Auction

That was how she put it.

I realized I actually did not like Alma all that much after that comment. So I began to ignore her right back. Several more times I saw Alma holding hands with Doug.

I just told myself I didn't care any more.

Then I overheard Doug Dahl bragging in the locker room.

At first I passed that off to his usual big mouth, until he told some of the guys that Alma always wore a "great big" concrete bra with four hooks in the back which I happened to know was true. I had touched those but never got them unhooked.

He also bragged about Alma having the hairest pussy he ever saw which I didn't know about and wasn't sure was true.

No way in hell did Doug Dahl ever get that far with Alma.

"You are full of shit, Dahl!" I growled at him.

"Oh, yeah?" He stood there all puffed up and tense, that might have came to blows but coach yelled at us to knock it off.

The rest of my school year went by uneventfully, I didn't date at all until the Senior prom. For that I asked Paula, she seemed to be extremely happy that I asked her. No way in hell would Alma go with me, she still considered me Cow dung.

Paula wore the exact same dress, I guess I showed some surprise when I saw her in it so she explained with a blush that it was her Mother's and the only really nice dress they had.

I didn't mind, she looked great in it. She also wore it without the clasp, so several times I got glimpses of the upper edge of a lacey matching blue bra. Once when she leaned forward to pick up her soda the top gaped open even more, she put up one hand to hold it back, her eyes meeting mine.

Plus when we danced I could see a lot of the upper portion of her bare right breast, Paula had to know but said nothing.

After the Prom, we went to the all night party. Someone brought alcohol so the other kids were getting drunk and silly, Alma was there but she ignored me like always.

Paula and I didn't do any drinking but my head was fuzzy anyway, I found out later it was from some pot that one of the kids had gotten somewhere.

That was something I knew nothing about, it was close to unheard of back then. There had been a few rumors about things like that but I never saw any of it.

I did manage to get Paula home around 4 AM, her Mother was waiting up for her.

Of course.

Again we had one of those kisses, Paula stepped back slightly and looked at me, then leaned in for another with a smile.

That kiss got pretty involved until I started to stick my tongue in her mouth like I used to do with Alma. Paula moved back very quickly, surprised.

But then she smiled even more broadly, just as on came the porch light.

Strangely, from then on it was Paula that was in my thoughts most of the time.

+++

That Summer I did my lawn mowing, saving up as much money as I could since I had plans to attend the two year community college we had in our town.

I knew I would need to buy books and things like that although the school itself was very cheap.

One hot afternoon I was mowing away, I had my shirt off and was in just a pair of shorts when I looked up and here came Paula on a bicycle.

Wearing shorts and a T-shirt, she was soaked in sweat. She stopped to talk, I had some cold lemonade in a cooler so we sat under a tree and drank some.

We were 19 by then, and we had both matured some. The kiddish nervousness over what to say and how to act was gone, we had an easy chat.

Paula was going to attend the community college herself, with plans to go on and become a nurse.

She told me she had a job starting the next week at the Jones family's general store, and had plans to save up enough money to go to our State college after getting out of the local one.

That part I understood, college cost money and not very many families had any in our mill town.

I still had no real idea of what I wanted to do, though.

When it came time for her to head on into town, she stood hesitantly and looked at me. I was suddenly aware I had no shirt on.

"Brad, would you....like to kiss me? You know, like you did that night after the Prom?" She asked, her face reddening.

I would and I did. And again, it made my head swim. We probably would still be doing that today except Mr. Johnson chose that exact moment to come up his driveway, he looked over at us and we had to stop.

Paula hopped on her bike and took off with a wave, Mr. Johnson grinned at me.

"Girl friend?" He asked.

"Yea, I...uhhh..." I managed, turning red.

"Kind of a hot one!" He smiled and went inside.

Paula? Hot? Well, yes, dressed like that I guess she was.

I finished up the lawn and went home.

It hit me as I lay there thinking that I kind of liked Paula, but I really couldn't afford a girl friend.

But then, Paula and her Mother didn't have much themselves so maybe if we went to the park or the lake, rode our bikes, things like that?

Dating the other girls had always meant spending money on movies, food, taking them to things. So I hadn't been spending anything, saving up and all. Maybe I would have but Alma still was not in the picture. I heard she was dating some, and Doug Dahl was still around, of course.

+++

It was maybe a week later, I got a call from old man Jones. He asked me if I would clear out some brush in the lot behind his general store, since he wanted to expand, build a storeroom back there.

It was all saplings and blackberry bushes, pretty grown up, perhaps 100 feet by 100 feet. He told me he would pay me $200 which was great. I knew I could do it in maybe a week, in between my mowing lawns.

Alma's family owned the house and lot that faced the next street over, there was a low wooden fence between the two lots.

So there I was, chopping and digging, piling everything up to make a big bonfire to get rid of the brush when I looked up and Alma stood there, leaning on the fence watching me.

"Hello, Brad." She said.

She didn't look mad?

So I walked over to talk to her, what the hell. I had been trying all during the last of the school year and got nowhere.

"So what are you doing?" She asked.

"Mr. Jones is paying me to clear out the lot so he can build a storage room."

"I see your girl friend works for him too." She said, eyeing me.

"Paula isn't my girl friend, she is just...just a friend." I answered.

"I see. Well, I forgive you for that." She told me.

I knew what she meant and I wanted to tell her I didn't need any forgiving, but I kept my mouth shut.

"Want some iced tea?" Alma asked.

"Sure, that sounds good."

Alma and I were back to dating, just like that.

Once during the week I saw Paula come out as Alma stood out there talking to me as I worked. She had some large boxes she put into a dumpster, she looked over at us, no expression at all. Then she went back inside.

Alma and I rode our bikes down to a nearby lake, she had a basket strapped to hers. It was fun, we sat and watched as people came up to splash in the water, throw balls back and forth.

She looked hot in her one piece swimming suit, it hugged her body and I kept looking at her. She picked right up on that and was more or less posing.

"Let's go for a walk, get out of this hot Sun." She asked me, reaching for my hand. So we did, heading down a little trail that got us farther and farther away from everyone.

Finally we came to a small clearing, Alma sat down on the grass, I sat next to her. We began to fiddle around a little bit, it didn't take very long and and I had my hands inside her swim suit top.

She let me do that with no resistance at all.

There was no bra there this time, plus it was daylight and I got to see my very first set of real female breasts clearly. I had seen pictures of course, but these were real ones and very beautiful.

I don't know why a woman's breasts are so incredibly erotic, but they still are to me, even today. Back then the sight of them caused an almost painful erection.

When Alma reached out and ran her hands over the front of my bathing suit it became quite clear that I was probably going to have my very first sexual experience.

I managed to get the zipper on the back of her suit all the way down, with some squirming around I soon was peeling that off of her legs.

Then I looked down, Alma had a huge mass of black pubic hair, it came almost all the way to her belly button.

The memory of Doug Dahl bragging in the locker room about that very fact swept into my mind, it brought me to a complete stop.

Doug fucking Dahl, bragging, yes. But he also was telling the truth, there was only one way he could have known.

Just one way.

Alma had her eyes closed, one hand inside the front of my bathing trunks, holding me.

I felt myself go limp.

"What's the matter?" She said, when she realized.

"Nothing." I told her, jumping up. I tugged my suit back into place.

"What in the hell is the matter with you?" Alma demanded. She grabbed her suit and held it in front of her, and she was now mad.

"I..I just can't." I stammered. All I could think of was she had let Doug Dahl see her, touch her...there? In all of the time we were dating she had never even allowed me to get a hand inside her blouse, let alone...that?

"Brad, I'm on the pill if that's what you are worried about?" Alma told me.

I just stared at her. I had heard about that, but the thought never even crossed my mind.

Somewhere in the past few years the world around me had changed. Birth control pills? A war? People protesting that, free love?

All I could think of was that Doug Dahl, the guy I considered an enemy had been with my Alma.

First?

Before she ever even allowed me to...touch her?

Things were best described as icy on the way home, she got out and went inside, not looking back.

+++

I finished the job at Mr. Jone's store and got paid, then went back to taking care of my lawn accounts.

School started and I buried myself in the studies.

There was still that war going on, I didn't know what it was all about and really didn't want to have anything to do with it. Being in college kept me from getting drafted, to me that was a good thing.

Quite a few of the other kids I grew up with either got drafted or enlisted, though. It seemed like everyone was either involved or busy protesting. Not me, I went to class, did my studies, got the best grades I could possibly manage.

I did see Paula at school regularly, we sometimes sat and talked during lunch. She wasn't dating that I knew about and neither was I, the same lack of money was the cause of that of course.

One day Paula asked me if I would like to come to dinner at their place. It was for my 20th birthday. That sounded nice, so I told her I would love to. She appeared to be happy at that.

For only the 3rd time in my life I found myself heading up the driveway to the little trailer park.

Caroline greeted me, again it struck me that if she was turned away I probably could not tell her from her daughter Paula.

Dinner was simple but very good, later Caroline somehow managed to make herself scarce, not all that easy to do inside of the small trailer home they lived in.

We sat on the couch, our fingers touching nervously. There was a lot of tension in the air around us as we spoke quietly.

"Can we maybe go for a ride somewhere?" Paula asked. We did, and we ended up down at the park. It didn't take very long and we were seriously necking.

In between, Paula asked me what had happened between me and Alma, things had ended rather abruptly. At first I beat around the bush but she persisted, so I told her the truth.

"Really? She actually let you....do that? Naked, right out in the open?" Paula asked.

"Yea. I mean, we are grown up now and...you know?"

"I don't know. I heard some of the stories is all. My Mom says that boys will do anything we let them do, and it's up to us to keep them under control."

Playing with Sally's bare boobs popped right into my head and I guess I blushed. She was right there, we probably would.

"You have, haven't you?" Paula asked.

"Have what?" I asked her back.

"Done....sex."

"No, I haven't. Not really."

"What have you done?" Paula asked.

"I...God. Just some kissing and stuff, is all. A little bit of..you know..petting?" It was my turn to blush again.

"I see. My Mom says that some things are OK if whoever I am with is nice and we like each other." Paula was looking straight ahead, I had one arm around around her, the other rubbing her rib cage.

"Do you like me?" She asked suddenly.

"Yes, of course I do."

"Ok. You can touch me some then...if you want to, that is."

So I did, and Paula didn't resist when I put my hand on her breast while kissing her. She also did not resist when I slipped my hand under her blouse after tugging the bottom portion of it out of her waist band. She let out a sigh when my fingers slipped inside the cup of her bra.

"The clasp is in the front." She whispered into the side of my neck when my hand began to feel around in the back.

Her breasts were soft, very soft. Her breathing changed, soon we were kissing and petting frantically. I felt myself come erect, I felt her hand slide across my lap.

Our eyes met, I could see how blue and deep they looked.

It wouldn't have taken very much of that and I might have blasted off in my pants, but Paula sat up, reached into her purse and pulled out a small dish cloth.

"Mom says that guys will be sore and uncomfortable so it's not nice to let them get all excited and just leave them like that." She said, fumbling with the buttons on my slacks.

Now that was a surprise.

That was what Paula did, she masturbated me to climax like it was the most normal thing in the world. She actually expected to, she was ready, right down to carrying a small towel.

Paula was also very clearly enjoying doing that, her breathing picked up as she leaned forward so she could see clearly.

"This feels so good." She whispered to me.

That was my very first sexual experience.

Later, I asked her if she had done that for any other boys, she nodded, not the least bit bashful about that. I had no idea since I didn't know she had even been on any dates.

For some reason I never asked her which ones.

The rest of that year she and I dated. Actually quite a lot. But other than that, it never went anywhere, not really.

Then one day she let me touch her through her panties, then finally inside of them.

"Just outside, Brad. OK?" She whispered, her breath coming in short little gasps.

"OK." I told her. I kept my word, too as I explored her vagina carefully.

From then on, we did that a lot. Then one day we were at her place, her Mother was off shopping and I managed to get Paula completely naked.

I got down there and tried licking her like I had read about in some stories, we got so totally engrossed we never heard her Mother come in.

"OH! I'm sorry." Caroline said as we jumped up and frantically janked on some clothing.

I expected to be chastised for that but Caroline never said a single word about it, she acted like it had never happened.

Still, actually doing it, going all the way never happened. The Paula went off to her nursing school, it was over a thousand miles away so that was the end of our fun.

We told each other that we would begin again once we graduated, we made plans for holidays, things like that.

That didn't happen, of course it didn't.

+++

I had gotten over some of the hangups, a few short months later I met a cute little cocktail waitress named Dorothy.

With her, I had my first complete sexual experience, and I am fairly sure that I was a long ways from being her first. After that ran it's course, there were a few others, mostly just passing in the night types of affairs.

It was at least 4 years later, I was by then married to another young woman I met at a party, and she was now expecting.

Our first union was a bloody mess, so I was well aware that I was her first. We had very quickly became exclusive and we both knew we wanted to be together.

I have to say our life together was very happy, the memories of the past slid further away with every day.

"Brad!" A familiar voice called out to me on the street one day. I looked up to see Paula standing there, all smiles.

We went to a local bar, had a drink and caught up.

Paula had gotten married, but she became a widow. Her new last name was Dahl.

Of course it was.

Doug Dahl never came home from the war. I knew all of that from reading the papers. One of our heroes. All of the silly jealousy, that all went away when I read about it.

"So tell me, Brad? Would things have been different if you and I had made love way back that first time?" Paula asked me finally after we spent a couple of hours talking about all that had gone on.

"Maybe, I don't know, why?"

"Oh, I have always wondered." She smiled, thanked me for the drink and started to leave. Then she turned back to me with a smile.

"Would you like to kiss me?" She asked with a smile.

I would and I did. It was a rather lengthy kiss, too. She leaned back and looked directly at me, I was completely aware of how blue her eyes were.

I felt the familiar stirrings of an erection, that was something I just could not help.

"I always thought so. Too bad you are married now." She said, a wistful look crossed her face, and then she was gone.

On the way home that day, I remember reaching up and touching my lips with one finger. I could taste her lipstick.

Yes, if things had been different, who knows what might have been, where things might have ended up?

At our door, my wife hugged me, pressing her now rounded belly to mine.

"I saw an old girl friend today." I told her. I always tell her everything.

She looked up at me.

"Really? Dinner is almost ready, come on in and tell me all about it." She smiled.