A Replacement For The Old Man

Mike barked, "Get the hell out of my bed!" Mary jumped out of bed crying and ran back to her room.

....

Six weeks later

Mike's phone chirped, "Hello," he answered. "Hey, how are you doing, Debbie?

"Yep, I am available. What do you need to do? Yep. Uh, huh? I'm available tonight--the faucet is leaking. I can take care of that for you. That tool will be with me. It's attached," Mike chuckled, "Around six tonight. Great I'll be there. Should I bring a tooth bush or do you have one for me? I'll See you tonight.

Mike turned to see Mary turn gray as the blood ran from her face. "Please, Mike, no," she begged.

"Listen, Mary. It's simple; we are now in an open relationship. You opened our marriage, and that's how it will be. I'm mad, and I don't give a shit. If you don't want me to move out, I will; if you want a divorce, fine with me. Your choice. Find your own fuck buddies. I won't be home tonight."

"Oh, by the way, I've had the kid's DNA test." snarled Mike.

"Oh God, what have I done?" wailed Mary as she fell to the floor crying.

Mike walked over to her and helped Mary to a chair. "Mary, I'm sorry I don't trust you anymore. I thought I knew you. But I don't know what to believe anymore. I got to go and get ready to see Debbie."

....

Mike was getting so many requests to help the local women with chores he had scheduled for two months.

"Mother!" yelled Kim storming into the house. Mary came walking into the den from the other end of the house.

"What's the matter, Kim? You ok?" asked Mary with a concerned voice.

"Mother, John, and I will have to go to counseling because of you," smirked Kim. "Thanks a lot."

Mary gasped as she placed her hands over her mouth. "Please don't tell me he thinks you're cheating."

"No. Mom. He just happened to stop by his Mom's house this morning. And when he walked into the kitchen, he was surprised. Dad had her bent over the kitchen table and banging away while she begged him to stick it to her ass.

"She looked up to see John staring at them. She screamed, "Get the fuck out. I'll be out in a few minutes. Can you imagine the visuals John suffered for the next thirty minutes from screaming and grunting going on from the carport? And then the dead silence.

"That man has seen war, Mom. But nothing had prepared him for that. We both have visuals that no children should ever see. We're both going to be scarred for life," chuckling to herself.

Mary sighed, "Well, that's going to make for awkward family get-togethers."

Kim continued, "John and I talked when he got home. The poor man. The number of family meals he ate at that table had many good memories over the years. The worst part is his old seat faces the spot where his Mom was being railed. Imagine those visuals of your mother doing anal stuck in your brain.

"After 30 minutes, his Mom walked out of the house, tying her robe, with the I have just been fucked look. She explained that she had known about your little tryst for about a month. And she was lonely since John's father had passed away.

"She found out quite by accident. She had stopped by the house one day to hear loud music coming from inside.

"She rang the doorbell, but no one answered. She was a little concerned about you, so she went around back. And she could see you being fucked in the kitchen through the door curtain.

"She knew from how Dad acted; he didn't know about it. So that was when she started trying to get him in her bed. But his Mom said Dad was always polite and turned her down. She knew he would eventually find out and waited for her opportunity.

"Marge saw Dad that morning when he showed up. He had told her he wasn't feeling well and did not know if he could get what she wanted done in one trip. He later showed up at her door, saying he was feeling worse and was heading home.

"She didn't know he had returned later that morning. It wasn't until she heard a scream that she knew he had come back. She found him unconscious at the foot of the ladder. She called 911 and tried to get ahold of you. When you didn't reply she called me.

"She hadn't realized until later when Dad refused to let you in the hospital, that he had found out about you two. So she decided to make her move on him again. She sends her thanks to you.

Mary snarled, "Fuck her."

"Don't worry, Mom, Dad, is fucking her for you. By the way, we're having dinner Sunday at 1. So I expect you two to show up.

....

Eight weeks later

Mike wobbled into the house after a night with Yvonne. "Mike, can we talk?" asked Mary.

"Yea, Mary. Give me a second to grab me a cup of coffee."

Mike walked over, grabbed the pitcher, poured a large mug full cup of mud, came back, sat down, and faced his wife.

"What do you want, Mary?" asked Mike.

"Mike, what about me?"

"What about you," he replied.

Mary gave Mike a look of desperation, "Please, I want a night with you. I fucked up badly, and I know that. But please let me back into your arms. Treat me like a chore. I want to remind you of why you married me. I won't ask you to give up the others. I just want a night."

Mike sat there, considered the pros and cons, and replied, "Alright, Mary. Let me look at my calendar.

Mike pulled out his phone and opened the calendar app. After scanning thru the dates. He looked up at Mary. It just happens I had a cancellation for not this Thursday but next Thursday. You want it?"

Mary frantically answered, "I'll take it." Mike started punching in the information. Mary smiled and informed Mike, "You better take a double dose of those little pills. You're going to need it."

The following Thursday night finally rolled around

Mary lay on the bed naked, waiting on Mike to get in. Instead, Mike climbed into the bed beside her and reached for her. Mary attacked him and started rubbing his soft cock gently with no response. She slowly kissed her way down to his crotch and then placed the flaccid member into her mouth.

She couldn't remember the last time she had a soft cock in her mouth. In the past, Mary would just wink at Mike. He got hard.

She worked on it for three minutes, and nothing happened. Then, finally, she looked up at Mike and asked, "Mike, what's wrong, Honey? You're not getting hard. What am I doing wrong?"

Mary, I want to ask you, "What's my favorite position? Mary sat thinking. "Don't you find it pathetic you don't know my favorite position after 43 years of marriage?

"You know why you don't?" She started to move her mouth. Mike cut her off. "Because you don't care. It was all about you in bed. You never reciprocated. You eventually got where you lay there and expected me to perform on demand."

"I hated it when you asked me, Do you want a blow job? You asked as if you were praying, and I would say no."

"Tell you the truth. You were pretty pathetic as a lover in bed. You sucked. You performed them as if it was a chore--no affection or caring about my needs. And God help me if I came in your mouth.

"If you think I'm wrong, tell me one idea for sex you ever brought to the bedroom. As I said, you loved romance as long as I was the provider and you were the receiver.

"Not anymore, Honey. If you want sex from me, you'll have to earn it and get no help from me. That means no cuddling, no romance, or attention from me to help. If you won't, I'll get all the sex I need and attention from women who want me and want to please me."

Mary sat in shock as her husband described her in bed, sobbing, "I don't know what to do."

"Maybe you should have chosen a lover with a tad more experience next time," Mike replied in a hateful tone.

Sobbing, "Please, Mike, tell me what to do."

Mike shook his head at the woman he still loved. But, of course, you can't stop loving the women you have spent close to 75% of your life with. But what do you do if you can't stand to look at her? "Mary, I can't tell you how. You'll have to figure that out for yourself. But I'll tell you what they do for me."

Mike looked at her, "It begins the moment I enter their house. They meet me at the door on their knees. Some let me do the chore they need doing. Trying to fix a leak under the sink on your back is tough while getting a blow job." Mike smiled, "But someone has to do it.

"Sometimes Yvonne will cook me dinner in the nude. She might be a large woman, but there is something sexy about a woman cooking naked with nothing on but an apron. And when that lady sits across from me, with her tits lying on the table, she drives me crazy.

"And Sarah. Little Sarah loves BDSM. " Mary's eyes grew wide, "She loves to be tied upped and forced to comply with my every whim. And Marge, what a slut. She meets me in a garter belt and hose with CFM pumps at the door.

"What in the hell are CFM pumps?" asked Mary.

Mike smirked and replied, "Come fuck me, shoes. And not to mention, when I walk in, she hands me a tube of KY jelly. That woman loves anal.

"Mary, why do you care so much now? When was the last time you asked for it? The one time you did, I didn't get hard for the only time in the past ten years. You only tried for less than a minute. You never kissed me, you never licked it, nothing."

"So you found another man, well almost a man, that met your needs. You could lay there, he would do all the work, and you got what you needed. But I do have a question for you, Mary."

Mary looked at Mike in anticipation. "How come you never talked dirty to me?" Mike rolled over on his side with his back toward her. Mary sat there in shock. Then, finally, Mike said, "The only reason we aren't divorced is I'm tired, and I'm too old to start over."

....

The doorbell rang, and Debbie opened it to see her lover's wife standing before her. Debbie smiled, "Well, Mary, what a pleasant surprise. What brings you here? Mike is not here tonight. I think he is with Sarah.

She asked in a meek voice, "Can we talk? Please, I need help. I don't know anyone else I can turn to. Please help me."

Debbie looked upon a face stricken with fear. Debbie stepped aside, "Come on in, Mary."

"Thank you," replied Mary with a half-smile.

"What can I get you to drink?" I have beer, Coke, or wine. Come on, Follow me. Let's sit in the kitchen.

Mary replied, Thank you. "I'll take a beer if you have one."

Debbie reached into the fridge and pulled out two Michelob Ultras. Screwing the lids off, she handed one to Mary and took the other, and sat across from her at the table,

Mary took a drink. "Ahhhh. It's been a long time. I drink mostly wine now. This is Mike's favorite beeerr." Mary realized why Debbie had that brand on hand.

Debbie smiled and replied, "Yes, it is." I make sure I keep a case in the fridge for him at all times. So I'll keep him happy, and he makes me happy. He likes the way all his women wait on him for a change. So he feels valued and appreciated.

"Men ask for so little. But they can give much without asking what they can get out of it. Mike worked hard all his life to finally realize it wasn't enough to keep you happy. He sometimes felt as if he wasn't ever needed.

"I find it funny about us modern women and how we act toward men. When a man goes out and works hard and improves himself, puts in the extra hours to make more money and advance himself, he does it with the intent of providing for a family,

Or if he is single. Once he realizes he is successful, he looks around and says to himself, "I want a family that I can now provide for and share my life and my bounty. And a woman that loves me." So everything he makes is for the benefit of his family.

You never hear the modern woman say that. You hear once they reach the top; I don't need a man. I can take care of myself. I don't need anybody." And men are supposed to be the assholes."

Mary sighed and dropped her shoulders in defeat." I've tried everything to get him back in my arms. But you're right; I don't know what to do. I've never had to do it before. I never liked giving blow jobs. The thought of anal is disgusting."

"Mary, your problem is you have nothing he needs. He is getting everything from doing chores. I don't particularly like anal. But Sarah loves it. Between all his women, he gets anything he wants.

"Another thing Mike worries about is that he has very little saved for retirement. Everything he made went into the property you two own. Mike thinks the property is worth a million and a half dollars. He explained to me every time he got extra money, he had it spent on remodeling the house of something the kids, and you needed.

"His retirement is sweat equity in your property.

"He is looking at working until he dies. He worries when they revalue the property, the taxes will go through the roof, and he will lose the family home.

"Mary, I can't accuse you of something I can't back up. But from what Mike told me about what both of you made income, something doesn't add up.

"Mike told me you paid the bills and handled all the finances for the home. He also informed me you are an accountant for the railroad. And you have been there for the last 30 years. As an accountant, I can't believe you would have put Mike and your family in this position over the years.

"I added it up in my head, between your salary and no bills. And the fact that Mike has saved you hundreds of thousands of dollars doing the work around your home, you two should be swimming in money.

You're an accountant, and they are not known as spendthrifts. So you might want to use that to get back in his good graces. Also, do what he wants to do instead of what you always want to do.

"Also, if you don't know what to do sexually, go online, read some books, and learn new skills. Hell, watch porn. Read and learn how to seduce a man."

Mary went home with a bit of hope now of fixing her marriage.

....

Sunday, Mary saw Mike pull out of the barn into the driveway in his 1974 Chevrolet Silverado half-ton pickup truck. Attached to the hitch was his 1970 Sears aluminum flat bottom boat with its little two-stroke, Mercury, 25-horsepower pull start motor. He had purchased it back in the early 80s. Both used.

As Mike pulled out, the light boat rattled and shook as the trailer bounced up and down on the frame. The old truck rumbled from a rusted-out muffler as Mike gunned the motor. Mary smiled; she had a plan.

Mary walked out to the old barn Mike used as his man cave. She hadn't been in the barn in years. Mary thought about happier times when she and Mike would go to the loft and make love before they married. She always suspected Mike's Dad knew but never said anything.

Looking over the top of his workbench, she found what she was looking for and took a picture with her cell phone. Then, she returned to the house to do a Google search.

Next Saturday morning, Mike returned from his nightly adventures with another of Mary's friends.

Walking into the house, Mary yelled, "Mike can I talk to you for a minute? I have something I'd like to discuss with you."

Mike walked into the kitchen, "What do you want?"

"Please sit down, Mike. I have something I need to tell you. Of course, you'll be pissed, but I think I can make it up to you."

Mikes eyes lids raised in curiosity, and he twisted his face waiting for the shot.

Sighing, "Mike, I'm sorry. And not about the other. Well, I'm sorry about that also. I talked to Debbie the other day. She's finally made me see how I've done you wrong over the past 30 years. I felt you weren't doing your fair share and pulling your weight as far as the income goes."

"I never quit loving you, but somewhere inside, I always thought that the man should earn more money than the woman. Well, I decided since you weren't," taking her fingers and doing quotation marks, 'making your fair share.' "I would take the difference in two salaries and keep it for myself."

Mike snarled, "What the F....."

"Please, Mike, if you let me finish, then you can hit me." Mike calmed down and listened intensely to what she was saying.

"You trusted me with our money and how I managed it. Then, with that trust, you just signed our tax returns and never examined them, so I played you."

Mike's face was turning red, "Mary gave Mike a solemn smile. "Let me finish, and then you can hit me."

Mike snarled back, "I just might take you up on that."

Mary smiled, "No, you want. But you should. Let me finish."

"Somewhere along the way, I failed you. I never viewed your contributions to our home as a monetary contribution. I cleaned, cooked, and performed my loving housewife duties. But then I expected you to help with housework. Help take care of the kids. Do the laundry and the dishes. You cooked and bbq out. So we pretty much split the duties in the house. You had to; I worked full time.

"But then I realized you took care of the cars, cut grass, and cut wood for the winters and fixed any problem with the house that popped up. These were seasonal-type duties you had. I never help with any of them. That was man's work. Then, of course, as kids got older, the kids helped. But then they and you helped me in the house.

"As I started making more money than you, I felt you weren't pulling your load with your salary. I made more, so I deserved more. So that is how I justified hiding money but kept it in our names. You just didn't know about it.

"Debbie made me realize we were a team. You had skills that were just as valuable as my degree. We have remodeled this house twice over the past thirty years. New Kitchens and Baths. Removed walls. New siding, roofs. And you did that yourself, Mike. No one helped you.

"Not only did you do all that extra work, you still helped me with the kids and housework and took care of the yard and the property. It makes me tired just thinking about all the work you do. And you never complained.

"So, where am I going with this? You're tired, you want to retire, and you are scared that we will end up in poverty with the way I go through the money. If you dumped my ass, we might lose this place. This place has been in your family for over 200 years.

"I will never allow this to happen, Mike. I just had this place appraised, and it came back with a value of around 2.3 million dollars. That includes all the acreage. With the city moving toward us, real estate investors would love to get a hold of this property."

"That's a problem, Mary," complained Mike. "They'll keep raising our property taxes until we can't afford it. Then, I'll have to work until I die."

Mary reached across the table and took his hand. "Mike, this is why you need me a little. I checked, and we can keep it zoned as a farm. And have the lake area zoned as a state wildlife sanctuary. That will keep the property taxes from being raised. We can always put this property into a trust to protect the kids.

"Mary took a manila envelope and slid it over to Mike. I went to see a lawyer last week; He drew up the paperwork for me to sign away my l rights to this property. That should remove your worry over splitting this place up if we divorce.

"Plus, this is all my babies' home. I want to make sure it stays in the family."

Mary slid over a second envelope. "This is your's Mike. Inside you will find a brokerage account. I set it up years ago when I took money out of our account. It was the money I thought I was owed. But you will see it is in both of our names. If something were to happen to me, you would have needed access to it."

"I invested in safe investments: blue chips, T-bonds, and tax-free municipals. One thing I failed to remember was when we made income from it; the taxes came out of our accounts. So not only was I hiding money from you, I took the money you made to help pay the taxes.

"You trusted me with finances, and I failed you. But I didn't steal from you. Over the years, with a return of around 5%, it totals around $840,000." Mike's mouth dropped.