All Comments on 'Betrothed Ch. 05'

I enjoyed the story and an excellent first story. Looking forward to your next one. Congrats

Loved this story! A very good effort for your first and I look forward to more from you!

That was a brilliant ending! Would be happy for the story to continue even though the immediate peril is gone though! lol

Love it! Its just a great story! Keep up the writing Thanks again

continue with ur work. u really r a good writer!.

That was a wonderful story, I love your writing style. You have a gift for writing romance.

amazing really i love it

although the plot seemed a lil hurried and raw ,i loved the story .

I'm not reading them in the order they were written but now I think I should have. Your writing in the story before this one on your page was more entailed. I enjoyed this story very much. Thank you for sharing with us.

I really enjoyed the story!! although i have to admit 'twas a bit rushed - maybe if you didnt hurry the plot too much it would have better cohesion and would have flowed better, but great story nonetheless!! 2 thumbs up :) xx

1. It's a great concept and plot- love it! But I think it would've worked better if the moments were drawn out a bit longer.

2. When was it set? I thought I was reading a period piece, like from the 1800s or something, but then a few references (sorry, I can't remember them) made me think it was more modern? Maybe just clarify that a bit.

Other than that- great story and continue writing!

Nothing like a good ol' sibling rivalry.

Call me jaded but as good as this story was, it was also a practice in cliches. It might just be because I read a lot, or because I'm a big geek, but I almost expected a dread pirate roberts reference.

Like the story, the feelings of each character. How do u I submit a story. I'm just curious as to know Where?

Can add more depth to characters, more story. 5

I suspected that the brother pushed him overboard from the very beginning. I don't doubt that he also has something to do with the death of Allison's parents. I'm glad that you informed us that this was your first story. It certainly shows. I'm also glad that you finally exceeded the 3000 word count in a single installment.

It's never going to match the work of Alexander Dumas, but it was entertaining. 4/5

I suspected that the brother pushed him overboard from the very beginning. I don't doubt that he also has something to do with the death of Allison's parents. I'm glad that you informed us that this was your first story. It certainly shows. I'm also glad that you finally exceeded the 3000 word count in a single installment.

It's never going to match the work of Alexander Dumas, but it was entertaining. 4/5