All Comments on 'Bleeding Heart Pt. 01'

There's an old saying, something about you can choose your friends but your families are thrust upon you. Hard luck, Estella, you had the wrong ones thrust on you. This story is promising although you could be a little more careful with editing and proof-reading---I spotted a few typos here and there. But you finished the chapter on a high note with that intriguing cliff-hanger. I'll certainly be reading the next part.

Great start

Great beginning but I have to mention that you have now three stories on the go. The Girl Next Door, Rivals and this one. All great storylines but I hope you will focus one these three first before more come out. I'd like to know what happens next on those stories. Specially Rivals. Great work.

Very promising story with loads of potential. PLEASE take the time to proofread and edit better. The numerous typos (juries instead of jurors, etc) harm the flow of your tale and make it hard to get/stay immersed therein. Also when it comes to dialogue, verbosity is detractive, especially when its meant to be ominous or menacing. Better editing would help your reader stay hooked and immerse themselves (especial sans sex( at least on a sex site)) in your, potentially, quite interesting world.

Very eloquent, n very deep, more please

I like it. A nice setup for the rest of the story.

Interesting opener can not wait to read the full installment. In regards to the characters, can you include physical attributes to illustrate Ms. Bell and Estella, height, body build, skin complexion, eyes, facial features. You have a great thing going with this story!

I just crave more and more of your work. You are so talented. Thank you for sharing your work with us.

With hope that there will be a part 2, and more, soon. I love both vampire and slow burn romance stories with real character development. This story looks very promising, but I've had my heart broken before getting involved in a story only to find the author disappeared without finishing it. Please don't break my heart!