Bee's Story, My Story Ch. 13

But eventually he did come join me in the living room. He said "Good morning" despite the fact that it was almost 12:30, and sat next to me, getting comfortable while I fucked around in Sunset Overdrive. Eventually I quit the game and had the foresight to do something very different. I figured this could turn into a big conversation that would be difficult to remember completely or attempt to paraphrase, so I started recording a voice memo on my phone, placed it face down on the arm of the couch, and turned to face him.

"Hey." I started.

"Yeah?" He asked, checking a message on his phone.

"We need to have a talk." I said solemnly.

I practically felt him bristle, and he turned his phone face down and looked at me, looking nervous. "O-Kay...?"

"It doesn't have to be bad, but... we've needed to have this talk for a while." I added, trying to soften a little.

He looked at me, his eyes big, almost pleading. Despite how mature and masculine he looked normally, despite him being physically bigger than me in almost every way. He actually looked small at that moment. It made me second guess myself. But I swallowed the notion and reached for his hand.

"I love you. You know that, right?" I started.

"I love you, too." He answered quietly. I realized he must have thought I was about to scold him for something. Or cut him off of everything we'd been doing physically. And then I realized that depending on the way this conversation went, I could very well be doing that. Now I was nervous too.

"I'm never going to love another person the way that I love you, you know?"

He nodded.

"The past couple of weeks have been... a lot. Unexpected, and- and exciting. And I don't regret any of it, and I don't want it to stop, but I need to make sure we're on the same page."

"Okay?"

I caught my breath to keep from just pouring everything out. "First off, how do you feel about things? With me- with us?"

"Oh my god... it's incredible. I feel so much closer to you than I ever thought possible, and I feel like the luckiest, like I have the best sister on the planet. I just want to make you happy because you make me so happy already."

I smiled. "I feel that way too, I love how close we've been. And you've made me so happy! But as far as the sexual stuff, how do you feel?"

"I mean... I know it's... I shouldn't. But I do. It's hard to describe. I've listened to my friends drool over you for as long as I can remember. And it made me jealous... It made me wish I could talk about you like that. Because I've always thought you were beautiful, and I've always wondered what it would be like to-" he got quiet.

"To what?" I asked, blankly.

"To get to love you physically. To be able to love you in every way. You know?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Well, I just, I want to make sure you're still okay with what we do. If any of this is weird for you, we can stop, and go back to being a normal brother and sister again."

"I don't want to, I mean, I would if you wanted to, but I'M okay with this, and I don't want to stop. I want you."

I nodded again. "Okay, well... I also need to make sure you understand that... we can't be like... a COUPLE couple. Everything about this has to stay in the privacy of our home. And also, I don't... I don't want that with you-- I mean, I don't think you're my one, that I want to marry, and have kids with and spend the rest of my life with, because I DO want that, eventually, with someone. But I just want to be your sister. I want to be your sister and still get to make you feel good, and to enjoy you, and to be intimate with you. Because it doesn't feel wrong to me, it doesn't feel wrong at all, it feels so good, and I just want more and more. I love you, and I want to be able to show you that in every way. If it's here, if it's just between us, I feel like we should be able to love each other however we want." I had to stop myself and catch my breath.

He was quiet for a bit, contemplative, and he squeezed my hand. "I get it. I'm pretty sure I'm on the same page. Despite everything, I've never pictured this leading to like... us being in a full on relationship or marriage or any of that. I know that's, like, a long shot even if we DID want that with each other. But I feel the same way, I want to be able to love you like this, and help you with your milk and get to make you cum, and just be close and intimate. I never expected any of this, and I still can't believe it's happening, but I don't ever want to stop, because it feels so natural now, getting to be this way with you. I never forget who you are, and it only makes it more special to me. You said you're never going to love anyone the way you love me? Well, I'm never going to love anyone the way I love you either. You're my sister, you're important to me, you've been there for me my entire life. And I know all of that should make this weird, but it really doesn't. I'm not blinding myself to finding like- the love of my life or something, but right now, all I care about is you, and how much fun it is to be with you, because I trust you more than anyone, and I know you're not going to just... break my heart, that you'll always be there for me and not just walk out of my life the way anyone else could. This isn't like you're my soul mate or something, it's definitely different, but it's equally as important to me."

I let him say his piece, mostly because I was fighting back tears. I felt my heart swell in my chest. I squeezed his hand back. He hit on something I hadn't found the words for, but it made so much sense. "I'm so glad you understand! Fuck. I feel the same exact way. I trust you more than anyone else. I know you won't hurt me, and that you love me unconditionally. And that just makes me want to give you everything. And it makes me want you so badly. I feel like the last few months have brought us so much closer and I don't want to lose that while we can enjoy it. Obviously if I do find someone I want to marry, we're going to have to figure that out, same for you, but I feel like even if we cut off that intimacy, the experience will still keep us close and obviously I'll still love you just the same." I was full on crying now, and I sniffled and wiped my face with the sleeve of my hoodie. I was just overwhelmed with emotion. He squeezed my hand and held it until I had gathered myself.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

I laughed awkwardly. "Yeah, actually. I was dreading having this conversation, so I'm glad you understand so well."

He nodded. "Look, I'm not stupid. As crazy as everything that's been happening is, I know we're limited in how far we can take things. And I'm fine with that, this is so much more than I could ever have dreamed or asked for, so I'm not going to complain. I'm okay keeping it to myself and enjoying what we have in private." He laughed a little bit. "But I will admit, whoever gets to wife you up is going to be a fucking lucky son of a bitch."

I socked him in the shoulder. "Shut up!" I did laugh though. "I'm so relieved that you understand and are on the same page, you have no idea." I finally dried my eyes and finished sniffling. "I love you. So much."

"I love you, too." He replied, chuckling softly. I knew we were repeating ourselves, but I couldn't help it.

Once we calmed and fell into a silence, I exhaled heavily and decided to take advantage and address the next item on the agenda. "So, do... you want me to be your first?" I asked, nervously rubbing my hands on my yoga pants, just in case they were sweaty.

He looked at me, studying my face as if waiting for me to admit I was just fucking with him. "I- uh... I wasn't sure if we were going to go that far, to be honest."

"I'm... I'd like to, if you're okay with that, if it's something you'd want with me--I don't know--If-If you're okay with losing your virginity to your sister, I mean." I felt like my skin was burning up I was so uncomfortable having this conversation.

"I'd rather it be with you than anyone else. I seriously can't think of anyone better... I've never wanted it more with anyone else. Are you serious?"

I looked at him with my head cocked. "After all that we've already done? After everything we were just saying? Of course I'm serious."

"Oh-.... wow..." He said, incredulously as if in a trance.

I laughed a little, but needed to stay serious for a little longer. "I just want you to be sure it's what you want, I don't want you to do something in the heat of the moment that you'll regret later. I don't want us to make a mistake, I don't want to lose you because of that."

"It's not JUST about ME, you know?" He jumped in, "I don't want you to do something with me that you'll regret or just because you think it'll make me happy. We don't have to do any of the things we've been doing if you don't want them as much as I have. But I DO want you. I want you to be my first. I don't want to lose you either, but I think as long as we both know what we want and don't want, as long as we're in sync, that won't happen, and so I'll have no regrets." He ran his hand through his hair as soon as he stopped talking, as if he couldn't stand keeping still and waiting for me to weigh in.

I just... felt so nervous but also warm and turned on and like I could have let him have me right there. But this had already been a lot to digest and process without just doing everything at once. "Well, good. Now that we've established that, I feel a lot better. How about you?" He nodded and smiled slowly. "Let's take it easy for today though, okay? That conversation was a lot, I just want to chill for the rest of the day, please....Plus my face probably looks terrible after all of that."

"Would you believe me if I said I thought you looked even more beautiful?"

"Not even slightly... but thanks for trying." I replied, not missing the way he rolled his eyes and shook his head in exasperation, it made me smile. We both knew I was just being difficult for the fun of it. I went to my bathroom, stopped the voice memo, double checked that it recorded the whole thing (17 minutes and 44 seconds!! despite feeling like it lasted over an hour), and washed my face, deciding to apply some light make up so I could feel a little better about myself. I took off my hoodie, threw it on my bed, and put my hair in a loose ponytail before returning to the living room.

He was making himself some toast when I came back, and I went back to playing Sunset Overdrive while he ate. We loafed around most of the day, neither of us could settle on a game we wanted to play despite really wanting to play something, and eventually we settled on binging GLOW season 3 (shoutout to Betty Gilpin and her fantastic T&A). The opening montage for the second episode was a little awkward after the conversation from earlier, because I'm pretty sure it got us both thinking, but we didn't act on anything.

He ended up having to leave for an hour or two to meet with his group because they were having some sort of issue with their files and needed face time to get it cleared up or something. I took advantage and had a nice leisurely bath with the lights off and a little music. I wasn't sure when he'd be back so I ended up milking myself in the bath and enjoying myself a little. By the time he came back I was in a fresh camisole and panties, and had just let my hair down. He filled me in on what happened with his group, and then we watched Detective Pikachu (that Bulbasaur scene fucking destroys my heart every time) before saying 'goodnight' and going to bed. I let out a heavy sigh when I finally laid down, like I'd been holding my breath all day. I think it was just the relief from the conversation being over and done with finally hitting me. Now I just need to transcribe this voice memo so I can delete it.

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Tuesday, August 13th 2019

On Sunday I had to come in to work for a little bit because someone who was going to be going to Gamescom this coming weekend had an emergency come up, and I was going in their place to help with a presentation. It was sudden and it would mean going to Germany for about a week. I have to admit it had me a little stressed. I had to update my passport, and run through the presentation a few times yesterday and today, probably even more over the week, as well as get an itinerary, and make sure my brother had everything he needed for the week.

I've never been to this particular event so, while I'm honored they wanted ME to go, it's just a lot, on top of a GameStop event I have to go to almost immediately after returning. I'm good on a stage/during a presentation for keeping audience attention, having good stage presence, and I think sometimes they just like to have a woman as a forward facing representative for the studio.

This meant I hadn't spent much time with my brother over the past few days. I had met him for lunch yesterday, but I spent that evening prepping my wardrobe for the trip, and making my list of things to pack. By the time I was done, he was in his room playing whatever it is he plays on his PC (probably Apex). Today I came home at my normal time though, and he was weirdly excited when I arrived.

"Hey! I was hoping you'd get to come home on time today!" He said immediately when I stepped in.

"Oh yeah? Did you have plans for me or something?" I replied, a little distracted. Honestly I had been a little MORE stressed because there were issues with the travel arrangements on the way there, it took all day to get something sorted, and I would be flying alone. I'm used to flying, but not internationally, and I feel so much more comfortable having a travel buddy. It's harder for me to fall asleep next to a total stranger. I was able to keep the seat the studio had already bought for the return trip at least.

"Not quite," he started, snapping me out of my thoughts, "But I did get something for us!" He fished into a target bag on the counter and pulled out a 36 count (!!) box of condoms.

"Oh, OH WOW." I responded in surprise. I felt my brows raise and my cheeks flush.

"I thought it might be a good idea to get these just in case!" He seemed very pleased with himself. And honestly, it was very sweet of him to think of. I forgot he obviously would have no idea that I'm on birth control. I started like a month or two before he moved in, MOSTLY because I didn't want to deal with being on my period while living with him, and also with admittedly wishful thinking at the time -- just in case. But also the realization hit me that this was going to happen, and I felt my stomach tighten for some reason. I think I'm actually having nerves about the whole idea because of his size...

"Nice! Good thinking."

"Are you free for the rest of the night?" He asked, full of hope. Oh man, I felt bad because I could tell he really wanted to get there but my head just wasn't in the right place.

"I'm sorry, I have some emails I need to respond to before I can do anything. But if you want to go grab some food for us, I'll try and get it all knocked out so we can hang." I offered cheerfully.

He nodded, at least he didn't seem disappointed. "Okay, just text me what you want!" He went to his room to grab his wallet and keys, and I went to my room to change and send him the text. I finished up the emails while we ate and did the dishes before returning to sit with him on the couch. We talked for a bit about my upcoming trip, and about his plans for while I would be gone. I had let Kelly know he would be alone all week so she could be a sort of emergency contact for him. He asked about my itinerary and hotel accommodations. Unfortunately I was the only woman going, and because of the event, there were no options, I would have to share a room with one of the guys from work. He had offered to see if he could find someone willing to let him use their floor so I could have the room to myself, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to make him do that, and said we'd figure it out later.

"What are you going to do about milking?" My brother asked.

"Take really long showers I guess." I answered, laughing awkwardly.

"I wish I could go just so I could help you with that." He said dreamily.

"I know... You could help me with it now if you'd like." I offered. Realizing I was actually pretty full. I started to play with my boobs, weighing them and hefting them through my top.

"Yes please." He replied enthusiastically. I pulled my top over my head and tossed it aside.

"...So fucking beautiful..." I heard as the top passed my head, possibly missing part of what he said. I felt my face and chest heat up. I never get tired of that reaction from him. I absolutely love how much he loves my tits. We assumed the position and he quickly latched on to my now aching nipple. The milk started flowing fast and I let myself relax as he relieved the pressure for me. I cradled his head a little, rubbing my thumb in his hair, while my other hand played with my free breast.

My hand caught his attention, and when he saw what I was doing, he groaned a little against my skin. I looked beside me to see the tent in his pants growing rapidly, and I bit my lip. I let go of my boob and reached for him, running my hand up and down his heat, while he switched nipples. I squirmed under him as his tongue started to deliberately tease me, flicking my nipple as he sucked, sending sparks between my legs. He was really trying to amp me up, and it was definitely working. I felt myself getting closer and closer to the edge, biting my lip, and losing my focus as I rubbed him. But just as I was about to crest, my phone started to ring.

"OH FUCK" The startling sound combined with his attention set me off and I had a small orgasm, somewhat stifled by the realization that it was our mom calling, I had just told her that I was going to Germany next week as I was leaving work, and she was just now responding. Once I was able to think a little more clearly, I spoke up.

"I'm sorry, she's just going to keep calling, we should get this over with." I said, clearly frustrated. He groaned and agreed. We spent the next hour or so talking to her, Dad, and unfortunately also Grandma who they were visiting. Needless to say it was a bit of a mood kill. While my brother was talking to my parents, I made an apologetic face and let him know I was going to go shower. It was getting pretty late, and I didn't want to risk things escalating only to have to get up early for work. I finished milking in the shower, did my skin care routine and came back out to find him browsing the PlayStation store.

"I'm sorry we got interrupted..." I said softly.

If he was actually frustrated, he did a great job hiding it. "It's okay! I know you had a lot on your mind tonight, I'm just glad I could get you there at least once."

I smiled, "Thank you for that, by the way. Do you want me to take care of you?" I offered.

He looked embarrassed. "Actually I was pretty pent up, so I took care of myself while you were in the shower. So you don't have to do anything if you don't want!"

"Oh, I'm sorry! I'll make it up to you later this week, I promise! Hold out for that if you can!"

He bit his lip and looked at me, nodding. "Definitely." He smiled, and I had to try not to melt then and there. I sat next to him and watched him play some Tetris Effect before turning in for the night. Between him trying to be responsible and getting protection, and showing patience and understanding tonight... I found myself wanting to give it to him that much more.

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Thursday, August 15th 2019

I was all packed and everything was all sorted out at this point. Work was super busy and frantic with the last minute preparations, but I did get to leave an hour early to spend my last night with him before flying out tomorrow morning to start the 13+ hours of flying. I took advantage and ran last minute errands and made sure I was all good by the time he came home from classes today, so when he arrived, I was already lounging on the couch in lacy panties and an unzipped hoodie with my hair down.