All Comments on 'Boss's Daughter'

No story, just stupid clichees.

You are quite correct...this is not in and of itself, a story. What it is however, is the set-up for what I hope to be a rather lengthy series of stories that will both titilate and torment you until you have no choice but to indulge in some self-abuse just to go on with the rest of your day...or evening. The use of the cliches (notice I do indeed know how to spell) is there to show the underlying tension between the two main characters. I do have a rather large story arc in mind for Kimberly. One where she is used by "Daddy", and others in a party type atmosphere, and one where she is sent to others as a favor, or in repayment of a debt. Hopefully the feedback I get will not be so unrelentingly crass as yours, Sir. However, you are entitled to your opinion of my work, and while I do happen to agree with you, you do not see the cliches for what they are, a starting point for what I plan on being an on-going series of stories.

Got as far as the "36-DD" and quit. Fantasy is OK, but really, let's at least try to make it not quite so trite. Let her sexiness be her best asset, not gigantic boobs.

Made me so very wet...Can I cum for you Daddy??

The young lady I patterned Kimberly after didn't have natural 36DD boobs. I could have "dumbed down" her breast size, but then it wouldn't be what I envision it to be. So, Hamster, I applaud you for your honesty, but I give you an f for your failure to see that some women are indeed large breasted.

I liked it. But considering my friends call me a nympho. & yeah the boobs were a little outrageous but it is possible. Keep up the good work. Can't wait for the next chapter(s) :)

Your responses at criticism so far is even more evidence towards your poor ability to tell a story than this thing above. Yes, some women have big breasts; I myself have 32DD. What is poor form is the mention of bra size as an adjective. It's as though you lack the creativity to describe sexiness so you just picked a large size and cheapened the all-ready shallow and clichéd story.

I advise against both that and using "OMFG" an "OMG" in your writing. Bad bad form. You sound like a 12 year old trying to write a story.

The idea in and of itself isn't bad at all. You just need to learn to take criticism and use it for self betterment. I bet if you rewrite it with you critique in mind it will allow the plot to come through more, and your work will be improved tenfold.