All Comments on 'Apologize'

Why are people writing this shit?

second night of snuff porn. What crap.

Is it with the fucking snuff bullshit.

Second story in 2 days.

1*

No I'm thinking he was a dumb mother fucker!

Well that sure was sad.

A story befitting your name.

I didn’t see where this was going. The old ‘it’ll be a miracle if you two conceive’ trope had me figuring a pregnancy would happen, but you avoided that; good misdirection.

“Swing through the ball.” Yup, that’s what you’re supposed to do. Ouch!

I’m guessing there won’t be a second chapter.

"Hanging around in the backyard...."

That's a good one 😄.

Plot didn't need much development. Enough about the protagonist and his girlfriend /wife for the story to work.

Entertaining enough for 4*s, from me.

Thank you for the short story ragnarok1.

As usual I'm

AMerryman

Use dialog rather than narration. For example, instead of,

"She told me how sorry she was and that if I wanted to make it official she would agree to be exclusive with me," say,

"I'm so sorry," she said, with seeming sincerity. "If you want to make it official, we can be exclusive."

As an aside, you don't go from barely dating to exclusive so quickly!

"people just don't move into exclusivity that fast". BULLSHIT! I HAD 3 TELEPHONE CONVERSATIONS before I met my wife. Our first date lasted 13 hours. Neither of us wanted to leave. Two weeks later I moved in and we stayed married for 37 years until Ovarian cancer took her. Two years later I met someone on line, after 5 dates she moved in with me. We married and have celebrated our 4th anniversary. I am 69 and she is 44. Our sex life is torrid, and our affection is celebrated with hugs, kissing, (our kids say "EW". FOLLOW your own inspiration.

Yes, a dark ending but that’s what u might get when deep love is trifled with.

He loved the idea of her being his exclusively. Love means caring about the other person's needs. Clearly he didn't.

It was going great until the end. Could he not have hit him in the balls, crushing them. He could have claimed he thought she was being attacked and then had it out with the wife in private. She obviously had feelings for her husband. Maybe they could have worked it out? Then maybe not. 4 stars. Took one off for a disappointing ending.

For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance. He will not regard any ransom; neither will he rest content, though you give many gifts. King Solomon Prov 6:34-35

I could argue tense, what should have said instead of what was. But what you wrote and submitted was apply titled and executed with an ease that gave nothing away, umtil the very end. Great job. 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

but I kinda liked it. How many stories do we read on hear where the dweeb gits the babe only to end up being a cuck story. How many times do we read about Mr. Macho who makes the wife and lover pay and walks away unscathed. How many times do we read where the husband loses all and becomes a lost soul.

Ragnarok1 showed through out the whole story how much Kurt loved her only to be disrespected in his own home and in his own bed. Beemer got his just desserts and Angelia, well she said 'I'm sorry' one time to many. He also finished the story so there can be no complaints like 'Finish the damn story dude'.

Rag, I am giving you a five even though this story should have been submitted nearer to Halloween. (I enjoyed the hanging around jab also)

4 stars, would have been 5 but, Asshole got what he deserved. The cunt did it to herself, aawww so said the angel couldn't fly. I'm sure she will do just fine with black wings. Now that she is the devils bitch.

The only reason it is not 5 stars is because he took the cowards way out. Must be in a liberal state where he would be going to prison for what he did. In a real state temp insanity and you move on with your life.

No cunt.....I repeat no cunt is worth killing yourself over.

That other "AMerryman" is a fraud. You can tell because he didn't say LOL, even once, he only used one emoji and he gave the story a 4. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯😜

I, the real AMerryman, always say LOL and other cool hip things like that. I use lots of emojis😎😷💩. I also never give out fours. I mostly give twos, but sometimes I give a three to a really great writer like Qhml1 or Oshaw. Just to encourage them, you know.

This story gets a one because I'm AMerryman and I and my band of Merrymen never kill anyone 😨😱. As always, I'm the real

AMerryman.

I suspect in real life the base ball bat gets used more than the cock cage. Let us applaud his eliminating the trash and helping to clean up the gene pool.

In the epilogue we should learn that the boyfriend actually lived, in a wheelchair, on a feeding tube, till his 80's, when an infection from being butt fucked from one of the orderlies finally killed him.

Thanks for the effort.

Some may call this some 'snuff' story. BTB fodder.

It's not. Nothing about their fates was glorified. This is normal, this is natural. Man takes other man's woman. Man may kill other man. We are apes. It's how we roll. You take a big risk every time you cheat. While less likely, even women will 'ape-out' and do something similar. You can change the laws, the culture, but this is in our DNA.

It's a cautionary reminder. We're still apes. That wont change. Cheating is a rush, much like a near-death experience. There's a very good reason for that.

Let us know what your therapist thinks of your revenge-fantasy writing exercise.

It really does help to see why we shouldn’t follow our impulses.

(Besides the fact that it’s more likely you’d get your butt kicked)

Sorry your wife left with beemer boy but glad you’re seeking help!

i liked this one, ty for the read

fucking other men wives in their bed is ugly.all fair in love and war.you fuck another man wife you pay.cockold another man and he don't do anything about it is sick.

A very well written story with a unexpectedly shocking ending. Extremely well written and believable. The ending reads much closer to reality than taking time to hit the Beemer in the balls. In a fit of jealous rage , fear, or fatal intent, you swing for the head. You never give a bigger stronger opponent any chance at all. Ragnarok's stories all tend to be toward the, sometimes ugly, realism in life and relationships. That is why I like them so much.

Sbrooks103x, I too must disagree with you about instant attraction. I was introduced to my wife by a friend. We had a six hour lunch, and despite both being active duty, and on different posts, same state, we have been together since. She has been a life saver, and inspiration to me during my recent illness and I think I will keep her always.

“When people show you who they are, believe them the first time."

Kurt refused to believe that his Angela was anything less than the angel his eyes, a dick and his heart believe her to be. And when it came to the realization that she was nothing more than a spoiled, entitled, selfish cunt that took his love for granted, he reacted accordingly. Sadly.

It's a common story, really - a decent guy, ending up in a relationship with someone he truly believes to be superior to him, when the girl in question is actually beneath him in every way that matter (intelligence, diligence, ethic, reliability, believability.) The crazy thing about it was that Angela KNEW that Kurt was undoubtedly her rock... yet still went ahead and destroy them. Typical.

In a way, since fate refused to let them live separate lives, at least the Powers-That-Be prevented them from having any children... 'Will take silver linings anywhere I can found them.

All around sad, really, but it goes to show loving someone unreservedly can doomed the most innocent person. Good work, author.

Sorry, the build up of a character to be a white knight simp and hitting all the red flags of being depressing, pathetic and obsessive to lead to a natural conclusion - hit near the mark at a guess after first page.

Please try write about a normal person instead of someone that falls at either end of the behavioural and social bell curves. A person reading that can relate better than at a depressing and frankly unlikeable character, in a story one can't suspend disbelief or invest into to any meaningful degree.

This was great. You did the song justice. I don't come to LW to read erotic stuff. I come here to read good stories. Most of the erotic LW stuff is cuckolding. This was a very good story.

I usually don't like it when the backstory is explained and especially when it's this long, but you did it justice. You set it up so well for heartbreak. Most stories it's the typical divorce/break up and we already know that's going to happen so reading the backstory is just a waste of time. You went above and beyond that for this ending which made the backstory worth reading.

Like anon "we are apes" said, this is natural. This is realistic. This is not snuff, it's just realistic heartbreak. Again you did the song justice and the lyrics fit with the story. I actually listen to the Silverstein version of "Apologize" a lot more than the original.

This story was so good. I think it's your best so far.

Where he's describing it as elation and how he should be rounding the bases and the fans were screaming his name, until he's brought back to reality and realizes it's his wife shouting his name was hilarious.

And he made the world a better place when he took his own life like a scared little boy. Real men own up to their actions, they don’t run from them. Fucking coward.

The only thing he should have done was killed him self before he murdered his wife’s lover and scared her into falling down the stairs.

But we’ll written. So the characters had problems. Quite honestly you really didn’t establish why she loved him early on, and the reunion was over done. Ten years out of high school, insulting an adult is pretty over the top. Likewise her removing her rings. I’d like it more if the characters were more nuanced.

Lastly with his knowledge of anatomy, it was murder. I don’t see that in his character.

Chilleywilley

So he hung himself ,wife died running in fear. The killing the lover ,he was there because she wanted him. No the trade guy ending! What a waste of lives.

Hate to see a man waste his life on a skank like that. When you go to a man's house and get caught screwing his wife, there is no way of knowing how he will react.

And we never know what's going to pop out of our genes when challenged.

There is a site where people share their experiences to help each other survive infidelity. In the "Just Found Out" forum, new members tell about what they have just discovered, how they reacted, and what they're feeling, and get advice about how best to cope with the immediate future. Very prim and proper Sunday school teachers and people who might describe themselves as pacifists have revealed how chagrined they were to discover how violently they reacted when they found out their spouse was cheating on them, everything from hurting their spouse to totally trashing their house to using foul language that had never before passed their lips. We never really know how we will react to the unexpected, until we are faced with it.

But the basis of there love was clearly explained. The details were everything.

Wow that was sad, I guess things like this have happened tens of thousands of times in America.

Yep ... OK word mechanics, the progress was reasonably clear, but CW’s quibbles are Right On!

4*

Lickideesplit and Chilly Willy. It was the 5 year reunion and yes the cliques and immaturity is still there.

Divorce is better. She was too immature for marriage and in the end I suppose he was, too. Pity. Well told.

Lol. You think? Holy smokes!!!

Wife brings home a guy to fuck in their bed? You know things are going to go downhill fast from there.

Nice discription of the confusion and rage felt by the husband.

An entertaining, 'shit hits the fan' when the husband finds out tale of woe.

SO glad I ran into it. Holy smoke. What a tour de force. Captured the obsessive personality so well. And not social, so probably Aspergers.

Plus, I knew 2 or 3 guys, and at least 1 girl, in art class who were exactly as you describe; always trying to imitate those Franzzetta and Vallejo covers from Heavymetal Magazine. And doing a good job of it.

++5-stars & Favorite

I have to say this writer is one of the better ones. I can say that he puts a lot of imagination in the story line, and doesn't make mistakes. I would have given this story 5 stars except for the suicide at the end. After knowing about how it affects those that survive, parents, siblings and offspring, it just is not for me. remove the last part. Have him wait to be arrested or he is in a mental hospital or tried and released after being judged and serving for involuntary homicide. But no SUICIDE.

can not star..... tooooooo dark for me. LOVE slap hapy papy #9

Just read this story again and the roller coaster of emotions is deep and dark. My only wish is that the wife would not have met her doom and that the husband would have simply slipped outback to his rope swing. It would be interesting to see your take on how the wife handled the death of both her lover and her husband.

This line struck me: "There was no meal, just hors d'oeurves, so there was no reason for us to be together." No reason other than he is her husband and she should want to share the evening with him.

This story is really underrated. It drags a little in places, which fits the character but hurts the flow of the story a bit all the same. Some of the dialogue could use some work to sound more natural. That said, there is some fantastic writing in here.

Thanks for the story.

Cog

I really liked this story. I wish more husbands would react with a baseball bat!!!

I have known a few guys like that usually no success let everyone walk all over them

Except you chose right field Artist!

They get away with it

She was perfect for him self absorbed and knew she could have him back on knees to her by simply apologies your title gave it up

No sympathy for him or her

ewwww comments by the snowflakes are evidence that much of the readership here can't distinguish between literature and what the average person would do or between what some do and what is, at the moment, deemed normative. If they read Hamlet I can only imagine what these sissy bois would say about Shakespeare. (Hint: there's a whole lot of death that results from cheating)

One of the saddest pieces I've read on LW. Another innocent little fling gone wrong.

Better if he put her fingerprints on the bat, left it by her body, and took off. Somehow get an alibi and the call 911 when he "got home" and found the body.

Yuk!!!!!

Well, if he doesn't succeed in hanging himself, perhaps he has a future in baseball, although he will probably have to begin his new career on a prison farm team:). Alternatively, assuming he survives, and I doubt it, he'll make a wicked tattoo artist in prison. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed your story. I always prefer a happier ending, but after decades serving in the Grunts around the world, I realize that reality often trumps happiness.

"...when we dissected the frogs. Seeing the muscles when we opened it up was awesome. It made me understand the human form even that much better. It made my art even that much better." That is exactly why Michelangelo's art is so true to life, although he dissected much more than frogs to do it. On the positive side of the story there is no way some twit can say "cuck shit" about this guy. Nope, no willing cuckold here, but he should have given a little more thought to that box of twelve in her night stand that only had eight left in it. What was that movie line "Love means never having to say you're sorry"? Signed: BTW

The first 90% was somewhat dragged out, then all hell broke loose.

His lack of awareness early on set him up for such a catastrophic ending. He should have walked away at the first slight by the bitch. It was creepy right from the start.

The Polar bears pulling the Warrior goddess chariot? Love the way back machine Rockey

This marriage was doomed from the start. Never, ever marry more than one or two levels above yourself on the scale of one to ten. He married four or five above himself.

Pathetic

If 26thNC praises a story it's got to be good. I think this was a really good story. Thank you so much.

Worst story I ever read

A realistic story, more people considering cheating should read this. There are a few people, that for some, reason cannot control their emotions.

…then why doesn’t he follow the hero-of-our-story’s example and do a bit of dangling himself?

I would greatly admire his no-doubt excellent aerial dancing and would be happy to forgo his ongoing parade of hateful and misogynistic comments in this otherwise pleasant site.

A great story with a realistic outcome.

Les

A well written, but ultimately sad story. And it details what could happen in a real life situation. Sadly, I'm glad I took the time to read it. Good work.

I don’t like the ending but it is a well written story, if it was expanded and sold as a novel it would fail with that ending. However if a more compassionate ending was applied it could be a bestseller

Fucking snuff story…

Well that was an unpleasant depressing read. Not sure how to score it, well written and engaging but not exactly the most enjoyable content matter. Gave it a 3, didn't hate it but certainly didn't like it.

It was an ok story, but too much time was wasted, talking about work, and building up to his obsession with her. Overall, it’s a pretty common thread. A guy marries out of his league, either on looks, or wealth. Wifey decides she deserves move, and leaves him in the dust. I remember a song, can’t remember who wrote it. But one line says” so if you want to be happy for the rest of your life, take an ugly woman, to be your wife” . Maybe you don’t have to go that far. But look at it like this. Let’s say you buy a house that costs $650,000. You work overtime, and eat Ramon noodles, so you can afford the mortgage. Then your “ trophy wife” wants a new car, so you get a additional part time job, to be able to afford that. You are constantly tired, and sick with worry, that the whole thing is going to come crashing down on you. Since you are gone 80-90 hrs a week trying to afford keeping her in the lifestyle she is expecting, wifey starts going out with the girls, and meeting other guys, cause she is “ lonely” . You end up getting divorced, and you still have to work 80-90 hrs a week, to afford to live, after the divorce settlement. But now, SHE lives in the $650,000 house with her boyfriend, and you live in your parents basement. As Jerry Reid said ”why didn’t I just learn how to cook?”

Grizzly and dark. Cold blooded ending. Whoa.

Stupid.

A weak wimpy Kurt wants the uppity rich bitch!! Stupid story

What a fucked up ending.....good riddance to the cheaters

Very well written and an unexpected ending. 5 stars.

It's hard to believe someone would continue to want a relationship with someone that obviously thought so little of them in the first place.

Sad ending, but it happens.

Another happy story. Mother Goose will be adding this to the stories in her collection.

Obsession is often mistaken for love, as is lust and sex. Often those feelings push people over the edge. The last paragraphs tell it all.

5* Cool story.

Yea she really loved something.

That’s a rather good story, just that bit different, nicely written not over the top to much, but puts the loving husband’s point of view into a clear perspective, yes you made him” odd” but not so odd, plenty of people are just like that, I loved that for once on here you got the bad guy get his comeuppance, yes so did she but more by accident but you really didn’t pull the punches on that brilliant ending, why not, he had lost everything he ever wanted or had. Really good read.

First time I didn't like it. This time I felt like I was reading Poe. Not generally my cup of tea but damned impressive.

Far better than it's score.5

This was a great story until he killed him and she died. It ain't worth killing over.

Well that turned out to be pretty hateful. Please warn us if you intend to write about murder.

"Sometimes, though, I just want to be fucked. He just doesn't know how to do that." - Don't wives think that maybe their husbands would welcome not having to always seduce them, would like to occasionally "just fuck them?"

Too bad he snapped like that but like the French say cherchez la femme.

torn between the 3 rating I gave you and a 2 rating. not much new with this except 3 ruined lives

She said ‘I just want to be fucked’ well she’s fucked now.

This story was awesome. Guys feel such extreme emotions over their women it's not hard to see how he just snapped in the moment. His girl just said she doesnt even think he deserves her while alluding to a long term affair. It's conceivable that it was just too much to take.

Wow!