All Comments on 'Ayureveda Be Praised'

Nice work keep going

Really hot idea, but your writing is distractingly stilted and unnatural. Try thinking about what each character wants and what the audience wants to hear about and lingering more on those details than more minute things. Also, check spelling in a few places. Try spicing up your sentences a bit by making them more varied in form, not just subject verb predicate. If you got your style a little better and kept up with the great ideas you could be pretty good.