Badger Redd 01

Now, what you can comment on was just where does someone learn how to sneak back into the swing of things, hmm? Because I didn't that right. And am I the only one without laser beam eyes?

And why did Ethan get thumbs up and smirks!

"So, are we all in agreement then? The spandex artifact needs a full authentic review by Mr. Tweed Jacket's team of experts, okay?"

"[Hic] hip, hip, cheerio, Mr. Windbag and in return [hic], I won't recommend that Badger Redd be arrested because he was about 8 years old when he was hanging out in his father's workshop [hic] and he only thought that his dad [hic] was disposing of two ugly holiday coffee mugs [hic], hip, hip, jolly ole London."

"Ahem, and in addition, Mrs. Wilkerson will allow the usage of her retirement meal on the river, river boat and, and, and, wear a slitted evening gown at the helm [hic]."

"Cheerio, ole mate and [hic], someone will leak it to TV3 news just why that purdy boy is named Badger Redd, hip, hip and [hic] give me [reaches out] a little American nookie, Mrs. B, tee, hip, hip, he!"

[Slap, slap, slap, slap]

"And in closing, Mr. Stuff Shirt will recommend..."

"(Psst! Hurry up, Badger Redd! All this hip, hip, hic, hic stuff is starting to sound like $1400 because I just found out, well, I'll back to you with that, but I just found out something and I need my $1400! And clear your throat, Mr. Twice!)"

"[Gup, swallow, oh, Badger Redd Twice!] Ahem, excuse [pop, pop] me since this is actually my gig! But thanks for not arresting me because I just found out from Chang's "Prison Chat" that some people are waiting to see me down in Cell Block E. Anyways [swallow] is 10% for the cracked cup and 18% each for the other two cups reasonable, hmm?"

"(Psst! Badger Redd, 10% + 18% + 18% sounds like $1500 to me because I just found out that nobody cares what the hell I go all "Mookie" about anyways, so, I need my $1500 Badger Redd! Also, why do the people call you Badger Redd anyways, hmm?"

"Hip, hip, cheerio [hic], we can write that down as a staring [hic] point, hip, hip, where is the Champagne lady in the silver dress, hip, hic, hip, hic, hmm ole chap?"

"[Pop, pop] so, somewhere between $650K and $670K then, hip, hip, cheerio, right, Mr. Mustache?"

"(Psst! Badger Redd, you can take my pussy when I'm not passed out!)"

And then Mookie passed out.

And then Mr. Tweed Jacket passed out, ahem, in Mrs. Bentley's hip, hip, cheerio chest, again!

And then Mrs. Wilkinson staggered out of the dingy and dark Den room and then, huh, looked around and then she staggered right back inside and closed the door.

And then the others started to, um, celebrate, but a little closer.

And then, what the hell and SOB, there stood Ethan, giving me that crooked finger wave in front of Mookie's spare bedroom! Which was a freaking décor of horror dead animal head trophy room!

And Ethan didn't care. But I didn't pass out. Until Ethan finished with me.

End Badger Redd 01