April Fool Pt. 01

The whole bit of her interacting with people live became a thing, so she went with it causing her subscribers to blow up.

Since I was always the "tech genius" in the family, I was the one that set up her YouTube channel. And since my company specialized in monetizing YouTube links to products embedded in videos, Mom's channel was our first success case. We partnered up with stores willing to pay commissions for click traffic generated from their videos, which only added to her revenue stream.

From what she told me; she makes so much money from her online business that she quit teaching her Yoga class (at a gym) a few years ago so she could focus all her time on her online businesses which include the aforementioned YouTube channel, but expanded into other platforms such as Patreon, Tick Tock, and Instagram.

"What do you want to know?" I asked, not sure how far to take this.

"You knew she was, umm, promiscuous before you met her. What was it like having sex with a porn star?" she asked, conspiratorially like we were sharing a big secret.

"She wasn't a porn star when I met her. There wasn't anything she wasn't willing to try, and we tried everything. When we first started, I think I filled every hole and crevice at least twice a day. The sex was out of this world, and I never felt like I wasn't enough for her. But what do I know? Apparently, I can't fuck her ass, pussy and mouth at the same time so..."

I thought Mom would be disgusted by what I just said but when I looked in her eyes, she looked excited for some reason.

"Did you two ever swap partners or anything?" she asked.

"No, Mom, I'm not big on sharing," I said. "I mean, I have fantasized about it. I guess my ego is too big to watch another man fuck my woman. Maybe one day I'll be more open-minded about it but I haven't gotten there yet."

"I imagine you'd have to be pretty big down there," she said pointing low, "to satisfy a woman like that."

I turned red but I figured we got this far in the conversation; I doubt she'd care if I took it further.

"She said I was just big enough to fill her up and stretch her just right. Apparently, some guys she did scenes with were much bigger than me but having sex with them was either painful or would be so long that they wouldn't fit all the way in, so the extra size just went to waste. She said that she rarely had a real orgasm with any of them. I even asked why she did it if I was so satisfying in bed. You know what her response was? 'It was exciting just to do it.' I guess she go off on the illicit nature."

"Ummm, do you mind if I ask?" she grinned looking down at my crotch, knowing that I knew what she was going to ask. I hesitated so she said, "Come on, I know all you guys measure it eventually."

I must have given her a look that confirmed that because she said, "See! So? How big?"

"This is weird... Fine! It's almost eight inches in length and eight inches in girth... Happy?" I blurted.

I know I just blurted it out, but I knew once my Mom asked, she would just be relentless about it until she got her answer, so it was easier just to be forthright. I didn't care how big I was I never had any complaints; So I was satisfied with knowing I was big and that was enough for me. I only found out because Casey was curious and measured me. Looking back, it made me wonder if she was planning on getting me in the business.

"Holy shit, Baby! You could do porn with a package like that," she said proudly.

"I guess. I mean Casey even mentioned that. After I confronted her, she practically begged me to audition. She said I was a natural."

"You didn't..." she gasped, aghast.

"God, no!" I yelled. "Besides, I'm making more money doing what I love than I would ever make in that industry."

"Yeah, but you'd have plenty of pussy..." Mom started.

"Mom! Really?" I asked, surprised at her crudeness.

I was slightly shocked. I really didn't know where this was coming from. Mom never used "adult language" around me before. I always grew up with her saying correcting my potty mouth. It's not like I hadn't heard it before or talked that way myself, but my Mom was destroying all illusions I had of her.

She started laughing, "What? I thought that was every man's dream."

I had to mentally shrug and just accept the new her. I kind of liked it. It was very liberating.

"Not mine. Besides, I've never had a problem getting laid. At least not until recently," I said, getting more comfortable talking to her like I would a friend rather than my mother.

"I know that Baby. You're a very, VERY handsome man," she gushed. "You know, growing up, most of the other moms often talked about you. You were on their number one hit list."

"Hit list? You had a hit list?" I asked, nonplussed.

This was just getting better and better.

"Well of course, Baby. What did you think? All we did all day was cook and clean for you kids and drive you around everywhere?"

"No, but you're talking about teenagers, Mom!"

"Oh, come on, Honey. It was just harmless fun, no one ever acted on it. As far as I know, it was just a way for them to blow off steam," she teased.

"As far as you know?" I asked.

"Believe me if anything like that did happen, YOU would have been the first to know about it. You know how you boys like to brag," she said.

"I guess," I said, unsure.

"You remember that game your friends would play, where every time a pretty girl would walk by, one of you would ask 'Would you?' and you'd shrug or grin?"

"You knew about that?" I asked, embarrassed and she just grinned in response. "Yeah but, in our defense, we were horny teenagers."

"Baby, there's nothing hornier than a neglected housewife," she laughed.

I couldn't help laughing with her.

Then I asked, mainly to irk her, "Was I on YOUR hit-list?"

She blushed and said, "I'm not telling."

That did not go well with me trying to NOT think of my Mom sexually. I knew I would be dreaming about her tonight after that comment.

"Okay, okay, enough," I said, "I'm almost as horny as a housewife myself and this conversation is not helping. You want to go for a run? The riverbed trail is still open, but they are talking about shutting it down soon, so this may be the last time we can run out of the neighborhood for a while."

She almost jumped out of her seat and said, "Yes! Let me go change!"

"Want me to see if Mandy wants to come?" I asked, offhandedly.

"Ohhh, would you? That would be great!" she said fading away as she continued on to the master bedroom.

I ran upstairs taking steps two at a time. I was excited and I wasn't sure why. You would think I had been invited to an orgy the way I was acting.

I rapped on my sister's door hard in case she had her headphones on or something. I knew better than to barge into her room unannounced. I had gotten an eyeful a time or two when I hadn't.

"Yeah? What do you want?" she asked, annoyed.

"Hey sis, it's me!" I answered through the door.

"Oh, come in Bri," she said, less annoyed.

I opened the door enough to poke my head in just to see my sister splayed out in a sexy pose. My sister was a blonde bombshell in training. Her tits were still growing, and her hips where still filling out but she was on her way to being Mom's twin.

She wasn't nude but she was barely dressed in just a tank top and panties (no bra). Her laptop was off to the side and I could see a paused video clip of what was obviously porn.

She saw where I was looking and shrugged saying, "A girl's got needs too."

"Yeah? No judgements here. I just wanted to see if you were up to taking a run with me and Mom," I asked nonchalantly. "Just like old times."

She shrugged again as if it was no big deal, but I could see that her eyes lit up.

"Yeah OK!" she said, her voice pitched noticeably higher.

"Hurry. You know Mom doesn't like to be kept waiting," I demanded with a mischievous grin.

"OKAAAAY!" she said, throwing a shoe at the door, as I ducked behind the door and closed it before the shoe could get in range.

I ran to my old room and threw on some running shorts, a rash guard and a light running shirt.

We liked to take long runs and I learned a long time ago running in the wrong outfit was a bad idea. When I first started my marathon training, I ran in cotton T-shirts. We worked on getting up to 26 miles by increasing our running time each Saturday. Everything was going fine until the Saturday I attempted to run my first twenty-mile run. I guess twenty miles was my nipple's breaking point because they were rubbed raw and bled down the front of my shirt like two red waterfalls.

The funny thing was, it didn't even hurt, and I hadn't noticed it until after the run. I don't even know how long I ran with the bloody streaks, but it could very well had been an hour. It was Mom that noticed it after the run and rushed me to her car to get bandages. Ever since then, I ran with a rash-guard underneath my shirts because tape would fall off due to sweat and Glide didn't seem to work.

After I donned my running shoes, I grabbed my running belt and ran downstairs to fill up the water flasks. I grabbed a few energy bars and loaded them in my poach.

I waited at the door for Mom and Amanda when I saw Mom come down the hallway in a bright pink spandex outfit that looked painted on her. I don't think the material was even spandex, it had a design to it where parts of it were semi translucent so that you could see parts of her skin through the leggings and top. The semi-translucent parts went down crisscrossed across her top like branches of a tree and what looked like two twisting trunks flowed down both of her legs. Part of the design seemed to draw my eyes to her crotch whether it was intentional or not.

"Fuck me! Are you running in that?" I exclaimed.

"What's wrong with this?" she asked coyly.

"You're going to have me tripping over my own tongue. That's what."

I didn't even have time to react to her laughing because my sister followed my mom down with an even sexier outfit. Granted she had on a sports bra, but she was also wearing little boy shorts that were so short that the bottom part of her ass stuck out of them. She had the sexiest milky white legs I had ever seen, and I knew I was in trouble when my cock started to waken from its slumber and ignored the fact that this was my family.

"Holy shit. What did I ever do to deserve this?" I asked, perturbed.

My sister looked confused as to why my mom was laughing but after that statement, she joined her mirth at my expense.

"What's the matter BIG brother. Can't handle two sexy women?" she laughed.

"You two are such cock teases," I moaned.

I expected them to be insulted, maybe even feel some shame and change their outfits, but I saw no mercy in their eyes, just a jovial taunting as they just laughed even more. Despite all of that, I felt like the luckiest guy in the world to be running with these beauties even if they were off limits.

We ran down to a park that led us onto a riverbed. Something about running always helped me control my erection, but also keeping my eyes on the horizon helped too because Amanda's ass was tempting my cock out of hiding with each sway and Mom's bouncing breasts and camel toe didn't help either.

Our run was very familiar, we three had run it many times in the past and it hadn't changed since the last time we ran together. I knew I kept up on my conditioning and of course Mom did also, but I half expected Amanda to be lagging behind, yet she didn't seem winded at all. She was even using our normal pace, so that told me that, even after she left for college, she kept up her runs despite her always stating she hated it.

"Wow, Sis. I'm impressed," I said, not realizing that by taking notice of her my eyes wandered down to her ass and became transfixed.

"With my ass? You should, I work hard to get it looking this good," she laughed, looking at me lustily.

I turned red and decided not to respond.

This route was a twenty-mile trek, which normally could be extended to a full twenty-six if the beaches weren't closed, but I knew that they were. The halfway point ended at the ocean where there was a coffee shop we'd often stop off at and hangout at before heading back home. With the shutdown, the coffee shop was closed so we didn't waste any time resting and instead just turned around and headed back.

As we were running, we were chatting back and forth like we used to. I found that I really missed our daily talks and it dawned on me how important my mom and sister had been in my life.

"I knew once Brian stopped moping, he would get you out of your room," Mom gushed, and Amanda blushed. "So, do you want to talk about it?"

Amanda looked unsure.

"Come on. Your brother hasn't been shy. I just found out his girlfriend was a porn star..." Mom blurted.

"Mom!"

"What? She's not?" Mom asked, innocently.

"I can't call her a slut but it's OK for you to call her a porn star?" I asked, failing to humble her in the least.

I didn't know why I was defending Casey, so I gave up, "Anyways, she's an amateur at best," I lamely corrected.

"Really? I'm sorry to hear that," Amanda said, not looking sorry one bit as she suddenly smiled from ear to ear.

"You don't have to revel in my misery," I said, "Want some salt to pour on my wounds too?"

"Oh, come on, Bri. I'm just happy to get my big brother all to myself for once," she said, side-hugging me causing us to slow to a sudden stop.

Her breasts were pressing into me and my half-hardon suddenly turned full. Luckily, I wasn't wearing my usual boxers and the Lycra underwear I had on to prevent chafing was doing a great job at keeping the beast from tenting my shorts.

She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me down for what I thought would be a chaste kiss. It wasn't. Although it was far from a "I'm going to fuck you tonight" kiss, it wasn't a kiss a sister gives her brother either. There was no tongue, but her lips left mine wet with passion, and I was left horny and confused.

After she finished, she looked in my eyes, her face completely flushed then pulled on my elbow suddenly to indicate that we should continue our run as if she hadn't just rocked my world.

I looked over at Mom inquisitively and instead of seeing a disapproving look, I saw one of knowing and approval, like she knew something I didn't. I didn't understand what was going on, it was like the two were in cahoots or something. What I did know was that they had a game plan that I wasn't privy to.

"Well, my story's not as interesting as Brian's," she said, continuing our run as if nothing just happened. "My boyfriend asked me to marry him and I said no."

"What?!" I said, suddenly concerned. "Did he cheat on your or something? I'll beat his ass."

"Whoa! Easy Tiger. No, nothing like that," she assured, "Tad's a good guy. I was actually waiting for him to ask me, but when it came time to say yes, I realized that I wasn't in love with him and it wouldn't be right to lead him on."

"Sorry to hear that. You deserve to be with someone you love. You'll find the right guy. You're the most beautiful woman I know, besides Mom."

"You're sweet, Bri. But the problem is that I'm already in love with someone else," she declared, then mumbled, "I just can't be with him."

"Oh," I said densely, "Is it one of your professors at school or something?"

"Something," she said mysteriously.

We kept running in silence for a while, when Amanda suddenly queried, "So, Bro, what was it like to have a porn star for a girlfriend? I already know from Wendy that you're a stud in bed."

Wendy was my previous girlfriend from high school. We parted ways shortly before college not wanting to maintain a long-term relationship, but we did keep in touch over the years. She met someone while attending BYU and got married her senior year. She invited me to her wedding, but I declined because it was kind of awkward and I guess I still had unresolved feelings for her at the time. I kind of lost contact with her and I assume she had a bunch of kids by now as she and I talked about having a large family when we were together.

As for me, I never had anything more than hook-ups and friends with benefits while attending MIT. Most of us going there lived across the country and knew we weren't likely to end up anywhere near each other. The college of engineering had mostly studious nerds that weren't interested in long term relationships. But studious nerd women were some of the horniest and wildest women I'd ever met, and I practically had a harem of them at my beck and call for the four years I was in college.

I looked at Mom and she wasn't any help, "What? I'm curious to know too. It's not like your dad's ever been in porn," she smirked.

I think they were just trying to make me feel uncomfortable. At times, it was a game of theirs to gang up on me. I decided that the only way to win their game was complete honesty. If I was brutally honest it would make them just as uncomfortable as they were making me. Or that was the thought process anyway.

"She was the only woman so far that had a sexual appetite that matched my own. We had sex four or five times a day if we had time. A couple weekends we never left our bed other than to eat and use the restroom. Let's just put it this way, I haven't masturbated in more than two years. Even when she was on her period, she took care of me either anally or with blow jobs. I'm so 'not used' to masturbating now that it's almost like I forgot how and need to relearn it," I said, thoughtfully.

"No, that's not entirely accurate, I know how, I just can't get off doing it anymore," I corrected.

"You made sure she got hers though, didn't you?" Amanda asked, sounding like she was fishing.

"Yeah, Honey. I didn't teach you to be a selfish prick," Mom added.

"Orgasms were never her problem. She orgasmed at least four times for every time I did. I didn't have a problem with technique, size, or stamina - in case you were wondering. According to her I satisfied her. When I asked why she did porn, she said she just wanted to feel wicked and wanton - her words not mine. She got off on being dirty, she said.

"And in case you need to know, our breakup wasn't full of fire and brimstone. There was no revenge. As a matter of fact, we are still friends and text each other once a day. We just aren't a couple any more. And before you ask, no, we don't sleep together either, despite her begging," I said, trying to head off questions I knew they wanted to ask.

"If you two parted on such good terms, why were you moping the first couple weeks you were here?" Mom queried, "You've been back home a couple days longer than Mandy. That means you were locked up in your room a lot longer."

"I'm not going to say that my breakup didn't bum me out. But that PI that gave me the dirt on Casey also gave me some dirt on someone else and I guess I've been procrastinating telling you about it," I said.

"Why? Does it have anything to do with me?" Mom asked. "Because I know I don't have any skeletons in my closet."

"Not you directly. More Dad than you. And when you find out, it will be - upsetting," I said.

"Why won't you tell me?" she asked, worried.

"I will, I just didn't want to have to deal with a lot of arguing and fighting while we are all locked up together," I explained.

"Baby, I'm a big girl. I can handle some bad news," she retorted.

"I know Mom, but not now. I'll tell you tomorrow for sure, I promise."

"Nobody died right?" Mom asked, worried.

"No, Ma, you'll just probably be really angry but nothing like that. If it was that important, I would tell you right away... You're happy right now so let me let you be happy for one more day, OK?" I asked, grinning at her.

"OK, Baby, I trust you... You better tell me tomorrow."