Caught at the Divorce Hotel

"Will we learn anything from the blood test, Lisa? Is Jake my son?"

She started crying harder than ever with her head between her knees. She was rocking back and forth as she cried like she had never cried before. Turns out my blood was the same as Jake's and we ended up donating several pints of blood.

A few minutes after we gave blood, I asked everyone to give Lisa and me a few minutes alone. After they gave us our privacy, I took a good look at Lisa who was trying to avoid eye contact. I noticed how disheveled her clothes were, and I realized she must have rushed out of the hotel room to get there.

"Lisa, you look terrible. Your nylons are missing, your makeup is a mess, and you haven't even brushed your hair. You smell of sex, and I'm guessing you're sitting here with your family, while your pussy is full of your boyfriend's spunk. You couldn't be more disrespectful if you tried."

That comment caused her head to snap upright and speak for the first time since she arrived.

"He's not my boyfriend. Please don't say that. There's no one else, I only love you."

"Lisa's if he's not your boyfriend, then do you just sleep with random guys, are you really just a slut? Please show me some respect, I'm not an idiot. You've been turning me down for sex for the last two months. Hell, even last night you feigned a headache and turned me down again. Why Lisa? Did you want to be fresh and ready for your boyfriend today? Look, this isn't the time and place to discuss this. Just go home, clean up, and come back looking presentable. Our children and your parents don't need to see you like this. I don't want to discuss your betrayal, or our divorce until after Jake gets better."

"Divorce? No, Joel, you can't divorce me, I love you. Please don't say that."

"Lisa, we'll discuss our future, but not now. I can't waste my energy on you right now, I have my son to worry about. I need to focus on Jake, not what you've done to our family. Just go home and get cleaned up. If you can't drive I'll have your dad take you, or I'll call an Uber, but you need to leave now. Jake won't be out of surgery for a while and you should be here when he wakes up. The last thing he needs is to see you looking like this."

She stood up, tears still falling. "I'm so sorry, I'll leave."

Two hours later Lisa was back, with no makeup, hair in a ponytail, and wearing jeans and a sweater. She had stopped crying but looked terrible from the crying and humiliation. She was now sitting with her mom and dad, as our girls stayed by my side. I told my girls we had to stop any resentment towards their mother, and that we needed to focus on Jake. I explained that there would be time to have conversations about this later, but right now we needed to be a family.

So, for the next two days, we took turns holding a vigil for Jake who remained in a medically induced coma. Finally, on the third day, there was positive news from the doctors, and Jake was going to be OK. He would need to stay in the hospital for a while, but he should be able to go home in about a week.

We all cried and held each other when we got the good news. Lisa tried to warm up to me, but I wanted no part of that, and gently pushed her away as I held my girls. Lisa's world had imploded, and she had no idea how to reinsert herself into the family and save her marriage.

Since the family were taking turns staying at the hospital, there were no sleeping arrangements for Lisa and I. But on the third day, I decided to let Lisa know how I wanted to move forward back home.

"Lisa, now that Jake's going to recover, I'll be sleeping at home again. Obviously, I don't want you in my bed. And since you're the one taking on new lovers, I think it's only fair you move your things into the guest room."

"Please Joel, not that. Please don't kick me out, you know I love you."

"For right now, until Jake fully recovers, there is no us. You are the mother of our children, and we'll need you to help with Jake's recovery. But until I decide what my future holds, you and I are no longer a couple. Yes, we're legally still married for now, but I don't think of you as my wife any longer."

The tears flowed again, but she understood and moved into the guest room. I talked to the girls and they understood. We all agreed not to let Jake know what was happening until he was healing and getting better.

I turned the living room into Jake's recovery room, rented a hospital bed, and wheelchair, hired a daytime nurse, and prepared for his return home. With Jake in the living room and not mobile, he wouldn't know about our sleeping arrangements as long as the girls kept our secret. His recovery was our priority.

Insurance and Lawsuit

The driver of the truck turned out to be an ex-con who was mistakenly hired by Scientific Laboratories, a large publicly traded pharmaceutical company. Somehow, he passed their screening and background check, which would end up being an expensive mistake.

During the investigation, the police discovered that the driver had been vaping, was under the influence, and texting on his phone at the exact moment of the incident.

The lawsuit did get national coverage due to the current high crime rate and the current anger with the pharmaceutical companies. Our attorneys knew we had a slam dunk case and sued for an extremely large dollar figure. After the jury heard the entire story, the company knew they were in trouble, and offered us a hefty eight-figure settlement number rather than risk an even higher punitive damage payout by the jury. This did little to assuage our anger and grief, but it allowed for the best medical treatments and physical therapy for Jake. It was also enough to secure his future, pay for the kids' college, and allow me to take a hiatus from my job and be there for Jake during the eighteen-month time it would take for him to fully recover.

Lisa's thoughts

When mom slapped me in the face my world came back into focus. I looked around the room and saw all the people I let down and hurt. The feelings of remorse, guilt, pain, and failure flooded my body, and all I wanted to do was run and hide. I begged for some forgiveness but was only treated as a miscreant. The pain increased when I heard Jasmine tell me she hated me and wanted me to die. All I could do was cry and feel sorry for myself. The thought that all of this was my fault overwhelmed me with a feeling of dread and sadness.

I tried to explain that I wasn't having an affair and it was a mistake, but my dad stopped my delusion when he told me to stop lying, and that we wouldn't be here if I had just remembered to pick up my son instead of spreading my legs for another man. I realized that it was all my fault and if Jake didn't pull through, I would end my life because I would not be able to handle what I had done.

When we needed to give blood the hatred I felt in that room was overwhelming when Joel asked if Jake was really his son. How could he think that he wasn't his son? Then I realized what I had done and what they were thinking, and once again I wanted to run out of the room and hide.

After a long time, I was finally able to stop crying. That's when Joel asked everyone to give us a few minutes alone. I suddenly got nervous and didn't want to face him like this. When he pointed out how I looked and that my stockings were missing, I realized I had left the hotel without thinking about how I was dressed, because all I cared about was seeing Jake.

Then I cringed and started crying when he said I smelled of sex and asked if my boyfriend's spunk was still inside me. That's when I knew how bad I screwed up. Sitting there looking freshly fucked, and smelling of sex, made me understand the gravity of this situation. He was right, I needed to get home, clean up, and be there for Jake when he woke up. Then I felt angry when he called Donnie my boyfriend and I had to correct him. But when Joel explained that Donnie was either my boyfriend, or I was just a slut, my argument became irrelevant.

Divorce? Why would he say that? Oh God, no. Not that. This was never supposed to happen. I can't lose Joel, I love him. Donnie was just a distraction. I know it was wrong, but there's no love. He had to understand that it was a mistake and I'll never do it again. He loves me, I know it. I have to find a way to make this right, but how?

Recovery

My wife and the girls were all involved with the recovery. After Jake's release from the hospital, we brought him home and introduced him to his new room, complete with a Hospital Bed, the remote to the new 65-inch TV along with his video games. We wanted him to feel as comfortable as possible during his rehabilitation. We had several day nurses helping us during this time, which turned out to be a blessing. Mary and Roger came over daily to help, and along with our daughters we all got used to the new normal.

Roger and I spent a great deal of time talking about things and my plans. Her parents wanted the best for the family and suggested counseling to try to stay together. Several times I told them I wasn't ready and wanted to continue to focus on helping Jake through his difficult time.

Lisa and I were only speaking when we were together with Jake. From hearing the girls talking that his mom made some type of mistake, and realized that there was a big problem. Jake was always the sensitive one in the family, and one day when we were alone, he asked me what was going on and for me to forgive her. He reminded me that Mom loves me and he can tell she's been hurting.

I had to wipe a small tear away and tell him that our issues weren't his concern, and to concentrate on getting better. That's the moment I realized that I needed to face the situation and make some decisions. I told Lisa we were going to dinner on Friday night to have a talk. Mary and Roger sat with the kids that Friday night.

We went to our favorite Italian restaurant, and after several drinks I decided it was time for the talk, and told the waiter to give us some time before we ordered. This was the first time since that fateful day I spoke directly to Lisa. Up until that night, I had only answered questions or followed along in a conversation. So, for the first time since the accident, I spoke directly to Lisa about our future together.

"I know it's been hard for you, and it's not fair that you're sleeping in the guest room. Since the accident I haven't had time to think about our future, but over the last few days I think I have a solution to end all the stress the family is feeling about our situation.

I'll look for an apartment near the house, and you can move back into the master bedroom again. Once Jake is up on his feet, I'll start the divorce process. I want to wait until he's better before he knows the entire reason for our separation."

I saw a tear fall from her eye as I downed my third drink. I felt like the boy who lost his best friend, as I held back a tear for my loss. All the years of love I had for this woman were ruined by one act of selfishness, and now we were both paying for her actions.

"Joel, is there any way you can forgive me and let me back into your life?"

"Lisa, I love you and probably always will. Besides Jake's accident, losing you has been the hardest thing that's ever happened to me. I just don't see a way back. Your selfish act of putting your boyfriend before our family and betraying my love is something I'm not sure I`ll ever get over. Our son Jake almost died because you needed to be with Donnie. Think about that and put yourself in my position."

"Please don't say his name. I've hated myself ever since that day. I don't blame you for hating me either. What I did was unforgivable. What's worse is I betrayed the only man I've ever loved, for what? One stupid fling with a man I never even wanted in my life? I know I fucked up, and I don't deserve anything from you or the girls, but is there anything I can do?"

"Lisa, I don't think so. As far as I know, you haven't done anything to resolve the situation, and that just shows me you really don't care. Once we divorce, you can go back to your boyfriend or anyone else. With your new body and looks I'm sure you can have any man you like," I said sarcastically.

"OK, I deserve that, but since the accident, all I've done is try to be with Jake. I tried not to think about what I did to you. Let me make things right and give me another chance, please."

"Do what you want, Lisa. I'm not making any promises here. I'll wait a few weeks before I start looking for an apartment. But to be honest, whenever I think about the months before the accident, how you treated me, the lack of sex, and your narcissism, I have to believe that you really don't care. I was there for you during your sickness and worshiped the ground you walked on. You took all that love and tossed it away, like a diaper full of crap. You've given what was once mine to another man, allowed him to use you and God knows what you did with him. I don't know how I can get past that, Lisa. Tell me, how long were you dating Donnie before that day?"

"I was never with him before. It was only that one time, I swear. And there was never anyone else."

"That wasn't my question. I asked how long you were dating Donnie? Obviously, you two were making plans before that day. I'm going to guess you've been having lunches, maybe after-hours drinks, special text messages, or an email or two. If I check your phone text messages or emails, will I find a relationship? You see Lisa, giving yourself to another man is more than sex. The moment you started thinking of him, giving him your attention and intimacy, it became an affair. So, I'll ask one more time, and please be honest. Your lies or deception will not help our future."

"I see your point, and I can see how bad I messed things up. I guess it started about three months before the accident, just before my 40th birthday. I was feeling old, but when he found out I was turning 40 he started telling me how young I looked and gave me all kinds of compliments. I'm sorry, I know it was wrong but I enjoyed them and liked hearing that I was desirable to a younger man. I felt sexy and he kept flirting and I let it get to me. You're the only man I'd ever been with, and now after 20 years, I felt like a schoolgirl again.

He kept trying to take me to dinner, and the constant flirting made me feel even more sexy. When he took me to lunch that day, he took me straight to his hotel room and said he'd order room service. It only took a few minutes before he seduced me. And I've regretted my actions every minute since. I swear it was only that one time and I'll never do anything like that again."

"Lisa, I noticed how you enjoyed dancing and flirting with the young guys in your office at your birthday party. You'll remember our conversation about it, I'm sure. Well, ever since you started at the Gym with Maria you've changed. To be honest, I don't like the new Lisa and what she's become. I don't blame you for wanting to look young, have excitement in your life, or wanting more than I can give you. I just wish you would have told me instead of looking for something outside our marriage. I don't want to live with that woman, and feel like I need to compete with younger guys, or that you are doing things behind my back. I've lost confidence in myself, our marriage, the trust I had in you, and our life together. That's not a good recipe for a healthy marriage. I'm not sure what you can do to fix things, or if they can ever be fixed." We ate in silence as we digested our conversation.

Roger looked hopeful when we entered the house, but I just shook my head. I thanked him for watching the kids and went up to my bedroom alone. Mary saw Lisa's tears and knew nothing had changed. At least we tried.

A month later Lisa did surprise me when she told me she made reservations for dinner again. This time she was in charge and started the conversation.

"Joel, you were right about everything. I did move on without you for the last two years and only thought of myself as I tried to get my body in shape. What I did was unforgivable, and I cannot take it back or change the past. But let me tell you how I'm going to fix things."

Trying to maintain her calm she continued, "I've been seeing a therapist to help me with the guilt from my actions. Every night I cry for hours thinking how I almost lost my baby boy and destroyed the man I love. My therapist has been a lifesaver, and helped me understand all the pain my selfish actions have caused, and how I hurt you in the worst way possible. She gave me some reasons for my poor choices. She said it was a cry out for attention or maybe a midlife crisis, but I disagreed with her, and I take full responsibility for my actions. I messed up, made bad choices, and convinced myself I deserved to enjoy my new found youth after working so hard to look good. At first, I only did it to get in shape, but after I lost the extra weight, I started to get lots of attention from men, and it made me feel young, sexy, and desirable, which didn't help as I turned 40 years old."

I could tell she was struggling to hold it together and I just sat quietly as she continued, "What's really crazy is that I loved our life, our kids, and our marriage. I never thought of hurting or cheating on you, but that's exactly what happened. It started with innocent flirting, then you saw some of that at my birthday party, but of course I didn't listen. Then it was lunches, and more flirting until I allowed myself to go and screw up my life for a meaningless afternoon of sex. I hate myself for what I did and realize now it's not who I am, and I want you to know how sorry I am for hurting you and the damage I've done to our son. You have no idea the amount of guilt and pain I live with every day.

This was never about my love for you or our marriage. My actions were completely selfish. I was only thinking about myself and what I thought I deserved. What I'm telling you is not an excuse and I don't expect you to forgive me, because I broke my vows, my promise to you, and betrayed your trust and love. I will understand if you want a divorce after what I did and I'll be sad, but you need to be happy and be with someone you can trust. In the meantime, I plan on trying to win you back.

Joel, the last time we had dinner you said I hadn't done anything to save our marriage, and I told you that I was so worried about our son that I didn't know how to save us. After you pointed that out, I spent the last month trying to show you what I've done to get you back."

She was in control of her emotions and spoke in a serious tone, "First of all, I've turned in my resignation today and will be a stay-at-home mom. I'll nurse Jake full-time, and we can get rid of the day nurses. I told Mr. Conner, my boss, about the affair with the supplier. You know all about his standing in the community and church, so while I was there, he called the supplier and said they would cancel their relationship if they didn't fire Donnie immediately. Apparently Scientific Laboratories is their largest customer, and depends on our business for a good percentage of their revenue. I found out before we went out tonight. that it wasn't the first complaint they had received and that Donnie was in fact terminated.

After that, I went to see his wife, Patricia Kelly, and apologized for what we had done. I broke down and cried when I told her the entire story, and how I was trying to fix things with you, the only man I've ever loved. She was much nicer than I would have been, but I think she realized how terrible I was feeling. Patricia tried to comfort me, she said it wasn't all my fault, as Donnie was quite the lady's man and had a talent for seducing women. But she was stern and told me to never disrespect the man I love again. She wished me luck in getting us back together. She said it wasn't the first time this had happened, but that this was the last time. I think she was going to see a lawyer. After I left, I called Maria and told her I was giving up my gym membership. I also plan on continuing therapy. I realize that I'm a grown woman with a family that needs me, and I intend to be the best mom and wife possible, if I'm given the chance again. I also gave all of my new clothes away, and kept only a few things that are more suitable for women my age."