Alice

She staggered, but managed to keep her feet with the aid of the door jamb. She moved silently to the bathing chamber like a ghost and he watched her, bile rising in his throat. He should have promised to find her a suitable match, not sworn to take her as a wife. Grasping little cunt.

Alice was sitting in the bathing chamber at the vanity when Leona came in, immediately dropping the dress and hurrying to her to hug her close. "Oh, Ally, I am so very sorry! I heard what happened. To think the whole time he was a prince! I wish I knew how to help you!"

Alice sobbed in her friend's arms, both of them on the floor until the door banged open. "What the fuck is taking so long?... You aren't even bathed yet! What the hell is this! Get up! You, get her bathed and dressed now, you aren't here to rise above yourself and feed her act with your commiseration! You have all of ten minutes to get her bath drawn!"

Leona scrambled up and began getting the bath ready, then swept the dress up and hung it, smoothing the wrinkles as Havilan stood and watched, glowering at the girl still on the floor. He slammed the door shut when Leona helped her stand and began undoing her buttons.

Leona whispered to Alice. "He is... very strict, isn't he? Not like Hunter... Ben at all. How are they so different? I am so sorry Ally, but I will be here for you as much as I can be. Do not fear. Come on now, let's get you washed and ready." Leona coaxed the almost catatonic Alice into the tub and bathed her before helping her out and getting her dressed in an ivory colored dress.

When she brought Alice out to the sitting room, Havilan was waiting impatiently, leaning against the wall.

"Her hair is still wet," he said with a scowl.

"Yes highness, it will take time to dry it. An hour at least as long and thick as her hair is. It is done up nice even so? Shall I take her back and lay it out to dry?"

"No. Alice, wake the fuck up and look at me. The plans are made and we will say our vows soon. You will not act a victim in front of the court, you will stand and say the words. Do you hear me?"

"I hear you," she answered hollowly, then looked back down to the floor, her eyes distant and sad.

He growled and closed the distance, taking her by the arm and dragging her out the door. He led her down to a small sitting room outside of the throne room. There were several men there and a few women who looked at her with disapproval and disdain. She did not notice. He pulled her to a group of men and stopped.

"So this is her?" a man asked.

She looked up at him and her heart pounded. "You look like Ben," she half whispered.

"Well he is my little brother," he said with an amused smile. "You are adorable, aren't you? Small, but still beautiful."

"She is a grasping little cunt and I am loath to go through with this. For Ben I will, but I am not sure I will be able to bed her after," Havilan spat.

Alice looked up at him blankly, then back at Malcolm. "Wouldn't it be close to your vow to let it be him instead of you?" she asked.

Malcolm smirked and opened his mouth, but Havilan spoke first. "You take issue with being my wife? Becoming queen someday? Isn't that what you hoped for?"

Malcolm smiled ruefully. "Also, my husband may not take too kindly to me marrying someone else," he teased.

"I did not know you were married," she answered dully, looking down again. "You look like Ben... and you seem kind like Ben."

"It was a private ceremony, on the field only two weeks passed. Hav isn't so bad, you just have to get used to his gruff nature. Hav, I think you may be wrong about her."

"I'm not. Let's get this over with. At least there will be a day of feasting and entertainment and I can get drunk. Come on, bitch," he snapped, yanking her along with him.

"Hav!" a smaller man said, stepping up. "Not so rough. Look at her. She is delicate and obviously distraught."

"She is faking it, don't buy into it."

The man took Malcolm's hand as he looked down at Alice worriedly.

Havilan dragged her to a dais and yelled, "Get this done, I need a drink!"

The officiant stepped onto the dais, looking around uncomfortably. Alice saw the king step up close to his son, looking down at her with an angry scowl. She looked down numbly and ignored the words the man in front of her droned out. When the time came, Havilan had to shove her to the floor to kneel, she had been paying so little attention. He had to bend almost double to let her kiss his ring, then when she stood and he kneeled in front of her, he made a distasteful face as he leaned over her hand, but did not press his lips to her ring. He stood hurriedly and they repeated the words, him angrily, her hollowly. When it came time for the kiss, he refused, saying he wasn't drunk enough for that yet.

Tears filled her eyes as he dragged her to the grand hall that had been set up for the feast. It was a small affair, smaller than usual after the attack the day before. So many nobles gone to check on their estates or didn't have enough notice to attend.

Havilan drank heavily, but it didn't seem to affect him much. He stayed angry and surly through it all as she stared down at her untouched plate. Malcolm and his husband Greggory sat close to her and tried to talk to her, bring her out of her sorrow. She gave them her attention, but could not bring herself to talk more than a few words.

Late in the evening, between entertainment acts, Greggory asked her how she met Ben. Havilan turned to listen with half an ear.

"I was in the stables... I spent most of my days there and in the kennels. He came in with Milly, a favorite sorrel of mine. We spoke and he led me to believe he was a groom and his name was Hunter."

Malcolm laughed at that. "We teased him with that nickname since he was old enough to pull a bow. He loved the woods and hunting. What then?"

"He asked me to ride with him."

"And you agreed?" Greggory asked. "To ride out with a groom?"

"Yes. He was so sweet and handsome and kind... and the animals loved him. He had such a gentle nature and lovely demeanor. We rode out every day... and then he kissed me... and took me out to the creek every day and we had bread and cheese for lunch almost every day and talked and stared at the clouds and held hands and talked about our dreams and our passions... and just everything."

"So you spent every day with him? For weeks? Still thinking he was a groom?"

"Every morning until after dinner when we came back. He'd led me to believe he worked the stables of an evening. Then... he asked me to marry him. I said yes... Finally... the day of the attack he told me his real name and who he was. At first I was upset he had lied... but then I realized he was like me. We love the same things despite who we were."

"That is so... Ben," Malcolm said with a sad smile.

"A sweet story," Greggory said with tears in his eyes. "And yes, so like him."

"He was the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me," she said sadly, her voice cracking. "I'd asked him not to go... to stay when we heard the screams. He made me stay and he left... I should have made him stay. Pleaded with him... something."

"It's not your fault," Greggory said gently. "He wouldn't have shirked his duty, no matter what. He came in the South gate though, where they were holed up. He made it through to our line, with an arrow in his leg, then took an arrow to his throat as Hav reached him. He did manage to lock the gate and keep them from retreating through that gate. He died bravely, professing his love for you."

Alice broke down sobbing again, burying her face in her hands and turning to hide from the crowd of people. Malcolm put a comforting hand on her back and Greggory stood and came around the back of Malcolms chair to kneel and hug her against him.

Havilan stood suddenly and she flinched, expecting him to yell at her again. Instead he called out loudly, "My wife is feeling tired and ready for bed despite the early hour. You will excuse us. Enjoy the feast and toast to us another night." He downed the rest of his mug, then turned to her, taking her by the arm and pulling her from the room. The room was silent as they left and Alice wondered if there had ever been a more somber wedding feast.

He pulled her into his rooms and straight to the bathing chamber. There was a white nightgown laid out and moments later, Leona hurried in. Havilan was silent as he left them in there.

Leona hugged her again when Havilan left, then began helping her out of her dress.

"I do not think I can do this," Alice whispered. "It was Ben's dying wish, but I think I would rather die and be with him than go through with this..."

"Hush now," Leona chided. "It may not be so bad? Here now, let me help you with your gown."

"Why is it parted like this?"

Leona looked at her in surprise, then shook her head. "I forget that you are from off. It is a blooding gown. The bottom stays beneath you when he takes you and the blood proves you came to him clean. The gown is kept as proof against a contested marriage or child."

"That is... vulgar," Alice said with a shudder.

Leona shrugged. "It is something only blue bloods do here. They have nothing like that back in Lonai?"

"No, but we are less treacherous there," she answered heatedly. She found herself getting angry now. Not at Ben, not really. He had asked for this, but it was Havilan she was angry at. Hateful hateful man.

"Come now, he will be waiting. Let's take your hair down. See now, isn't that lovely? Ally... perhaps if you please him well enough he will be less harsh? Do you know how to please a man?"

"No, and I don't care. I will not give him what I wanted to give only to Ben."

Leona sighed, but nodded in understanding. "You are ready then. Do you want me to walk you out?"

"No, it may upset him. I will do as I must... but I will be glad when he leaves tomorrow."

Leona gave her a last hug before Alice glided out the door in the gown that was gossamer and sheer in the front and heavier in the back.

Havilan stood up off the wall and barely glanced at her before motioning to the bedroom door. She walked to it with her chin high, but unable to stop the tears. She heard the door close behind her and she paused at the bed. It was ridiculously high. Too high for her to get into unaided. She stood with her back to him and she could hear him taking his clothes off.

She jerked and flinched when he set a hand on her shoulder. He said nothing, just took her under the arms and lifted her enough to get into the bed. She assumed that was what he was doing, but instead he bent her over it. As he pressed against her, she knew why the bed was so high. It was built for him to be able to stand and take a girl bent over his bed from behind.

More tears fell as he kept a hand in the small of her back and pulled the gown up, piling the skirts onto her back. She squeezed her eyes shut and shook from head to toe fearfully. When he had gathered her skirts enough to bare her bottom to him, he leaned over her and pressed against her. She squealed and tried to pull away despite having resolved herself to not fight. He said nothing as he moved his hand higher on her back, up between her shoulders.

With his free hand he reached down between her legs and his fingertips touched her.

"No!" she wailed and tried to struggle again, terrified now. She had told herself this must happen, but now that the time was here, she was not brave enough to allow it. "Please no!"

He did not speak or stop as his fingers probed her, touching and stroking. He pushed a knee between her legs, forcing them apart and slid his fingers down further to stroke and toy with the thatch of hair between her legs.

She cried out again and went rigid as she squeezed her eyes shut and sobbed.

His fingers toyed with her and moved over her mound, stroking and rubbing softly. When his fingertips found her bud, he rolled his fingertips over it and she gasped in shock.

"Stop!" she demanded. "Don't DO that!" she begged, panting rapidly and squirming. "Please! Stop!" she wailed as he moved his fingers faster and she felt pleasure rising. "Please!" she sobbed, trying to wriggle out of his grip.

He moved his hand and she let out a relieved sigh just before he landed a light smack on her bare bottom. She cried out in shock and his fingers went right back to her bud, rolling and pressing lightly. She went limp, defeated and crying into the blankets. As pleasure began mounting again, she closed her eyes and tried to imagine it was Ben. It was his fingers trying to bring her pleasure, his hand in her back holding her down gently but firmly. His body against hers.

She gasped when he slid his thumb through her slit and it glided through with ease, a slick wetness easing his path. He made a noise of appreciation, then eased his thumb into her opening.

"No!" she whispered hoarsely, then closed her eyes and tried to imagine it was Ben again. His thumb slid into her tight opening, meeting little resistance as the slick wetness eased his entry. He stopped when the pressure started to become painful, then eased his thumb out. It had felt good, she realized and she half wished he would do it again. The pleasure was mounting and she whimpered into the blankets bunched up in her fists. Her fear began to dissolve as her need rose and she let the bliss take over. It felt amazing, his warm fingers working so hard to please her and the thought gave her pause.

Havilan was trying to please her. Certainly, it was only to ease his entry, but why keep going if he had achieved his goal of exciting her enough to make her wet? She let the thought go as the ecstasy spiked and made her body sing with need. "Mmmmm," she moaned silently as she rolled her lips in and bit down on them to stay quiet. She could hear and feel his breath on her shoulder as he worked her and she knew he was watching her face. Part of her wanted to hide, but the larger part didn't care. She needed release!

When she came, it shocked her as pleasure exploded between her legs and her body locked up, twitching wildly beneath him. She cried out exultantly as wave after wave crested and rolled over her until it hit its peak and began ebbing slowly. He didn't stop until she went completely limp, panting and trying to relearn to breathe.

He stood and moved his hand higher, off her back onto her head, shoving his thumb into her mouth like a bit on a horse. She made a noise of protest, then she felt him pressing his cock against her slit, rubbing it up and down, getting it wet in her slick juices. She made a sound of fear around his thumb, but a twinge of excitement also coursed through her.

He pressed the head of his cock against her opening and pressed harder and harder, spreading her open slowly and she whimpered softly as he slowly gained entrance.

He finally spoke. "Bite down if you need to," he said gently, then pushed into her. She screamed around his thumb as his hand held her head against the bed. She bit down, trying to block out the pain as he pushed into her, working deeper and deeper. He was actually as gentle as he could be and still get the job done and for that she was grateful, but the pain was still more than she could bear. She tried in vain to escape his slow thrusts, but he held her firmly in place with a hand on her head and another on her hip. She was biting hard on his thumb, so hard her jaw ached, but the pain would not ease. Finally, he pushed in and grunted and she felt him throb inside of her, then spill his seed into her again and again as he pulsed.

He let go of her hip and tugged his thumb out of her teeth, then pulled out of her and flipped her skirts down quickly before lifting her onto the bed and turning her to lay on her back. He turned and went to the basin to wash himself, then pulled on a pair of linen pants and came to bed, laying with his back to her.

She lay there on the gown, feeling his seed and her own blood slide out of her onto the blooding gown and she cried quietly and stared up at the ceiling. It could have been worse, she knew that. He could have been rough. He could have not made her enjoy it and get excited enough to take him more easily. He could have hurt her. He hadn't even said a harsh word to her.

She fell asleep thinking about Ben and what her wedding night would have been like with him. She woke to darkness, shivering violently with cold. Wind blew curls over her face and she sat up, looking over. All of the windows were wide open.

She scrambled off the bed, having to lower herself off and fall to her feet, then hurried to close the windows.

"Don't," he barked sleepily. "I like the cold."

She hesitated, hugging herself, then went back to the bed and stood there helplessly, not wanting to ask for help. She turned instead and went to the couch where she had slept the night before, but the blanket was gone. She fumbled around and found heavy fabric on the floor and picked it up, feeling it to see what it was. His overcoat. She curled up under it on the couch and huddled in on herself, trying to get warm and ignore the pain in her lower abdomen.

He woke her in the morning by pulling his coat off of her. "You will sleep in our bed," he demanded tersely, tossing the coat away, back to the floor. "There are witnesses waiting for the gown. Your servant is bringing you a dressing robe, remove the gown."

She immediately untied the waist, turning away from him and tried to pull it off over her head. He took hold from behind and pulled it off of her, then draped a sheet over her shoulders before turning the gown inside out to look at it in the light. Alice glanced, but immediately turned away from the blood stained garment, her cheeks burning with shame.

"The pain won't last," he said quietly, just before Leona hurried in with a dressing robe for her. She wrapped her in it and tied it, then stood back as Havilan took Alice by the arm and pulled her through the door.

The officiant was there, along with Malcolm and Greggory, Captain Avery and a man she did not know. Havilan handed the man she did not know the garment and he opened it wide for everyone to witness.

Greggory pressed his lips together and gave Havilan a frosty look. "Did you have to be so rough with her?"

Havian snorted and crossed his arms, sneering at Greggory.

Alice quickly spoke up. "He was not rough," she said quietly. "I am small and he is large... it is normal." Her cheeks were burning with shame, but she felt the need to defend the man who had not purposely hurt her. As much as he hated her, he could have.

The man handed the gown to the officiant and he folded it before putting it in a small metal chest and locking it. They all left, but Malcolm and Greggory lingered.

"Are you attending breakfast, Hav?"

"Not this morning," he snapped.

"Dinner?" Greggory asked frostily.

Havilan sneered again. "You've taken a shine to the girl already? Overprotective big brother? Back off soldier or I'll have you on latrine duty for a month of Sundays. Just because you're my brother now doesn't mean I don't still outrank you. Fuck off, both of you."

Alice watched as the two men left with concerned looks at her before they did. She lowered her head and turned in the direction of Havilan without looking at him. He put his hand on her shoulder and gently pushed her in the direction of the bedroom, then led her in with a hand on her back.

"Out," he snapped at Leona, who was standing quietly, ready to help Alice with whatever she needed. Leona fled, pulling the door closed behind her.

He led Alice to the bed, then pulled the tie on her robe and slid it off of her shoulders. She was beginning to panic as he lifted her and put her up on the bed. He stepped back and began pulling his own clothes off.