All Comments on 'Body Rentals Pt. 02'

I love these stories. You're doing a really good job. Keep it up!

Not bad. It could have done with less time spent at the dinner table with the mashed potatoes. I think such outrageous behavior would have had the mother in an uproar, pretty much killing any further activity until the mom was satisfied her child wasn't having some kind of breakdown.

Following the dialogue was a bit hard at times because you didn't italicize the protagonist's inner voice to separate it from the rest of the text.

Skipping hours ahead, with all the blank spaces, is a good way to advance the narrative, but I found it a bit jarring because so much was left unsaid. Without the build up, there wasn't any real heat. The character wakes up to find they've been shopping all day, bought a new wardrobe, etc. Okay, but then what's done with that? Next thing we know, she's on the roof.... and more time has passed without anything really happening that was worth reading about. Tons of teases, in other words, and no real pay off.

A very interesting premise, though, and I'm curious to see what happens in the next chapter.

Did she have sex with Stacy during that mouth-to-nipple scene?

These...are amazing. Can't wait for part 3

This series is very hot. I absolutely love it. I can’t wait for a part 3.

If I were to continue the story, I would have Elle get revenge on both Sarah and Ben. A perspective change plus pure rage would be super hot

HOY

Love the change from aware to unaware