All Comments on 'Castaway Ch. 04'

I can't start a multi-part series knowing that I will probably need to re-read it by the time the next part(s) come out, maybe several times!

Still no answer from the wife why she let that fucker back in the house after shooting her husband and abandoning her there to take the rap. I understand forgiveness, but that only comes after full understanding on why she was so easily swayed by the man that tried to kill the person she supposedly loved. This was after the fact that she found out that he lied about the husbands affairs. I know this isn't a BTB storie but somehow this wife gets off pretty darn easy. Maybe James is just too wimpy to face the truth, he tends to run away from conflict with women in his life. Maybe he is the real problem in these relationships. Too bad, could have been a really good storie.

Barely managed to make it to the end, through extensive use of skimming, but got the gist. Wow. Really bad. If you feel compelled to continue this drivel, maybe you could convince the site to add a new section, called "boring horseshit", and post it there.

Leave it in LW

I like the story and feel that it should continue.

Now that you've established your base story here it seems right to continue. Naturally, James is going to find love somehow and it find it through romance and serendipity. Press on and hopefully surprise us soon.

Thanks for your efforts.

a moving kind of story, but I wish to comment on some rough spots -

I mean, his ex shows up. and then the bad guy just happens to be there too?

He goes back to see new cutie, and she is nekkid with her ex?

And all of the other coincidences... doesn't necessarily make it a bad story, but it takes it more into the realm of fantasy. Which may answer the which catagory question.

Green-something

I wouldn't bother moving it. Nothing that makes any sense here anyway. How long since the last chapter, anyway? Forgot what the previous ones were about and I'm not about to go back and re-read after this.

I think you need to continue this,as to which category I have no idea.

This story is a direct to video discount bin movie.

LOL. I'd say it's working for you. Write another chapter and see if all of the loose ends can be taken care of. Do have to admit, this chapter seemed to take awhile to get posted, Hope the next posting will be quicker. And all of the unfinished threads can be explained or at least put to rest.

You can change sections if you want but Lw is the only one I read. So any stories not in it don't exist to me. Makes little sense to start a story in one section then move parts of them to other sections. No telling how many stories I miss because the author moved the sequals.

More boring drivel, when is it going to go somewhere? As for moving it? leave it or if you HAVE to, to NON-EROTIC, it is not romance.

I liked the story up to this chapter. I thought the talk with Caitlin was unfulfilling and didn't set things to right, leaving out why she let him in that last time, did she know he followed her, her behavior when he was shot etc. Second, the relationship with Tanya felt awkward from the beginning and this just felt like a forced breakup and out of place.

Still looking forward to more about James but i feel like you need to stop and decide where you want this story to go.

Compared to some of the recent stories in LW this one has been OK. However like a previous commentator, I felt the confrontation with his wife was a bit flat, particularly as it didn't cover the final overnight visit from Cyrus to the house. This to me made all her protestations of stupidity/mistakes invalid.

Also like others, the hook up with the film star appeared contrived and unlikely. Future efforts might be better in Romance or Non erotic.

However, thanks for your efforts, and I'll certainly read future postings.

stay in LW and look for a good ending.

I really like the bio-pic, and maybe some of the others should read what's written there. Enuff said, I sure hope this story progress' much longer as I'm partial to the novels section. Keep up the good work, and "hakuna matata".

Almost forgot, lots of the stories cover several venues, heck look at Lady in Red. I think that one covers at least five sections if not more.

A well told story and would like to see more.

regards

Really good story. Leave it in LW because some who would like to keep up with it may miss it in any other genre.

After all the wordy drivel and unnecessary details I at least hoped to get an explanation why the so-called loving wife did not call an ambulance after her lover shot her husband, destroyed all the evidence, left her husband at the hands of a co-worker in order to disappear with the culprit, and later continued her affair with said villain.

If you construct such a scenario with - even for an unscrupulous cheater - unbelievable actions, you should be aware that your readers are waiting for a halfway rational explanation, especially when you set-up a tearful confrontation with the wife. And just to top this all, you let said villain appear just when this confrontation takes place; which probably means: she wanted a replay of the shooting an brought her lover along to let it happen - or didn't she?

I doubt you know yourself what supposedly happened and what drives the actions of this wife.

Keep on going. I'm enjoying the character development. Looking forward to more of the story.

It's a story that just keeps growing on me. I hope you keep it in LW... I would hate to lose track of the story and not get to finish it.

The comments about this being too wordy are rediculas. It's a large story broken into sections. If people don't like to read the long story then don't read stories that are broken into sections!

The story took a real tragic turn in this chapter. You really pulled the rug out from under your hero. All he can do is look forward? At least he has a positive outlook on life. Haha

Hope to finish reading this story.

Still enjoying this character. Tanya was a hell of a letdown though.

Turning into a series I am really growing to enjoy.

Nicely done so far.

I find it twisted and amusing that the hero was actually the victim of an over the top BTB plot by Cyrus. Ironically, if the story were told from Cyrus pov with him murdering James military dirtbag father and accomplice mother only after destroying James marriage, the btb crowd would probably not even consider that got and cheer it on. After all, James doesn't seem to have one bad thought for the man whore even after finding out daddy destroyed Cyrus family with Cyrus whore mother, while James own whore mother simply let it go. Lol, funny stuff.

I'll be interested in seeing his thoughts on his shitty parents next chapter since hell have plenty of time single to ponder it. Or will that even happen? Given that he's being treated as a sex God who bangs all the hotties, I suspect Kim is next on his pump and dump list after she cheats on him and he RAACs with his ex just like his mother did with his homewrecking father.

I have low expectations, due to the goofy island subplot and Cyrus magic photo developing/seduction/teleportation powers in chapter one, but here's hoping you deliver on that dynamic. Cyrus as a victim of James shitty parents was brilliantly creative and inspired. Five stars.

This has been a good story that has kept me looking for the next chapter. Rather than romance, I think that this story could reside in the novels and novellas even reclassifying the first four chapters.

Please try to be a bit more concise.

nm

Keep going for the benefit of all those who are enjoying your story.

Being marooned and being a little lost reminded me if my military flying days when I undertook various survival courses including sea, desert and jungle. Next time may I suggest a little research!

Waiting with anticipation for your next chapter - Good Luck

Ancient Aviator now grounded

It is easier to find in LW, but it is turning into a novella. Maybe you should think of an appropriate title and start a new one with subtitle referring to this one. Basically I did not feel that you explored adequately the time on the island. I did not get a clear idea of a systematic exploration of the island.

I like the story line a lot. How can we keep following it if you change genres?

Personally I really find it annoying for a story to start in one category and move to another. Since there are no cross notifications and you post maybe once a month at best it isn't worth searching all the categories to continue. Also, you will cause anyone in whatever category you choose to back read this story. However, if you are going to continue to hook him up with cheaters then perhaps I do not want to continue reading either. Perhaps this is the conclusion of this particular story and you start anew with a new title and category. Regardless, I have enjoyed this one, although, I did foresee Cyrus' return I'm glad you put him down like the cur he was. I thought Caitlin's return was anticlimactic and a little surprised she wasn't accused of being Cyrus' accomplice considering the timing of their coincidental appearances.

Any choice you're making just let it flow...cannot really wait too long for the next chapters!

You have taking this story into so many far out places, leaving parts truly not even remotely believable. His loving ,loyal wife's betrayal, base on his partner bulshit and photo shop photos, no police called after being shoot, his wife and x partner showing up after his rescue from a plane crash, his partner confession of killing his parents, his partner came to execute him and getting shot dead my his friend. His fantasy affair with a movie star ,who also is double dealing with other lovers. You got to be kidding writing i n all this crap.

Why consider continuing this story to tease readers with the aftermath or fallout of betrayal by Caitlin & Tanya? Would you really expect to readers to accept any semblance of versimilitude for the lead character in allowing himself to trust a woman & fall in love again. Puhleez!!! Move on.

WS

Her eldest (29) seemed to have all the luck. You know the kind, if he fell in a pile of manure he ALWAYS comes out smelling like a rose. All thru high school and college she worried he didnt study enough but at the end of the report period he would stay on HS Honor Roll and in college kept his full academic scholarship and graduated with Engineering Degree and job with Ford as design engineer.

Her other son 5 years younger and barely graduated HS on schedule. Flunked out of at least 3 colleges and is now a 24yo community college student finally completing 1 year of classes but still a freshman. He would always fall into the same pile of manure as big bro but come out smelling like pig cow and horse manure with a generous helping of chicken shit to top it off.

How many times will our hero fall in crap and come out not only smelling like a rose but with a pile of money as well

KEEP UP THE FUN

thoroughly enjoying this story please keep it here. If I can read a story and it piques my interest then I will follow it until the writer finishes it. I am definitely enjoying this read and I do not feel that the writer has finished. So please keep writing

Well, at least he was a (lucky but ineffectual) castaway for a few days!

The Cyrus episode is SO STUPID it hurts. Essentially, Cyrus is a person who has had YEARS to kill the son of a guy who apparently screwed up his life. Cyrus eschews the myriad of opportunities to do that in a safe and sure fashion. He decides to do that the first time during Sweetie's revenge boffing, and fails because of an unlucky shot! So Cyrus goes into hiding in the Atlantic area, but somehow knows that Hubby is in Hawaii and just rescued. So after Sweetie (who had Cyrus as her last lover) gets trough talking to Hubby, Cryus (maybe he just followed Sweetie - who will no longer talk to him) decides to just come out and plug the last of the 'betrayal' family in the open in broad daylight! I cannot understand why ANY part of that advances the story.

More about the 'story' advancing ... it has lost any coherence it might have had. It should have been wrapped up upon arrival in Hawaii. The best revenge is moving on and living well! It is becoming a chapter every Saturday AM of a new adventure of a hapless guy!

The bad guy showing up at the same time as the totally duped wife (or is it ex wife) was a bit too much.

Also, the guys stuck on a desert Island for a couple of weeks, but no thoughts on Tanya or his ex or Kim? Had loads of time to ponder them.

However, I did like the way it ended with Tanya.

Waited so long for this chapter with high hopes. Cait... AGAIN... then Cyrus... again (but at least closure), then Tanya... repeat of Cait. His dad and Cyrus' mom??? Am confused, unless his whole life is cast away (kicked to the curb). Am uncertain if I'll read on to follow James' life, unless it gets better for him.

Continue the Hubby character, if you most. Change to whatever category the next episode merits. Then, give it a different TITLE that reflects what THAT adventure is about! Bring in any old characters (even Cyrus, it was just an ugly scalp graze because of his aviator Kevlar glasses frame!*) you wish to reactivate!

* Hey, it worked for Hubby!!!

There were no answers as to the wife's involvement after she knew her husband hadn't cheated on her. She cleaned up a crime scene for the man that tried to murder her husband and then met (and slept) with that man afterwards. Then he shows up just after she meets with the husband in Hawaii? Like she led him there? She looks much more like a co-conspirator than a victim.

No forgiveness is deserved without some answers. From here, it looks like she led Cyrus back to her husband to kill him. She even apologizes when Cyrus shows up.

Plot line drawn out and not logical.

the storm clouds will appear on the horizon or closer than one may think TK U MLJ LV NV

Keep it in LW to make it easier to follow...

Good story. Please don't change genres part way thru a series. It is relly annoying as other readers and I will not know when you post the next part.

As long as you continue with James,

I don't see why his luck can't change

and thus, switch to romance, instead of LW.

Doesn't he deserve a bit of good luck?

I like this series.

Having one would have made the story more believable and realistic. Once more the story would have made more sense and still achieved continuity. I would say it was doubtful he could even obtain operational liability or flight insurance for inter-island commercial flight operations in Hawaii without having an ELT.

Btw: that acronym means Emergency Locator Transmitter. There are models that activate on impact and/or contact with salt water as well as portable hand held units with built in voice transmitter/receiver.

I have found your series to be intoxicating. When you get into a series like this and it changes location, I find it way to easy to lose the story all together because of the shift to a different genre. I have been working through LW. It is easier to keep track of the original story if it remains as it started. I have been enjoying how you write and look forward to the next segment.

After reading 1-3 I was hoping that the story would continue. It has, and now I hope to read 5. I sort of felt that the current "goddess" would fall apart. It did, but i do fell sorry for Catlin. I have done some stupid things in my life, and fortunately I was forgiven-maybe Catlin ??????

Would someone at Literotica please call/e-mail me. My e-mail etc is rejected etc.

I really would like to be part of your group. Somehow I must have screwed up

keep going

fabulous story

It is in a good place where it is.... as long as he has a happy life and daughter.

Thanks for sharing on Lit.

x

LW is all I read. Please keep it here. I'd like to read more.

Keep it going,great story

LW great story line and I look forward to seeing where you take the characters.

What I got out of it was that he had shitty taste in women. You know, not all women lie, cheat, and act like shit. There are plenty of decent ones. This story is depressing because he kept picking losers. Still, it entertained while I was waiting for him to gain some kind of insight (which never came). As far as more of James? No, I don't think so unless he gets his shit together fast!

If you are going to continue this story, please keep it in Loving Wives. It may be more appropriate in another category, but many readers (like myself) will find it hard to find in an another category. Once a story starts it should stay in the same genre.

So much for the connection they both felt.

I look forward to the next chapter. I seldom vote before a story is over, but I'm really enjoying this one. Thanks

glad he got some closure on with his ex wife and made peace with all that was happening in his life. shocker though to find out that the man he had as a partner really was the one that killed his parents and was only after revenge on him. at least in the end he found out what it is like to be around someone important and how they have different valves than the average person. wish u would keep the story in LW as it's hard to follow a story if u don't know where to look for it. love to keep up with this one. great writing

If you are going to continue this story, please keep it in Loving Wives.

Whether it's in LW or Romance, I will continue reading this saga. 5 stars.

Changing category...I have always said that one story must be kept in the category it begins, so the readers can follow a story that they have begun reading...This is even more true if the story is already in its part 4...So I advise you to keep the story in LW...About this part: He didn't chaged his principles, when he found the new woman also lying to him, he let her go...But it didn't ended the story...so let's see what the future brings...3* for now

I would really like to get an answer to these two questions...

1. Why did the wife let the scumbag back in the house after he tried to murder the man she loved.

2. Did she lead the scumbag to Hawaii,,,,seems like an odd coincidence both of them showing up at the same time?

If you can keep it in loving wives one of my favourites keep it up

A very nice story. Would like to read more better if kept in LW category but shall read in the romance one too.

I love the story.

Was rooting for him with the actress. She knew of his history, and she was doing that to him?

Hard to deny having sex when you are caught naked with a group party and with the ex? with her.

To bad.

Seems like your character and me have the same opinion. Just too inane, predictable, obnoxiously wordy, and . . . boring. So the wife got a shot of Martian slut ray, then Cyrus got a shot of 9mm. tranquilizer, then Tanya got a shot of ex-boyfriend cock. Maybe you should take a shot at learning how to write?

About time this guy catches a break! Good story. 5*

Enjoyed the read. Look forward to the further adventures. Would be cool if he caught a real break.. Tanya giving up Hollywood totally and coming to him. I read LW exclusively and would look forward to you continuing here, but will go where you lead.

This chapter felt rushed. To put it bluntly, calling this series Castaway was a poor choice. You resolved the entire lost on an island part in 1.25 pages and he was only realistically 'lost' for 4-5 days. It is the literary equivalent of watching Lawrence of Arabia, but most of the movie focuses on the events before and after his adventures.

The short bit focusing on his 'castaway' status was annoying. He had a poorly equipped sea plane in regards to the standard safety loadout. You could explain this by saying that the plane was damaged and the remainder was all that was potable, but it was ignored. You have him dying of thirst by day 5 while he has a pond on the island, a fire, and a plane which I am sure he could have salvaged something from to make a container. Barring sensible thought, he had containers that were filled previously with water. You can boil water in a plastic bottle over a fire, he should have known that if he took scout training. His response on the fifth day was basically "woe is me, how am I going to die quick so I don't have to feel no pain?"

After his brief sojourn as a 'castaway', he returns to the island to find his wife and, in a stroke of amazing 'coincidence', his would be killer. You already left a bit of a question about his wife's motivations in the previous chapters, specifically dropping him off in a mostly (apparent) horribly wounded state and not calling the police. Not to mention her ludicrous jump to believe he had an affair and the lack of sufficient evidence, prior to her immediate 'burn all the thingz' revenge. Now she shows up with his enemy in a position that he has no witnesses or defense in, but she walks after the incident. The police obviously don't even bother to question her.

He goes back to his whirlwind romance, but she turns out to be a cheater as well. At this point, I have to wonder if your use of castaway was not meant to reference his 'tom hanks' brief situation, but that the people in his life keep casting him away.

Look, I get that this is a site that is free and the only reward you get is from the comments of your readers. I am willing to overlook a ton of stuff if the story has meat to it. You can misspell every tenth word or have shitty grammar and I generally will say "Good story, maybe see if you can get an editor." I'll even read follow up stories if you don't improve. But I despise massive plot holes, and as I have said previously on your other chapters, this tale has GAPING holes and inconsistencies. I seriously think you could do better if you tried, maybe read through a second or third time and think to yourself "what will the reader think about this portion?"

I wish you luck if you decide to continue the series. I would suggest if you have no plan for his reconciliation to the wife at some point in the follow up, to probably consider romance or some other category. 2 stars.

I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt here because I'm not sure if you bothered to do any research. If you did, you might know that few pilots take flight without some critical emergency supplies on board. Your idiot didn't even have a knife or the most basic iodine tablets.

And how long was he on the island? I've actually gone five days without food (long story) and while it's not an enjoyable experience you certainly are nowhere near thinking about suicide.

Aside from the improbability of the whole island scene, the rest is, at best, the stuff of soaps.

One star because I'm feeling generous.

Are you writing a short story, which is a snapshot in time, and has a beginning and an end? Or are you simply going for the guy's life story, like a novel? Birth to death? The guy knocks on the door and is ushered in with a friend to see the hostess naked? With a naked man? Why can't I have friends like that? This chapter ended with everything tied up. Is he going to wander aimlessly now? The issues that began this story are solved.

But I am enjoying it.

You mentioned 5 births and 2 heads in a 37' boat.

That is pretty unbelievably tight.

All "Islands" pilots do not fly over oceans without basic survival gear. In fact you can buy ocean survival kits about the size of a suitcase, that contain everything you need for 14 days, including extra radio beacon w/SOS strobe, and a nifty raft/tent combo.

came to mind until the ending. I meant to press on 4 but the bloody thing only scored 3

As always, thank you everyone for your comments. Overwhelmingly, it seems, people agree that once a series starts, it should not change category. Thanks for the responses. As for several other comments, you all might be reading my mind and notes, on where this has been going, and will be. The last comment about Notting Hill is funny, as I love that movie. Tanya wasn't inspired by Julia Roberts' character, but the similarities are hard to ignore. I have chapter 5 about half done, and am doing my best to not make you all wait as long. I get it, waiting sucks. The fifth is likely to be the last of the "Castaway" line, but I seriously doubt I am done with James Holmes and his friends.

Thank you very much!

RNebular

I'd like to have the chapter 5 coming very soon.

Finally I don't care for some possibly logical mistakes, related to the true aviation business. It entertains me very well. Thank You for writing and keep on doing so and better.

This is a good adventure, LW story. As you neared the end describing his coupling with Tanya, it didn't fit too well with a good story. Thankfully the very end of Ch. 4 does end in a more logical fashion. The ending with Caitlin is still not done yet, but this is not a suggestion of reconciliation. That, or other alternatives, is the author's call.

Carry on!

Tiny Tim

I do agree on the venue change to "Romantic" as it is no longer a story involving his ex-wife...at least as you are writing it now. You have even set the stage with his employee and her daughter if it goes there. Like what you have done with the character and his insecurities after what happened to his marriage. I can see a lot more story here...even a place for Tanya still. And lets not forget Howard and all his connections...oh the possibilities...LOL!!! Keep 'em coming!!!!

There is an ambiguity about Sweetie's and Cyrus's presence on the island at that time. Hops from Honolulu to the less populated islands are infrequent (like once a day in some cases.) Did they actually come (hehe) together, or did Sweetie know he was there, or was Cyrus trailing her to get to her? Together is inconceivable (but then, a lot of things in this tale are!) If she saw Cyrus on the same plane, surely she would have asked him why he was there! If he was using her to track down Hubby, that would be a VERY low-probabilty activity. Sweetie got a telephone call from their daughter. She promptly makes a reservation for an ASAP flight to Honolulu, connecting to a hop! Soon afterwards (a day or two) she goes to the airport. If Cyrus is living with her (???) no problem him knowing what she is doing. If he is staked out watching the house for the past 2-3 months, all he sees is her going to the airport. He follows her there, and no one is going to tell him her destination. Without a ticket, he can't get thru security to follow her to the gate. Even if he could, getting a ticket on that plane is highly unlikely. Unless he an, though, he wouldn't know is she stays in Oahu, or goes to another island.

Sorry, but I gotta repeat my prior comment. Just plain STUPID. Unless you grant Cyrus mystic abilities. Even then, all he'd have to do is remotely suggest Hubby off HIMSELF. It just does NOT work!

BTW ... I think a series that has a coherent theme with a beginning and an end, no matter how convoluted, should stay in the category in which the theme best fits! That does not apply here!

My comment on this story seems to have disappeared.

1) This story lacked tension and drama. Part of this is the cold blooded way that protagonist reacted to pretty much everything. He gets shot? No worries. He meets a billionaire. No big deal. He crashes into an island? "Maybe I will die...yawn!" His girlfriend is banging some other guy? "Hey let's go get some chicken wings."

CYRUS cared about something but he was not in conflict with the Big Pig Protagonist singing that stupid Disney song. It takes two to have drama. And frankly, our man did not care enough to find out any of this crap.

2) Good and bad events did not build on one another nor did the protagonist have anything to do with most of the (off stage) conflicts in the story. He was very blasé and low energy unless it came to drinking at the Tiki Hut.

You need two forces smacking against one another. This lacked that because Cyrus was off stage and unknown for large portions of the story and was never billed as a RECURRING villain.

This was also overly long. I had to push to finish this chapter and since everything has been wrapped up in a bow, I see no CONTINUATION of a story. I just see a new story which has nothing to do with THIS arc.

. . . was terrible. Nuff said.

Thanks for the comment. Trust me, I had nothing to do with your previous mystery comment. You are right, about his character. To steal a line from one of my favorite movies (paraphrasing) "You should be the leading role in your own life, but here I sit, playing the best friend". The Castaway theme wasn't just for the island, but for his life as the story plays out. He will try to reign in control and retain his status as the leading man in his own life, but that isn't something that happens overnight.

Anyhow, thanks for the excellent feedback!

RNebular

I enjoyed the first 3 parts, and was looking forward to the conclusion. It seems like you were just in a hurry and wanted to get it over with. Cyrus showing up on the dock exactly when Caitlin was there, giving his explanation for his crimes being a revenge thing then getting shot was silly. And the end, with him finding out his Hollywood girlfriend was a cheater, made no sense. It's like you just stopped the story and wrote "THE END" and walked way.

I just sent part 5 to my editor. This next chapter is basically the conclusion, and (I hope) wraps up all of the important loose ends. Any new series that I pen, will probably all be done up front, and then submitted. I have gotten numerous comments that people would prefer that, versus waiting in between chapters.

I hear you.

Thanks for all the support and constructive comments, and I look forward to reading more good work in this category with you folks.

RNebular

How in the world did Cyrus get out of jail? Seems he would be in a super-max.

...with your story. I'm probably in the minority, but I'm one of those that would vote for staying within the original category. Why? Because it was the foundational theme of the piece through the divorce, which is still affecting his life...and the story....and because it will be much, much harder to find the next chapter elsewhere. Besides, there's another branch of this story you could delve into, just enough to set the stage for another. You have his operations gal and her daughter with a back story that begs for telling, as well as his mechanic, with the scars of his earlier life on his body, his heart and his psyche.

I like consistency in the presentation of a piece as much as I may like the piece itself. Like a book. I tend to buy any one of three or four genres in book form. I am old school, in that I like the completeness and cohesiveness of an entire story in one container.

Too bad about the actress. All indicators, initially, were that she was the real home-town girl type...at least her friend seemed to think so....then she turned out to be just another self indulgent, highly promiscuous, Hollywood princess. Drunk on her popularity and apparently believing she had risen above the strictures and rules of normal society, relationships to her were like Dixie cups. Our hero definitely did the right thing walking away as soon as he discovered that he was nothing special to her...just another toy....and that she had lost the ability to have a healthy, exclusive, loving relationship with a man. Her loss.

In any event, I for one am looking forward to the next chapter in this tale. I want to see him finally get his keel fully under him and find a course in his life's journey that fulfills him. Marry again? Well....he's probably pretty shell-shocked by women, about now....not likely to trust them for some time to come. But eventually, he needs love and companionship to be truly happy.

Thank you.

I'm looking forward to the continuing saga of James. You have a great knack of both plot and chsracter development.

This story seems to have moved past the LW stage in his life, and into the realm of romantic relationships.

This was an improvement. I especially liked the way things developed with the movie star. Nice touch. The start of this showed much improvement in communicating details, but then quickly became a bit tedious again. Here are two examples:

1: "I couldn't make out much else, due to no moon and the complete darkness that comes from having no lights at all around." - you did a great job of explaining how disoriented he was in the darkness, but then added the bit about the moon and lights. That was unnecessary commentary. Use details to lead the reader to make their own conclusions and paint their own visual. Don't simply tell them.

2: "I limped to one of the rear compartments, and got out some of the emergency supplies, along with the rope stored there, and then shut the compartment. I put the emergency kit on a seat in the front, then walked away from the plane to find something to tie on to." - the shutting of the compartment door and then putting the kit on the seat are two details that needed to be eliminated.

Too many insignificant details drag a story down and make it boring. Unless you were going for that effect. You did have the character actually say "Good god, this was boring." It's fine for the character to feel that way, but not the reader.

You have some potential my friend but really this story is "all over the place".

They tried to kill him twice. His wife cheated on him for a long time.

He find himself with a movie star. He survived a plain crash with no damage.

Three stars once again.

"I had the flare ready, but never actually saw the plane. It must have been on the other side of the island" - Assuming it's a search plane, why wouldn't it check both sides of the island?

"but I do still love you." - Bullshit! You don't do what she did to someone you love!

Her story still makes no sense! Okay, she was lonely and believed the snake's lies, but doesn't confront her husband; THEN she doesn't even recognize HERSELF in the pictures of her husband "cheating" and decides to run his nose in her cheating, and doesn't call the cops when he's shot and covers up for her lover's attempt to murder her husband. Let's chalk ALL that up to some sort of temporary insanity. But THEN she continues to fuck the snake! If she had ANY love for her ex AT ALL, when Cyrus showed up she would have cut his balls and/or cock off! And I'm not buying that "several" months thing - the pictures were from a year before the split; how did Cyrus know they would be out there if somebody (her) didn't tell him? So there must have been SOME involvement for a YEAR before the "revenge" fuck!

And how in the hell did Cyrus show up there anyway? Did she tell him where she was going?

Nit Picks: "She literally had a pool, a hot tub, a little cabana that was likely a wet bar, and what looked like a pool house or guest house of some kind." - "literally"? Is there any way to "figuratively" have those things? And a yard that is "literally" big enough for a golf course? Color me skeptical.

"why was he only in boxers?" - He WASN'T "only in boxers"! He was naked, it was Skip Cruz who was in boxers!

"I really like you!" - Maybe I'm mis-remembering, but I thought she loved him?

I did not intend my remarks on ELTs to be negative as the quality of the story. Millions of people fly every day without knowing the mechanics and rules of modern air travel. I did not think there was one person who knew what safety equipment is found on aircraft outside of pilots or others working in the areas of flight operations. Heck, even the news folks have no idea what they are talking about when covering aircraft mishaps. As far as I am concerned this is a good story and I'm looking forward to reading part five. I gave the author 5* the first time and gave him another 5* just now.

Fun to read, even with all the odds twists and turns. Finding out his wife had been having an affair all along was kind of mundane and disappointing. Obviously he didn't know her at all, and her apologies were as usual inadequate- we never really know why she was so shallow in the end. The actress interlude was a happy interlude. All the 40-something divorced guys would like to think they could rock a young hottie's world, I guess. For a guy who has been dealt disappointment after disappointment, he sure is calm and accepting now. Must be those fruity drinks.

Lots of little side trips in James' life.

I get irritated with the "I love you more than anything" or "I never meant to hurt you" or "it didn't mean anything" excuses. It's all a bunch of lies. If you can't do something in front of you spouse/significant other then you probably shouldn't be doing it.

I foresee a reconciliation coming with Caitlin or a relationship with his office manager. I certainly hope reconciliation doesn't happen due to her continued lying, disrespect, and selfish behavior. She doesn't love James and her actions and behavior prove it.

As far as Tanya goes, I guess there was no commitment yet, so whatever. Pretty dumb excuse that it didn't mean anything. Lies and more lies. Good riddance.

There was one Lit cliche that was completely forgotten until this wacky author finally pulled it out of the box. Damn, it's dangerous being the parents of a Lit story protagonist. They're droppin' like flies, people!

Pardon the devolution, but Hubby was starting to sound rather faggy when he was conmiserating with his ex-cunt. Given all of the gayness abounding in this story, one supposes that the author can only conceal so much.

Round and round the story goes.

dumb shit.

I hate Hollywood!!! Such fake hypocrites!!

James has such a loser attitude. Picks the wrong women, wrong business partner, gets himself shot, wrecks his plane... Jeez! Why subject the guy to another story.

a woman jumps into bed immediately with you, what do you expect her to turn out to be?