by Strawberry_2051
From such a promising first chapter, it's turned into rubbish! you've lost this reader
Homonyms!!!! (waste vs waist)
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That said, this may be the best chapter, yet. You managed to write past the obvious train wreck of a girl watching her boyfriend have sex with her best girlfriend, and everyone is still happy. (Probably, it wouldn't come close to happening in real life, though.)
Nice fiction.
Starting to get into it now. watch your word meanings. Spell chech will mess you up. Proof read. Good story.
The first ch. was good and had so much promise. I kept reading hoping that you would go back to that but I give up now, sorry.
-read your work and do NOT count on spell check!
-increase the intimacy... cross more boundaries, use mouths and stimulate bottoms and let best friends get friendly with each other...
-you have not lost this reader, but challenge me, surprise me, arouse me!! LOL
Totally unbelievable story line. 18 year olds who apparently have done extensive sexual exploration but have not figured out that Tab A fits into Slot B?
I guess they'd have to learn to sing first. But they're motivated enough to carry the show when it comes to high-schooler sex.