All Comments on 'Cheshire Oaks'

Personally, I prefer that the writer not say anything at all about the story being true or fantasy. That's for the reader to determine for themselves.

But as a fantasy, this one was fun. You didn't pretend to be writing "literature". You said up front that it was fantasy. Only a moron could complain about what you wrote.

...something's missing, and that something is a little more depth about your protagonist. Is he a hound dog who does this regularly? If so, that would explain his lack of concern about getting caught or hurting his wife. If not, if this is his first time at a random encounter like this, where's the tension, the uncertainty, the guilt? What we're left with is a pretty hot sex scene, but one that's ultimately meaningless, both to your protagonist and to the reader. The ending, too, could benefit from a little work; it's an enormous letdown. I know others will disagree, so make up your own mind about my comments.

I have to say that I love fantasy and fantasizing, and the 'too-good-to-be-true' elements of this story fitted my idea of what a fantasy can do. It's where the mind takes a very ordinary situation where all the people are supposed to be behaving themselves, and spins a little magic around at least two of them. One glimpse of the underside of that girl's breast under the t-shirt, and I was hooked - and I'm a gal. I'm looking for the touch of the wand on my fantasies, not the lash of the moralist. This sexy shopping story did it for me. Vanessa

And Border Books, too? Though that closed, didn't it? Pity. I liked that branch.

It was a good fantasy tale nicely told.

Every guys fantasy. Well done.

Ed