Beautiful Honesty Pt. 02

Zoe smiled and said, "I hope so Dah."

Aada nodded her head in approval and returned to her kitchen.

While all this was going on, Frank and Sandy were talking with their heads close. Sandy had gotten Frank's attention by kicking him under the table when Ben and Zoe first appeared.

"What?" He said in annoyance. The kick really hurt.

"What?" Sandy parroted. "What?" In a mocking tone.

"Yah." He answered.

"You don't see it? You really don't?" His look confirmed he didn't have a clue what she was going on about, so she continued. "Ben and Zoe."

"I see them."

"Look at her you dummy." Sandy ordered.

He did, then repeated, "What?"

"You don't see that look on her face?"

"What look?"

Sandy spoke softly to not be overheard. "They're together..."

Frank interrupted, "I know."

"No. I mean they're really together. She's been properly laid." Frank looked again and finally saw it as she approached their table. Under her breath Sandy added, "She never looked like that before."

"Good morning." Ben greeted them. "Thought I might see you guys outside at sunrise."

They didn't answer right away, like they were distracted by something, then Frank finally offered, "I watched from bed. Under the covers with my eyes closed."

Zoe said, "We're going to look at a cabin further up north, after your sessions. Ben made an offer on it." Her excitement showed.

"Why wait 'till later?" Sandy asked.

"Yes," Frank agreed, "we went over our presentations with you last week."

They all looked at Ben and he relented with a smile. "Ok then."

When they finished eating the young waitress cleared the table and spoke to Ben. "Gramma said you should wait a few." When he looked at her in question she continued. "I overheard you guys talk about going up north for the day and I told her so she's packing you a lunch."

Frank and Sandy stood up and Sandy said "Have fun. See you later."

Zoe stood and said she wanted to throw a few things into a day bag.

Ben watched them go and waited for Aada. She came out a bit later with a small soft-sided cooler and said, "I made a nice lunch for you and your new girlfriend."

"She's not my girlfriend Dah." He almost added "officially." But his thoughts went further. More than a girlfriend...I hope?

She smiled and spread her hands in a "we'll see" gesture, then went back to the kitchen.

Arriving at his room, Ben was about to call out as he opened the door but didn't when he heard Zoe through the adjoining doorway. She was laughing and engaged in a conversation on her cell and he didn't want to interrupt her. He smiled at how delighted she sounded and wondered who she was talking to. Maybe talking about us? He was savoring that thought when he heard her exclaim, "I can't wait to wake up with you again." She laughed at whatever the reply was.

Ben felt gut punched.

He was quietly backing out of his room when he heard her say, "I'll be home tomorrow evening." Then he closed the door and started down the hall. Passing the door to her room he heard Zoe calling out, "Ben?"

She walked through the doorway between the rooms and was surprised to find he wasn't there. I thought I heard him?

Ben went outside, to where he'd watched the sunrise. He remembered how the loon calls hadn't made him feel lonely this time. I just didn't know yet, what loneliness could be. His stomach churned and he felt like puking. His heart didn't know whether to beat faster or stop. Fuck. He was profoundly pissed at himself. Ridiculous. Fool. He tried to concentrate on the beautiful setting to crowd out his self-absorption. It helped, but not much. We made love. We will again? I'm sure? The Rolling Stones tune, "You Can't Always Get What You Want", played in his mind. And he knew without thinking it over that what he needed was whatever part of Zoe he could have.

He stood, quietly accepting what he knew.

"Ben?" Zo's voice was soft, from ten feet behind him. She came down after seeing him from the balcony and knew something was wrong. She'd stopped before reaching him, unsure whether to interrupt his thoughts. She took several steps closer and spoke again, even more softly, "Ben?"

Even then he didn't turn to face her. He quietly rebuked himself as he thought, you get what you need. He knew. Take what I can get or fuck this up forever. Still, he was afraid of what he might say.

"Are you alright?" Her voice had gone from concerned to dreading. What's happened?

Ben forced a smile onto his face as he turned but the smile slowly became genuine when he looked at her. Zoe. I'd do anything for her. Accept anything. He had to respond to the concern he saw etched on her beautiful features. "I'm ok Zo. Just thinking about some things."

She was going to ask what things but knew he'd tell her if he wanted. He might be thinking about Celeste. Her heart emptied with that thought but she concealed it.

"Remembering when I was young up here."

She knew that wasn't it, at least not all of it. "Do you still want to show me the cabin?" She asked tentatively.

"I do." He answered immediately. They went back to their rooms to grab some things before heading out.

He'd driven his pickup to the conference instead of using a state car because he knew he'd want to see the cabin again. They drove with the windows wide open so conversation was difficult, and that was probably best. Even though their coital union was more intimate and meaningful than anything they'd experienced before - they didn't know what they were now. Ben kept stealing glances at Zoe, with the wind coming through the windows tousling her hair. Forget what I want, what I need is to be part of her life. Whatever part I can be.

Zoe wondered why he'd gotten more distant after they'd been so openly affectionate. Did we go too fast? Is it second thoughts about Celeste?

When they turned from the Forest Service gravel road onto one the service classified as "primitive" Ben had to slow down and conversation became easier.

Do they actually plow this in the winter? Zoe asked.

"Yup. Just before the cabin there's a river and they have a big stand-pipe there for firefighting. They need to reach it if there's a fire because the next closest place to load water tankers is 30 miles away."

Zoe looked puzzled.

"If there's a structure fire in the area they have to bring water in tankers." He explained.

She nodded. Of course. "I love how remote this is. Is there a lot of wildlife?"

"Pretty much everything." Then he changed the subject. "I told the realtor we were coming for a look and he said the owners were here for a few days but would probably be gone before we arrived."

"Who are they?"

"A retired couple in their late sixties. They're torn about selling but only get here a few weeks a year now. Even their grandkids have mostly outgrown coming up, and with their kids and grandkids all moved to Arkansas they've found a nice lake home down there so it's easier to get the family together. The realtor said what they don't like about their Arkansas lake home is that it's on a lake surrounded by homes."

"This one isn't?"

"Nope. Only two other cabins on the whole lake and both out of view. In addition because the lake borders a designated wilderness area, motorboats aren't allowed. Have you ever canoed?"

"No, but I've kayaked." Zoe answered. She was looking at him as they talked and was startled when he jammed on the brakes coming around a curve. She jerked her gaze forward and was stunned by the sheer height of the cow moose standing in the road. It's so tall! It towered over the front of the truck with its front legs splayed wide in a challenging posture.

"A cow with calves." Ben pointed at the calves standing just inside the woods. Even the calves looked big as deer.

"What do we do?" Zoe asked with genuine concern? It's huge!

"We give her room to lead her calves from the danger she thinks we pose." His voice was filled with admiration. "You never want to get too close to a cow moose with a calf."

"She's beautiful!" Zoe gushed as the big animal leisurely turned to follow her calves into the woods. Then it fell into a limber trot and moved off. "So graceful."

Ben watched her joy. Yes. So beautiful. Such grace. He turned away before she looked at him because he didn't want her to see how far gone he was. A few miles later he pointed out the red standpipe as they passed it and then they arrived. A Chevy Suburban was backed up to the two story log cabin.

"I guess they're still here." He said.

"Have you talked with them?"

"No. Only the realtor, so I'm looking forward to this."

They didn't get a response or see anyone when they called and knocked on the back screen door so they walked around the cabin towards the lake. Walking through tall pines on a carpet of fallen needles Zoe gushed even before they got to the lake view. "I love this!" Her head was swiveling between the cabin and the pines above when the lake came in view. "Oh Ben, this is perfect." She leaned into him. They hugged like newlyweds on the threshold of their first home and kissed.

Then he leaned back to look at her. He couldn't have been more pleased by her joy. He even banished her earlier phone call from his thoughts. I'll win her. They kissed again, more deeply, then looked at the cabin with their arms draped around each other. The west and south side of the cabin were dominated by a screen porch and outside deck. From the deck the ground sloped gently to the lakeshore dominated by a smooth rock shelf. There was also a small beach next to an old wooden dock. Zoe squeezed Ben in delight.

They jerked in surprise when a startled female voice exclaimed, "OH!" The surprised voice belonged to an older woman walking with a man the same age. They were naked. Their hair was wet and he carried a beach towel that he quickly wrapped around both of them. They held it in place together. The woman smiled at them. "Caught us coming from the outdoor shower." She said with amusement.

"We're sorry." Ben stammered. "We just came for a look at the property."

"You made the offer." The man said, understanding and as unperturbed as the woman.

She added, "We always share an outdoor shower before we leave. We thought we'd be gone before you arrived."

"We're sorry." Zoe and Ben repeated in unison.

"Nonsense." The man said. "I'm glad we could meet you." He was openly appraising them and so was she, which seemed a bit comical as they stood wrapped in one towel. "Give us a few minutes to get dressed?"

"Of course." Ben answered. "We'll wait on the dock."

As they went that way, Ben's mind was consumed by observations. First, one about the couple. She was a remarkably plain looking woman. Not ugly - just very plain. And he was movie star handsome. The second observation was a look he shared with the man. He sees it too. He sees that they're an older reverse image of us.

"What are you thinking about?" Zoe asked.

"Them."

"What about them?"

"They seem perfect together." He answered, with mild surprise in his voice.

Zoe looked at him curiously, then changed the subject. "When they leave I think we should go skinny dipping."

Always reserved, Ben was going to disagree but realized there was no one else around and besides, their suits were back at the lodge. Then his cock stirred inside his jeans when he thought about Zoe naked again. He smiled at her and said, "As you wish M' Lady."

She was watching him. "It's different," she said, "getting naked in front of you." Seeing the question on his face, she continued. "It isn't casual like at a nude beach. At the hot tub last night, and then undressing for my massage, I wanted to arouse you." She blushed. "I wanted you to want me as a woman." I wanted to feel him inside me. "I think I wanted that for a long time but never admitted it to myself?"

"I don't remember when I didn't want you..." he said as their eyes met, "...as a woman."

They were leaning to kiss each other when the man called out. "Come join us for some tea." When they climbed to the deck he stuck out his hand, "Pete Sorenson, and this is my wife, Emily."

Ben responded, "Ben and Zoe." They all shook hands.

They sat at a deck table where Emily had 4 glasses filled with ice and a lemon wedge. She filled them with tea from a 2 gallon glass jar and explained, "Solar tea. I throw the tea bags in a jar of water and put it in the sun for 4 hours. There's sugar if you want."

As she spoke, Ben realized he was captivated by her and didn't want to look away. He couldn't put his finger on why, or what it was about her. Emily's not a classically beautiful woman, yet she's extraordinarily compelling.

"This is wonderful!" Zoe said. "No sugar for me." She handed the glass to Ben who took a sip and nodded agreement.

"Emily," Pete said, "why don't you show Zoe the inside while I visit with Ben about their offer?"

"I'd love to see it." Zoe proclaimed. Emily motioned for her to bring her iced tea and saw Zoe hand it to Ben for another sip before doing so.

When Zoe left the porch with Emily, Pete cut right to the point. "We're having second thoughts about selling." He said apologetically. "We can't imagine never being here again."

Ben looked at the view and said, "I get that." The men quietly sipped their tea and enjoyed the setting. The surrounding woods was alive with birdsong. "How often do you come up?" Ben asked.

"Used to be almost every weekend year round but now it's only for two to three weeks a summer." Pete turned from the lake to look at the cabin. "It seems wrong that a place like this is empty but we don't like the idea of renting it out to strangers." He looked at Ben. "It needs people who care about it."

~~~

In the great room Emily was showing Zoe the fireplace and got a wistful look on her face. "I would miss never having another massage by this fireplace.

A soft sound escaped Zoe's chest as she imagined Ben massaging her in front of the hearth with the light and crackle of a fire.

Emily saw her reaction and understood what she was imagining. She said, "You two seem really great with each other. How long have you been together?" She regretted asking when she saw Zoe's discomfort.

"Five years," Zoe said, looking at Emily, "as coworkers. That changed only recently." Then she shed her discomfort like it was soiled clothing. "Last night, actually."

Emily smiled warmly. "Honey, if you saw the way his eyes follow you, you'd know that changed a long time ago for him." She waited for Zoe's reaction.

Zoe got a pensive look and said, "I'm starting to understand it changed a long time ago for me too."

Not caring that they'd only just met, Emily hugged her and said "I'm happy for you. C'mon, I'll show you the 4-seasons room, we've got it set up as a bedroom, and then the upstairs."

~~~

"Open to an idea?" Ben asked.

"Sure," Pete answered, "fire away."

"What if you had the place to use like it was still yours, three weeks every year with linens and staples so you'd only have to bring perishables?" He continued when Pete looked amenable, "We could write it into the deed."

"For how many years?"

"Your lives."

Pete quietly considered the offer before saying, "You know...I couldn't turn that down. The same use we have now without worrying the rest of the year about keeping all the mechanicals operating - kind of perfect." He looked at Ben. "In return we'd lower the asking price. How does 15% sound?"

"More than generous. Are you sure?"

"Absolutely." When Emily and Zoe rejoined them, Pete explained what they'd worked out and they immediately agreed it was a good idea. Handshakes and hugs followed.

Before leaving, Pete showed Ben where to hide the key when he and Zoe left. The couples were saying goodbye when Ben was startled by the sound of his cell chirping in his pickup. There'd been no signal most of the way to the cabin but apparently there was a signal now.

"A blessing and a curse." Pete announced. "There a tower on this side of Hawk Hill that you can sometimes connect to." Then he waved and they drove off.

"The office." Ben said when he checked his phone. "And two messages from Celeste." After listening to the work message he said "I have to call Tim from DCI about the investigation. Shouldn't be too long?"

"I'll be waiting on the dock," Zoe answered, "dressed for our swim and catching some rays." She smiled and arched her eyebrows.

"I'll be quick." He was already picturing her.

While Ben made his call, Zoe undressed on the deck. She laid her clothes on a bench as she took them off, and realized that she felt unusually exposed. She felt naked in a different way. In part it was the setting. Nude beaches were natural, but also artificial in a way because they were designated as clothing optional? This is different. She took a body-length cushion from a stack of several sitting on the deck and headed for the dock as she reflected on being nude here. A soft breeze brushed her bare skin as she walked. It felt wonderful and free. I'm naked in the natural world. But she knew it was more than that, much more. I want Ben to see me and fill with the same desire as last night. And he might be talking to Celeste right now, and she might be begging him to try again and...

As she laid the cushion on the dock, Zoe saw Ben in her peripheral vision, watching from the deck with the phone to his ear. Without revealing that she saw him, she reached her arms above her head and stretched. She twisted. Then she stood in profile to Ben and reached behind her in a way that pushed her breasts out. She stayed in profile to bend from the waist and arrange the cushion, using more motion than needed to animate her breasts. When the cushion was ready she knelt on it and went through several yoga postures. In the last one she lowered her face and chest to the cushion with her ass still high like a stretching cat. When she finally laid face down, her heart raced... and she waited.

Everything I did after seeing Ben watching me was blatant seduction. And now I wish I could start over and make it more. I want him to see my need. With her head resting on her arms she peeked. He was still talking. To who? What are we? She closed her eyes.

After fifteen minutes Zoe sensed that Ben's conversation came to an end and peeked again. He was coming down the stairs. Clothed. She casually rolled onto her back like she was unaware he was approaching and then enticingly draped an arm over her eyes. She felt more vulnerable than she'd ever been and the feeling was terrifying and wonderful in the same breath. My heart is naked to him.

He stopped where he shaded her face from the sun and spoke softly. "Zo."

She opened her eyes. With the sun behind him, she couldn't read his eyes but felt him looking inside her, seeing her.

He finally spoke in a hoarse whisper. "God...I love looking at you."

"It's my outfit."

"It's everything about you Zo. It's you."

She lowered her arm from her forehead to her side, and shifted her body in a way that slightly elevated her chest and opened her legs. It was the subtlest possible seduction, and devastatingly irresistible.

Ben removed his shirt and carelessly dropped it to the dock. He worked his shoes off with his feet, unzipped his jeans and pushed them down with his briefs and then bent over to pull them the rest of the way off. When he stood upright his cock stood straight out. He had no thoughts of turning away. Look at me. See what you do to me.