Cookie 01

[An older guy and a younger Boi stare at each other over that statement and blink blankly at each other for a moment because hah, this will show that knucklehead, Melvin Melvindale, who is still in charge!]

Well, I should have finished my statement with "you lose sucker, so choke on this sandwich just the same as you hope for me to choke on your throbbing cock" or something like that.

"Well, it is "twiddle your thumbs" Saturday and all, but there was a smash up on the highway, so, now he's out twiddling his thumbs waiting for the State Police to clear the scene from the highway, so, um, were there Boi's like you around when I was younger? I'm asking for a friend, so?"

Look folks, there is two years too old for me and there is six years too old for me, but 36 years too old for me is out of the question!

"Oh, that's not what I meant because I'm just the old guy boss and I just say and ask stupid stuff, so, um, ooh, roast beef and cheddar, alright, tee he, the end???"

OG's, right? And I'm asking because my interaction experience is low.

"I mean, is there a Sal Salvage here? Special delivery from Mildred at the Deli Shop for Sal Salvage, so, is there a Sal Salvage here, calling out Sal..."

"Ah-hah! I knew that woman had an eye ball on me when I put an eye ball on her! [Snatch] give me that sandwich, Boi and what did she say, huh?"

"Her blouse buttons pop right open just after the Line Dance Club closes, so?)"

"Oh, yeah, baby! I'm going to soft twitch a couple of times tonight, baby, oh, yeah!"

Um, never mind with the comments, folks because I think I know everything I need to know about OG's now.

"Um, Sal Salvage, I think Mildred scribbled you a little love note on the inside of the paper wrapper, so?"

[His fingers were not limp as he flipped the wrapper paper around]

"Cha-Ching! That woman has it for me because she looking out for my health because listen to this, "Sal, enjoy your double stacked titty meat, I mean, roast beef sandwich, but no cookie nookie for you as dessert, my sweet" and she dotted the "i's" with a butcher's knife!"

Oh, now I know more than everything I need to know about OG's.

"What's a cookie nookie? Aww, who cares, I'm soft twitching and possibly oozing tonight, baby!"

Update on my OG knowledge base, kill me before I turn 35, please and hank you in advance.

[A broom handle hits the concrete floor]

"OMG! Cookie? Cookie, who actually was everybody's favorite cookie back in school?"

I mean, not "everybody's" favorite and all, so. I've said that already, right?

"Steven? Steven Stevenson? You, you, you, you, you just stay back because we were at a tie at School Spirit Day and that's in our history now!"

Oops, I did not mean to say "in our history" at all, not at all.

"Wait, I agree with that, Cookie and the tie was in your favor, so?"

Well, that's different then, just as long as history shows that the tie was in my favor.

"Are you working here now, Cookie? And what are you working underneath that fine fitting uniform, tee he, huh? Is a certain someone still tossing out challenges that you can't resist, huh?"

"Shut the hell up about that, Steven Stevenson, but, um, well, I knew you were here all the time anyways, so, ta da, I brought you a roast beef and cheddar sandwich!"

Well, that knuckleheaded Melvin Melvindale was out twiddling his thumbs somewhere, so.

[A gawd awful awkward moment inside of a gawd awful smelly tranny fluid transmission shop]

"Well, anyways, Cookie because I mean, um, listen because I mean, um, I have this thing coming up..."

[Tightly squints eyes and crosses fingers and whispers in head]

"(Oh gawd, please don't ask me, please don't ask me, please don't ask me out!)"

"Because I mean, I have this thing coming up and..."

"(No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, please, no!)"

[For some reason, Cookies eyes pop open so wide that a false lash almost flings off]

"I'll go, Steven Stevenson, if you're willing to ask me, then I'm willing to accept. Also, what is this thing, when is this thing and where is this thing, which, tee he, I'm sure you would have explained if I would have just shut it, so?"

"Same ole, Cookie! Always fighting them off before they even pull the snap clap back slap trigger! Anyways, it's the shop floor sweeping awards banquet and I'm up for the smelly transmission shop floor sweeper of the year, so..."

Um, hi folks, I'm Cookie and a couple of people's favorite cookie and I'm stupid! Stupid.

"Tee he, gotcha, Cookie! It's just that there is a bonfire tonight down around Shepard's Bend up the river and you should come, I mean, go since..."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I should "go by myself" because society still has mental issues with a boy taking a Boi to a nighttime bonfire, I get it, so?"

"What? What does my step sister, Society have to do this, huh? Has she said something to you, Cookie?"

Um, hi folks, I'm Cookie and a couple of people's favorite cookie and sometimes I choose the wrong words to use because, duh, Steven Stevenson's step sisters name was Society.

But we left it as "I should go" and that was that, so, fast forwarding through texting Melvin Melvindale and wishing him well with his highway thumb twiddling and scrubbing off my morning makeup and taking a quick nap so I could stay awake past 10pm and then, ugh, take another shower and then, ugh, redoing my makeup and outfit because it's not easy living in the transitional world and all of you out there like me know that! It's a constant and vicious circle. But I made it.

And most of you out there like me know that I had another challenge because an evening bonfire is almost perfect for tight fitting, low rise, Capri jeans over shorts, am I right, my fellow fem Trannies?

Tee he, gotcha because I just wanted comments back about which of you would take me and my Boi booty down in a low-rise jeans battle! I mean, I have a really nice pair of high wasted jeans that hang off of my booty quite nicely, so, that's what I choose to wear to the bonfire, but since I'm a sucker for challenges, my transitional babies, paint them on and let's line it up!

Also, that guy, erg, that guy, Melvin Melvindale, challenged me to jeans battle with a few of the trans hotties on Chang while he takes the proof positive photographs inside of my house and if I lose, I mean, my sex on you is your way while you sex up that guy, erg, that guy, Melvin Melvindale, so, um, I mean, I'll do it because I'm challenged spelled, the end!

Also, also, Frankie Jaye, you are excluded! Because I want a fighting chance.

[Whew, later that night at the Shepard's Bend bonfire after all that vicious circle stuff]

"Well, tee he, Cookie, how many convenience store fountain sodas with lids and bendy straws did you bring along with you because nothing about a riverside bonfire says beer, so?"

"Oh, shush it, Ben Benson! But Clyde from the "Stop & Rob" convenience store put together a box full and packed them in ice, so, are we officially on speaking terms then, Ben Benson, hmm? Also, Clyde slipped in a long box of beer without ice into the back of my truck, so."

Well, that statement made a couple of people move quick enough! I mean, I hope I had enough sodas with lids and bendy straws, right, folks?

"Oh, are we speaking about that time when we waded out in the wading pond last summer, huh, Cookie?"

Whew. That was some kind of water wading we did! And I probably should have, but I didn't. And that's probably why Ben Benson stopped talking to me for a while. But it was a perfect moment, so, my bad, I guess because that was so hot, so hot.

"[Glug, glug] club jeans at a bonfire, Cookie?"

Oh, that was a nice glow up about my jeans, right? Club jeans sounds nice, right?

"I mean, Chester Chesterfield, what was I wear then, hmm? Shorts like literally half of the girls that I can see right now or low-rise jeans like the other half that I can see, hmm?"

By the way, ahem, my fellow fem Tranny friends, ahem, you set me up with your comments back! A bonfire is almost a jammies event! And you all knew that! And then, meaning and now, I have to stay by the tailgate of my truck because I wore my best club high waisted jeans! Sheesh. Some friends.

[A poor attempt at shrugging shoulders in anger and disgust, but the high waisted jeans do look great]

"Oh, oh, oh, I'll take please, for a soda with a lid and bendy straw, please and thank you."

"Oh, gladly because this bonfire night isn't going as planned because [starts to hand off the soda with a lid and bendy straw and stops short], what, OMG (hiss), what are you doing here, Frankie Jaye? I specifically called you out to stay away! And why are you wearing such fine fitting low rise jeans to a bonfire anyways, hmm?"

"(Grr!) Oh, I'm being nice by not calling you out back, Cookie with two for a cookie topping!"

Um, two plus, so.

"And I'm here because you blogged about it and I brought some trans friends and OMG, I'm here because that disgusting guy, that guy, Melvin Melvindale, challenged me to take you down in a bonfire Boi booty battle challenge and if I win, then you suck off my cookie and he gets my nookie because for some stupid reason, ugh, that guy, that disgusting guy, Melvin Melvindale, always wins! [Eyes spinning wildly like a red pill was involved]"

"(Hiss!) Calm down, Frankie Jaye and take a couple of sips of liquid sugar to reverse the spell."

[Slurp, sip, slurp, sip, slurp, sip, ahh, the spinning eyes start to slow, ahh]

"Holy hell, what am I doing on a public riverbank dressed like this! Oh, oh well, I see men and oops, I see that hunky Fred Fredericks milling about over there, so, is this an open party or do you own them all, Cookie, hmm?"

Oh, for like my sixth first of all, hah, I wish I owned literally anybody!

"Ahem."

"OMG, Billie Jaye, you to?"

"Give me a name, Vanilla Wafer, give a name at this bonfire that you've left hanging, left with blue balls, left him scrambling, left him wondering what could have been, left him wishing he had never hooked up with you, hump teased him, twerk teased him, hand grope teased him, arm hanging teased..."

"Ben, Ben Benson! And roll your shorts down, for Pete's sakes! This isn't a jammies party!"

Wait, tee he, I just said that, right?

"Whoo-hoo."

"Aw, come on, Bobbie Jaye, aw, screw it, Peter Peterson."

Well, Pete is nice and all and once asked me to host a trans sleep over, so.

"Psst, what's happening here, Cookie?"

"Oh, Steven Stevenson, it's a trans take over of the bonfire, so?"

"Oh, I can see that, but, um, um..."

"A hook up fest, Steven Stevenson, everybody is hooking up!"

"Yeah but, Cookie, yeah but, Cookie, yeah but..."

"OMG, I'm sure that Joie Jaye is waiting in the shadows for..."

"Ahem."

"Bye, Steven Stevenson and hello, Joie Jaye."

I mean, is this how it looks on the beaches when the sea turtles hook up? And on a side subject, I mean, humans are the only living beings who suck off their partners, right, because I mean, those sharks and snapping turtles, right? Yikes!

"Oh, Cookie, I mean, why are you sitting all alone on your tailgate in those fancy jeans because I saw you walking around a little bit ago and they made you look a little taller, so?"

"(Stay seated, stay seated, stay seated) I'm not in the mood Carl Carlson. But how are you these days, hmm? (Bounce legs, bounce legs, bounce legs)"

"Oh, I'm in mood to take a walk down the riverbank and look for snapping turtles, so, are you in that kind of mood, Cookie, huh?"

I mean, somebody just said that I looked a little taller and I didn't want to ruin that since I am a bit of a compact cookie, so.

"I mean, Carl Carlson, I mean, the snapping turtles would just start snipping at my toes and then I would get the bottom of my fine ass club jeans dirty, so, I mean, next time for sure, Carl Carlson, but, um, hold please."

[Peeks around towards the front of the truck]

"Andy Jaye, is there any chance that you've finished rummaging through the rear seats of my truck yet, hmm? My friend, Carl Carlson, has, um, has a snapping turtle, so?"

[A head, a cute faced head, pops out of the rear door of the truck where they were rummaging]

"What? Oh, well, well, well, so, once again the Cookie is holding tight to the nookie, hmm? Also, hey there, hey, Carl Carlson. See any open spots along the snapping turtle riverbank, hmm?"

Well, that didn't take much.

End Cookie 01