direction. I could see the snowy pass where the trees parted in the distance. It looked surreal.

"Gwen, I can't find my truck!" Cody laughed as he scanned the snowy landscape.

"I hope nobody stole it," I giggled.

"I did leave the keys in the ignition," he shrugged.

I attempted to step out of our canyon and onto the snowy surface, but I immediately sank in past my knee and got stuck.

"Oh shit! It's eating me!" I laughed in a panic.

"Hold still. I got you."

Cody wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me out of the snow. My added weight caused him to lose his balance. He took a step back and lost his footing, then we both slid down the canyon. I shrieked as he pulled me to his chest for the ride down. We were both laughing as we slid to a stop on the porch. I was lying across Cody's chest.

"Well, you make a good sled, at least," I sighed as I raised up to look at him.

"That was fun, but let's not do it again. We need to pack down the snow so we can walk on it. Wait, do you have snowshoes in the cabin?"

"No."

We collected ourselves and our tools before we got back to work. We reinforced our slippery staircase before we started packing down a path toward the last place we saw the pickup. Cody had to use the handle of his shovel to find the roof of the truck. Then we started digging. Thirty minutes later, we had dug a pit all the way down to the back window of the cab. Cody opened the little square window and sent me through to turn on the radio and grab the mic since his broad shoulders wouldn't fit. I pulled the corded mic outside and handed it to Cody. The first person to answer our hail was the Morgan County Sheriff, Big Mike, Cody's dad. We wished him a merry Christmas and asked for a storm update. Another six inches of snow was expected to fall that night. It would begin melting the day after tomorrow as temperatures rose into the high forties. Cody assured his dad and fellow deputies that he was safe and having a pleasant Christmas, prompting more questions about me. We chatted for twenty minutes as the station mic was passed to a dozen different people. The last person to join the conversation had the thickest southern accent I had ever heard. I couldn't tell if he was drunk or just really hick. The smile that appeared on Cody's face told me he was a friend.