All Comments on 'Barry Fox'

This story is one of my favorites and even makes "On Being Proactive" a better read. I was happy to edit this story, and look forward to more great ones from you.

I thought it was brilliant. Forget the connection to the original - On Being Proactive. This was a vivid portrait of a pathetic, insecure, insensitive man who goes through life living so in his own moment that he sees everything in the context of how it affects him. He rationalzies every consequence anyone can mention so that there is nothing wrong with his behavior. Didn't you ever want to see a story from the villain's side? What did Ted Bundy have to say about his behavior? Jack The Ripper? I don't think villains think of themselves as evil. They justify their behavior, explain it away.

No matter how much Barry is confronted with the evidence of the emptiness of his life and the damage he leaves in his wake, including himself, he doesn't get it and will never get it. He will wind up alone with no friend but a bottle and no memories to ease his pain.

How often do we comment to authors that we would like to know about 1) the wife, 2) the husband, 3) the other woman, 4) the other guy? We want to know their story to understand a situation in its completeness. KK has done that and I think it was an excellent job.

but not very interesting to me.

Even the potentially interesting Ch 3 which crossed paths with Proactive was as insipid. It seemed a very fabricated explanation of the time differences in Proactive

It could have delved into Barry's character, but didn't - just gave countless versions of the same story about his pathetic existence.

That said I read it all, but mainly to get to the part about Karen.

I beg to differ with rpsuch and his summation. We all knew from Proactive that Barry was a sleaze, all this did was confirm the fact with several examples of how he continually did the same thing - and that is enlightening?

Others will obviously disagree as usual, but this saga shone not one extra feeble sliver of light which was not obvious from Proactive, on Barry's character.

It digs out another flaw or evidence in the Proactive story.

Tracy did not believe that Barry was a scumbag even after what he did to her in the parking garage to make her miss her deadline to salvage her marriage.

It shows that she was serious about the latest change of plans, showing that she was dumb enough to do that without waiting for a positive acknowledgement from her husband.

I take these as extra evidence that she was so dumb she could never be trusted without adult supervision.

It is sad when there is a moron in the story that the other characters take as a normal maybe even intelligent human being.

Otherwise, this story is nearly perfect.

this is the best you have done. no open ports all tight and tidy. i found it an very exciting read.

again if he is a such a bad guy, what of the married women who simply rolled over for him? where they that stupid? Or where they too looking for the thrill of cheating? life is not alway fair. you cheat because the marriage is missing something. seduction is highly over rated. the woman knows well before the actual date what will happen. At least Ms. Harris had planned for that. she never considered sex with Barry.

while i did find some open ports in "Proactive" this was truly well done. I wish i could write this well. i think i woud have a better chance if you would stop raising the damn bar.

Possibly because i know Barry (there were several at my old employer's, not to mention the owner.) none of these men had to do any bragging. the women did it for them.

again great tale

Now I have to admit. I read this tale on another site before here on Lit.

But that doesn;t mean that I didn't love it there too.

KK has very successfully gotten into the mind of a very hedonistic, self centered maggot and told us HIS tale.

HIS side of the story. It's not HIS fault that they cheated! And he made their marrages BETTER!!

Becouse now they have guilt, Ah dumbass why should they feel guilty if it wasn't WRONG!

Ok got that out of my system.

Now we can see that we were all right in that the wife in Proactive WAS being good...well sorta. But we can also see that he was going to have her no matter what. And if she had continued then yes she would have fallen.

barry is just TOO good in that.

KK is one of the few writers that I get all giddy for when I see that he's posted. And AGAIN I was not let down.

Thank you

Isn't it? The format gives you the structure and you just fill it in.

What I liked about this story was the format. The office visits mixed with the short stories meant that you didn't have to carry a long narrative flow. Sort of scenes from Barry's life.

...you're too easy on the cheating wives. They are EVERY bit as guilty as Barry. They are NOT victims! I'm sick and tired of the women always thinking of themselves as the helpless, mistreated victims of the "rampaging, ravishing" male! He didn't put a fucking gun to their heads! They weren't raped! Why shouldn't they share some responsibility for their own actions and GROW UP! Must EVERYTHING be blamed on MEN? Women need to accept some responsibility for cheating. Furthermore, it's not the sleeping around that is bad, it's LYING and CHEATING, stupid! Enough of this damn reverse double standard that only pins blame on men!

If you are saying that the author of this story went to easy on the women involved you missed the point of the story. While it is true that Barry's lovers are responsible for their own actions this story wasn't about them. It was about him and his actions. The idea that a man like Barry could seduce any womann he chooses is not based in reality. Anyone who thinks that a man can easily change a woman's mind once it is made up hasn't had much experience with women.

Most women would never fall for the lines that Barry uses. They would see right through him. There are enought women out there looking around for some excitement or action outside of their marriage and someone like Barry would appeal to them. These woman would hang out in places wher e Barry would go looking thereby improving his odds of success and with the number of times he was successful he begann to believe that he could have just about any woman.

I also get the impression from the anger express in nserverusmax's comments that he must have had a bad experience in a relationship.

Just reread Proactive and then Barry Fox. I would be remiss if I didn't write to let you know how much your work is appreciated.

While I wasn't crazy about the theme of this story (Barry was just too shallow to make for an interesting character) I truly do admire your work. The stories that interest and intrigue me the most are those that illustrate the terrible aftereffects of adultery - especially the betrayal of the wife. I do have to admit that I am a sucker for happy endings and it is gratifying to find a reconciliation at the end of the story.

I trust that you realize that your fans are legion and eagerly await each new story from you.

Like this story & the one that goes with it.

Would you be interested in doing a treatment on the story some years ago by Argee "How My Wife Turned into a Slut in Five Minutes"? I think it has a number of possibilities & I don't necessarily mean just to repeat the story with a different ending but perhaps a different treatment of the whole story line. I would like to see how you do it.

There was no closure, just Barry still feeling the way he did. It was more of a documentary on Barry's exploits. I still like the documentary, but would have liked more.

Not a bad story K.K. Just one that's a little hard to get emotional involved with like so many of your others have for me. Like to link back to Being Proactive. Sure solved that extra 15 minute question!!! As always appreciate your efforts.

Imagination - conception - delivery - reported in a most readable fashion. Unsurpassed in style and depth.

Few deal with consequence so well - so directly and yet so subtly subdued in this case.

He was hollow, shallow and without a clue or a sense of life's realities. The hammer will fall eventually upon a head full of surprized wonderment. A jealous husband or a despairing woman will end his worthless presence if he doesn't do it himself upon realization of his empty contribution to life.

Heavy work author - as someone said the bar is raised again.

Provoke us again - soon - as you are appreciated for your talent, discipline and theme - With High Regard

I can understand the need to answer the ’15 minute’ question however the rest I found non-entertaining. The doctor’s attitude was too abrupt and the portrait of Barry, well!

The reason I have reservations is because for the last 16 years or so, I’ve worked with a ‘woman’s man.’ I have seen first hand how women, not he, throw themselves at this man. He has been married three times and has a number of children from those marriages. I agree that perhaps he has ‘hang-ups,’ but then how many of us could withstand close scrutiny.

This man is now in his mid-forties and his third wife as recently left him. Just the other day I watched as a woman ‘devoured’ him with her eyes. He is a quiet ordinary guy who is good at his job. I’ve never heard him boast or admit to an affair. When I spoke at length about him to my wife of 44 years, all she would admit was ‘there’s something about him.’

Contracts, deals, and bargains take a minimum of two people.

My regards to you K.K

Robert

You bring up a good point Robert BUT I think you are missing the mark. Let me explain.

There are three different types of men that are talked about when you are talking of extremely ...ah... "active" men like this.

One is a man with that personal charisma, that inner "drop those panties now girl!". Your friend sounds like one of these. He never boasts? Then he is a good guy whom God has 'blessed" with personal charisma with women. Nothing more.

Second is like one of my co-workers. He brags. He actively goes out and seeks out new women every night. One of his mantras is "women with low self-esteme(sp) are the best lays". Now he has slept with married women...but he only found out about the marrage part AFTER he did. When he relates those stories, as he tells ALL of his stories, it's always in the 'Holy FUCK' vein. He just wants them young and stupid. Basicly a dog is what he is. Period.

Then there are the Barry's. He's a preditor. Has your friend actively hunted down married women? I will guess No.

Does he brag about having multiable lady friends to please him? Again No.

Barry's do. I have known barry's or want-a-be Barry's. They are in this for two reasons. Pure hedonism and power.

Power that THEY have been able to do what no one else can do. Take a married woman.

And the hedinisim? That makes it "NOT MY FAULT!" These man, and some women, are hollow inside. Trying to fill a void they don't even know they have with equally empty acts.

At least adulteerers and even self made cockcolds have SOME inner satisfaction that fills their inner voids.

This story is well below your normal very high standard of writing. It just kept rolling on to cyberspace without any reality.

I read the link story "Proactive" and found it to be a very enjoyable story, with your usual flair for writing this genre.

However "Barry Fox" was in my humble opinion a load of crap.

...... how there are some men out there that are exactly like Barry. They don't even consider what they have done to other people. The only thing that they are concerned about is themselves, and how they have been hurt. If you finish this story, I hope that Barry's dick falls off and that he never gets another woman again.

Nice potrayal of a selfish person, and I hope that you give Barry his just deserts in the end. Just like you do to the women in your other stories.

We live in a world of broken straws. Barry is just one of us. As I read the other reader's comments I just marvel at the "psychoanalysis" that they offer to explain Barry. Your story is good. It is involved. Portrays the characters in a realistic fashion. The doctor knows the score but is only mildly interested in Barry as she knows she needs his cooperation and isn't likely to get it. Barry is a broken man in a broken world. Your portrayal of him had me really laughing because of how real and cliche you showed him to be. That wasn't a problem with your writing... it was a strength to show Barry as the cliche person he is. Anyway I really liked it.

I have to confess I only read this story because I hoped it would be linked to "On Being Proactive" I thought the Barry Fox character was despicable in that story and really didn't care to read more about him. Despite your reservations as well as mine the story was well crafted. It also resolved the question in my mind as to why it took Tracy so long to get home. I would have beat my husband back. It also made her further behavior in that story more incongrous. Knowing exactly what Barry was like, why did she resent her husbands actions so much? It just didn't seem plausible. In fact her little trick seemed rather vicious to me. But then in reality, we are not always logical creatures. "On Being Proactive" is one of my all time favorites. Thanks for writing.

Jenny

you've done better

DR. Haverty shook her head and frowned. "Barry, if you can't see how inappropriate that was, you really need more help," she said. "Please find another doctor and continue your therapy."

That is funny. I can believe that a woman wouldn't approve of his behavior. I am not sure that I approve either. However, it is not a total loss for the women. They get an education and perhaps it will take.

she puts money in the parking meter and waits for a gumball to come out

I always enjoy your stories, even when I don't care for the plot. I thank you for sharing them with us. I hope you realize DWornock's posts are more a desperate plea for attention than an actual critique.

but in a good way.

As a man who has played around SOME, nothing like this man, I feel bad about the little I have done. Oh, well. I finally got too old to mess around so that ends it.

I just hope that people keep playing with him and he pisses off a husband that will give him a nice face and balls transplant with a baseball bat.

"As I climbed into my car I realized something important. I had never been to Indianapolis. Maybe I should go up to Indianapolis and see if I could get something going up there." Perfect!!!!!!

A well written story. Punctuation and grammar were excellent. Clarity of thought

was outstanding. But, in my opinion, the content was boring. It was basically,

'I screwed this girl and then I screwed that girl, then I did four women. then I

did these other six women, etc. etc. ad nauseam

As I said, just my opinion.

Nicely written, and probably all too realistic. Once you have no respect or understanding of women, you'll never have any satisfying relationship. I would say that the psychiatrist failed miserably: all she got were salacious stories, and didn't do a thing to try to help this man. Yes, he's a pig, but your job was to increase his self awareness, not kick him out.

...off as such a self-serving, self deluding boob, it might have been funny. As it is, he was simply a tragic, empty husk of a man.

Well done, sir.

And thank you for giving us a view into that kind of abnormal personality.

I sort of hated the story because Berry was one of the worst lowlife individuals there are, even knowing that there are guys just like that in the real world. I'm going to have to pass on scoring this one.

Good story about a very bad person. Barry is irredeemable and the only thing that will fix him is the next pissed off husband putting a bullet in his head.

From experience, Barry’s behavior is quite simply due to his his being a sociopath. Look at his work ethic and its effects on the women, and how carefully and open he was about his activities; very intense.

He has the makings of a very good CEO.

The story here was rather frustrating, more focused on Barry’s renditions and meanderings v.substance.

Good effort.

Who did you think would ever care to even hear Barry's story? Disgusting, not even sad as there is no sympathy for him. Not even interesting. Not sure why you wrote this one?

Bastard husbands should his ass all of them.

He will wear a bullet soon