All Comments on 'Awakening Pt. 02'

This storyline is going. Well written, the syntax is great, and the story flow is perfect. Great job and 5 big ones for you. Keep them coming.

Very erotic story, you should be able to go many directions with this story line and your imagination. May I gently suggest you engage the services of at least a proofreader? You have the tendency to use an incorrect word now and then in your stories. For example; "mind" instead of "mine". Someone like "Dont_miss_me" perhaps? Her profile shows she has the background for it and she certainly enjoys your work. Just a suggestion. Please keep writing, you're doing great.

Middle of page. I like your first person style of writing.

This is a wonderful story, and it has amazing potential and I am excited to see where it goes but I would recommend getting someone to proofread before submission. There are a few mistakes and errors throughout the story, thankfully the flow is not interrupted but they are noticeable.

Sorry if I'm too hardh a critic. Firstly, the characters of Amelie & Vickie are really excellent. Your plotline id grest. I'm lovinh this wonderful fantasy.

You MUST get an editor. There are many wording problems, misspellings & grammatical fuck ups. That's what makes the difference between a 4 & a 5 star story.

Also an Incubus is not a being that can be male & female. An Incubus is the male counterpart to a Succubus.

I'm really enjoying the way you tell a story.