All Comments on 'Deathless Reign: Prologue'

A good start. Keep the interest going.

Very well done. A violent revenge story is always worth perusing and this one was a classic.

I hope the rest of the story is not written in this style. It's too verbose and wordy. Too many repetitions and distractingly wordy sentences. I didn't feel that I was reading a fantasy, I felt as if I was at an rpg table and the moderator was narrating the background story. But not one of those to the point but captivating stories, rather a story that the narrator is making up on the go and often loosing track. Tolerable for a short story (maybe a spooky tale by the fire), but not one that would keep the readers (or listeners) interested in the long run.

The plot has some promise. And as I see, the following chapters have more or less good ratings on literotica. So I will keep reading with my fingers crossed (as I've often seen, lit readers can be forgiving and some unreadable stories actually have pretty good ratings and a cult following, but no sane publisher would publish one of those. Hopefully this one will not turn out to be one of those.)