All Comments on 'Birthday Pool Party Ch. 04'

Great story. Please continue with more!

Another chapter in this compelling drama, with excellent characters and a plot that moves at a brisk pace.

Great story still. One noticeable goof: Lexi was going to follow Kayla back in her car so she could drive home. Then this > “The drive back to my house is mostly uneventful, with Lexi and I talking about random, inconsequential topics.” So Lexi went back with Kayla in her car. Then this > “Lexi gets dressed and kisses me goodbye as she heads out in her car.” Need more proof reading.

Finally, I think father and the teens ought to relax, become comfortable naked with each other. Casual nudity at home ought to be more common, not ostracized.

"One noticeable goof: Lexi was going to follow Kayla back in her car so she could drive home. Then this > “The drive back to my house is mostly uneventful, with Lexi and I talking about random, inconsequential topics.” So Lexi went back with Kayla in her car. Then this > “Lexi gets dressed and kisses me goodbye as she heads out in her car.” Need more proof reading." Thanks for catching this! Unfortunately there's no way to edit an already published story. I'll edit my copy though. Thank you again for your comments everyone! They inspire me to keep going.

Love the plot and the development. Please deliver more chapters.

Wonderful story. When is Kayla and Lexi going to get together

Cliffhanger! NOOOOOOOO!!! Now you must write the rest of the story. Also wondering why David has such a burr under his saddle about Lexi. I have a couple theories, but all must be revealed.

You can submit an edited file. There are instructions somewhere in the Writer's forum.

5 Stars again! Love the story and the direction.

If I could vote it would be 5 stars again. Unfortunately the site doesn’t register my vote

odd english stumbles

Very well written. The show build up is nice. Makes it much more believable instead of just a spank story.

Steven may have a loving wife. Her name is Lexi!

"When he saw me, Keith tried to get me to go into a bedroom with him. Said he had some good shit to give me. I refused. He did not like that. He said I couldn't tell him KNOW, that I was his cum dump. (Section 1, Paragraph 40) I think you meant to say, 'no.'

Lexi immediately stops struggling and lays her head back on my shoulder. With one hand on her tit and the other up her cunt, I start to finger Lexi slowly. She lets out a soft moan and turns her head so she can lightly kiss along HER cheek while I pleasure her. (Section 2, Paragraph 31) I read that to mean you meant 'my.'