Body Swap with Sister's Boyfriend Ch. 02

"What about in your other classes, what if they ask me things?" Troy asked.

"Maybe just agree with everything they say?" Richie suggested. "What about you, what are you doing today?"

"Landscaping up at Mount Coot-tha," said Troy. "It's real nice up there, you know you can see the whole city?"

"Yes, I have been there before," said Richie. "So what work are you doing? Nothing involving chainsaws or anything like that?"

Troy shook his head. "No, just planting plants and spreading mulch."

Richie felt relieved that Troy didn't have a job that involved some technical skill he didn't possess. "That's good," he said.

"And after work, I'm going out with Dakota down to Surfers Paradise with all her friends, so you'll have to go in my place."

"What are you going there for?"

"One of her friend's boyfriends got a promotion at work and we're going to a restaurant in Cavill Avenue." Troy thought. "I think its Olivia's boyfriend, but maybe its Jessica or Madeline or Bella's boyfriend?" Troy then said. "I don't know about you, but have you ever noticed that Dakota's friends are all the same? They don't look the same, but they all act the same and it's hard to tell them apart."

Richie laughed, noting that Troy for once was astute in his observation about Dakota's very pretty but equally shallow friends. "Well, I can't go, I'll have to tell Dakota I'm sick or something."

"She'll get mad," Troy warned. "You don't want to get Dakota mad. She likes things to go her way."

"Yeah, but I think you're missing the point Troy," said the horrified Richie. "If I go out tonight with Dakota, it will be a date. A date with my sister. Think about how sick and inappropriate that is."

Troy laughed. "With Dakota, all you have to do is drive down there with her, sit with her in a restaurant while she talks with her friends, hold her hand and give her a kiss when you pick her up and then drop her home."

Richie's heart was pounding at the terrifying things this evening that Troy thought 'easy'. "Let's go through these one at a time. One, I don't have a driver's license."

"But you have a learner's permit?"

"Yeah, but I've failed my driving test three times."

Troy shrugged. "You should be okay. Just take my license, and then all you have to do is drive down to the Gold Coast and back. Easy."

Given that the trip involved either driving through Brisbane city - a formidable place filled with busy, tight streets and drivers who were impatient at the best of times - or across the Story Bridge, an equally scary place for a novice driver at peak hour, then through Brisbane's busy inner suburbs onto the Pacific Motorway and south through the busy Logan region filled with large trucks to an even busier Gold Coast where there were many trams and buses and streets full of traffic and drivers just as easily provoked as those in Brisbane and Logan - Richie was most ill at ease. But two things made him even more apprehensive.

"I can't hold hands with Dakota and I sure can't kiss her."

"Haven't you ever held hands with Dakota before?"

"Of course not," Richie blustered. He then thought. "Although when we were really little kids, Mum and Dad would make Dakota and I hold hands when we crossed the road."

"Can't you pretend that it's the same?" Troy enquired. "And with the kissing, how about you pretend it was like Dakota was going away for a holiday overseas or something and you were kissing her goodbye at the airport?"

"I still think it will be better if I pretended to be sick tonight."

"But the restaurant where you're going is real nice," said Troy. "And you'll need your energy. Don't forget if we don't change back overnight you'll have to play football tomorrow."

"Football?" Richie nearly choked in panic. "Troy I don't play football, I can't play football, I've never played football, I'm terrible at football, I can't stand football."

Troy thought about this and then said, "I was thinking Richie, that if we swapped bodies then we might be good at things that each other was real good at. Like me, I might be real good with science and maths and computers and shit, and you might be real good at football."

Given how Troy had phrased this and that despite morphing into Richie's body Troy seemed as dim as ever Richie doubted this hypothesis, but Richie was so afraid of the prospect of playing football that he was desperate enough to hope that this might be the case.

"Maybe, perhaps we can try?" suggested Richie.

"I've got a football in the car," said Troy, Richie watching as Troy retrieved the football and he and Richie went to the main body of the park. There were several sporting ovals here, one with rugby posts, one with soccer goals and the third and closest had the four posts at each end of the Australian Rules football ground.

Troy, looking out of place holding the football in Richie's skinny body, directed Richie to stand in place. "Let's try some hand passing."

Troy did a perfect hand-pass in Richie's direction, but despite being in the body of a tall, fit, sporting talented jock, he failed to catch the ball, which slipped through his fingers.

"Now try passing it back," said Troy. Richie's attempts at making a hand-pass went sideways, nowhere near Troy and into the wet grass.

Richie felt himself blushing at his complete ineffectiveness at football. At the bins, the ibises had stopped scavenging the dumpsters for bin juice, and were watching Richie and Troy intently, the loud honking emitted by the birds making it seem to Richie like they were laughing at him.

"Let's see if you can mark the ball," Troy suggested.

Richie didn't actually know what a mark was, but thought it might be catching the ball. Troy took off his thongs and kicked the ball high in Richie's direction. Despite Troy deliberately kicking the ball slowly so Richie would stand a chance of catching it, the ball hit Richie in the head during his ineffective attempt to mark the ball.

The ibises honked their amusement again, and this time some magpies in a nearby eucalyptus joined in.

"Shut up bin chickens," said Troy to the ibises. He again took the football. "Now we're going to try you at kicking." They walked towards the goal posts, and stood directly in front of them.

Despite being barefoot and in the body of a skinny nerd, Troy had no problem in kicking the ball right through the two middle goal posts long and hard. He ran to retrieve the football, and kicked it back to Richie, who once more failed to mark it.

"Now kick it to me, straight through the goals, nice and hard, you can do it," encouraged Troy.

He held up his hands to mark the ball anticipating that Richie could kick it that distance, but this was a waste of time. Richie's woeful attempt to kick the football travelled just two meters off the side of his shoe and splashed into the wet grass.

"Okay then," said Troy, running back.

"You can see I cannot play football tomorrow, Troy," said Richie. "I have to say I'm injured."

"But the Roosters need you in the team, Richie," asserted Troy.

"Didn't you see anything there?" asked the bewildered Richie. "I don't understand football and I cannot play football."

"Relax Richie," said Troy. "Maybe the coach might put you in the forward pocket or something, and maybe you might be able to pick things up as you go along."

Richie attempted humor. "Well, at least I'm not playing professional football at the GABBA and expected to score lots of tries."

This time, it was Troy's turn to be amazed at how somebody could say something so wrong. "Richie, its Australian football, there's no tries, just goals and behinds. Tries are in Rugby League." Troy then thought and said, "Just one thing, if you have to play for the Roosters tomorrow, be careful. We're playing the Crocodiles at their home ground, and the Crocodiles and their supporters can be a bit mean sometimes."

"Mean?" Richie's heart raced. "Troy, what do you mean 'mean'? How mean?"

Troy did not give any answer but said, "Now, you test me."

"Sorry?" Richie was distracted by the horror of potentially playing Australian Rules football for the Roosters in a semi-professional game against a team called the Crocodiles that Troy had described as 'mean'.

"We need to check if I've become more smarter at maths and science and shit since I changed into your body."

Given Troy's last statement and everything that had gone on this bizarre Friday morning, Richie doubted very much that this was the case but he decided to give it a try.

As Troy stood in eager anticipation, Richie thought up a question. "What's thirteen squared?"

Richie watched Troy's face - actually his own face - thinking and thinking and thinking about the answer, before he began counting on his fingers and his face brightened. "Fifty two."

"Fifty two?" Richie was dumbfounded. "How did you work that out?"

Troy looked pretty pleased with himself. "Well a square's got four sides that are the same, so if one side is 13 and you add them up you get 52. Well, is that right?"

"No, the answer is 169," said Richie, to which Troy burst out laughing.

"What's funny?"

"You said 69," guffawed Troy, Richie again having to control his exasperation at Troy acting stupid in his own body. "So, the answer isn't 52 then?"

"No, most definitely not," said Richie.

"Square numbers don't work like what I said do they?" Troy enquired.

"No," Richie shook his head. "Well today we just have to do the best we can do living as each other, and hope we don't switch back at some random time during the day."

"I thought you wanted to swap back?" the puzzled Troy asked.

Richie maintained his patience with difficulty. "Yes, of course I do. But it would be very hard to explain if suddenly we go back into the right bodies and I'm doing landscaping at Mount Coot-tha and you're sitting in my place in a classroom at your old school."

"So what do we need to do now?" Troy asked.

"We need to swap phones for a start," said Richie.

"Why?" Troy again looked confused.

"Because I can't answer your phone and you can't answer my phone can you?"

"Yeah, I guess so," agreed Troy, although he didn't seem all that convinced as they swapped phones. "So today at school do I hang out with your two friends? What are their names?"

"Yes, and they're called Chad and Lachlan," said Richie. "And tonight, they're coming over to my place and we're watching a Game of Thrones marathon."

"Game of Thrones? I've never watched Game of Thrones before." Troy looked most worried.

"It's a great show, trust me you'll love it," Richie assured him.

Troy wasn't all that convinced but shrugged in acceptance. "What else do we need to know?"

"Well, you obviously know most of my family but I don't know yours all that well," said Richie.

"You know Justin," said Troy. "He goes to your school."

"Oh yeah, definitely know Justin," said Richie. Troy's younger brother was aged 16 and like his brother a sporting superstar for the school, although his choice of football code was soccer. Richie wished that Troy also played soccer. While soccer was hard and Richie was sure he couldn't do it, it didn't have the same full contact of Australian Rules football.

However, Richie had little time for Justin - while way more intelligent than Troy - was an absolute smartass, completely egocentric and also fancied himself as a bit of a ladies' man despite his young age. Masquerading as Justin's brother was always going to be a challenge.

"What about your Mum and Dad, and your sister and her husband and their kids?"

"Mum's name is Barbara, and Dad's name is Jim. My sister is called Kaley and she's married to Dwayne. Kaley and Dwayne's daughter is called Neveah and she's four. Their son Axel is three."

Richie thought that with names like Kaley, Dwayne, Neveah and Axel that there was a strong chance they might be bogans, but he said nothing.

"What else do we need to do?" Troy enquired.

Richie pointed in the direction of the lavatories. With the shock events this morning, he had forgotten all about the call of nature and his bladder was close to bursting. "I don't know about you, but I need to pee. We also need to swap clothes, these aren't the right size for us obviously."

"I got to chuck a piss too," said Troy suddenly remembering his own full bladder, he and Richie setting off in the direction of the toilets. The toilets in this park were gender neutral, a row of six cubicles with a screen and sinks in front of them.

Going into the cubicles, both young men pulled down their shorts and undies at the front and stood in front of the cubicles. As he peed, Richie looked in amazement and admiration at Troy's large penis and his big balls amongst a forest of dark brown pubic hair, the young man magnificently well-endowed, boasting genitalia that would make a male rhinoceros feel inadequate. Richie felt at least there was one positive from this, he would for once have a large dick, and it would be hard to go back to his own cock when and if they did change back.

It was a completely different story in the next cubicle for Troy. The young man looked down in horror at Richie's small, thin and limp penis as he urinated, Richie's cock so small it was like the air temperature was two degrees. Richie's most unimpressive penis was just above a scrotum containing two very small balls, and wisps of red pubic hair. Troy felt a lump in his throat and his eyes sting slightly as he lamented the loss of his enormous cock, and hoped this body swap thing would be over sooner rather than later.

Undressing and throwing the clothes and shoes each other wore over the top of the cubicles so they could change, Richie and Troy finished in the lavatories and walked back to Troy's car. "I think it best that we go to your place first, and then we can head over to mine," said Richie.

"But I never go to your place before work," said Troy.

"We'll say that we're giving Dakota a lift," said Richie. "She's going to school early today, netball team meeting or something. And Chad and Lachlan are always at school early, so we can get the Ouija board before there's too many people around."

Approaching the car, Troy said, "I think you'd better drive, Richie. It will give you some practice for tonight."

"Okay," said Richie. Somewhat nervously, he got into the driver's seat, Troy in the passenger side and drove back to Troy's house.

"How did I go?" Richie asked, pulling into the driveway after the slow journey home.

"I um, think you need to practice driving a bit more," said Troy, as he and Richie exited the vehicle and walked towards the house, where Justin was already dressed for school in the sports' uniform, carrying his soccer ball under his arm.

Richie looked at Troy. Here was their first challenge, talking to somebody they both knew. Richie and Troy looked at Justin and he looked back at them.

"Hi Justin!" called Richie, giving Justin a big wave.

"Um, hello Troy," said Justin, the youth sensing straight away that something seemed out of place. His older brother looked the same, but there was just something that didn't ring right.

Justin was even more confused when Troy - although Justin obviously saw him as Richie - climbed out of his older brother's car. "Hi Justin," said Troy, giving Justin a wave.

Troy's unconvincing turn as Richie fueled Justin's sense of puzzlement even more. What was his older brother's hot girlfriend's nerdy twin brother doing here?

"Richie," said Justin uncertainly. He turned to who he assumed was his older brother. "Um Troy, what's going on?"

Richie tried to sound casual. "Oh, I just took the car out and went for a walk in the park when who should I bump into but Richie? Isn't that right, Richie?"

Troy nodded. "Yes, that's right Troy."

Both could see that Justin could sense something was not quite right here, and both Richie and Troy grinned at him in an attempt to reassure him but unfortunately smiled unconvincing, mannequin-like grins in perfect synch and Justin looked even more un-nerved.

"Troy, what's really going on?" Justin wanted to know. "Why are you both acting so weird?"

Again, Richie tried to sound relaxed, as though nothing was wrong. "Oh, we're not weird. There's nothing strange going on at all, right Richie?"

Troy nodded in affirmation. "Yeah, nothing weird here."

"In fact, things couldn't be more normal," Richie continued. "I met Richie in the park, I gave him a lift back here and then I'm going to drive him back to his place and drive him and Dakota to school, then I'm going to work. That's right isn't it Richie?"

"Sure is Troy," said Troy. "In fact, what say you come with us for a ride to school in the car?"

"Yes, we would really like for you to come in the car with us so we can drive you to school, Justin," affirmed Richie.

Again, both young men tried to smile reassuringly but instead grinned their creepy mannequin-like grins at the younger Justin, and the boy clearly had had enough.

"Are you going to offer me some candy to get into your car?" Justin asked sarcastically. "This is fucking weird, you're both up in the park before dawn after it rained all bloody night, and then you come back here acting like a couple of pedophiles. I'll catch the bus to school thanks, at least there's no child molesters on it. Fuck off you sicko weirdos."

Justin went on his way grumbling and muttering about 'pedos' and 'nonces' and Troy and Richie looked at each other.

"That didn't go very well, did it?" Troy asked.

"Whatever gave you that impression?" Richie asked sarcastically as they went inside. "I just hope I can act more convincingly with your parents."

Jim and Barbara Turner were up early in the kitchen having breakfast, Jim already dressed in his high visibility landscaping clothes and Barbara in a skirt and blouse. The landscaping business was very much a family affair and Barbara ran the office and did the accounts, while Jim and the guys supervised in the field.

It felt very strange to Richie to be addressing somebody other than his parents Doug and Jodie Mitchell as Mum and Dad, but he had to do just this when greeting the tall, muscular man with a full black beard who was Jim Turner and the tall woman with light brown hair and a strong Liverpool accent who was Troy's mother Barbara.

"Hi Mum, hi Dad," said Richie.

"Hey Troy-Boy, how's it going?" Jim asked.

"Hiya Troy, how are you today after all that rain last night?" Barbara asked, her voice suggesting that she had been walking along the banks of the River Mersey only yesterday, not having migrated to Australia as a child more than 40 years ago.

"Um, good thanks Mum and Dad," said Richie, hoping his Troy act worked better with them than with Justin.

"Hey it's Richie, isn't it?" Jim Turner asked. "You're Dakota's twin brother?"

Troy nodded. "Yes, that's right Jim." He could not believe he had just called his father Jim.

"I met Richie in the park - he was out for an early morning walk - and I said I'd give him and Dakota a lift to school," said Richie.

Jim and Barbara stared at their son and his girlfriend's brother, both feeling that something didn't seem quite right but unable to place it. It was certainly a first for Troy and Richie hanging out together, but something just didn't ring true. Looking at Richie's footwear, Barbara looked surprised.

"Richie, you walked all that way - in flip flops?" she asked in amazement.

"He um, didn't want to get his shoes wet after it had rained all night," said Richie. "Isn't that right Richie?"

"Yes, that is right Troy, it was raining all night and I wore thongs on my feet when I went for my walk so that I did not get my shoes wet." Troy's robotic response made the parents all the more suspicious.

"Well, I had better go and put my clothes on for work," said Richie.