Ben Loves a Challenge Ch. 13

Ben's ass was a little sore, but it had been worth it. He lay in Dean's bed long after his shower, really not feeling like doing anything but existing in the near vicinity of Dean. He buried his face in Dean's pillow and breathed in, then rolled over so he could watch his boyfriend.

Dean played some game on his computer, he'd been considerate enough to put headphones so Ben could rest. Watching Dean play felt slightly voyeuristic, seeing this part of his boyfriend had him feeling good, or at least fought off the feelings that he knew he was going to have to confront eventually.

He was dozing when he heard Dean's phone ring. Dean didn't notice it with his headphones on, so Ben kicked at his chair, sending Dean spinning. Dean looked at him with an annoyed scowl then laughed and turned to go back to his game.

"Your phone!" he barked, holding his hand up to his ear.

Dean nodded. "Sorry," he apologized, taking his headphones off. He looked at his phone's display then his eyes bunched up and he looked at Ben quizzically before he slid his finger across the screen. "Um, hello?"

Ben could tell the caller was female, but he couldn't hear anything she said. "Ah, yes?" Dean answered her first question. "Yes. Wait, who is this?" Dean listened to the answer and then looked up at him sharply.

"Who is it?" he whispered.

Dean put his hand over the phone. "Your sister Molly," he hissed, then returned to the phone. "He's here."

His stomach turned to lead. How did she have Dean's number? Was she calling to disown him, too? He couldn't handle another of his loved ones rejecting him right now. "Hang up," Ben whispered. "I can't, Dean. I just can't right now."

"No," Dean said, but not to him. "He's not in a good way right now." He could hear his sister talking, but still not what she was saying, and that was killing him a little, too. "No, he's with me. No, at my house." He paused. "If you already knew he wasn't home then why did you ask if I-" His sister said something and Dean sighed. "You're definitely siblings," Dean told his sister.

He heard her laugh, and if she was laughing it couldn't be, she probably didn't hate him like his mom... His throat grew tight again. "Hang up," he said, still uncertain enough that he didn't want to risk it.

Dean waved him away, shaking his head no. "No, you can't come here. He's not..." Dean listened again. "Yeah, that might work. I need you to, no, listen, seriously, woman, I'm-"

Ben exhaled slowly, then chuckled, Molly was still Molly. "It's okay, Dean. Let me talk to her."

Dean looked up at him sharply. "He'll call you back," he barked, then stabbed the red circle on his phone harder than it deserved. "No."

"Okay."

Dean opened his mouth, then closed it again, only to purse his lips before opening it again. "You don't even know what I was saying 'no' to," Dean complained.

"Does it matter?" Ben asked. "You said no, and I trust you."

Dean sighed again. "You're killing me, DeLuca." Still, he put his phone on his computer desk and got up, then sat down next to Ben's knees. "Sit up, yea?"

Ben did, then leaned against Dean. Dean relaxed into him, which made him happier than it should. It had taken him so long to get Dean to open up to him, to be comfortable like this that he wasn't gonna take it for granted. "Thanks," Ben whispered, trying to memorize this moment in time before he had to go back to everything else.

"Thanks for what?" Dean asked, sounding sad.

Ben slid down his side and curled into a ball, his head falling to Dean's thigh. Dean's fingers sank into his hair and he was sure Dean didn't realize he was petting him. It made him feel special. "For all of this, for last night, and all of today. For being here for me, loving me even though it's not easy."

Dean snorted a laugh. "Loving you is too easy, Ben. That's part of the problem."

He rolled his eyes. Dean was Dean, and he loved this part of him, too. He just loved Dean, all the parts, every one of the parts. "I know, I'm just too loveable. But for now, I'd just like to be loveable for you. I'm just gonna live in your bed forever, is that okay?"

Dean's fingers flexed in his hair. "You can't live in my bed forever."

Ben looked up and saw those rosy cheeks he loved so much and smiled, then raised his finger up and touched Dean's nose. "Boop!"

Dean caught his finger and bit it, then sobered again in the next breath. "Your sister's at your house."

"How'd she have your number?" he asked. "Wait, what? She's at my house, why's she at my house? Do you somehow know my sister?"

Dean rolled his eyes. "I don't know your sister. She called from your phone. She wants to talk to you." As if to prove his point, Dean's phone buzzed on his computer desk. "That's probably her."

"Yeah, she doesn't like being hung up on," Ben agreed.

"She reminds me of someone else I know," Dean noted.

Ben snorted. "I have no idea of whom you speak."

Dean scratched his head playfully, then pushed him off his lap and stood up. "She wants to talk to you. Are you..."

"Not really," he admitted, fighting off the depression that circled around him like hungry hyenas. "But, she's not gonna let up, especially if she already drove up here from mom's house. I mean, Tampa is already like a two hour flight, and then on top of that with three kids... it probably feels more like a ten hour flight, especially since Dwayne isn't here..."

"Dwayne?"

"My brother-in-law. Deployed in Afghanistan right now, eighteen month deployment, so she's doing the single mom thing currently. I told her not to marry a career soldier."

"Oh," Dean said. His phone stopped ringing and he handed it to Ben. "You should decide. I don't have the right to tell you what to do, not, ah, well, yea."

He pushed Dean's phone away. "I'm not ready," he admitted, swallowing down the bile that was climbing his throat.

Dean nodded. The phone rang again. Dean swallowed hard, then answered it. "Put my stupid brother on the phone, Dean," he heard his sister snap. "It's cold as balls out here. Either that, or tell me where you live so I can come there. Did I mention that it's cold as balls here, Dean? I moved away from this hellhole for a reason, and fucking cold as balls here is one of them!"

Ben blinked a few times, then snorted out a laugh before Dean could think up a good response. He took the phone from his stunned boyfriend's fingers before Dean could stop him. "Hey Molly," he said, trying to sound less afraid that he actually was. He hit the speaker button, too afraid to do this alone.

"Ben! Holy fuck balls, Ben, what the fuck?"

He swallowed hard, his stomach churning. "So, ma told you?"

"She's lucky I needed a break from my kids or I probably would've been a lot meaner than I was. What the everloving hell is wrong with her! I can't believe it, I can't believe she kicked you out. Your poor cat is crying non-stop, and Jamie won't stop asking about Mr. Rice Uncle, so thanks a lot for teaching him that on our last Zoom call, by the way."

"I, what now?" he said, trying to process everything all at once and failing. "I mean, Mr. Rice Uncle is pretty funny." Dean looked at him, worried, but also confused. "Jamie's three, and I'm Uncle Ben."

Dean blinked a few times, then snorted out a laugh. "You're an idiot," he whispered.

"Oh, so I'm on speaker now? Good. Is Dean your boyfriend?" she snapped, sounding pissy. She really did hate the cold.

"How'd you know?" Ben asked, still confused by the whole call.

He could practically hear her rolling her eyes. "First, he's the only person you've called in weeks, other than me and mom, and the vet. So, obviously I'm gonna call that number first. He answered and said you were there. Where else would you go, if it wasn't home?"

"Aren't you just a regular Sherlocka Holmesetta?" He said, still uncertain about where his sister stood on his recent life changing events.

"You mean Enola Holmes? You don't need to feminize Sherlock, he had a sister, idiot." She snorted, probably amused with herself. "Have you had lunch? We need to, I mean, I just wanna talk."

He swallowed hard. "I'm not sure I'm-"

"Bring Dean," she instructed. "I wanna meet him, and I wanna talk to you."

He looked up at Dean, who shrugged, then took his hand and squeezed it comfortingly. "I don't know if I'm ready, Molly."

"Ready for what, Ben? To talk to your sister who loves you, no matter what? Come to lunch, Ben. I want to meet your boyfriend, I know he's right there. Dean, I wanna meet you, come to lunch, too."

"Molly," Ben hedged, "I'll meet you, Dean, ah, has plans. Where?"

Dean looked at him, one eyebrow raised in question. He ignored it. "I don't care where, Ben. And he doesn't, because I know when you're lying."

Ben sighed. "Look, he's not-"

"I'll come," Dean spoke over him. He looked up sharply, but Dean wasn't looking at him. He was staring a hole into the black screen of his phone.

"Good. I'll text Dean the place, meet me in half an hour. See you soon, Ben." A second later his phone screen lit up as she hung up.

"You wanna go?" Ben asked, his head still spinning from the conversation. "You said you didn't wanna meet my family. I didn't want you to feel like you had to."

Dean put his phone down and pulled Ben into his arms. "I'm not gonna make you do this alone. Not this time. I feel terrible about-"

"I made that choice, Dean," Ben interrupted. "Not you. You, well, it's just not your fault. That's that. No arguments."

Dean watched him carefully for a moment. "Yea, okay. Sure. I, whatever you need, Ben. I should get dressed. What should I wear? Is your sister, is she gonna be okay with me? With us?" Dean stood up and began pacing in small circles.

Ben laid back and looked up at Dean's art, the thick red paint with black drips everywhere. He could see Dean in the painting, his anxiety and guilt over who he was. It was enlightening. "She said she loved me no matter what. I think she's, she said she's mad at mom. Yeah, she's okay. I think it's gonna be okay."

Dean pivoted around quickly. "No, don't give me hope, Ben. Don't hope for something you don't know the answer to yourself! It's not fair."

Ben sat up, then stretched before he stood up. Dean's eyes caught on the sliver of his belly that peeked out during his stretch. Ben saw him swallow hard before he turned his eyes away.

"Hey," he said, taking Dean's hand. "Trust me for once."

Dean whined a little in the back of his throat. "I can't, Ben, I do trust you. I can't bear to be the reason-"

"You're the reason I'm okay now, so just, like, I dunno, Dean. Relax. It is what it is, yea?"

Dean's face clouded over and he saw Dean trying to resist the urge to argue. It was just who he was. Dean pulled his hand away and stalked to his closet, sliding hangers back and forth angrily.

"Don't be mad at me," Ben begged. "Please?"

"Not mad at you," Dean snapped. "I just, god, this is so stressful! I just want something to go right for you, for us. I want this to work out so bad. I want you to still be here in a year. In five." He finally decided on something, ripping it from the hanger so hard it backlashed into the wall before falling to the floor. Dean ignored it.

"I like that shirt," Ben said, opting not to comment on Dean's insecurities. "It looks good on you."

Dean's rosy cheeks bloomed and Ben felt a flutter in his chest. "Thanks," he said bashfully, pulling off his t-shirt. Ben watched, not even trying to hide that he was enjoying the show. Dean's cheeks grew brighter and he turned away as he pulled the shirt over his head. Ben watched his back, thinking about how it would feel to trace his spine. With his tongue.

Now his face was red, but Dean wasn't facing him to see it. "Oh. Fuck."

Dean whipped around. "What now?"

"I don't have any clothes here," Ben noted. "All I have is what I wore here yesterday."

Dean looked around, spotting Ben's clothing on the floor by the bed. "Jeans should be fine. Underwear too, if you don't mind wearing them again today. The shirt, though..."

Ben picked it up and frowned as it stuck together in places. Somehow they'd gotten cum on it, though he didn't remember when. "Um, yeah, this isn't gonna fly. Um..." He looked up at Dean.

"Anything you want," Dean said, turning away, his cheeks flushed again. "Just pick something out, anything you want."

Ben bit his lower lip, his chest too full. Dean was pulling on a fresh pair of jeans as he picked through Dean's closet, eventually settling on a navy polo shirt. He pulled it over his head and struggled to get it on, he'd forgotten to unbutton it. He heard Dean sniff a laugh, then Dean's fingers were prying the buttons open.

He pulled the shirt down and tugged it over his chest, it was a little tighter than he would've liked, and a little longer, too. The way Dean's eyes traced his torso immediately changed his mind, it was the perfect tightness. "Boyfriend shirt," he announced, stepping into Dean's space before stealing a kiss. He retreated before Dean could respond.

"You're such a dork," Dean said, his rosy cheeks distracting him in a good way. Ben pulled on his underwear and pants from the day before, then searched for his socks. Once he was dressed he stood up, brushed his pants off, then turned to Dean. "You look good," Dean answered his unspoken question.

"Thanks," Ben said with a nod. "You ready?"

Dean shook his head. "Can you ever really be ready for something like this?"

Ben shrugged. "Prolly not. I mean, let's go, okay?" Dean looked scared, so he took his hand and squeezed. "Hey, it'll be okay-"

"You don't know that!"

He rolled his eyes, still holding Dean's hand. He gave it another squeeze. "It'll be okay because we're doing it together."

Dean exhaled slowly, then nodded. "Yea. Okay. Yea. Sure. You driving, or you want me to drive?"

His sister was waiting for them inside the restaurant, she'd texted Dean that she'd gotten them a table. The place was dead, probably because it was the Wednesday before thanksgiving. He practically had to drag Dean to the door, and he understood his hesitation, but it was still a challenge. Dean looked like a wild horse ready to bolt at any sound at all.

"Hey, you don't have to do this," he said, stopping them just before the glass doors. "You can leave, come get me after. You don't have to do this, Dean."

Dean looked at him in a mild panic. "No, Ben. I'm doing it. If you're going, I'm going, too. It's just, I've never done this before, yea?"

Ben snorted. "Me either. Well, I've done it half-way once, but never the full thing."

Dean rolled his eyes and Ben knew he was relaxing, even if it was just a little bit. "Wait, aren't you supposed to be working today? I'm, fuck, Dean. I'm sorry."

Dean shrugged. "I called off. This's more important, and I had the time off anyway."

"Still..."

Dean took his hand and squeezed it once, hard, before he released it. "Let's get this over with, yea?"

Ben nodded. "Yea. Hey, Dean?"

"Yeah, Ben?" Dean asked, pausing with his hand on the door.

"I love you," Ben replied. Dean's cheeks flushed pink and he smiled big, his heart feeling less ragged. "Let's go."

"You're killing me, DeLuca," Dean muttered, pulling the door open. "After you."

Ben snorted a laugh, then stepped inside the restaurant. A warm, bacon-scented wind enveloped him and he took a second to breath it deep, trying to find his calm. Bacon always helped. He looked around, scanning the room for his sister, but he didn't see her.

"Hey, y'all," said a girl, she couldn't have been out of high school. "Two?"

He smiled at her, but it was fake. "Nah, meeting my sister here. She said she's here already?"

The girl nodded. "Yeah, right this way," she said, picking up placemats and rolls of silverware. She led them around the restaurant, never checking back to see if they'd followed her. She stopped in the back corner at the last stall before the bathrooms. "Here you are, Bethany will be by for your order in a bit." Mission accomplished, she turned without waiting for a response and walked away.

Molly looked up from her phone, looking tired and irritated. She smiled at him, then turned her full attention to Dean. They both squirmed as she studied him unabashedly. He sat down and pulled Dean down next to him just to cut the awkwardness. "Hey, Molly," he said, unzipping his coat.

Dean followed his lead, his hands shaking. "Um, hi," Dean echoed. "I'm Dean. Um, nice to meet you." He held out his hand and Molly took it in her own.

"Jesus, Dean. Your hands are freezing!" Dean tried to pull away but she held him firmly, shaking his hand. "Nice to meet you, too. It's, I never thought I'd, you know, didn't ever think my brother would have a boyfriend." She released Dean's hand and he pulled it back, then put it in his lap, his eyes locked there, too.

"Molly!" he exclaimed.

She shrugged. "What? It's the truth."

"Hey, can't you be nice for like, five minutes?" he asked, slipping his hand over Dean's under the table. Dean pulled away and he pulled his hand back.

"Ben, you should know better by now. I'm the meanest person ever, just ask my kids." She snorted a laugh and he couldn't help but smile at her. "But, um, I'll try. Fuck, I just, you know. I tried to think about what to say when I met you, Dean, but I didn't think of anything good, so I'm just gonna wing it."

Dean looked up at her and Ben could feel he was trying hard to fight back a panic attack. "Oh. Yea. Sure."

Before his sister could continue their waitress came over. He and Dean hadn't even opened their menus, so she took a drink order and they looked over their options. The silence at the table was heavy as he only half looked at his menu. Dean barely looked at his before he put it back down on the table.

No one spoke. The waitress came and took their orders, and still no one spoke. Molly looked thoughtful, Dean looked terrified. He cleared his throat.

"So, Molly, this's my boyfriend Dean Kazmarak. Dean, this's my sister Molly."

Molly bit her bottom lip, smiling with the corner of her mouth. "Nice to meet you, Dean. So, how'd you turn my brother gay?"

Dean had been sipping his orange juice and nearly choked, and also nearly spit it all over the table. He caught himself before either happened, his cheeks burning. He loved how Dean couldn't hide his emotions. "Shit, you go straight for the jugular, don'tcha?" He coughed a little and covered it with his hand.

She laughed. Of course she was enjoying this. "Well, you know, I already admitted I'd never considered the day when I'd meet Ben's boyfriend. It was never even a possibility in my mind before this morning. It's gotta be a good story, for him to forgo women."

"Molly!" he hissed. "Shut up!"

Molly laughed. "You can't tell me what to do," she retorted. "So, Dean, how'd you turn my brother?"

Dean swallowed hard, turning his head slightly to look at him. "I, um. Ah, he. Um..."

"He didn't. I mean, I guess he did," Ben explained without explaining. "He was nice to me, I was a dick to him. When I realized I was a dick to him it made me need to apologize, but he was already mad at me and wouldn't let me."

"Oh. That was your first mistake, Dean. Ben's relentless, completely single minded when someone tells him no." Molly sipped again, smiling coyly.

Dean snorted out a laugh, then caught himself. "Yea, um. Found that out."

Molly watched them both, her eyes flicking back and forth as he continued. "Yeah, well, whatever. I had to make it right was all, and the more I followed him-"

"Stalked him," Molly supplemented. Dean nearly choked on his juice again.

"Am I telling this story or not?" he snapped at his sister.

She chuckled, then held her hand out placatingly. "You are, just not very well."

He rolled his eyes. Molly was Molly, no matter the situation. "Eventually I wanted to actually get to know him. Started liking him, wanting to get to know him, then wanting more than just, you know, being friendly."