All Comments on 'A Red Headed Pussy'

Persistence pays off!

5

First off, I have to say I love the idea in terms of the girl in question being redhead. At the same time, the title immediately objectifies her, and pictures her and limits her exclusively a function of her sex. That's going to turn off some for sure.

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I certainly realize that a 750-word contest demands much from every potential author: you have to pick a topic narrow enough to complete in that frame; you have to focus all the details to not only make a coherent story, but make one that still complete. I certainly confess that at the very least the story is complete, in the sense that it reaches a conclusion. However, there are several issues that immediately arise from how best frames the events. First, it's obvious this star has heavily imbibed alcohol the entire night, with the exception of whatever time he was on the dance floor. Second, we don't even know this cheerleader's name, and to have the title and then his only purpose is to find out if the carpet matches the drapes... that's incredibly shallow. While it is assumed that of course your cheerleader may naturally go for the star of the game, it's not guaranteed; there's no prior connection that links these two; there's really no reason provided that she is going to say yes. The other limiting factor is that we're not given a year that this takes place. However, Jerry Lee Lewis began performing in 1949, so we can at least assume that this takes place between 1949 or later perhaps in the early 50s. Therefore the guy supposing that her carpet wouldn't match her drapes is completely absurd. She would have been totally natural, and maybe the only possible question would have been if she was normal or maybe neatly trimmed.

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For one thing, I would have suggested perhaps some type of title like "The Red-Headed Mystery," as that would have baited the reader to think it could have been regarding anything, and it would have been far more neutral in terms of not typecasting her to start with. Additionally, it's obvious the story posits that he got drinks free all night long; this means even after Maybe 30 minutes or an hour of not consuming anything, his performance is going to be severely inhibited. There's also the issue of both of them awaking the next day behind the church, but no one has caught them.. which is highly improbable... and neither of them has a hangover. It just leaves a lot unanswered, and really suggest more should have gone wrong then the story provides. 2

Red is a delicious color. Nicely written.