All Comments on 'Ben and Sheila'

Are Ben and Sheila robots? The telling of this story is very structured and regimented: "asked Ben ... replied Sheila ... said Ben."

When the characters are alone, it's easy enough telling who's doing what to whom without the labels.

The whole thing less sexy than an anatomy textbook.

To be erotic, explore all the sensations: color, light, texture, sound, scent ...

If this story were fabric, it would be starched canvas. You writing needs more satin silk.

The spelling, grammar, and tenses all need serious improvement.

Bad spelling, bad grammar, bad text. This is simply dreadful drivel. Next time get someone other than yourself to check it over.

I couldn't get past the first three paragraphs there were so many mistakes.

Rather repetitive with poor spelling