Crushed Pt. 02

"I take it this means no after party?"

"No," Alex said sternly and Logan huffed.

"Well that's disappointing. You look very fuckable right now."

Alex blushed and Logan moaned, "oh stop you're torturing me blushing like that."

"You are hurt. Rest," Alex insisted, moving to take off Logan's clothes. Logan helped, but his drunken hands were more of a hindrance than a help. Soon he was in his boxers under the covers and sighing contentedly. He beckoned for Alex to join but Alex shook his head.

"In a minute, I need to tidy up this first," he said gesturing to the bloody flannel and stained clothes at his feet. He took them to the bathroom, leaving them to soak in cool water in the bathtub. By the time he returned to the bedroom Logan was motionless, his mouth ajar, his breathing slow.

When he shuffled into the bed beside him, Logan mumbled something incoherent and lifted his arm for Alex to cuddle beside him. Careful not to touch any of the bruising he leant against his chest and Logan heaved a heavy half asleep sigh.

"I love you," he murmured, so quietly it was barely audible.

And Alex, unsure if Logan was even really awake whispered back, "I love you too, Logan."

**

The next morning Alex woke slowly. He relished in the warmth of his bed, the weight of Logan's arm lying over his chest. He glanced at his alarm clock and saw it was almost midday. He groaned and turned to look at Logan, his face was stained with reddish purple bruising, the swelling on his eye had gone down but he had the start of an impressive black eye.

Alex couldn't hold back the grimace of sympathetic pain. He got out of bed as gently as he could, lowering Logan's arm down gingerly. Logan moaned in his sleep but didn't wake. Alex went downstairs and made tea, and got some fresh water and painkillers for Logan. He returned to the bed and sat, the movement causing Logan to stir.

He opened his eyes blearily and then closed them again groaning, lifting his palm to his forehead.

"Ugh, my head," he mumbled.

"I've got painkillers," Alex said and Logan opened his eyes a fraction, reaching for them and the glass of water that Alex held out.

"I can't remember having a hangover this bad in a while," he moaned and Alex grimaced.

"It might also be because of your fight? You look pretty awful," Alex admitted and Logan looked at him in confusion, his normally bright eyes red and dull.

"Fight? What do you..." Logan's confused expression froze and slowly his eyes widened as he remembered what had happened. "Oh. Oh no no no no no," Logan said in horror, sitting bolt upright, feeling around the bed for something.

"Where's my phone?" He cried. Alex scanned the room and saw his jacket on the back of the chair he had thrown it over last night. He reached into the pocket and retrieved Logan's phone, handing it to him.

"Here."

Logan grabbed it and began scrolling through his phone. Alex sat beside him and looked over his shoulder. Logan didn't try to stop him.

He had so many notifications it had drowned his phone screen. He read a few of the first few.

"Can't believe Chris posted that, are you ok?"

"Hey I saw Facebook.... Is it true? If so man know were here for you, we aren't all like Chris. He's always been a cunt."

"Hey, you ok?x"

Logan went wordlessly to Facebook and found the status that his friends were referring to.

Chris Long: Can't believe a guy I used to call my best friend was actually a fag all along. Disgusting. #whoknew

Top Comments:

Sarah Langton: Who?!?

Lois Barrett: Logan Conners!!! They had a fight at my party! I'll text u xx

Fiona White: Wow really @Lois? I thought he was straight as they come!

Lois Barrett: Makes sense why he dumped me I guess!!

Hannah Holmes: Dick move posting this Chris... hope you're ok @Logan Conners

Ben Smith: Lol it's always the dickhead homophobes who end up gay all along. Maybe you next @Chris Long lol

Chris Long: Fuck off.

"I can't believe he did that," Logan whispered weakly. "He... he outed me to everyone we know."

"Most people are being supportive," Alex said tentatively.

"I don't care about them!" Logan sobbed, he threw his phone hard across the room and it smashed the screen. He clutched his legs close to himself and began to cry. Alex looked at him, shocked and unsure what to do or what to say. He put his hand on Logan's shoulder, and was relieved that he didn't shrug him off. Instead he leant into him and Alex put his arm around him, offering silent support. He trembled against him.

"Who is it? Who are you so afraid of?" Alex whispered.

"Dad," he choked out. "I told him a long time ago that I thought I liked boys. He said that if I ever... he said the family would disown me."

"What?! You never told me," Alex said in horror.

"I... I couldn't. I told you about my friends because that's easy for me to understand. But Dad? I have spent my whole life trying to be good enough for him, and I'm always letting him down!"

"You're not! How are you letting him down?"

"You don't understand Alex. You don't know him. He... punishes me when I don't do what he tells me to do. Fuck! He's going to be so mad."

Logan began to bang his first into the side of his head and Alex had to pull on his arm with all his strength to stop him. He sobbed a loud gut wrenching cry, and Alex felt tears spring to his own eyes.

It felt like the final puzzle piece was falling into place. As a teenager, Logan felt like he might be gay and was afraid of what his Dad would say, so he lashed out against the only person he knew who may have understood him. Alex. As he got older, he surrounded himself with homophobic laddish boys and went on to sleep with dozens of girls to try and crush that side of him. He felt out of control of his life, so he went into overdrive seeking to regain control through his relationships. It wasn't just that Logan had changed over the last few weeks, it was that he was finally letting his guard down. A guard he had spent years creating. A guard that had just been completely destroyed by Chris.

Alex had no words to soothe the pain and fear he was feeling. He felt overwhelmed by pure shock. Logan's Dad had always seemed so nice, welcoming and charismatic. But behind the scenes... He just held Logan as tightly as he could, hoping that it would be enough. Slowly Logan quietened, the violent shakes subsiding until eventually he was still, breathing softly. He lifted his head, rubbing the tears from his face, and looked at Alex.

"I'm sorry," he croaked.

"What for?"

"Everything. Everything I've ever done to you. I'll never stop being sorry, I'll never forgive myself."

"I've told you-"

"I don't care. I'll spend every day that you will let me making it up to you."

Alex smiled softly, but it faltered quickly. "Do you think your Dad knows?"

"If not yet, he will soon," he said darkly. "Can I stay here for a bit? Until he calms down?"

"Of course, although don't forget my parents are back in a few days. It's been a month."

"Wow. I guess it has... then I'll have to go back to Leeds."

Alex felt a pang in his chest.

"You'll leave? So soon?"

"Well I have to go back for Uni soon anyway," he said, turning to Alex, his face still puffy with tears, his eyes sad and almost desperate. "I... I have no right to ask you this..."

"What?"

"Come with me."

To be continued...?

Please comment if you enjoyed this story and would like to read more, if it gets enough interest I currently have COVID and am isolating on my own so could get another part out soon! :)