All Comments on 'Assassins MC Pt. 06'

I will say I am pleasantly surprised by the series so far. I've been around quite a bit of this lifestyle both in the club and out. Though not a member I think you've done a very good job so far. I will admit that it first I didn't start reading this because I thought it was a spin-off of the MC computer series. I am pleasantly surprised as I said you done a good job . The only thing I would suggest is notice who is speaking when writing you're doing this for my first person point of view and a few times so far I've noticed you saying I said after one of the secondary characters speaks.

Yes, let me apologize for the dialog. This is my first story, and I wrote it this way, thinking it was clear enough. I am going back and cleaning up the former parts. Let me warn you, you'll have this problem up to part 15, with part 16 having the dialog tags in the correct place. I have the first three parts pending, and I'll be working on editing in between writing the next parts of the story.

Building quite nicely

5/5