Big Dick Johnson's Booty Adventure

John opened his mouth to speak and felt foolish. He had chosen Joey for this exact reason. He thought back to her, 'A time bubble. We're trapped until Eleven turns it off, but we need to deal with the pirates first.'

'Okay. How?' She asked.

John gestured to Eleven and then pointed at the pirates. He made a motion of shrugging his shoulders and holding up his hands in confusion. Eleven held up her holoscreen again, "Momentum is suppressed in the bubble. That means it's also maintained. Any momentum anything had before it activated will still be there after it goes away. Those cannons are going to make a mess of the ship and we can't risk them hitting the time device. If you turn a cannonball around, it will carry it's momentum in that direction. Same thing for the pirates."

That made John laugh loud. Nobody else could hear it, but it had him bellowing from a good healthy place in his belly. Joey cocked her head and sent, 'What is wrong with you?'

'Back in my time, cartoons never seemed to care about physics. This feels just like a cartoon. It seems so silly to just turn a cannonball around while it's frozen and watch it fire back into the gun.' John thought while he tries to control his laughing.

'Oh whatever, come on.' Joey sighed mentally.

John nodded and they walked over to the railing. Ropes were flying through the air with hooks on them or some had already grabbed onto the railing. The two of them went down unhooking them or turning the flying ones around. They also grabbed the pirates who had jumped towards their ship and spun them around one by one.

Eleven leapt over the railing and landed smoothly on the deck of the pirate ship. John glanced down between the boats. The water was frozen just as solid as everything else. It was less than reassuring, but when Joey made the leap over the gap, he sighed and nodded. He couldn't be bested by two of the women in his harem.

With a few steps back, he sprinted forward and kicked smoothly off the railing. Without an ounce of wind around him, he sailed over the gap and landed on the ship.

'So what are we looking for now?' Joey asked.

John looked around and pointed at the door, 'Captains cabin. Got to be full of treasure.'

'I meant what were we supposed to be helping with. That fire between the ships. The cannons she was talking about.' Joey kept a hand on his arm.

He raised an eyebrow, 'We'll get to that. But come on! It's Blackbeard's ship. The legendary tyrant of the seas! I have to see him... And steal from him!'

Joey smiled. She could understand that. They headed towards the rear of the ship and John pulled hard on the door. He imagined it would've squeaked and scraped if time wasn't frozen.

Two steps inside and they both stopped cold. Their eyes were wide and they were both in awe. Though of completely different things.

Joey's eyes were locked on the huge black chest that lay open in the corner. It overflowed with coins and jewels and all manner of kingly riches. She hurried over to it and dug her fingers into the money. Her eyes feasted on the glimmering jewels the size of her palm and gold jewellery that she had only seen in myth and legend. Before John even noticed, she was cramming her small pockets to bursting with it, even going so far to smoosh huge handfuls down her small top.

John, on the other hand, stared at the map table. Behind it, the captain of the ship was mid leap with their chair flying back and a sword half drawn from its scabbard. Jewels and rings wrapped the hands that held the sword and a long heavy coat was flying back around them. Huge breasts were bursting out of a black corset and a massive mane of black ringlets falling down her shoulders and to her waist.

Blackbeard was a gorgeous woman.

John stepped forward and looked closer at her. She appeared to be barely older than him. Her hair cascaded down her front and back. She wore tight black leather pants and a corset that appeared two sizes too small for someone of her enormous bust. Her coat was finely tailored to her strong shoulders and she was laden with gorgeous curves.

He reached out and brushed her flying hair aside exposing more of her face. A strong chin but a cute nose. Bright, coal black eyes and such a fire raged within them. Her skin was fair, if a little weather-beaten, and she had a few scars over her hands and wrists. She wore her nails long and black, her fingers covered in a dozen rings, each more expensive then the last.

'What are you doing?' Joey asked as her hand touched his shoulder.

'Blackbeard, Edward Teach, the legendary pirate. She's a woman. An amazing woman. I have to have her.' John's dick stood erect before him as testament to his desires.

'Alright. Let's grab her. But remember to take away her weapons before Eleven unfreezes everything. I get the feeling we me have a fight on our hands.' Joey chuckled and she walked around Blackbeard. She grabbed her under her arms and John took the hint. He slung his arms around Blackbeard's legs and lifted her up. Her body remained slightly stiff as they carried her to the door and out.

Outside, they ran into Eleven staring at them. She held up her holoscreen, 'Is that Blackbeard? Was he a she?'

John nodded and pointed at his boner. Eleven smiled widely and nodded, 'The gene pool for this harem is growing more diverse by the addition. I will assist in detaining her so you can impregnate her. All the cannons have been dealt with. We can return now.'

He nodded and they started towards the Big John. When it was clear neither of them knew how they were going to carry her back, Eleven took her from them and leapt smoothly across. John and Joey followed without as much grace. They followed Eleven over to one of the outdoor couches where she set down Blackbeard.

John and Joey set about stripping her of everything. Literally. When they were finished, the pirate legend was laying naked on the couch, the same look of determined rage on her face. All of her belongings were stacked on the table and John looked over her body. Her pussy was unshaven but clean and she had more scars all down her well-toned body. She had taken bullets and knives. The evidence of her struggle and climb for power was clear.

'Are we ready?' Eleven asked them. They both nodded and she clicked on her holoscreen. A few more clicks and they felt a rumble around them. The sensation of oppression faded. The first sound to return was the roar of the sea around them.

Then the cannons erupted and the crash of wood was deafening. Pirates who had been jumping towards their ship were suddenly jumping back onto the Queen Anne's Revenge. Hooks and ropes flung back to their deck. The sea surged between them and the Big Johnson suddenly surged forward. The Computer had cranked the throttle and they were cruising smoothly away from the confused and sabotaged pirate ship.

"YARRR! YOU SCALLY DOGS BETTER-!" Blackbeard's voice was deep and commanding. She lurched up from the couch only to have Eleven grab her shoulder and force her back down in a seated position. She jerked in her grip impotently, "What is this sorcery?! What is going on?! I'll gut the lot of you for this!"

"What the hell is going on?!" Kaylee yelled, looking around frantically.

"Quiet! Everyone! Shut it!" John yelled. He walked over to Blackbeard and eyed her busty, fantastic body. Her eyes were on her weapons until he stepped right in front of her.

"I'll not be intimidated by some lanky three-legged man." Blackbeard growled up at him.

"Edward Teach." John said, his hands on his hips. The ship was slowing down now they had a comfortable lead.

"Elvira Teach!" She snapped.

"Not the way history tells it. See, I and this vessel are from far in the future. We sailed back through time itself. We're on a voyage to collect the finest pussy the entire human race has to offer. Imagine my surprise when we are ambushed by the Queen Anne's Revenge and I find Blackbeard to be a gorgeous woman." John said, reaching down to brush her face. She jerked to take a swing at John but Eleven was easily faster. She grabbed her arm before it could even touch John. She then preemptively grabbed her other arm and held them up above her head.

"You expect me to stomach such nonsense?" Elvira yelled, struggling against Eleven, "Whatever you have done, the Revenge will not stop chasing you. You make port. You lose the winds even once and she will be upon you!"

"Actually, no, it won't." Eleven said, "Very simple. Due to the way the time bubble worked, as soon as we got far enough away, time reasserted itself and you reappeared in your cabin as if we never took you."

"You lie!" Elvira snapped.

"Come see." Eleven lifted her up by her arms and carried her thrashing to the side of the boat. Everyone followed and they watched as the Queen Anne's Revenge followed them for another minute before turning off. It turned into the wind and slowly sailed away from them.

Elvira went limp in Eleven's arms, dejected at the truth. She then flared up with rage again. She jerked and thrashed, her voice roaring, "No! It's my crew! The backstabbing fish guts have turned on me and taken my ship! If I get free, I'll kill you and take your ship! Then I'll use it to run them down and kill them all! Treacherous bastards!"

Cleopatra walked over and slapped her full in the face. The Pirate was shocked enough by the action that she went quiet for a moment. Her assailant slapped her again before speaking, "I am Cleopatra, Queen of Egypt and I too was taken from my time! Another one of me is back there, running my kingdom right now just like another one of you is sailing away with your ship! You don't know it yet, but you have been given the most fantastic opportunity of all time! Now shut up and bend over the most magnificent dicking you will ever know!"

Her eyes were wide as Cleopatra yelled at her. John stared her and said, "You really feel that way, Queenie?"

"Yes, I do! Your dick is fantastic and these last few days have been the happiest of my life. Now shut your mouth, you demigod of cock, and fuck this woman. She's clearly distraught and in need of an orgasm!" Cleopatra said and she waved a hand at Elvira.

John shrugged and walked towards Eleven and Elvira. Her eyes dropped to his cock and then back up to his face. She struggled a bit, "No! I'll kill you if you try! No man beds me! I am a legend! I am a terror of the seas! I take men, they don't take me!"

"Ladies, if you would please." John gestured to Elvira.

"Of course." Cleopatra grabbed one of her thighs. Kaylee smiled and grabbed the other. They lifted and splayed her legs wide open as Eleven held her arms behind her back.

"I can't help but wonder if this is why you're called Blackbeard." John chuckled and ran his fingers through her thick black pubes.

Elvira's face reddened and she glowered at him, "A cheeky few of my crew thought it was funny after an orgy one night! The name stuck and I hate it! I tried to shave down there once and cut myself... never again."

John and Kaylee couldn't help but laugh. Kaylee patted her warm thigh and said, "Then you'll be enraged to know that in the future, you're exclusively known as Blackbeard. You are known as a legend of the sea and easily the most famous pirate, but they all think you're a man."

She eyed Kaylee, "Well at least I'm known! Even if it's by the name Blackbeard, I go down in history!"

She gasped as John's finger slid into her and he smiled, "You know, for being a promiscuous Pirate Lord, you've got quite a tight pussy. You seem to be resisting a bit too much if you are this hot."

"What, you expect me to stay dry when such a gigantic dick is going to thrust into me? If I am to be raped, I might as well enjoy it!" Elvira yelled, her eyes boring into him as he worked his fingers into her.

He pulled his fingers back and lifted his cock. She looked down in surprise when his head pressed against her. He pushed and her thick black bush gave way to his throbbing length. She moaned loudly and her chest thrust out, enormous breasts bouncing wildly.

"You have fantastic tits. Look at how big your nipples are." John said, sinking his fingers into her pillowy mounds.

"Shut up and pull on them!" Elvira commanded him loudly, her pussy clenching down along his length as he bottomed out against her womb.

John pinched her nipples and lifted against the great weight of the bosoms. She moaned loudly and he thrust against her pelvis, "At least you are a woman who knows what you want!"

"Stop talking and fuck me already!" She yelled, jerking against the hands holding her thighs. Her legs were strong and they wrenched free only to immediately wrap around his waist. She ground her crotch against his and her walls clenched on him again and again.

John retaliated by pulling down hard on her nipples. She yelped and gave a loud moan. Her pussy grew incredibly wetter in seconds and juices streamed down his dick.

"I'm thinking someone is a masochist." John said, twisting her nipples outward. She moaned deeply and clenched down on him, her hips bumping against his eagerly. He gestured to Eleven and she let go of her. John slung his arms around her shoulders and spun her around to one of the couches. He took her down on it and began to fuck her properly, dick flying in and out of her pussy.

As her moans seemed to peak, he leaned forward and bit down on the side of her neck. He twisted her nipples and sucked her flesh. The rush of sensations made her pussy squeeze tight and an orgasm flooded her body. He kept at it, listening to her frantic cries, until his dick tingled and cum rushed down his length.

He bathed her womb in his cream and sat up. Both of them were breathing hard as his dick rested deep inside her, loosing extra little spurts of cum.

Elvira took a deep breath and looked up at him, "Okay... You win. That was the best I've ever had. Between how hard you battered me with your dick and the pulling and twisting of my breasts... And the biting... Ohhhh." She let out a moan and flopped back, a smile on her lips.

"Still hate me?" John asked, slowly dragging himself from her.

"Nobody could hate you after a fuck like that." Elvira laughed.

John nodded, "Good. You're the newest addition to my collection."

*******

CHAPTER 11 - THE ANOMALIES ERUPT

Blackbeard was in awe of the Big Johnson. She followed John around as they toured it. Her eyes were bigger than the load of cum that boiled in her cunt right now, "I've never seen a vessel so grand. You have things I couldn't even dream of. It sails without wind and it outstrips even my own Revenge. Where are the cannons though? The weaponry? How did you assault us and leave so quickly?"

"We have a device on board that lets us control time itself. With it Eleven, that's our ship's engineer, froze both of our ship's in time. Then we could do whatever we wanted while everything was stuck. No need for weapons." John shrugged.

The ship suddenly lurched to the side and threw John against the wall. Elvira flopped in his arms and her huge, still bare, breasts squished against him.

"John! Get up here! Now!" Kaylee yelled down the stairs.

"Come on! To the bridge." John said, pushing Elvira back on her feet. He ran up the stairs, dick flopping all about, and up the next set. On the bridge, John's eyes widened in shock.

The usual tunnel of water they sailed through when the time device opened a portal had been twisted. A seemingly endless storm of ocean lay before them, the walls of water thrashing all about. A deep crimson tone laid under everything and surges of orange light tore through the space around them.

"What is going on?" John asked.

"I don't know. Eleven just panicked and ran out when all this started." Kaylee said.

"Computer!" John called.

"There has been damage to the Time Device. Eleven is examining it. Patching her through." The Computer said.

"Eleven! What is happening?" John was forced to grab onto a console to keep from falling over. Elvira grabbed the ship's wheel and attempted to steady it, unknowing the computer had control already.

"We missed something John! When I closed the time bubble, a pistol or something shot through the side of the ship! It severed a few of the wires connecting the device. When I activated it and we went through the portal, everything went to hell! The science will take too long to explain! Just get down here and get a weapon!" Eleven's voice sounded immensely distressed.

John and Kaylee turned and ran back down the stairs.

"What does she mean by weapons? What weapons?" Kaylee yelled over the roaring of the storm outside.

"I don't fucking know! I'm curious myself. How much shit did she bring on our ship?" John asked, leaping down the steps two at a time.

They got down to the lower deck and John grabbed the railing as the ship lurched again. Kaylee slung her arms around him and they stumbled down the length of the lower level. Eleven was standing before the Time Device. It looked like it was wrapped in a bubble of shimmering illusion. Red electricity was arcing from it to the floor and ceiling around.

"Eleven! What the hell?" John yelled.

"John! This is not going to be easy. You have to defend the ship while I try to get this repaired. In there is a few pistols that should help you out. The anomolies can't be harmed by normal means because they are partially destabilized from time. The guns will fully destabilize them so they fall out of existence." Eleven said, gesturing to a black box sitting off against the wall.

"I'm sorry, what? What anomolies? What do you mean?" John asked. Kaylee hurried over to the box and opened it up. Sitting inside were four silver pistols, though they had small circular antannae instead of barrels.

"Elvira, Cleopatra, Eve, they're all stable anomolies. Errors in time that can continue to exist without a problem. Unstable anomalies are errors in time that are actively trying to be removed by time itself. The unstable nature of their existence is like a virus so you have to destabilize them before they touch any of you. That's what those guns do!" Eleven said sharply as she violently shoved an arm into the glimmering light around the time device. There was a crackling sound and red lightning arced to her body.

"Are you okay?" Kaylee asked. She lifted two of the pistols in her hands and looked over them.

"Fine. I've got a self-stabilizing core. Like a Faraday Cage for time. Go! Go, make sure the others are safe!" Eleven waved them off quickly.

John took up the other two guns and they rushed back through the ship.

Up the stairs they heard Elvira roar, "Spirits of the damned! Off with ye! Yer not welcome on this ship!"

The two of them rushed up to the bridge to find Elvira slashing through a shimmering orange shape floating through the side door. Her saber did nothing to it and it floated menacingly towards her.

"Get back!" John yelled and he fired the pistol at the anomaly. It didn't crack or bang but instead let out a little fizzle of electricity. A faint blue beam connected the anomaly to the gun and it just seemed to fade away until it was like it never existed.

"What devilry be this?" Elvira yelled.

"Time anomalies apparently. Bad ones. Here, help defend the ship." John tossed her one of the pistols.

"Mighty strange pistol. But it sure seems to work." She nodded.

Behind them, Cleopatra, Eve and Joey joined them on the bridge. Joey was pale and sweat was beading on her forehead.

"Joey, what's wrong?" Kaylee asked urgently.

"The voices! The creatures. Whatever these things are coming aboard the ship. They're so loud. I can't think. My head is in agony." Joey moaned, grabbing the side of her head.

Kaylee held a pistol out to Cleopatra, "Here. It's a weapon. Point it at them and pull the trigger, like this. It'll make them disappear."