All Comments on 'Anne - Whole World Come Undone'

Very well written, it certainly does a good job of exposing the emotions of some involved with a cheating family member (sorry kids very few get an erection when they find out and it doesnt make a stronger marriage, it just lets one spouse know the other is a weak little loser) though this and others like it, are more a fantasy than reality.

Of course the reality of a cheating spouse is often nothing like this. Its nasty, its brutal and the cheater is usually looking for some type of out/change in their life (even if its just for their own benefit), and few collapse and nearly have a break down. Not to say they dont, they do, but these are more akin to a unicorn in truth.

Still very well done.

Strange how this category has become Hating wives. Read the category and write to that. You hate your wife, fine do it in another category.

Only an asshole would write this story.

plagiarized from "No Way Back"

I've read this story before, or something very similar to it. The wife got caught walking back to her room, carrying her shoes, by her family standing at the elevator. It's practically a duplicate, as far as I can remember. I think it was on this site too, but I can't remember the name.

I love stories that end in divorce even after one “mistake”. If more people divorced after infidelity regardless of the situation, I GUARANTEE that the number of people cheating would nose dive

The setup here is exactly the same as the far superior 2016 posting No Way Back? by whatdreamsmaycome.

There's a lot of riffing on others' stories on this site, which is fine, but ordinary courtesy dictates that the later writer at least acknowledge the efforts of the original writer. The absence of such credit here makes this just a piece of plagiarism.

garnishing for child support is common practice.

first thing done in m y divorce and a bunch of others.

at least in ohio

When I finished my first story a friend who read it told me to “show don’t tell”. Let your characters talk. You can show their emotions more vividly. Please put dialogue into your story. This is meant as constructive criticism. Your story was well put together, you easily could insert dialogue into your story. Keep writing and you will get better.

Some moron suggested this didn't follow real life! I know of 2 situations EXACTLY like this. You raac idiots want to reconcile no matter what. She deserved everything she got. I especially liked someone said it was becoming wife hating category, well it should. I still remember being cheated on once and how I hated that slut.

TØS ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Only an asshole would defend the behavior of a slag like that.

I agree with the anon five hours ago. An asshole.

A familiar LW scenario, with a much deeper look at the emotional destruction wrought by her cheating. The damage done to the daughters is life altering for them. Every father wants to protect his children and he had to witness the emotional assault they suffered. For me, that alone would have ended any change of reconciliation.

To charges of plagiarism, yes the story is similar, but not the same. There are more than one stories like this on LW. This story concentrated on the emotional damages to the kids and less on the spousal conflict. I’d say it was inspired by other stories and maybe that inspiration should have be in a prequel. QW is a newer writer and, in this instance, shouldn’t be attacked for plagiarism.

didn't like the ending. And very similar to another story on this site.

This story needs to be finished, What happened to Paul, he isn’t innocent and Steve the girls and Anne need closure.

With over 38,000 stories in the LW genre it is next to impossible to come up with a totally different story. It is sort of like "sampling" in the music world.

I liked it.

I would've liked more meat on the bones though.

Pain is a big part of a betrayal

but background ('life before') and aftermath

need attention too.

I tip my hat to the pain part.

That was really well done.

4 out of 5 from me.

This is a great story and very well written. It deserves way more than it's currently scoring.

Don't be discouraged, Mate.

Damn when are women going to understand.......cheat to feel young when nearing 40???????? be prepared to be alone and starting over after 40!!!!!! Stupid, Stupid women. Unless your married to a punk, this WILL be the outcome of your actions.

Good story. Crappy ending.

I agree -- there needs to be a part 2 here...

I agree with this story...if there's love at first sight then one can completely distroy the love you feel for them in a single act. It doesn't always happens but sometimes it does.

Many of the comments below? Bullshit! The story does NOT need finishing. I submitted a dozen stories to this site, but removed myself out of frustration.

I'm English, and write with English style and grammar. We like incomplete endings. But I could not get past these moronic Americans who said 'You didn't finish the story! What size were her tits? What happened next? So now I've left, I have to post as Anonymous.

For those of us intelligent enough to employ a touch of imagination, this story was complete. Well done. Five stars.

That was sad. A broken family seeing there mom cheat in the flesh. A one time fling and no chance for forgiveness.

Is that the end? I guess so and that is fine. Nothing happens to Paul, which is always the case it seems, in real life. Pauls of this world, too often go unscathed. The devastation was very real and felt as such as I read each sad line. All I could think about is how often this scenario plays out in real life. We are such stupid, self centered creatures. 5 stars for the intensity and sorrow.

What a great story! The cheating and being caught in the most horrible way, and the devastating conflict between Anne and her family The affair led to a divorce. That's a capsule of the story, but the writing was superb, and the shock of seeing his wife and their mother was wonderfully portraited. The message of the story is clear, but it is the responsibility of commentors to review the author's work and not Anne's mistake. We all know this kind of tragedy occurs but are we aware of the skill of the author in producing great word pictures of the emotions of the six people involved. Fabulously well written story. One of the best.

I rated it a 3. I perfer reconciliation stories esp. if there is true remorse. In this situation, wife cheats once after a long happy marriage. There are children. Of course wife was wrong and deserved punishment but husband's pride come at a great cost, to him, his normally faithful wife, who would almost be guarantied to never cheat again, his wife, and himself. I would have preferred a some drama, and a reconciliation after wife repented. Just me.

anon.1

Reads like someone wasn't happy with WDMC putting the couple back together and decided to write a BTB ending. No credit given, which isn't cool.

Plagiarism, NO. If you are a prolific LW reader there is no way some ideas will not creep into your stories. Similar but not a copy.

/

Due to Anne's change in personality I cannot see how she would remain successful and out going in her job - an issue not covered.

/

What happen to Paul - totally missed. And no retribution by Steve, hey it was a company sponsored function - they were BOTH managers, the company has no fraternization policies?

/

4.6*, Hooyah, but the ending was too short for a full 5.

Ineffably sad. Steve did the right thing. How could he not? Anne needed to be gone, gone, gone, both for his and the girls' sake. Glad to see he got the 70/30, house, and sole custody. As it should be. So I was ready to give this a 5, but then saw the comment that nothing happened to Paul, so was ready to mark it down to a 4, but then saw the comment by Vandemonium1. Apparently the scores haven't been too good on this, so Van1 made me want to mark it back up to the original 5. So a 5 it is. Also, I am very pleasantly astounded to see a comment here from adevilru12. Adevilru12 only posted 2 stories, 1 in 2013 and the other in 2014. And both of them are absolute stone classics. 5's to the skies. "The Gift" and "Thank You Ronnie Milsap" - a limited output on a par with that of the similarly long-absent Jidoka. So great to see that adevilru12 is still around. May he go from strength to strength, regardless of whether or not he ever contributes another story.

QM

Hey, I just posted, and then scrolled down the comments further and saw that someone had flagged this as a rip of "No Way Back" by WhatDreamsMayCome. There ARE notable similarities, but there's no reconciliation here. So I'll give this one a pass. As KRD19254 noted, it's hard to avoid some duplications. After all, how many discovery possibilities are there for this sort of thing? Oh, and QW still gets a 5 for "Anne."

QM

Got to love the losers that throw out a man's pride or ego when they can't handle a man kicking a cheating wife to the curb. " But she would never cheat again". Bullshit!! If she wouldn't have gotten caught the first time I guarantee she would have done the same thing at the next convention and the next and the next. Some men need to be able to look at themselves in a mirror. So yeah, I'll keep my pride and ego instead of a wife I can't trust to keep her legs together.

Third post from me, because for some reason the comments wouldn't print in their usual reverse order (most recent first), so to see if my comments had been posted, had to click the link where they went in chrono order (earliest first), which included comments from the earlier posting of this story, which I hadn't seen. OK, long way around to saying that I found another comment - one of those earlier ones - worth commenting on. And wouldn't ya know it, it's from the great Legio_Petria_Nostra, who noted something that's puzzled me for a long time, too. Which is that these LW husbands father daughters 100 times or so more often than sons. WTF? Sort of Red China demographics in reverse.

QM

Steve was pretty unforgiving for a one time mistake to blow up his marriage. If it were reversed the BTB crowd would expect to to forgive him. This is the second time I’ve read this and still think Steve needed to put on his big boy pants get some counselling and a post nup. and get over it. A family together is better than a family divorced as the kids will likely be just as unforgiving in their lives because of it.

As long as the cheater doesn't go away with it, I'm in for you.

So many pieces of shit on here mostly written by women to justify cuckoldry.

One thing in our generation is constant, that marriage mean nothing anymore. So, if you clave a different dick, tell your husband you're through with him.

Get divorced.

Move on.

Just do it like civilized people instead of leaving broken hearts around

Damn. Pretty harsh. But it is what it is and quite often it happens that way. Sad too.

No winner here.

Captcha

What is there to say about this story? I think it covered all the bases when it comes to cheating. The one and only redeeming factor in the wife's defense was her cheating wasn't premeditated. Thus does not justify what she did nor excuse it. In my own experience and having a wife 6 years younger the wife decided she wanted to go out and 'look' around and topped the off with "if it doesn't work out can I come back". We got a divorce, her choice not mine. So you see tis story is right on the mark. The only decision the father and daughters have to make are you better off apart or together, is their forgiveness or not. What does everybody deserve? Happiness, sadness, regret, anger, loss? No one can understand except by experiencing this sad situation. ditto, no winners here not much more to say. Our author covered it all, no drama, no PI's or sneaking around just true life and the end of another marriage because some woman wanted to feel young and attractive again.

Not true BTB, but not RAAC either thank you.

Great story. Horrible and sad events. No winners at all, the family, the parents and even the boyfriend realised his error. No going back for anyone.

Probably much closer to what happens in real life. One stupid error and seven lives all fucked up.

Five stars.

Not sure what to think of this. It was well written (though the ending seemed very rushed) and captured the pain and sadness of a broken family. However, I think the writer was far too harsh with Steve being so unforgiving. I got the feeling that he never truly loved Anne, rather he loved the idea of being married to her.

timriv needs to take his panties off and try to grow a set of balls.

Every important element of this story is shamelessly copied without acknowledgement from whatdreamsmaycome’s earlier story No Way Back.

I’m reminded of the lyrics of Tom Lehrer’s classic song, Lobachevsky:

“Let no one else's work evade your eyes

Remember why the good Lord made your eyes

So don't shade your eyes

But plagiarize, plagiarize, plagiarize”

The story was Ok. I didn’t really care for the ending it seemed rushed.

Is there going to be a second part? No hint other than what seems an unfinished story.

to those "cheating women" saying that Steve was too harsh or cold, this is what is coming your way soon!

Ok. A sad story, but I am sure it happens every day. Definitely a 5. That being said, I think most women who cheat, have at least a few Narcissist tendencies. Or, they are unhappy with their marriage. I found it interesting that she never tried to blame her cheating on her husband. It is human nature, to deflect blame onto someone else. Most women are pretty pragmatic. Before they allow something like this to happen, they have already ran thru the consequences in their mind, and accepted it. I understand how a man could be stupid enough, to put everything he loves at risk, for something that means nothing to him. But women.... IDN. I think there would have been more to this story.

A good story. However it needs a second part too end or to continue.

Straightforward story. you get caught cheating you get divorced as you undoubtedly should.

Anne not only cheated but would've continued cheating that entire trip as she planned then got home and played the good wife deceiving her husband for years to come. Who knows when she'll cheat again, like when she feels old or has an argument or gets bored or whatever reason, she is past being trusted. Steve didn't deserve that. and now he will never know how many dalliances Anne has had, if she had was ever faithful or if he was even her first choice.

Both men and women are stupid enough to cheat and lose everything for something that means nothing, anyone who doesn't understand that is retarded and in denial. Anne got divorced as she deserved and fucked both her lover and her family thoroughly, anyone who thinks Steve should've stayed married is admitting they find cheating acceptable. 5 star story

Not finished.

Why would Ann have to pay child support?.Her husband earnt more than her,plus the divorce settlement was weighted in his favour.

Although, the story deserves a rating of 4 to 5, the story is not finished. Don’t expect the writer to submit one. His previous attempt at this story (this is a revised submission) left it as it is now. Hopefully, a few writers out there will get the ok to finish this one

Why do so many of these writers just leave the story hanging. Finish the foor God's sake, the submit it.

I believe I read this story over a year ago. Am I wrong? If I did, why is it presented as a new release? If not, plagiarism seems applicable here. Either way, an ending or some sort of resolution is needed. Some writers think of themselves as being chic with leaving a story unfinished. Hopefully, this writer is not one of them. The story is too good to leave it as is.

What a sad mess. Did anyone warn the young man future wife another chapter is needed.

I like to read the comments. One was wondering why she had to pay child support. Well in our county the wicked judge she must have been a man hatter. My brother was cheated on and the wicked judge gave her the children the house spousal support and child support. Their were a lot of people started campaigning against her and she finally was voted out. Than God.

The story is as the author made it so I won't make any comment on it. However, there is no way possible for someone to "nod no". If they "nod", they are indicating YES. If they "shake", they are indicating NO.

I liked tge story however with that said after such a long marriage before the betrayal I think this story could have one or two alternate endings.

WTH??

I've read a few comments that the story isn't finished.

How the hell can people say that. He divorced the cheating slut and minimised all contact with her. What else was supposed to happen?

I agree with the commenters saying child support from Anne is very unlikely. It was never stated explicitly that she made more money than he did but still, in this country and this day and age, that's very unlikely.

Good story but a weak ending, and to the commenter who said the husband would never get child support, judges will typically award child support to the custodial parent.

Garnished instead of garnisheed appears regularly in LW stories from the US. Garnish is what is added to make food etc more attractive.

This reminds me of a conversation I once had, with my now wife. We were dating, and I was complaining about all the speeding tickets I had, and was in serious jeopardy of getting a restricted license. My 21 year old girlfriend said, “ well, you could always just drive the speed limit”. And I had an epiphany. Maybe, I DID have some control over this!

In any case, everyone that cheats, has the opportunity to say “no, or yes”. What you DO NOT have the right to do, is expect HOW your spouse will handle it, or whether or not you get divorced. The thing that I have the least respect for, is woman or men, who threaten to shred their spouse in the divorce, or take the kids away. The proper thing to do, is acknowledge you did a really shitty thing, and go along with whatever reasonable action, your spouse wants to take. Even tho the wife thought about how she would use divorce to gut her husband, in reality she understood the consequences of her actions, and didn’t fight the terms. This will make some sort of reconciliation with her kids, a lot more possible. Good people, sometimes do bad, or stupid things. But own up to it, take responsibility.

Ps- And as for the advice, the pretty 21 year old girl gave me? I have been married to her, for 36 years. And I haven’t had, any more speeding tickets. Life, is good.

5 stars.

I've mixed feelings about this story. True, Anne's actions devastated Steve and the girls. And she did a terrible job trying to explain her behavior. BUT.

This was a one-time thing. And everyone in this story, especially the adults are very emotional people. I'd have to think that this situation, unlike most other stories, would benefit from A) a cooling off period, B) some good couples counseling, and C) some good Individual counseling for both Steve and Anne.

Much as I like a good BTB, I do like a reconciliation when it's appropriate. Maybe a follow-up story. I do recall FOOLS GOLD where they ended up together after 5 years.

So he should've let a 1 time thing pass w/ no consequences? Where does it end, 2, 3 more affairs.. Yes, she could've been faithful for the rest of her life but to some maybe most ppl, once that trust is gone, u wont be getting that back along with the love that was once there. So its better to cut ur losses then and there. Sorry, but there should be no forgiveness because of what the children went thru. Just imagine how this scenario will impact the childrens lives going forward..

Read many comments. I don’t think it’s finished, yet still good. I know I sound sexist, but men are territorial. That place between our wives legs has been promised to only us. Once another man has invaded it and with her permission. The marriage is over. It has to be. The promised land is gone. No place to build...anything.

This is a good story. The problem is that it is nothing short of plagiarism. It is a careless rewrite of NO WAY BACK by whatdreamsmaycome. That story was posted back in 2016. It is not unusual for stories to resemble each other in places, but this one goes way beyond that. No stars for a stolen story!

Why was the condom box in Anne's room when she slept in Paul's?.Also why did she have to pay child support,Steve earnt more then her?.

A lot of people are commenting that he would never be given child support because he made more money. Child support is not awarded based on who makes more money. It is awarded to the custodial parent, otherwise the custodial parent would be responsible for all of the costs associated with raising a child.

Ah, you don't want to break up the family. Think of the Children. Thinking of the children always tug on my heart strings, but as Stephen said You are the one that broke of the family,

consequences is a bitch

Paul should have gotten his engagement ended

Finally, some realistic story. No mastermind husbands with some cunning plan of revenge or complete evil wives without sheds of morality.

5 from me.

Brutally clear and geaphic portrayal of the cost of cheating.

No man, worthy of the title, would wver forgive, let alone take back, a woman like Ann.

Stupid bitch. 40 yo,well past any real option of a loving relationship, all that remains is the burned out wreckage of the family she destroyed.

Damn.

Reality…. What a concept….!

5⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Would have liked an epilogue (Family of 3 for next 5 years)

Plz write more!

That was brutal

thought this was very good right thru dad and the Girls walking out of her hotel room. Then it got too "talkie" with all the thoughts, emotions. DO like that the kids got to actually see and hear in person the cheating spouse. That leaves no doubt as to whose fault the broken home is.

Its interesting what they say. "Cheating destroyed not only you marriage, but a lot of lives". I know I am a broken goods... I am 28yo, and I have a lot of mental thoughts that forbid me to get married. The most important one is that my spouse will cheat on me... And I know that if that really happen, it will destroyed me completely... My dad cheated on my mom. It destroyed me. My fiance cheated on me and traded up. It destroyed me more deeply. I got sick, depression and stuff.. but if I got married and she cheat on me, even more if we have kids... I dont know if i could walk again....

I know this is super petty but in most of the world you can't NOD your head no! Nod means yes and shake means no.

Not much of a ending.

Very dramatic. The wife's motivation for cheating made no sense beyond she was turning 40. And yet we see at the beginning she was having crushing orgasms with the hubby. There was no discussion. No anything. Husband just turned a switch to "off". Short and simple.

Rushed ending

I can only think of the pain , catching a spouse in the act. This was a debilitating act and ruined the family. Not just the immediate family, but parents and friends both.

Thanks for your writing.

A very brutally real story of what happens to everyone when cheating is discovered

What's with this author's women? They are always falling down and rolling around on the ground. Perfect wives, successful careers, we organized, but with NO backbone.

A hazy sort of an ending. A few little details thrown in would have brought closure to the story' 4.

Another victim of the Martian Slut Ray.

But FTDS. Please

If she had cheated and they hadn't seen it, but it was then discovered, she might have had a chance. An interesting difference. D

Incomplete story. 2 star.

Paul needed the horseshit kicked out of him and his fiancé has to be told. Incomplete story.

I enjoyed the story. I find the author writes very well about weak men, whose pain is more important to them than their children's well-being. 5 stars

Why would you want to stay with an idiot like her, even for the kids, especially when the kids are hating her as well? Would you call her a weak woman if she did the same being in his situation? Or are you just st a female hypocrite?

This needs more, it feels unfinished

Feel the story is unfinished and needs more. Don’t view Steve as a weak man, do view Anne as a brain dead slut. Paul should have got some pain ( although the author has inferred some disgust with his own actions).

From the beginning of the story, one could feel the love within the family so the devastation felt by everyone including the wife is believably. That said, I get so tired of reading how the woman just wanted to feel young and wanted again. The devastation by all at the end is reality.

I enjoyed the story. I find the author writes very well about strong, understanding better than most, that caring men, who having gained a more mature, balanced, ADULT view on `The Meaning-of-Life, and thankfully no longer feel-the-need to join their childish weaker, hollow, insincere-and- insensitive, uncaring, loud-mouthed young-buck Brethren in their endless `Pissing-Contests' for perceived `masculine superiority' & whose "rep" is more important to them than their children's well-being. It's wonderful to see a story where a real man's maturity, and his steadfast strength throughout the whole period of adversity created SOLELY by his selfishly entitled wife but affecting their two daughters just as much, more in some ways, less in others, but overall going nuclear, flattening the entire family, THREE generations, -in it's first wave of consequences! And what prospect for the long-term ramifications? A ticking-time-bomb in the heads of TWO-teenage daughters! Will the adolescent hormone cascade turn ME into a rabid slut like my Mom? Is it in my genes? Is it inevitable? Should I kill myself now, before I too ruin so many lives?

This story is NOT only about (yet another?) cheating wife, but also about the pain, and angst, felt by her once-happy daughters, and a strong, once-loving, sensitive and caring man, and also her innocent middle-aged parents, caught-up in the cross-fire, deeply saddened by the actions of THEIR daughter, but assuaged by guilt at their implicit failure in her downfall, and their relationship with their grand-kids threatened and undermined! Terrific! Well done! - 5 stars!

R.S.

Stunning. Captured the emotions so very well.