Depraved Ep. 01

Fuck Parody

Episode 01 : Finding James

"Where do we find this fucking guy?"

"I have a source that said, check out this bar... so... let's try here."

"Whatever... I mean, what's so great about this guy? We're jumping through hoops for this guy... he better be worth it. He's a pervert and an ex con... why in the hell do the higher ups wanna do this? There's no fucking way this outlaw freak will do this anyway."

"We'll talk him into it... relax... I'll handle it. The boss said we need to get this deal done... so we're gonna get it down. Just relax."

The two HBO executives make their way into The Big Dive bar, outside of Malibu. They sit at the bar and get to work.

"Excuse me... you wouldn't happen to know James, would you? We're huge fans... and we'd really like to meet him." HBO exec.

"Who the fuck is asking?" Gus, the bartender.

"Me and my friend." HBO exec hands Gus $100.

"Got any more fucking friends?" Gus wipes the bar and starts to walk away.

"Wait... Here." HBO exec hands Gus $400.

"Yeah, I know him." Gus walks away.

"Well... could you tell us where we could find him? We have something really important to talk to him about." HBO exec.

"Yeah... I could tell ya." Gus pours himself a whiskey and downs it.

"Well... will you tell us? It's really important. We really need to find him." HBO exec... with desperation in his voice.

The sound of a hard break, in a game of pool, can be heard in the background.

"WHO THE FUCK KEEPS ASKING ABOUT JAMES?" A very large man approaches the two HBO execs... they get real nervous... real fast.

"Well... we're looking for him. We have something really important to talk over with him." The HBO exec, doing all the talking.

"WHAT IS IT?"

"Well... who are you?" The exec asks nervously.

The big man walks out of the shadows... "I'M HIS COUSIN!!" My cousin Braun (WWE Superstar Braun Strowman) smirks at the HBO execs, his pool cue in hand. He walks over to the exec doing all the talking and grabs his shirt. The execs look like they're gonna piss and crap themselves... and run like a little bitch.

"Ummmm... (shaking)... well... we... Ummmm... we need to talk to him about doing a show for HBO... we wanna pay him a lot of money. I promise... we promise... we just wanna talk to him about doing a show for our network... that's all... please don't hurt us." The exec looks away from Braun, closes his eyes, trembling with fear of the 6'8 380 pound Monster Among Men.

Braun smirks, picks the exec up and sits him on the bar. Gus hands him a Jack and Coke... Braun downs it. He motions for another one. Gus gives him another. Braun hands it to the scream shitless TV executive. "DRINK IT!!" Braun orders. The exec almost spills it in fear, but he quickly downs it... coughing... not wanting to anger the giant in front of him.

"How much money?" Braun asks... drinking another Jack and Coke.

"That's between us and him." The quiet exec finally speaks up.

Braun walks over to him and grabs his shirt, picking him up and sitting him on the bar, beside his cohort. Braun slaps his face gently... almost knocking him over. Braun pulls the smart-ass exec to his face... looks right into his eyes and growls, "it's between me and you bitch... you're not talking to James... you're talking to me motherfucker... and don't you fucking forget it... smart off again and you'll... GET... THESE... HANDS!!"

The exec's eyes go wide with fear. Braun smirks. He walks back to the pool table.

"Five million per episode... Twelve episodes per season." The formerly smart-ass exec blurts out. Braun stops... then slowly looks back at the two executives sitting on the bar. He puts his pool cue on the pool table and walks back to them.

"OK... let's talk." Braun sits on a stool and listens to their pitch.

They talk details for a half an hour. "Pardon me for asking, but where is James? It's great... believe me... to talk to you... it really is... but we really need to talk to James about all of this." The non smart-ass exec says, very nicely.

"James is laying low, since he got out of the joint. He doesn't trust people... especially wonderful, honest people in your line of work... no offense." Braun gives the execs a sarcastic smirk.

"Oh... it's fine... don't worry about it." The nice exec smiles.

"Im not." Braun drinks and looks at the TV.

"Is there any chance we could possibly meet with him? Please." The exec smiles again, trying to win over Braun.

"Well... since you said please... NO!" Braun gets up to leave. Before he walks away, Braun says, "give me your fucking number... and wait... I might call you back... or I may not."

The nice exec writes down his number and hands it to Braun. He walks away. "Thank you. It's really important. Thanks again for not hurting us." The exec says smiling.

Braun stops and looks back, with a menacing smirk on his bearded face. "The day's not over yet. Don't speak too soon." Braun ROARS loudly at them. The execs jump back on their stools.

After Braun leaves... and the HBO execs gather themselves, the nice one tells the smart-ass one, "well... I think that went OK... I guess all we do now is wait. We should know by the end of the day. Another success... we're gonna get a big raise for this one." They smile and shake hands... Gus shakes his head at them and walks away.

A week later, the HBO execs are hold up in a hotel in Malibu, when they finally get a call from Braun. "I'M OUTSIDE... GET YOUR SKINNY FUCKING ASSES OUT HERE RIGHT FUCKING NOW!!"

The two execs jump up out of bed and quickly throw some clothes on. They run outside and see a green and gold, pimped out van in the parking lot. It's loud horn beeps and they go over to it. Another cousin of mine, Fat Bastard (from the Austin Powers movies) opens the side door. "GET IN HERE NOWWWW ARSEHOLES!!" He yells, with his thick Scottish accent. The execs quickly squeeze in past Fat Bastard and sit on the floor. The van speeds off.

The execs fall over from the speed of the van, then sit back up. Their eyes go wide. They see my personal sex toy Sunny (WWE Hall Of Fame Diva Sunny) getting her throat roughly fucked by yours truly. She spitting up all over the floor... her fucking saliva is hanging down, vomit is everywhere. I'm holding her head all the way down on my cock, while I pound her fucking throat with it. I pull her head up and she pukes all over my cock again. I force her head back down on it.

Sunny laps up her puke and saliva from my hard throbbing cock, while I abuse her throat some more. Her gargling sounds are loud... they reverberate through the van... as I use her fucking throat. Sunny is my fuck bitch... my property. I grunt, as the HBO execs stare in disbelief. I shoot a huge wad of jizz down her throat.

Sunny makes sure to swallow every fucking drop. I hold her head all the way down on my cock, making sure she does. When I'm done feeding my bitch her jizz breakfast, I let her head up. She looks at me for approval, her face all covered in puke and saliva, her makeup smeared and running down her sexy face. I smack her face and rip her pink shirt open.

I pull Sunny's big titties out of her pink lace bra and smack them hard, pulling and twisting her rock hard nipples, as hard as possible. Sunny screams in lustful pleasure. I spit in her face... she happily laps it up... and i smack it again. I finally look at the HBO execs. Their mouths are wide open, as they stare at me.

The execs finally gather themselves enough to talk. "It's a pleasure to meet you James... Ummmm... you certainly know how to make a first impression." The exec smiles meekly, reaching out to shake my hand.

I motion for Fat Bastard to switch places with me. He walks over the two execs, carting right in their faces. "Oops... Sorry bout that one... it was a squishy one." He giggles. The execs almost puke for the stench.

I sit in the big captains seat and wipe off my myself with a towel. Fat Bastard starts looking at Sunny a d smiling. He's horny. "Do her." I tell him.

"Yes sir... thank you boss man." Fat Bastard grabs Sunny and throws her up on the comfy bed in the back. She screams, startled by his move. She smiles. Sunny loves rough sex. He climbs up on top of her... his giant body covering her. Fat Bastard quickly pulls Sunny's clothes off and his own also. He throws his plaid Bermuda shorts at one of the execs. They land on his face. The exec quickly tosses them off and gags.

Fat Bastard slams his super fat cock up Sunny's well used pussy and goes to work. He farts and fucks. He starts singing some Scottish song, while he plows up Sunny's honey hole, his giant, fat ass, slamming onto Sunny. He big ass cock, pussy molesting her. The bed shakes, as his singing gets louder. His hugely fat and hairy, farting ass, slamming hard onto Sunny. His super fat cock pistoning in and out of Sunny's landing strip topped cunt, with bulldozer power.

"OH FUCKKKKK!! Sunny squirts... Fat Bastard farts a huge one.

"OH YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY DEARY!!" Fat Bastard cums his splattery load. It blasts out then stops then squirts out. He's a weird cummer. He farts again... then falls asleep on top of Sunny.

"Ummmm... I... Ummmm..." The exec stares at Fat Bastard laying on top of Sunny and stammers. He shakes his head to clear it. "I mean... it's gonna be a pleasure to work with you James. This show is gonna be the most talked about show ever. You being you and living your life. It's a sure fire mega hit." He smiles.

"Yeah." I keep it short.

"So do we have a deal?" He extends his hand to me. I think about it. Fat Bastard farts a huge one and snores. The execs fan the air and almost gag again.

"Somebody... get this asshole off of me." Sunny pleads.

"Sure." Once again, keeping it short. I shake his hand. The two HBO execs shake hands and hug, smiling big, happy to get the deal done.

"Get this Fat Bastard off of me... He fucking smells... yuck!" Sunny pleads again. Fat Bastard let's out a huge fart again and keeps snoring. Braun laughs... then pulls over... to rescue poor Sunny from the odorous, farting pit under Fat Bastard.

Later, at home...

"Babe... I'm glad you're gonna do this show. It's time for you to take over again. You've been laying low, but I know you've missed doing your thing." My wife, Kim Kardashian walks over to me, in our bedroom, and hugs me. I smack her ass and squeeze the fuck outta it.

"God, you're gorgeous." Kim says, rubbing all over my lean, muscular body. She squeezes my 12 inch thick cock through my leather pants.

"I want it in my ass." Kim smiles, giving me a seductive, super horny look...

About five minutes later... I'm behind my wife, who's on her hands and knees on our huge bed... POUNDING THE FUCK OUTTA HER WORLD FAMOUS, MEGA PHAT BOOTY! I smack it hard, pulling her long, straight, dark hair, as it's wrapped tightly around my fist. "FUCKKKKKKK... DO MY ASS BABY... FUCK IT GOODDDDDDDDD!!" Kim screams, her head back, her eyes rolled back.

I pull her hair hard and power fuck her booty HARDER HARDER HARDER HARDER HARDER HARDER HARDER HARDER HARDER HARDER!! My huge cock flying up that awesome ass with blazing speed, stretching her anus wide, each thrust powering harder and so fucking deep. "FUCKKKKKKKKKK!!" Kim squirts hard, blasting out her cream, super soaking my pants and the carpet.

I smack her perfectly shaped, smooth, thick ass over and over, leaving a big ass handprint on her right booty cheek. I look at it and smile. I smack it hard again. I pull Kim's beautiful, shiny hair and she moans a very sexy moan.

I drill up Kim's booty faster faster faster faster... Reaching under her, squeezing her hard, pulsating clit. Kim screams in ecstasy... and squirts a massive blast of pussy nut, blasting out of her spasming cunt... her awesome ass squeezing tight around my rock hard, thumping cock.

I push all the way up Kim's ass and cum blast her... a bazooka blast of jizz. My huge cock jerks enthusiastically and pumps my creamy jizz out freaky fast, filling her perfectly tight booty. Some oozes out around my cock, then pours out, when I pull out of her world's greatest booty.

Kim leans back to me and we kiss deeply, lustfully. I roughly squeeze her big tits, rubbing the hard, perky nipples with my thumbs. Kim moans happily into my mouth. She grinds that perfect ass of hers all over my happy cock. I smile and groan into her mouth. She smiles, giggles and shakes her booty on my cock.

Kim breaks our kiss and turns around, leaning down, licking my softening cock. She licks the cum dripping, big head and softly bites it. I grab her hair and watch. She slowly sucks my my plump head clean, shaking her head, sucking intensely... her gorgeous, dark, exotic eyes locked on my blue ones. Unbridled lust burns though her gaze... she sucks me totally clean, her eyes never leaving mine.

A little while later...

Kim and I are laid out by the pool, lounging, sunbathing. She's got a skimpy, black, one piece swimsuit on... and designer shades as well. I have a tight blue speedo on... I like them, so I don't give a fuck... designer shades too. We're drinking margaritas, enjoying the nice Malibu sun.

Kim pulls my cock out and strokes it, getting it ready for the bukkake blast with Sunny... more about that in a minute... Kim leans over and sucks my thick, half hard head, jerking the base of my 12 inches, her thick, luscious lips gliding down and over the thick head, onto my extra large shaft. I sip my margarita and enjoy another couple of minutes of Kim's oral work.

I finally get up and head down to the beach where the crowd has gathered. All of my crew and freaky friends are circled around Sunny... who's laying in the beach. I walk up to her... My huge cock flopping... and I kneel down. I slide up her honey pot and start pussy thumping her, to get everything started. All of the guys start jerking off and the women start playing with their pussies.

Kim comes down, drinking her margaritas and watches. My girlfriend, Japanese porn superstar Hitomi Tanaka films it all.

I thump Sunny twat through a couple of Big O's then pull out, aim my ready to pop cock at her slutty face and paint it with my jizz. Sunny opens her mouth, sticks her tongue out and catches as much of my sweet cream in her mouth as she can. She gulps it down, as I cover her face. When I finish, I piss all over her face and tits, as the crowd cheers.

I totally cover Sunny's sexy face and big ass titties with my warm piss, hitting her open mouth as well. The bitch drinks it down eagerly. I shake my cock, then get up and kiss Kim. We head off down the beach, as the other guys and gals start cumming all over Sunny, completely covering her face, tits, stomach... every inch of her... in cock and pussy cream and piss. Sunny smiles, screaming in ecstasy, loving being a bukkake whore.

Its just another freaky moment in my depraved life... I wonder if the HBO execs really know what they're getting into... on second thought... I really don't give a fuck.