Dirty Thoughts Ch. 06

**Author's note: these exploits are based on consenting self-love and took place when I was of legal age. Masturbation is healthy and natural - and legal!! ***

Masturbation - A little history of self-love

I love masturbating. I always have. I used to get in trouble in my past for laying on the arm of the couch or backs of chairs - although it took a while for me to realize what it was I was actually doing. Once I realized that what I was doing was sexual, finding ways to get myself off has been a constant part of my life. Before I had access to the internet- I was constantly using random household objects to make myself cum.

One of my first sex toys, as I am sure is true for many people - was the bathtub faucet. It did not take long to figure out that running water against my vagina felt good. I spent many hours sprawled in the bathtub, holding my lips open so that the water gushed directly against my clit, or filled my vagina with warm water. Thinking about laying in the bath, the initial shock of the water against my most sensitive parts which quickly turns to pleasure as the water runs over me... it makes me excited now. Showerheads have been another uninspired but classic way of getting off. I can picture in my mind the ritual of getting the water temperature right, switching the setting to "pulse", and then positioning the jet right against my clit. It doesn't take long for me to cum like this.

Many times I resorted to random objects in my room or house to help me get off. I was fixated on penetrating myself - and many times I was looking to find objects that I could use inside myself without hurting myself. There were many times that I fucked myself with a chapstick, just because I was desperate to have something inside me. A tabletop air hockey "stick" (the one that fits in your hand, and is just a plastic nub on a disc for you to use for air hockey) was a trusty addition to my masturbation. That one was perfect for when I was reading Lord of the Rings fan fiction, so I could fuck something without having to use my hands. I was not above inserting small glass bottles into my vagina, although I tried not to do that often, just for safety. The handle of my hairbrush was a well used dildo for many years. One time, in the early years of cell phones - I put my phone on vibrate and in a plastic baggy - then inserted it in myself and called it repeatedly. In my mind - this was going to be life changing, and I was so excited to try it. It was not worth the effort, and was a disappointment to say the least.

I am fairly certain that I broke my own hymen with an electric toothbrush. I could not resist the vibrations and rotations, and even though it was slightly painful and made me bleed - I still achieved orgasm a few times with a toothbrush.

Looking back - I am proud of my innovation and willpower to get off. I am wishful that I had been taught to embrace my sexuality, to not feel embarrassed or ashamed of being so horny and wanting to get myself off. I wish I could have had access to actual toys so that I didn't have to resort to objects that weren't meant for my sexual pleasure. I remember my excitement to bring home a vibrator I finally worked up the courage to buy. I went straight to my room to try it out - and let me just say - joke vibrators are such a disappointment. Before I fully embraced my love of masturbation... things like the bathtub and my hairbrush were more reliable ways to get off.

As an adult, I probably masturbate at least twice a week. Sometimes I masturbate multiple times in a day, and I often find myself rushing to masturbate before my partner comes home. I have been "caught in the act" by him, but I am not trying to hide it - I think I just like the challenge of making myself cum as much and as fast as I can. I have a number of toys, although the intense vibrations of the Hitachi wand are typically my go-to. Sometimes I still use the shower head, and sometimes I ride my dildo on the back/arm of the couch. Masturbation is most definitely one of my favorite pastimes - and I will most likely be masturbating later thinking about my past "conquests".