Damaged Beyond Repair?

"I made such good choices those days." She said bitterly.

"You've got two sons out of it. That's something to show for. We'll talk about it later." Bart said and squeezed her arm lightly.

The evening was a happy affair. The young ones had a blast. Bart taught them how to handle his firepit and how to roast the sausages above it. With the help of Linda, he had made some salads and wrapped pre-cooked potatoes with butter and herbs in aluminum foil to accompany the sausages.

One of Bart's other protégés brought a guitar and the five were merrily singing cracks in the windows.

Bart and Linda were sitting under the balcony watching them. Suddenly Bart said, "When I saw you at Martin and Carlos' party, I lost it. My apologies for that."

Linda didn't know what to say, just nodded and kept still.

Bart went on, "I lost it again when Martin and Carlos called me on the first 'away 'day of my holiday, telling me that I had been rude. I asked to apologize on my behalf, but they tried to force me to do it in person. The first contact with them was after I came back from my vacation."

It was silent for a moment as Bart gathered his thoughts. He took a breath and went on. "Just before I left for Zaragoza, I bought myself a small electric motorcycle. The first time I used it was just after I, full of anger, threw my phone in the glove box. That bike drives completely different from what I was used to, and I needed all my faculties to keep it on the road. It emptied my mind. When I was back at the camping site I had calmed down and started to think instead of being angry. I realized that I have been angry since you served me with the divorce papers. Suddenly I understood that I needed help."

Linda looked at the man she had abandoned so many years ago and put him through hell for so long. Her heart cried inside her.

But Bart went on, "I found a counselor, an old cynical coot named Andreas Woijeck and he put me straight."

He fell silent, remembering the pain, embarrassment and anguish in those sessions, the frustration when Andreas chipped away brick for brick from his emotional bastion. Telling him time after time, each time in different wordings "You are human. You have feelings and emotions. If you suppress them and don't relinquish them, they are going to poison you and your future life will be lonelier and grayer when you get older. It ruined at least onetwo relationships before they even took off properly."

A few seconds later Bart went on, "Don't get me wrong. It was a difficult and very painful process, but that and the joy of coaching these five young ones brought me to the place I am now. Now I can talk with you without anger and frustration over something that happened decades ago. I should never have disappeared like that."

Linda looked into the darkness that had descended over the garden without consciously seeing. Her mind was a whirlwind. Finally, she dared to ask, "You're not mad at me anymore?"

"No, not anymore. I should have let that go a long time ago. Maybe, if I did, I would have found someone to share my life with instead of being the eternal, eligible bachelor."

Appalled, Linda asked, "You've never had another woman in your life?"

"Yes, two, one went sour soon. Mostly my fault. I doneven want to remember the other one. After the last, there were some who were interested in me, but I shot it down as soon as they started to breach my mental defenses. I've been a grumpy old loner for a long time. Luckily I have started leaving that behind now."

Tears ran silently from Linda's cheeks while she softly said, "All because I let myself be poisoned by a bunch of shallow, egocentric so-called friends who didn't like you because you didn't fit in their view of their little perfect world. Bart, I am so sorry. I really want to apologize for what I did to you."

"Linda, it's all water under the bridge now. I just need to find myself a new life again."

The rest of the evening was spent in a companionable atmosphere.

When it was almost time to say goodbye Marc asked Bart, "You have a RV don't you?"

"Yes, I have and I'm proud to say that I built it mostly by myself."

"I would like to see that, and I think my brother too, can we?"

"My vacation comes up in two weeks now. It will be on my driveway next week. Since I have to coach your bunch, I have to adhere to the school holidays."

"Where are you going?" Marc asked.

Alagón, about 25 kilometers from Zaragoza Airport in Spain. I have friends there that I visit each year and after that? I don't know yet."

Marc kept asking questions about the route he would take, and Bart was caught up in the enthusiasm of the young man. Finally, he said, "If you have a tent, I can give you a lift, you can spend about a week in ZAZ and fly back with the Antonov. Maybe your brother will like to go too?"

Marc beamed at the proposal until Bart continued, "I know that both of you are officially adults, but I would like to have your mother's permission. If only as a gesture of respect towards her."

That evening he got a phone call from Linda. "Are you serious? she asked. "You really want to put up with those words boys for two whole weeks?"

"If Bart is anything like Marc, I will enjoy myself immensely, I think. So yes." Bart replied

"And I can use some 'me-time'. Please take good care of them. What are your plans?"

"I'll take them with me to my destination. There I will put your sons in the plane back. I still have four weeks after they fly home. Two weeks with my friends in a village near Zaragoza and two weeks for the long way home."

=====

Eleven days into the vacation Bart and the two young men returned from a long and arduous hike at the French side of the Pyrenees. Bart had found a small camping site near Seix. Tomorrow they would start the last part of their journey towards Alagón, a small village near Zaragoza where Bart's friends lived.

Their time together was precious to Bart. Lots of fun interspersed with serious conversations about everything and more. The boys, and Bart too, had opened up to each other.

Without prompting they told Bart about Linda's life and that she often was a little depressed. They also told Bart about their father, they hardly saw each other, but when he visited, he was abusive towards Linda. Blaming her for becoming pregnant and letting him pay for the two little bastards so now he couldn't live the life he wanted.

Bart now knew that Linda had always done her utmost to raise the boys and to give them what they needed. Their father only provided for their tuition and for the rest was absent. Grudgingly, he had to admit that he started to feel some admiration for Linda.

After all she raised two well behaved intelligent young men and he liked them very much.

The three of them were having supper in the shade of a big sycamore when Marc's phone went off.

He took a look at it and said, "It's mum. That's odd. We just called yesterday."

He took the call and during the conversation his face became clouded. Suddenly he said, "Our father is pestering her and she's afraid. He is threatening her with all sorts of things.

"She's with Martin and Carlos now because he doesn't want to leave her house. He said that he paid for it and it's his. She called the Police, but it will take a while before they can evict him legally."

Bart thought furiously and suddenly found a solution. Possibly not entirely legal, but a short-term solution non the lest. He asked for the phone, saying, "Maybe I can help."

Marc handed him the phone and Bart said, "Linda, Martin and Carlos have a spare key to my house, would you like to stay there for the time being? In the meantime, I'll take care of you ex."

He listened intently and said to the sobbing woman, "One moment, I'll have to talk to the boys.

He turned around and said, "Linda is now afraid of being alone, her hosts are going on vacation the day after tomorrow and your grandparents are on a trip in Italy. If I can convince your mum to stay in Alagón with my friends and you are staying in my house. Can you manage? I think that your mum needs a bit of distance while I arrange someone who convinces your father to leave the house voluntarily."

The two young men nodded enthusiastically, and Bart said to Linda, "How about a vacation in Spain while I try to solve your problem? All for free, at least if you can tolerate my company"

Another short silence and Bart said, "No, I'll arrange everything including transport. You'll see your boys before they leave for home."

Bart sighed and said to Marc and Bart, "Okay, she's coming. And through the phone, "Don't bother with clothes too much. There are shops here too."

Again, some silence. "No, Bart replied. "The boys are staying at my place for the duration because they have to be back for their holiday jobs, and they don't mind at all. Now please give me Martin."

In the moment that Linda was looking for Martin, Bart said to the boys, "Don't try to solve it by yourself. It seems that your father is off the rails mentally. Keep your distance until I tell you that you can go home, please?"

Bart said, only half-jokingly, "Yes dad. You know that you did more for us in two weeks than our actual dad our whole lives?"

Bart blushed at the compliment but before he could reply he heard Martin's voice.

"Hi Martin, I need a favor. Can you put Linda on the Antonov to Zaragoza as a deadweight passenger the day after tomorrow? She's out of your hair and you can go holidaying. I'll take care of her at this end and of her ex."

There was some talk at the other end of the phone and Bart interrupted it somewhat crusty, "No, I have my reasons and no I'm not going to bite her head off and yes, she deserves a break and yes; I'll explain later."

He asked Marc, "I think your mum would like to talk to you both now. Try to calm her down and after that start packing. We'll be leaving very early tomorrow. Your mother will arrive the day after tomorrow in Zaragoza. "

He handed the phone back and walked away, taking out his own gsm.

When the two young men were done talking to their mother, they heard Bart talking in rapid Spanish with someone at the other end of the line. After a while he hung up and said, "That's arranged. She can stay with my friends and someone will go and talk to your father and make him see reason."

=====

The next morning, they departed at the crack of dawn. Bart explained that it was about 400 kilometers by road but that it was a difficult drive and the old Unimog wasn't, even though it brought you anywhere you wanted, a very fast vehicle. With a regular car it could be done in about seven hours, but with the Unimog, he estimated, half as long again. He was the only one with a truck driving license and he needed his rest too.

During the journey Bart's mind was all over the place. He tried to reason why he offered Linda to come to Spain and particularly to his safe haven from the hectic world. The tranquil atmosphere made it the only place where he could write some lyrics and put them to music and after two weeks with two energetic young adults, he also craved to be alone.

So, why did he invite Linda?

He also noted that the engine was becoming tired and raw. That was to be expected with well over 350,000 kilometers on the clock. It was going to need a rigorous overhaul or to be replaced by a newer one.

"Men," he said, "I have an assignment for you, if you want it."

Marc and young Bart looked at him, their faces expressing unbelieve. Bart laughed out loud, "It's not what you think. You might enjoy this one. This engine needs a major overhaul, or it needs to be replaced. When you are at my place can you investigate what is best? You know, considering the cost of the parts, the amount of work and so on and compare that with that of a replacement engine?"

He saw their faces lighten up. He knew that they would like that. He went on, "I also know a place where you can rent a spot to work on a car and ask for help if one needs it. Would you like to help me with it?"

"Yes." Came simultaneously out of two mouths. "That would be so cool." Young Bart said.

Excitingly making plans, the two had, for the moment, forgotten why they were pushing so hard for their final destination.

They arrived thirteen hours after they rolled off the camping site at Seix. Bart had called his friends with an eta and his assessment was way off due to some detours. The infamous 'deviations' in France had struck mercilessly and in such a way they even the sat-nav was upset.

When the truck rumbled into the cul-de-sac where the house was situated, his friend of old stood in the doorway.

Bart, Marc and young Bart climbed out of the RV and Bart stretched to ease the knots in his shoulders.

The man walked up to Bart and hugged him. While doing so a young man and woman tore out of the house. They slammed into Bart and hugged him as if their lives depended on it. A staccato of rapid Spanish accompanying the show of affection.

Finally, Bart was able to untangle himself and kissed the last person coming out of the house. "Maria, as beautiful as ever. Maria, Pedro, Laetitia, Alonzo, may I introduce my fellow travelers. Marc and Bart Scheerlin. They have been my companions for the last twelve days. Marc, Bart, meet the family Moreno."

Hands were shaken and hugs were given and Maria raised a questioning eyebrow towards Bart which Bart ignored, for now.

He was acutely aware that he couldn't get away without an explanation as to why he took two young men under his wings for almost fourteen days and his request that they put up with a female guest as well.

Maria and Pedro were very dear friends from his time in Zaragoza. When they built this house, Bart loaned them the money, they came short without even questioning how, or when they wanted to pay him back.

During that time Maria pulled, almost tore the story from Bart about why he worked and lived like a hermit at the airport, without even a moment of relaxation.

When she finally had the whole story, she told Pedro, at that time still her fiancée, that she would always look after Bart. Bart was the one who made it possible that they could build their forever home and marry.

Introductions made they all went inside. Maria ushered Bart to the veranda and pushed him in his favorite chair. When she was convinced that he was comfortable she said, "You own me an explanation and I am going to get it."

Bart smiled tired and said, "In due time. First I need some rest."

Maria looked wearily at him. "I don't understand, rest, for you, means solitude. You don't get that when you take two young men with you on a journey. Nor invite a strange woman into your home from home."

Bart shrugged and said, "She's not a strange woman and the mother of Marc and Bart."

Maria looked incredulously and asked bluntly, "Are you keeping something from us? Are they yours? Why is the youngest one called Bart"

Bart barked out a laugh, "No! and softly, "I wish. Their mother is my ex-wife, Linda."

"Now, I'm officially confused. Before she arrives, I want the whole story. I need to know how to treat her. She's not going to put you through hell another time. Not if I can help it."

Maria waited for an answer, but the only thing she heard was a regular breathing and a soft snore from someone who was so exhausted that he just fell asleep.

With a deep sigh she went inside to fetch a blanket to cover Bart up and to tell the rest to leave him alone.

In the kitchen everybody was bustling around. The four young ones had unloaded Marc and Bart's gear from the RV and stashed it in their room. It was obvious that they got on very well from the moment they discovered that all four were happy to speak English and that Marc and Bart both were willing to learn a bit of Spanish.

It was also obvious, at least to Pedro and Maria that Titia took more than a liking to Marc and vice versa. Maria told her husband that there was a serious conversation in the making with their daughter.

Two hours later Bart woke up because someone was shaking his shoulder. He looked up and noticed that it was dark and he was covered up. He stretched and asked, "Titia, how long have I been out?"

Titia giggled, "Two hours and mum said that it's time for dinner, uncle Bart."

Bart stretched again and replied gently, "Tell your mum I'll be there in a jiffy. I just need to splash some water over my head."

Titia nodded, looked at her feet, blushed and asked, "Uncle Bart, do you know if Marc has a girlfriend?"

Bart smiled, "Not that I know, but you can ask his mother. She arrives tomorrow. Do you like him that much already? "

Blushing furiously, she replied, "I've never felt anything like that with another boy. And I think it's mutual. And he's leaving in a few days. "

"Give it time, Little one. He might not be as far away as you think. Talk to your parents, especially your mother. You know you can't hide anything from her, and it wouldn't surprise me if she already noticed."

Bart took her chin in his hand and gently made her look into his eyes, "And thank you for trusting me, Little Joy of mine."

Titia hugged him and kissed him softly on his cheek saying, "If I can't trust my godfather, who can I trust?" She giggled, "And you need a shave."

With that she left him to his own.

=====

The next morning, after observing the necessary formalities, four men were waiting on the ramp for the Antonov to arrive.

After a few minutes they saw the squat aircraft rolling to its designated position. Even as the engines were spooling down the door opened, and the stairs were lowered on the concrete. When the blocks were placed against the wheels a familiar man showed his craggy face.

Bart shouted, "Dave Holmes! What are you doing in this flying tractor?"

Dave's smile almost split his head. "Bart Verbeke, I didn't expect you to welcome me in this neck of the woods. I thought that you left this all behind."

"I come to relieve you of your passenger." Bart replied.

"Your ex-wife."

Bart's face went blank for a second, "I don't want that to become common knowledge Dave."

"We were alone in the cockpit, and this old bird has a voice recorder you can shut down. I did so when she told me and I won't rat. You know that."

"Yeah, you're right. Sorry." Bart replied and noticed Linda at the top of the stairs.

She looked around and spotted her sons, Bart and someone she surmised was from the aircraft handling, or from H.A.T.

Linda skipped down the stairs and embraced her boys. "I'm so happy to see you." She gushed.

After an emotional moment she turned to Bart and hugged him hard, "Thank you, you're a lifesaver." Just before she wanted to pull his head down to kiss him, she remembered who she was holding in her arms.

Quickly she let go and stammered, "Sorry. I didn't mean to... I went too far. Please forgive me?"

Bart froze when he felt that Linda started to kiss him and relievedly answered, "Don't worry about it. Blame it on the stress and emotions."

He motioned Pedro. "Linda, meet your host. Pedro Moreno. You'll be staying in his house as his and his wife Maria's guest."

With the introductions made Bart also introduced the men to Dave, asking him if he would be the one taking them on the return trip the day after tomorrow.

Dave said, "Yeah, first I have to unload two pallets here and the rest is relief goods. I have to fly this bucket to some God forgotten place in Africa and I was the only one qualified to land this bucket on that runway, on such notice."

In the meantime, the cargo was already offloaded. Linda marveled at the efficiency of the operation and mentioned it to Pedro who replied, "Si and all thanks to Bart who whipped the ground crews into shape when he was calling the shots here and we kept working that way."