Cream & Coco Ch. 04

All characters are at least 18 years old.

-----

My son was still gone when morning came. Nobody had called back with word from him, if my empty voicemail was anything to go by. His phone was missing, as was his schoolbag and a pair of his shoes. Evidently, he had stolen in at some point and taken what he needed for the day without disturbing me. He was avoiding me, but at least he was safe.

I sighed, still tired from restless sleep, and went to the common bathroom to get ready for the day. I had totally forgotten to schedule for somebody to fix my ensuite bathroom mirror and faucet, but in my defense, it had been an abnormal few days. I still felt sick with worry, not assuaged by the fact that Drew had fled to some girl's house. Stefan had described her as a mutual friend. I knew Stefan and Sabrina, and Drew's basketball teammates. Never had a Lexi Rochester come up in conversation. Or maybe she had, and it had seemed so inconsequential that I had let myself forget. Whoever she was, Drew trusted her more than he did Stefan. Did he finally have a girlfriend? If so, then why didn't I feel joy for him instead of unease?

I found myself at the office. It was one of those times where one's body goes on full autopilot, where even navigating through traffic can be shunted off to your instincts so that your conscious mind can focus on the matter at hand. Sometimes it can end up feeling quite surreal.

"Holy hell, Coco."

I pulled myself out of the reverie to watch as Jazz, who had apparently been walking past the elevators, detoured to come fetch me. I had just been standing on the spot, zoned out. She took one look at the dark circles under my eyes and winced, taking me by the arm and dragging me to our desks.

"That bad, huh?" she murmured. "Listen, I'm sorry. I was just trying to look out for you, that's all. Did he try to force you into something?"

Leon. She was talking about Leon, I reminded myself.

"No, everything was fine," I replied airily. "I mean, it didn't work out, but the date was fine. Complete gentleman, like you said."

Jazz ushered me into my cubicle, where she sat me down on my chair and squatted in front of me. "Coco, it's alright. You can tell me." She looked deadly serious. "Whatever he told you so you keep your mouth shut, it's illegal. If he did any damn thing to you, you bet we gonna git his ass."

Christ, she thought Leon had raped me and then threatened my job or something to keep me quiet. I could practically see HR kicking down Leon's office door in her mind's eye.

"No, no," I rushed out. She looked at me with both sympathy and skepticism, and I blurted, "It's Drew." That caught her off guard.

"Drew?"

Oh no, what was I supposed to tell her? That my son had tried ripping my clothes off to have sex with me? That in all my protectiveness, I had lost track of my son for an entire night? That my son was jealous of my boss?

My God. Drew was jealous of Leon for my attentions? No, no, it was quite literally for my time and attention. That had to be it. Otherwise it would mean that what he had wasn't a fetish, and he truly harbored these feelings for me. Was it because Sabrina was unavailable? Then what about this Lexi? Was she even a classmate of his? What if it was some middle-aged hussy trying to seduce him for her own pleasure? But Stefan had said she was a *mutual* friend... Before I knew it, my mind was a ball of yarn, tangled this way and that.

"Is everything alright?" Leon asked.

Jazz and I snapped our heads up to look at him. His expression was somewhere between curiosity, concern, and bewilderment. Jazz hopped to her feet and straightened out her clothes before returning to her desk, at one point slyly giving Leon a dirty look. I'd have to set her straight sometime; he didn't deserve to be the subject of suspicion.

"I'm fine," I stammered, adding a slightly shrill laugh for effect.

"You look... a little worse for wear," he said carefully. "Certainly not like how you were when I dropped you off last night. Does it have something to do with me?"

"No, it's... It's my son. Last night, he stayed at a friend's house without telling me, and I was just losing my mind a bit."

Aside from the choice omissions, it was entirely true. It seemed enough to convince Leon, who nodded understandingly. "Pretty much exactly what we talked about last night, huh? Kids always manage to keep your hands full." I managed a laugh, and he smiled. "Look, why don't you take a half day off to get yourself sorted. He's probably at school now anyway, but you can catch him in the afternoon to talk things out."

That was pretty generous, especially considering we were busier than normal at this time of year. But I doubted I was going to be very productive today anyway. I gave a hesitant nod, and Leon grunted in approval.

"Want me to ask Jasmine to look after you?"

I spied Jazz craning her neck to look over the divider, and I shook my head. "I think I just need some time to myself. Ourselves."

"Good. I hope things work out. You can leave at lunch. I'll see you on Monday, Colette." He rapped his knuckles on the cubicle wall twice before leaving. Jazz tried to talk to me but I just shook my head and focused on getting at least a little work done for the day.

--

Leaving work at lunch time meant there were still a few hours before Drew came home. If he came home. I managed to schedule some handymen to come repair my bathroom, and by the time they were done, school should have let out. Like the kids had mentioned, they didn't have sports practice anymore, so he should've been back.

Should I go to his school and look for him? No, I reminded myself. He needed space and time. Feeling restless, I got in my car and just drove. I could see why men went for a drive to clear their heads. I hadn't understood the notion before, and simply viewed it as a waste of gas. It was slightly... meditative. As cheesy as it sounded, I felt more at peace about the situation. It would work out.

I looked out my car window and found myself downtown. From here I could see a squat building with the word "Taboo" in unlit purple and magenta neon on the facade. Seemed a bit small for a night club. I felt a bout of melancholy at the realization that I'd never been to a party. Not like the company Christmas parties we had every year, but an honest-to-God drinks-and-dancing party.

And now I was past that period of my life. I rested my head on the steering wheel. So much for a meditative drive. I was having a midlife crisis ten years too early. But I have Drew, I thought to myself, and I smiled. I regretted nothing.

I came to another red light and this time I spotted a store. My eyes widened. A sex shop. Guess I was in that part of town. Immediately, Jazz's voice spoke up in my mind. "Live a little, girl! I told you to get a toy, didn't I?" And I most certainly gave her a reply.

*Why not?*

--

What was I even doing in here?

I was convinced I was sweating buckets, but nobody paid me any mind. The walls were lined with rows and rows of... products. There were also shelves stacked with bottles of lubricant, as well as what looked like packages of themed costumes for the bedroom. They even sold scandalous undergarments: panties with slits down the middle, cupless bras, and some of the most intricate harnesses I'd ever seen. I didn't dare study any one thing too long, lest I give away my inexperience. I just put on my best casual, slightly disinterested expression as I browsed around the store. I didn't even know what I was looking for.

I glanced around the store and locked eyes with her. The girl who had been following me with her gaze for the past ten minutes. She wasn't wearing a store uniform like the other two employees. She was young, probably still in her teens. Honey blonde and what looked like -- at least from this distance -- stormy grey eyes. Her stare was sharp, not some dull-witted little girl looking to spend some money. She had purpose.

Her eyes passed over me as if she were scanning the room, but I had already caught her peeking my way a couple of times using the mirrors in the shop. I huffed and walked right up to her, and she feigned surprise.

"Can I help you?" I asked calmly.

She blinked at me. "Excuse?" She spoke with a slight accent. Russian, maybe.

"You've been watching me this whole time. Did you want something?"

She smiled sheepishly. "You look like you are new. Do not know what to buy."

"I..." I didn't know what to say.

"I help. I am Sasha."

I shook her offered hand. "Coco." Damn, did I just tell her my real name? Was I supposed to make one up in a shop like this?

Without letting go of my hand, she pulled me over to a wall covered in toys for women. The selection really was mind-boggling. Some looked like large pills. Some looked like microphones. One of them had two extra extensions coming off the main shaft, making it look like a cactus. Honestly, it was intimidating.

"Is first time?" Sasha asked sympathetically. I only nodded with a gulp. "For yourself or with partner?"

"I... Um... Myself, just myself." I couldn't believe it. I was taking sexual advice from a girl half my age. She took one of the microphones off the peg, eyed it, then looked me up and down before putting it back. Instead she picked a pill, one of the shorter ones, and nodded approvingly as she handed it to me.

"Small. Not go very deep. Very good for using outside."

I balked. "I am *not* using this in public," I stage whispered, and she looked abashed.

"No, no. For when you do not put in. You use on outside."

"Oh. Right." I had to preserve some dignity by pretending I knew what I was talking about. But I didn't. I felt like a child with how embarrassed I was as I bought the toy, avoiding eye contact with the clerk. Sasha left with me, and I peered into the nondescript black plastic bag at my new purchase. "Well, thank you for your help, Sasha. I don't know what I would've done without you."

She smiled brightly, then frowned. "You know how to use?"

"Oh. Well... It can't be that hard, right?" I laughed weakly. She gave me a vulpine grin and beckoned for me to follow.

She led me to a cafe not far down the road, and we sat down and ordered our drinks. What a strange day it was turning out to be. It certainly fit the past week so far.

"Thank you," I said as the waitress set down my latte.

"*Spasibo,*" Sasha added before sipping her mocha.

What had compelled me to follow this girl? Was it her charm? She definitely had a certain charisma about her.

"So," she began. "You say you use toy alone. Do you have boyfriend?"

"Oh, no. Definitely not."

"You are the lesbian?"

I almost facepalmed. Of course she'd think that when I answered so strongly. "I didn't mean that. It's just... It's complicated."

She nodded as if I had just said something philosophical. "You are nervous. Not relaxed around stranger girl." She winked. "Then let us not be strangers. You ask me anything."

I blinked. "You... You want to be friends with an older woman like me?"

"Not question I was expecting," Sasha laughed. "But yes. You do not?"

"It's not that," I said quickly. She was being so nice, and I didn't want to be rude. "Alright, well... Your accent. It's Russian, right?"

She smiled. "*Da.*"

"Just checking. Then are you from around here?"

"I visit friends." That ruled out the possibility that Drew went to school with her. Perhaps it was best she didn't know I had a son her age. "They have good news to share. Tell interesting stories."

"Say... Sasha, can I ask you a question?"

"You are already asking question," she said with a giggle. That made me laugh, but I wanted to quickly move forward before I lost my nerve.

"You know your way around that shop, right?"

"*Da.*"

"So that means you probably have a bit of experience?"

Sasha studied me. "You are troubled. You do not feel you have enough experience?" When I hesitated, she took my hand. "It is alright. You can tell me. I have nobody else to tell." She chuckled. "Safety in telling stranger secret."

She had a point. Not much to lose by telling a random girl. It wasn't as if it would get back to people I knew. "Well, I'm having trouble with this boy."

"Is boy you like?" she asked, eyes glittering with interest. I absolutely couldn't tell Jazz that I had gabbed about boys with somebody other than her.

"Yes, but I think he likes me in a different way."

Sasha's eyes widened. "Is love," she gasped. "He feels love for you."

"Well, I mean, he's really important to me too. I just don't know if it's right that he loves me like that." Gah, I was bending the truth. What kind of advice was I even expecting if the other party didn't have the facts? But I had to let it out somehow. I couldn't tell Jazz or Leon, or my parents. I'd test the waters with Sasha, see how she reacted.

"And why do you think it is not right to love you? You are beautiful woman, you deserve love too!" Thankfully she had let go of my hand by this point, or I might have begun getting the wrong idea about her. But she was missing what I was saying. As I floundered for another way to explain the predicament I was in, she shot out another question. "Do you want this boy?"

And for the life of me I couldn't tell her no. It wasn't that I desired Drew, however much my dreams said differently. I was just so confused by the events of the past few days, and I wanted my son back. I hadn't even planned what to say to him, but at least we'd be able to talk. "I just want him by my side."

She nodded carefully, a thoughtful expression on her face. "How about this. Go home tonight, and use toy while thinking about him. And tomorrow you come talk to me. Tell me what you think of boy. And tell me what you think of toy," she added with a wink.

"Tomorrow?" I echoed blankly.

"We are friends, no?" She looked a bit crestfallen. I quickly nodded and she beamed. "Then I will help you with this boy. Come back here tomorrow afternoon, we will talk more."

Before we left, I excused myself and went to the restroom. I gazed at my reflection in the mirror. I had looked like a total mess this morning, yet for some reason I seemed rejuvenated. Maybe it was Sasha. It was such a breath of fresh air, strange as it was for us to be friends. Taking a deep breath, I headed back out.

Sasha was looking at the vibrator under the table, and began explaining to me the different ways I could pleasure myself with it. She went into detail about the pros and cons of having the remote be connected to the pill, which she called a bullet. I think I maintained a blush through the whole conversation. Thanking her for her help, we finished our coffee and parted ways after exchanging phone numbers.

Time for a talk with Drew.

--

He wasn't home. However, I found a note, saying he would be staying at a friend's again for the night. Lexi, I thought darkly. For some reason, I felt sick to my stomach. I crumpled the note up and sighed. Drew had been home to leave a note. If I had stayed, I would've caught him. Instead I had been out buying a sex toy. Appetite gone, I made a light salad for dinner and decided to retire for the night.

My body was burning up. I should have known better than to drink coffee so late in the afternoon. Restless, I finally got around to examining my new vibrator properly. It was elegant, in an unassuming way. Nothing garish about it. No frills, bells, or whistles. Just an oblong piece of plastic with a wire running to its controls. After socketing the batteries, I turned the thing on and watched the bullet vibrate in my palm. Sasha said that I didn't have to penetrate myself with this, and I could instead explore around my clitoris.

I changed into my sleep shirt, forgoing the panties as I laid in bed. Turning the bullet back on, I slowly brought it to my nethers, legs splayed wide. I was suddenly glad that Drew wasn't home. I hesitated. Its buzzing was a bit daunting, and I gulped before deciding to forge ahead. The bullet touched my clitoris and a bolt of lightning shot up my spine and flashed the back of my eyes, blinding me. I lost my grip on it, and it took me a moment to regain my breath and pick it up again.

Turning down the power setting, I once more touched it to my little nub. It was pleasant in a fuzzy kind of way. Relaxing, even. The light behind my eyes less of a blast now, and more of a simmer. I hummed approvingly and moved it around my hood, shivering as I felt excitement I'd never felt before. It seemed Sasha knew what she was talking about. After seeing that cactus of a dildo, I might have fled out the store had it not been for her.

*Use the toy while thinking about him.*

I involuntarily conjured up an image of Drew on his knees, moaning to me as he ejaculated onto the floor. I shouldn't have seen that, but nothing could be done now. In my fantasy, he was letting loose spurt after spurt of discharge. *Oh grow up, Coco.* He couldn't stop cumming, and I licked my lips. In front of him was a growing pool of whiteness, as each shot added to his evident lust for me. It was for me. It was all for me. My body felt so hot, it was almost unbearable.

"That's it, baby," I whispered. "Cum for me. Don't stop. Cum for mommy."

My eyes popped open, realizing what I'd just said. But it was too late. Spasms racked my body, yet my fingers kept the bullet locked against my clit as the sensation shot through me. I realized halfway through that I was letting out one long stuttered moan. The earlier simmer was boiling over now, and I couldn't contain it at all. The moment seemed to stretch until I couldn't take it anymore and collapsed. I'd been arching my back the whole time.

Spent, I just barely managed to turn the vibrator off before drifting off to sleep. Was that what an orgasm felt like?

I could get used to this.