All Comments on 'A Small Mistake, Big trouble Ch. 08'

Your story has developed well. Keep it going,

I was pleased to see that you addressed the "misstep" of chapter seven's gangbang. The comments regarding the train pulled on Kristi were pretty consistently negative, but you showed admirable class in assuring your readers that was a mistake that wasn't going to be repeated. Tim apologized and promised her reputation would not suffer. (Nice work in how he assured the silence of the participants. I don't know if that was your plan all along, or if the solution simply came to you after receiving so many comments. It was an elegant solution in any event.)

And I loved the lesbian seduction of Darlene by Kristi. (Or was it Darlene seducing Kristi?) The porn genre of a mature woman in a threesome with younger partners, especially FFM, is one of my favorites. I'm curious to see if Darlene would participate in a four-way with Kristi and Amy. She seems pretty handy with a strap-on. I am once more looking forward to seeing how your story progresses.

...you made a "Small mistake" in Chap.7 and compounded it with this chapter which created "Big Trouble". This mother would be run out of town and in prison after the orgy but this train wreck would've sealed the deal. I'd delete 7 on and re-write this. This was a great story that turned into a piece of crap. jahoo