A Roll in the Hay

The following is a story about a smug misogynistic guy getting fucked by a trans farmhand. I do my best to make the protagonist unlikeable to justify what happens to him, also this scenario is largely non-consensual. If either of those things bother you, maybe skip this one.

Also, it is worth noting that this story features some intentional typos to represent southern dialect and a drunk person's slurred speech.

***

It was almost too good to believe. Mr. Johnson was paying 3 times what Bryan had previously earned at his last farm job, doing the same exact work. Bryan was thrilled to have this opportunity, he really needed a win.

Bryan had recently dropped out of college after being kicked from the football team. He had previously worked on a farm in high school, this was basically the only kind of work available in his middle-of-nowhere Oklahoma hometown, which he had returned to after dropping out of college, much to his parents' frustration.

Bryan was 21 years old and had a runner's physique, useful for his time as a running back and on the track team. He stood at 5'11, and was proud that was taller than most people, even if not by much. He was never the bulkiest guy, but he was definitely toned all over. However, he had recently started letting himself go a little bit, a consequence of the slump he was in post college. His once firm rear had started to grow plump, and a smooth belly now covered up his once visible six pack abs. He told himself he would get back into shape once he was really got back on his feet.

While Bryan was proud of his body, and it had helped him win over many pretty girls in college, he had always been sensitive about his face. He had never been able to grow facial hair, even though he had always dreamed of having a full beard, as he saw it as the epitome of manliness.

No, his face was very boyish, with soft features, pouty lips and a dainty upturned nose. He was always more likely to be called cute than handsome and it frustrated him.

Bryan had landed this high-paying job under unusual circumstances.

Mr. Johnson had previously had a full staff of strapping young men, but last month they all walked off the job, refusing to say why. This left Johnson scrambling to find new workers to tend his farm, and paying very handsomely to find help ASAP.

It was something of a mystery why all Johnson's workers had quit at once, as the lot of them were completely tight lipped about it, fear in their eyes. Rumor had it that shortly before they walked, Johnson's farmhand and notorious womanizer Georgie Polk had been seen with two black eyes and a broken nose.

Not that any of that was Bryan's business, he benefited regardless.

Once he arrived at the farm, Mr. Johnson showed him around. His job included tending chickens, milking cows, and tending to the fields. As Mr. Johnson showed him around, Bryan noticed a burly woman driving a tractor back from the fields. She flashed a friendly smile at the two of them.

"Who's that? I thought all your workers walked." Bryan asked.

"This is Bonnie O'Bannon, She's been working on my farm for going on 7 years now, She's the only one that didn't leave, and for that I am eternally grateful. Hiring her has proved to be one of the best decisions I've ever made." Mr. Johnson proclaimed.

The burly woman had parked the tractor and stood from it to her full height. She stood at a towering 6'3. She had biceps almost as big as Bryan's head and muscled legs that could crush a man's head like a sparrow egg between her thighs. Overall she was built like an Olympic athlete.

Bryan felt a pang of inadequacy next to her imposing stature. He scolded himself for feeling inadequate compared to a woman. The idea was absurd to him, but he couldn't deny she was an impressive specimen, and there was also something very attractive about her muscled form. He also scolded himself for these thoughts, "Damn it Bryan, quit it with that gay shit!"

The woman approached them, smiling brightly. She had striking, icy light blue eyes, like a husky. Brilliant gold hair messily hung down to her shoulders, she brushed a few strands from her eyes. Her hair was several degrees brighter than Bryan's own dirty blonde hair. She had a powerful jawline and freckles were flecked across her nose. Her face was well tanned from working in the sun all day.

"Damn, how is such a butch woman this beautiful?" Bryan wondered.

She reached out a powerful arm for a handshake. "Bonnie O'Bannon, pleased ta meetcha!" She said. She had a bright feminine voice with a thick southern accent, the kind of a working woman. "Bryan Davidson, nice to meet you as well." Her large hand engulfed his own. Her grip was very strong, and somewhat painful, as if she was trying to wrestle him into submission with her handshake. Bryan wondered if he had done something to upset her, but her smile and cheery tone reassured him.

"It's nice to see Johnson's brought on a strapping young man to assist me out here." Bryan felt annoyance at the notion that he would be the assistant to a woman, regardless if she had seniority. "Yessir, it's been a minute since we've had anyone else workin' out here."

Johnson said "Well Bryan here's still got to learn the ropes, so I'm still showing him around."

"But I learn quickly!" Bryan interjected, his insecurities flaring up.

Bonnie gave him an amused look.

"We'll see." Said Johnson "And if you do in fact learn quickly maybe we can get you started tomorrow."

For the rest of the day Johnson showed him the basics, mostly stuff he was relearning.

As he worked, He thought about that Bonnie woman. There was something inexplicably enchanting about her. Every smile she gave really made Bryan's heart skip a beat. The casualness of her speech warmed his heart. He had to have her, and he knew exactly how to do it. He had won over his fair share of women in the past, regardless of their reluctance, and she would be no different. Maybe he'd even turn her into his submissive little girlfriend, maybe he'd even become her boss. He smiled at that, and for the rest of the day continued thinking horny thoughts of dominating Bonnie.

At the end of the day, Bryan got in his truck and drove home. At the dinner table he boasted to his parents and younger brother, Wade, about his new (relatively) high-paying job and what his day was like. He also described the beautiful woman working there and of his plans to woo her. Wade's brow furrowed as he said this. After dinner, Wade approached Bryan and said "Hey dude, I need to tell you something. So you mentioned that woman at work? Was her name Bonnie?"

"Yeah" said Bryan.

"Well I gotta warn you, I heard from Eugene that she's a futanari."

"A Futa-what? Dude I told you to stop spouting that weeb shit. That shit is cringe." Bryan said l absentmindedly as he looked at his phone.

Wade gave Bryan an irritated look. He was about to explain what "futanari" meant, but he stopped himself. He thought back on all the times Bryan had mocked his hobbies, his friends, all the times he had humiliated him in public. Maybe Bryan being surprised by this is exactly what he deserves.

"You know what, you go for it. Don't let me stand in your way." Wade finally said, a smirk growing on his face.

"Great I wasn't looking for your permission, but whatever." Bryan replied dismissively.

-----

The next day Johnson informed Bryan that he would be taught by Bonnie from now on. The familiar irritation came back to Wade. He could remedy that in time.

He approached the barn searching for Bonnie. He gasped as he saw her exit the barn carrying two square hay bales, one on each shoulder. Sweat ran down her flexing biceps, veins popping from the exertion. Her face was intense, focused squarely on the task at hand. He could see her golden hair glistening with sweat. He could feel his dick start to stiffen.

She put the down bales and upon seeing him a pearly white smile formed across her face. "Well hey there sugar!" She said in a chipper voice. Her pale blue eyes made him melt. The contrast of the buff woman and friendly attitude was really doing it for him. His erection moved to full mast.

"Oh... hey there... Bonnie", he sputtered. He stood at an awkward angle to hide the tent in his pants. In his mind he again considered whether loving those muscles made him gay.

"Well I reckon we ought to get started!" She said happily.

Despite the rocky start, the rest of the day proceeded smoothly. Bonnie proved to be great company, always affable, even telling some jokes that got a genuine laugh out of Bryan. Both of these were traits Bryan would usually consider inappropriate for a woman, but being with her, he found himself not thinking about that. Throughout the day he flashed her smiles that melted women's hearts in the past and did his best to put on some charm without giving away what he was after.

By the end of the day he felt confident he had made a great impression and was ready to make his move. So confident was he, that he got straight to the point. "Hey Bonnie, would you like to have dinner with me sometime? And maybe afterwards I show you a good time..." He gave her a wink and did his best to give her a smoldering look.

Bonnie cracked a sideways grin. "Heh, that's funny. Sorry, hun' but I'm afraid you're barkin' up the wrong tree on this'n, if ya know what I mean."

Bryan was shocked, all those moves had worked on women in the past. To be honest he didn't know what she meant, was that some roundabout way of trying let him off easy? What did she mean by that?

Despite his internal confusion and disappointment, he put on a mask of composure saying "Uh, yeah of course, it's no problem at all."

"Well hey, I did have a lot of fun today, y'all are a hoot and a half!" She said, her cheeriness seemingly unaffected by the awkward encounter.

As Bryan went home that night, he continued to think about his failure. He went to bed thinking of how she'd said his flirting was funny. He stewed on the embarrassment, and decided that he would not let this go, he just had to try harder, even if it took months, or even a year, he'd win her over. With this thought, his smug confidence returned, and he shut his eyes for bed.

-----

Throughout the next month he grew closer with Bonnie, and her friendliness was steady, as if his rejected advances had never happened. They made a good team, worked well together, he didn't even mind her telling him what to do as his supervisor. He also found that she had a hilarious sense of humor! She frequently made raunchy jokes and they even developed a few inside jokes between them.

Throughout the month, Bryan began to develop genuine feelings for this woman. He'd never had anything like this happen. In college Bryan would sleep with the latest girl he found sexy and then they'd go their separate ways. He'd dated a few women, but he had found the experience boring. This was the first time that he'd really enjoyed the company of a woman, the first time he could see himself wanting to be with a woman long term. These were strange and unfamiliar feelings for Bryan, and he desperately wanted to do something about it, but he knew he did not want to make another move and risk fucking this up. He felt stuck and in unfamiliar territory.

Eventually one month rolled into two. One evening at the end of their shift Bonnie said to him "Hey Bryan, ya know, I've never really had a buddy like you, someone I could just pal around with." Oh God, the dreaded friend zone. Bryan only knew it from reputation. He was supposed to be the one that put people in the friend zone, not the other way around!

"Anyway, I've hidden some bourbon in Johnson's shed, and I was wonderin' if ya wanted ta join me in getting drunk off our asses?" Bryan lit up. This was his chance. Maybe she wasn't interested in him sober, but if he got her drunk enough...

He nodded in agreement to her suggestion.

After work, they said goodbye to Johnson, but instead of going home they made their way to a small shed on the far side of Johnson's farm. They each pulled up a wooden box to sit on and another to be a table. "This isn't especially romantic, but it is fairly private." Bryan thought.

She pulled out a couple bottles of Kentucky bourbon from beneath a loose board as well as a couple of shot glasses. She challenged him to a competition of shots, a mischievous twinkle in her icy blue eyes. "This is perfect," he thought. "I can hold my liquor better than anyone. She'll be drunk in no time." They each took a bottle of bourbon and filled their shot glasses. By her rules, the first to puke or pass out loses.

Bryan went first. He threw his head back and downed the first shot. The flavor was harsh and it burned his throat on the way down, but soon it filled him with warmth. From there they each took turns throwing back cheap bourbon.

After the fourth shot, Bonnie grinned from ear to ear, "Ya know Bryan I'll be honest with ya, at first I was worried you'd be an overly macho ass like Johnson's previous help, but I'm so glad to see you're not too good to drink with a female farmhand."

Bryan was conflicted by this, on one hand "overly macho" is a term he would proudly use to describe himself. On the other hand, he hungrily basked in her compliments of him, his obsession stoked by her kind words.

Opting to say anything to please her he said, "Of course, Bonnie!"

The fourth and fifth shots breezed by, but by the sixth Bryan was really starting to feel it. He was in a daze, but he held on. Bonnie smiled confidently, seemingly unaffected, but surely there was no way she could hold out much longer. By the eighth shot, the world was spinning, he had to hold himself upright. He didn't have much left, and yet she still sat upright, looking as alert as ever. "How are you keeping together so well..." His words slightly slurring together. "What can I say, a true genteel lady can hold her bourbon." She gave him an infectious grin and a mock curtsey. She took her next shot with her pinky up. Bryan started laughing, it wasn't that funny, but damn was he drunk. He took his ninth shot, still giggling.

A devious smirk crossed Bonnie's face. "Ya know can you believe that Johnson today?" She proceeded to do a goofy imitation of Mr. Johnson complete with finger under her nose to represent his moustache. Bryan started laughing, a deep belly laugh that only grew and grew. Bonnie continued to do the silly impression, really getting in Bryan's face saying "What's so funny?! Rah...Rah...Rah... Get back to work! Rah...Rah...Rah..." With Bryan already drunk out of his mind, he began gasping for breath from laughter. Suddenly he felt a churning in his stomach, he was laughing too hard, but he couldn't stop himself. Every new laugh sent a new wave of nausea until suddenly he bent over and puked his guts out. Afterwards he clutched his belly and continued to giggle between coughs.

"Welp! I reckon that's a win for me!" She announced proudly, her words not even slurred. "Thlat's no fair..." Bryan slurred, "yoouuu mlade me laugh..."

"Hey I can't help it if I'm a comedy genius." She said, holding her hands up defensively. Bryan cracked a grin.

In his mind, now was a perfect time to make his move, convinced there was romantic tension between them. "Hey do you want to go on that date nrow..." He said drunkenly "I'm like pletty charming ya know..."

An irritated look flashed across Bonnie's face, but it was gone in an instant, replaced by her usual smile. Bryan wondered if he had imagined it. "Well bless your heart... You're still on this are ya?" She said, her voice back to it's usual affability.

"Perhaps I didn't make myself clear before, I do not like men. I'm what ya call one of them homo-sex-uals" She declared, mispronouncing the word.

"Wrait... you're gay?" Bryan gurgled.

This was not what he wanted to hear. This was not how this was supposed to go. Why the hell was he the drunk one? She was supposed to be drunk, he was supposed to be putting the moves on her. Why the fuck had his life turned so upside down?! Nothing made any damn sense anymore!!

Something bitter began to rise up within him, and in his inebriated state, he had no self-control to stop it.

"You fuckin' tease!" He spat bitterly. "You're jrust another fuckin' degenerate! *hic* Just like all the rest these days!" The hate he kept buried within him continued to flow freely from his drunken mouth.

"Ya know... wromen shouldn't evren be working manyal labor jobs! It's urnnatural!" He raved, saying any cruel thing he could think of to hurt her the same way he felt hurt. "And speaking *hic* of unnratulal, women shrouldn't be in charge of men! It's like *hic* against the natular order or whratever... God, I can't believe I've been gretting bossed around by a woman all months, like a sissy bitch..." His voice trailed off for a moment as he searched his mind for another mean thing to say. "And... ya know what else, that body, that beautif- erm I mean unnatrual body... You're too strong, and ripped for a wroman..." He trailed off once again, His train of thought having completely left the station, nothing more to say.

At this point he looked up at Bonnie's face. In her pale blue eyes he saw a white hot rage. Her freckled nose wrinkled in an angry sneer. Then she closed her eyes for a moment, took a deep breath and for the first time said something without smiling. "That's no way to talk to a lady." She said flatly. "I think you should go and sleep this off." He stared at her blankly, head empty. "NOW!" she yelled, pointing at the door. He didn't need to be told again, scrambling for the door.

-----

Bryan woke up the next morning with a horrific hangover. He chuckled at the thought of seeing Bonnie at work with the same hangover. Then it hit him like a bucket of ice water, the memories of everything he'd said last night. "Oh man, I really fucked this up." He thought. "God, I hope I didn't lose her as a friend at the very least." He didn't remember exactly what he had said, but he knew it was bad and it was hateful. He couldn't bear the thought of never seeing her smiling face again. Her beautiful blue eyes. Her wonderful laugh. At the same time, he also couldn't bring himself to swallow his pride and take back what he said. The asshole in him was too strong.

When Bryan got to work, he sheepishly looked around for Bonnie. He had a half-hearted apology prepared, the kind of apology that doubles down on what got him in trouble in the first place. He entered the stables looking for Bonnie when suddenly he was surprised with a fond spank on the bum. He yelped.

"Heya there sweet pea!"

He turned to see Bonnie's beaming face.

"Bonnie I need to say somethi-"

"I'm gonna to stop ya right there" She interrupted. Her face became serious.

"Y'all were right last night. Everything ya said was true. I am too masculine. It is not okay that I'm your boss and I'd like to change that after today."

"You're kidding me right..." He stammered.

"No. No. I'm dead serious." She was completely straight faced.

"And most importantly, I can no longer deny my feelin's for ya. I think you're turnin' me straight. You're just too rugged and handsome. It does things to me..." As she said this she placed her large hand across his cheek.

This played to Bryan's insecurities masterfully. Despite how unlikely this turn of events, Bryan bought what she said hook, line and sinker.

"Perhaps after work you could meet me in the barn at sunset and teach me a little bit about how to be a real woman." She whispered seductively. She left her hand on his face, caressing him with her thumb.

Bryan was enthralled in her touch. He was getting everything he wanted! His words must have worked! "Of course they worked, I was right about everything wasn't I? I shouldn't have doubted myself. Women love a man who tells it like it is." He smugly thought to himself. Just like that he was off to the races stroking his ego. He was so caught up patting himself on the back, he almost forgot to respond.