All Comments on 'An Ebony Babe'

I liked the premise of the story, and I'm always for interracial sex, but I think you could use an editor. The only real complaint I have, in fact, is the writing itself. Some of your sentences were broken into fragments, the dialogue was iffy... basically, if you worked with an editor and got your thoughts and grammar in order, this story becomes golden. And obsidian. Hah hah.

A good quick read!

Very hot and believable. Keep writing the descriptions in the story are great

This would have been Hot if it had have been edited properly and had a few minor changes. Do yourself a favour and get an editor to look your next story over, or contact me if you'd like for someone to correct errors and make suggestions on how to turn a story that's average into a 5.0.

I hope to hell there's going to b a sequel because you developed this story way too FAST! I hope there's going to b a little seduction & a lot of 'eating' & experimentation done. You have a good premise, here! DON'T waste it & DON'T b in such a hurry! It doesn't DESERVE, "Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am" treatment!

Very enjoyable - please write more.

Practice will improve - as with everything! :-)

As others have said, all you need is a good editor.

NAUGHTY, NAUGHTY. HOW OFTEN DO WE PLAY WHEN ARE PARENTS ARE AWAY??? BAM!

Well I've had 3 years to think about all of the things i was doing wrong.( and no I wasn't in jail. I just haven't been on in a while.) I haven't been on here in a while, but now I'm thinking of coming back and writing with more patience and diligence. I read through my stories and quickly found my errors. Thank you to all the people who've commented over those few years. :)

This was really good it made me want a white guy to fuck