Book 03: A Match Made - Ch. 02

** August 6^th, 2014

Lissy and Kara

We kissed the girls goodnight when we dropped them off at their apartment.

"This was a fun night and a wonderful idea. It was nice to meet Allie and the other girls."

"Yeah, she picked the perfect night to have one of her better games, " said Rachel, my youngest.

"And isn't Elena a total babe?" That was sassy June, my daughter's honey.

"She's cute enough; that's for sure. And she's damn tall too," said my honey.

I chimed in with, "Hey, the Arlington Million is next Saturday. Let's plan on going."

We had been to the racetrack last year and it turned out to be a hilarious, way fun day. The girls cooed, giggled, and talked over each other as we hurriedly made plans.

"It's not for another ten days, you two. We'll have a chance to talk and make more plans between now and then."

More kisses and hugs from the excitable duo before we got back in the car to head home.

Here's the background on how we happened to see the WNBA Chicago Sky play the Connecticut Sun.

Allie Quigley, a Chicago area native, went to DePaul. She graduated in 2008, so the girls missed the girls by a couple of years. But they had friends who were on subsequent teams, women who knew her and occasionally stayed in touch. Apparently the word got around the alumni that their friend was having a good year.

So Rach and June asked if we wanted to go. Next was picking a team to see and a date they'd be in town. The Sun's coach, Anne Donovan, is a women's basketball legend. Katie Douglas has had a long professional career after starring at Purdue. Chiney Ogwunike is a highly touted rookie from Stanford.

The game was a back and forth affair. Chicago shot the ball poorly early on and were bailed out by accurate, frequent free throw shooting. It was the Sun's turn in the 3rd quarter, as they managed only 10 points. Epiphanny Prince took over and scored 10 of her game high 20 points late in that period.

Allie, whose playing time has increased a great since an injury to 3rd year pro Courtney Vandersloot, shot the ball very well and was second high scorer with 17 points. A 58-51 lead grew to rout proportions when the Sun had another miserable quarter, scoring only 15 points. The final score of 82-66 accurately reflected the miserable night the Sun had.

The crowd was smallish but very enthusiastic. I admit to being more of a college game fan but it was fun to watch in person, something I don't do a lot. We waited near the player's locker room after the game. Eventually they trickled out. Allie came out with Elena Delle Donne, the very tall (6ft 5in) second year star player.

The girls introduced themselves, mentioning their common alumni status. We all introduced ourselves to Elena, who greeting us warmly before excusing herself with a, "Hey, I'll see you tomorrow at practice, Allie. Really great job tonight." Poor Kara did little more than gawk at the two very tall women. The shorter Allie was still 2 inches taller than my 5ft 8in. le sigh

Rachel just embarrassed the crap outta me by saying, "My Mom played in college, Allie." Oh geez!!

A somewhat amused Allie said, "Really?"

"Yeah, it was just DIII (NCAA Division III) and I was hardly a star, but I played quite a bit." With a smile, I added, "I'm old enough to remember Anne Donovan's college career. She was quite the superstar in her day. Great game by the way. You really had your shooting eye tonight."

She shrugged as she said, "Courtney's hurt and my playing time has gone up a lot. It's good to be able to contribute in her absence. And our defense really stepped up big in the second half."

So that was our great WNBA adventure!! It was a real fun night. If you're a women's basketball fan I'd urge you to go to a local game and see some fun basketball played by highly skilled women.

<i>Lissy's Note: There have been lots of changes to the Sky's roster since we went to that game. But the names I mentioned were on the team when I wrote this.</i>

** June 9th, 2014 **

Lissy

This next piece isn't going to be a lot of fun to write. In the weeks that followed Kara completing her rehab we were blissfully happy. I won't lie and pretend we were quite the way we were before the miserable events of New Years Eve and what followed. But it was just so damn good to have her with me. We shared as much time as we felt we could. I didn't want to be a complication in Kara's continued recovery and march to good health.

Eventually, the amount of time that Kara and Britta spent together got on my nerves. It was totally selfish of me and I knew it. It also played on a recurring weakness of mine - Britta's age. You may remember my somewhat persistent fears that centered on the age difference between us. We had been a couple long enough that I shouldn't have had those feelings any more - but Britta brought them all back.

No, that's not right. I'm blaming her when I talk like that. And that's exactly what Amy led me to realize.

"Why do I worry about that nonsense? The other one and I explored it from time to time."

"Talk about that." She's so annoying, making me do all the work!!!

I gathered my thoughts for a minute before I spoke. "Kara would tell me that it was silly, that she loved me. I knew... know... that it's true. I really don't worry about her cheating on me. But for some reason I'm insecure about it... still." I looked at the dark haired woman, perfectly put together in her understated way. Everything about her, from her gorgeous hair, subdued but well chosen clothes, to well applied, subdued makeup, was spectacular and totally appropriate.

My statements were greeted with a slight nod. It was up to me to continue.

"She's not going anywhere, neither am I. We both know it, yet here I am talking about it. It's maddening, frustrating, and I'll be damned if I have a reasonable answer, let alone excuse."

"When has it manifested before?"

I had to think for a bit. In retrospect, I realized there had been instances where I'd felt the slightly unsettling feelings. In a few moments of weakness (stupidity) I'd mentioned them to Kara. Usually it resulted in a brief verbal exchange that did little to soothe my admittedly silly feelings. But they happened!! And as dumb as it sounds I had a hard time picking out a specific date... which probably even further reduced the validity of the feelings. Which I owned up to.

"I'm feeling a little silly, Amy. I can't remember any specific incidents or dates when I felt this way." I squirmed in the chair before saying, "Which leaves me feeling a little silly, because it most likely means it's all just foolishness on my part."

My admission was greeted with a tilt of Amy's head. I wondered if she was this composed and still in her other life - the one that didn't have seemingly normal people whining about made up emotions. As comfortable as I'd grown to feel with Amy, I would only wonder about her life outside this small, well appointed office.

** August 1st, 2014 **

Lissy

"Would you like to meet Kelly?" I jerked my head up. Shade and I were having another lunch get together. We'd made it a point to do so after becoming closer due to the cauldron that had been Kara's drama. Kelly was a woman who held herself out as a Domme. She had played a part in Kara's precipitous slide into darkness. She also had strong emotions about Kara. She intrigued me and I didn't waste any time replying.

"I'd love to, Shade. Kelly played a major role in helping Kara get her job back. Kara basically treats the woman like a deity." That was met with a smirk. "Should the four of us be there or would you prefer to have me meet her alone?"

Shade's reply was direct. "I'd be happy to be a third for lunch if you'd like, but I have no problem brokering a lunch meeting. I don't imagine the two of you would become fast friends. And that's not the reason for the meeting. Actually, Kelly indicated that she was curious about you." I nodded. Our meeting had been all too brief, but I was curious about the woman who held such sway with my heart.

It was out of the way for both of us, given where we worked, but lunch was in that private room in the bar/restaurant that Shade and Destiny were so familiar with. The ever-lovely Connie greeted me warmly, asking about Kara. She seemed very pleased with my response.

"I'm so relieved, Lissy. I've been in touch occasionally with both Shade and Destiny, asking for updates. I didn't want to bother either of you." Sweet, sweet Connie. So very silly.

Reaching into my purse, I found a card, wrote my cell number on it, and handed it to the dark haired beauty.

"Call anytime, sweetie. That's my cell number. I'm grateful for your concern. It was a fun night gone horribly awry, but it seems to have worked out well, thankfully."

A spectacularly dressed Kelly greeted me with a warm smile. We shook hands, with me saying, "Thanks for agreeing to meet me, Kelly. I'm curious to get to know the somewhat mysterious woman who holds such a prominent place in my honey's life."

Dressed in what I suspected to be a Versace design, the subtle red dress hugged feminine curves spectacularly. Graced with an abundant bust, fashionably blonde hair cascaded below her shoulders. Modest three inch heels encased her feet. She oozed class and gave off the unmistakable aura of power that was seldom, if ever, challenged and rarely needed to be given the light of day. I was fascinated and, admittedly, struggled not to be overwhelmed.

"I've been equally curious to meet the woman who so completely captured Kara's seemingly impenetrable heart. So let's have a lovely lunch and get to know each other a bit."

We did. She's every bit as interesting as she is lovely. Something of a prodigy, she made a fortune as a trader in the eerie, to me, bond market. It seems that an unsettled, volatile market is a bond trader's best scenario. I knew nothing about it and it was obvious in what I was certain was a dull, vacant stare and occasional nod.

"How did the two of you meet?" I smiled. She followed that with, "I noticed what appears to be an age difference between the two of you." UGH!

I told her a bit of my background - kids, marriage, death, etc. She laughed heartily when I described the first time we met.

"That's a marvelous story, Lissy, as well as an unusual one. How spectacular that the two of you found each other, let alone that it was that chance meeting that led to your wonderful relationship."

"Yeah well, it's been an odd but totally great ride, with plenty of bumps along the way." Our plates were collected and removed and drinks ordered. It was Friday, after all, and I'd taken the afternoon off.

"How has it gone with your children? Have they been receptive to the seismic shift in the way they viewed their Mother's life and sexual identity?"

"That part of it has been spectacular for the most part. My daughter-in-law was a bit of a problem for a while but that's been smoothed out. I suppose the fact my youngest came out to me as gay was a shock, but that's been wonderful too. Her girlfriend is just a joy to behold."

"That's amazing. You're obviously a remarkable Mom, Lissy." She cocked her head as she asked, "Was it difficult living as straight for all those years?" I shook my head vigorously.

"It sounds cliché, but my husband swept me off my feet. I'd had a few women lovers in college, but Dylan literally took my breath away. " Kelly smiled softly. "Later it got ugly, to the point my tears when he died were mostly for my kids. Kara and I had begun to see each other now and then. The feelings I had for her took a while to come to the surface, but when they did, they came in an unmistakable rush. I knew I'd found my heart."

Kelly stared, as though spellbound, for longer than a beat, then lowered her eyes. I saw what I thought was her struggling with her emotions. It was several moments before she looked at me, smiled, picked up her glass, and said, her voice a tad thick, "That's a lovely and touching tribute to someone I have the oddest feelings for. I wish you and your Kara nothing but happiness, Lissy. You're a remarkable woman. My only request is that I be invited to your wedding."

Startled, I lifted my glass and touched it to hers. How she gathered that we'd talked about that I had no idea.

I nodded after we each took a small sip and said, "We had talked about it before all..." I waved my hand in circles. "The darkness that surrounded Kara." I shook my head. "No, that's not right. It wasn't all Kara. It was my foolish emotional over-reaction that led to Kara's slide." I shook off the memories and said, "I hope you're right, Kelly. My dream scenario is one that includes us living happily ever after. We'll see if that comes to fruition."

So that was my lunch with the woman Kara referred to as Mistress Kelly. I'm not really a devotee of the Lifestyle. As I've come to know, there's a lot of misconception about what it entails. A lot of it comes from the nonsense that's so prevalent in online chat rooms. Be careful of who you trust, who you give information about yourself to. And respect one another - always!!

** June 2, 2014

Lissy

Back with Amy again for our usual Monday visit. It's been a while now and I'm settling in, feeling comfortable with her. And I admit to be extremely relieved. After my time with the other one, I was worried how I'd feel about opening up to someone new. But Amy is solid, I trust her, and I'm feeling like I can be honest with her (giggling I almost said be straight with her. Sheesh!)

"Well, more good news on the Kara front. She's back at work as of today. It feels truly remarkable to me that her boss, Allen Leland, held her job open while she went through rehab. And while she met him after her release, he made it clear there would have to be some time for Kara to get her bearings. Plus, he wanted to monitor her attendance at her N.A. meetings. Which seemed fair. And I've got to give her credit too. She dutifully brought a sign in sheet with her to every meeting and had whoever was leading the meeting sign it."

"You're very proud of her, aren't you?"

"I'm terribly proud and so very happy for my honey. That New Years Eve party scared me half to death. Kara wasn't even someone I knew anymore, and I had missed the signs. I had every good intention when I spent Christmas with Jenna and her family, and I didn't know, at the time, how much damage I was doing to Kara's extremely fragile emotional state."

"And you still blame yourself for that?"

"Well, yes. I mean, I should, shouldn't I?"

"Are you deriving any benefit by holding on to the feeling of guilt for all these months?"

Fuck!! I hate that. Amy asks a completely innocent question, or what I assume is an innocent question, and it completely knocks me for a loop. Wait? Do I assume it's an innocent question, or am I just guessing? Dammit all to hell.

"Sorry, I was thinking. Amy, I've gotta ask you... was that an innocent question on your part, or am I just guessing it's an innocent question?"

She smiled. "I'm guessing you already know the answer, Lissy. Which do you think it is?" Oh god!! Shrinks!

I fidgeted in my chair, not wanting to think about my answer. But I knew it was bubbling in my feverish little brain. Just waiting to me to answer. Sigh

"I guess..." I laughed. "I suppose I'm just guessing."

"Okay, good. Now let's get back to the actual question. What benefit or benefits do you get by holding on to your feelings for all this time?" I should have known she'd come right back to that.

<i>Just answer the woman, you dope. You know we already know.</I>

"<b>You</b> are a most unwelcome addition to this visit. Be gone, you creepazoid.!!" Inside voice!!

I looked up to find Amy smiling. "What?"

"Whatever the topic of the conversation in your head was, it certainly was entertaining to watch it displayed on your face."

I blushed furiously and shrugged. "I can not imagine I'm the only one who talks to herself. And there's this creep, who I suppose is my conscience, who bugs the living crap out of me." Amy's smile grew brighter. "But you're still waiting for me to answer you. And you know, just like I do, that I don't get one fucking bit of anything out of it. In fact, I'm pretty certain it's a remnant of my anger at her for what she did to herself. To us."

And, to my shock, I began to cry. Really major crying jag, too. Tummy wrenching sobs. I couldn't believe I had said what I did, although it obviously had been rattling around somewhere in my subconscious. The crying went on for several minutes, which I somehow found somewhat embarrassing. And no, I don't really know why.

Okay, well there has to be a reason in there, right?

I dried my eyes, blew my nose, tried really hard to compose myself and said, "I've been really angry with her since that party, Amy, and I never told a soul. Course we hadn't met then, and I'm not sure I could have told you early in our relationship. I don't think I told you this either, but she wrote to me every damn day in rehab. She called it journaling, and after she got out, she told me really helped give her a voice to her recovery. I wrote her every so often, and I never once mentioned my anger. Even when she was allowed to go off campus, and we'd go back to my motel room and make love, I never told her how angry I had been... was... with her."

"Can you give voice now to your reasons why?" I had to think for a moment, but I knew the answer.

"I was afraid to tell her. I didn't know how fragile she was or if she was fragile. I thought I had better focus on her getting to a meeting as often as possible." I paused again, this time shaking my head. "They didn't want us seeing each other early on after she got out. I wasn't happy about it, but there was NO way I was going to do anything to put her recovery in ANY kind of jeopardy." Amy nodded. "I guess that stuff's been festering in my subconscious all this time. Must have been the way the words just fell out of my mouth when I finally gave you an answer."

"What are you feeling now that you've let the proverbial cat out of the bag?"

"Surprise, mostly. And relief. A ton of relief. I guess I am pretty happy that I don't have to hold on to that garbage. It sure hasn't done me any damn good in the time she was in rehab or since her release."

"Now that you've let it go and told me, what do you think you should do about it with Kara?" Oh my god! What do I do?

"Kara's release date was April 5th, which was two months ago. I'm not sure, especially with her starting back at her job today, that it's a good idea for me to go home and drop this little bombshell in her lap."

Amy looked at her watch. "I'm afraid that our time is up for today. Why don't you take this question and give it some thought. We can pick it up again next time."

"Okay fine. But do you agree that it's not a good idea to bring this mess to her this soon?"

"Next week, Lissy. I'll look forward to discussing this with you next Monday." We said our goodbyes and I left.

I rode the elevator down to the first floor, exited, and looked for a bench to sit on for a moment. It was late afternoon and I wasn't real keen on going back to work after that session. What I really wanted was a drink, and there was absolutely no freakin' way I was going to do that!!! Coffee didn't appeal to me at all. But ice cream sure as hell did!!!!!!!!

There was a hotel a short walk away; I found their restaurant which, thankfully, was open, and asked to be seated. When my server came with a menu, I talked to her about what I wanted.

"I hope you don't mind, honey, but I just came out of a pretty hellish hour long meeting. And I don't want to drink, so ice cream sounds like the perfect alternative. Calories be damned."